Horrible Mechanical Failures: Looks Like the Tin Man's Undies After Taco Tuesday

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Horrible Mechanical Failures: Looks Like the Tin Man's Undies After Taco Tuesday

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Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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1500quidporsche posted:

Jesus. Just how much crack were the ford engineers smoking when they designed that thing.

Um... almost every pushrod Vee engine ever is like that with the short timing chain.

Here's a pushrod V8 for comparison.

# ¿ Feb 3, 2015 05:06

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 05:03

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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1500quidporsche posted:

See I always assumed that was the advantage of pushrod engines and that was why the big three clung to them for so long.

Now I can't for the life of me figure out what sort of advantage a pushrod has over a conventional OHC.

To really gently caress with your head here is the obsolete flathead/sidevalve engine:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flathead_engine

And the advanced Pushrod with Variable valve timing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0uiDmcPEekc

# ¿ Feb 3, 2015 06:20

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Uthor posted:

Wait, he got fired for saving Princess Peach?

I liked it better when she was called Princess Toadstool.

# ¿ Feb 22, 2015 02:46

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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It'd have to be a manual because the 4A-FE is loving miserable with the stupid 3 speed automatic they sold them paired to here. (US)

All above the base model got the 7A-FE. Those had the 4 speed auto. There's even a different platform code. AE101 is 4A/3speed and AE102 is 7A/4 speed

Vanagoon fucked around with this message at 21:42 on Feb 24, 2015

# ¿ Feb 24, 2015 21:38

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Slavvy posted:

My tercel has a 4E-FE 1300cc with that 3 speed auto. It isn't that miserable but it isn't pleasant either. Bizarre that they decided to stick a 3 speed on the 1.6 though. We got the 7A-FE in the 'GLX' models which had alloys, 4 wheel discs, top of the line interior etc. Everything else had either a 1.6 or, god help me, a 2E that for some loving retarded reason kept it's carburettor right up until '95.

I knew a guy once who had a Paseo that had a 5E-FE in it. Never rode in it.

I just don't like the Corolla with the 4A-FE/3 speed automatic because it just cannot do hills. Going up a hill in a car so equipped is a "mash down the loud pedal and wait" sort of a deal.

# ¿ Feb 25, 2015 07:06

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Reminds me of the V8 Taurus SHO Cam issue. Cam Sprockets were attached via "Swaging"

http://v8sho.com/SHO/CamFailureLinks.htm

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ford_SHO_V8_engine#Cam_trouble

quote:

Soon after the introduction of the SHO V8 engine, widespread problems with the cam sprockets began to surface. Ford had used a relatively unusual method, called "swaging", of affixing the cam sprockets to the camshafts.The cam sprockets were fastened to the hollow camshafts by forcing a metal ball which was slightly larger than the interior diameter of the camshaft through the center of the camshaft, thus expanding the metal slightly and creating a mechanical bond between the cam sprocket and the camshaft.

This method proved to be inadequate, and the cam sprocket could break loose from the camshaft and spin independently from the camshaft (or "walk").This would result in the camshaft stopping and thus not activating the valves, allowing the pistons to hit the valves, ruining the engine.

# ¿ Mar 9, 2015 07:10

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Not a failure, but using the product of horrible mechanical failures

This rules.

# ¿ Mar 30, 2015 02:09

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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cursedshitbox posted:

the other idiot gently caress that punched a tree and broke his hand. His favorite is greasing carburetors.

Trees don't even yield when you crash into them with surprisingly large vehicles. What in the name of gently caress possessed someone to punch one? With their squishy, fleshy meathook hand? :psyduck:

# ¿ Apr 9, 2015 03:18

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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When I had my 84 Vanagon I went to Home depot and fashioned a replacement for this dumb rear end thing out of plumbing parts so I wouldn't have to deal with it cracking and puking coolant all over my rear bumper ever again.

https://www2.cip1.com/ProductDetails.asp?ProductCode=VWC-025-121-438

# ¿ Apr 17, 2015 01:48

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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KozmoNaut posted:

It's so bad that I would buy a French or Italian car over a VW (or any German car, really) any day of the week.

I would buy a Korean car over any VW.

Would you buy a Chinese car over a VW?

# ¿ Apr 17, 2015 09:53

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Here's another "Germans who build cars are loving mental"

Audi UFO Brakes.
http://www.spannerhead.com/2011/10/21/technical-curiosities-audis-ufo-brakes/

At least, I think this belongs here as it fits with the theme of the germans inventing some new, ludicrously complex way to do a very simple thing.

# ¿ Apr 22, 2015 05:15

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Throatwarbler posted:

I don't really see anything overly complex about the Audi brakes, they seem like a perfectly reasonable idea and the only reason they didn't catch on was because they look weird, and by not catching on it was expensive.

And as the article states they wouldn't look too nice behind the Rimmzzzz people seem to be so enamored of. This is not really a valid objection, but what're ya gonna do?

# ¿ Apr 22, 2015 05:35

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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wolrah posted:

There will always be people holding out hope that installation will actually be the reverse of removal.

Thanks for linking this, I had been looking for it a few weeks ago to show someone how nutty some car designers got, but for some reason I had convinced myself it was a Honda thing instead of Audi.

Honda Gets a Giant gently caress-diddly-uck you! for the Needlessly difficult rotor replacement on the 90s Accord.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uxtSPQ1L4fc

The only time I have ever taken parts back to the store because I couldn't get the job done was because of this poo poo on a 91 Accord.

Tear the entire suspension apart to get the rotor off. :psyduck:

Vanagoon fucked around with this message at 05:43 on Apr 22, 2015

# ¿ Apr 22, 2015 05:41

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Wasabi the J posted:

You know everyone before was Stalin, Lenin things go wrong for so long.

# ¿ Apr 25, 2015 06:11

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Don't be ridiculous, it's clearly a case of Couch Racing:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LNA5cIjm0LY

# ¿ Apr 25, 2015 16:10

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Tekne posted:

VAG's maintenance monstrosity has been reborn with 4 more cylinders. Chains are up against the firewall as god intended.

I'm sure you'll be able to pick up a 2016+ A8 with this engine for a steal in 5 years.

A W12?

I don't get what the groove looking things in the cam bearing surfaces are for.

# ¿ May 12, 2015 04:40

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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I managed to change the three plugs up against the firewall on a camry v6 without removing the upper intake. I had to unbolt a support bracket and that was it.

I mean, it took a lot of swearing and contortion, but I got it done.

If you're stubborn enough you can find a way.

Edit:This was a 1MZ-FE. I don't imagine you could pull this stunt with a 2GR in a newer camry.

Vanagoon fucked around with this message at 13:37 on May 18, 2015

# ¿ May 18, 2015 13:32

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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What is it with Ford and spark plugs? How did they manage to cock up something that's been used pretty much as long as there have been engines so monumentally?

# ¿ May 19, 2015 03:01

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Slack3r posted:

Future horrible mechanical failure?

It's a FWD V8, so probably yes.

Sorry.

# ¿ May 20, 2015 22:59

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Is there a reason they're using a belt with the trapezoidal teeth vs the newer curvilinear ones?

The curved teeth are supposed to take longer to wear, or something..

# ¿ May 26, 2015 19:42

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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If this was a canister type coil I hope it was at least easy to relocate...

# ¿ May 27, 2015 00:04

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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I remember I went to replace the dying factory horn on my vanagon once, only to discover to my dismay that the factory VW horn operates by switching the ground.

Why??

The Autozone horn that I put on would play continuously with the wires one way, and blow the fuse the other way.

I agree with the statement "The engineering is fundamentally faulty".

Switching the gorram ground, jesus!

# ¿ May 29, 2015 00:20

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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kastein posted:

Uhhh, as an electrical engineer with extensive experience working on a variety of automotive electrical systems from several brands, who now works professionally in the automotive industry... yeah that's pretty common. Sorry to burst your bubble.

The reason? N channel MOSFETs and NPN transistors are easier to make, cheaper, for the same current carrying capability; it's safer (worstcase a short to ground will turn the device on, rather than blowing a fuse, destroying a driver transistor, or melting a wire); there are grounds available everywhere in the vehicle. For instance, a 1973 CJ5 does this because the horn switch wire actually runs up the center of the steering column and down through the steering box, and the other contact is just... the steering wheel. A 1994 Justy does the same thing, for the same reason (except there is a slipring and a spring loaded contact.) Most 90s jeeps I'm aware of do this, at least on the switch side, the horn is run by a relay which switches the positive wire to the horn.

You can buy two terminal horns almost anywhere anyways, they're super common.

Well shucks I done got schooled today..

Sorry.

# ¿ May 29, 2015 02:11

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Pilot bearing removal with bread :stare:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nkRmKWktW70

# ¿ Jun 24, 2015 04:52

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Boxer engines seem like such a good idea in theory, what with being balanced and smooth and all, but it seems the implementation always sucks.

Inline 4s may vibrate, but they don't (often) do that kind of poo poo.

# ¿ Oct 22, 2015 14:31

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Torn Quad Jones posted:

Piston out of a Toyota 4 banger current recall for oil consumption.

The 1ZZ-FE does this bullshit too. Just gives me a reason to rev it like a maniac to try and keep the pistons halfway clean.

# ¿ Jan 30, 2016 06:09

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SCA Enthusiast posted:

Bicycles are great

Bicycles are terrible and the people who ride them are worse.

# ¿ Mar 31, 2016 17:29

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nm posted:

Bad cyclists don't almost kill me, bad drivers do.

Bad cyclists get themselves killed. Which leads to drivers getting arrested/jailed, even if it was the cyclists fault.

# ¿ Apr 1, 2016 00:03

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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I hope they kept the plug that the pipe took out of the tire as a trophy.

# ¿ Apr 27, 2016 04:57

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Regarding Connecting Rod chat:

The little 1ZZ-FE in my shitbox corolla is supposed to be using these Powder Metal, fractured cap connecting rods.

http://www.chevelles.com/forums/18-engine/200219-powdered-metal-rods.html

http://carbuzzard.com/2011/10/cracked-connecting-rods-technology-you-want-in-an-engine/

Doesn't make a difference in a little barely stressed corolla engine, but I wonder if they end up absolutely destroyed like in the above pic more or less often than forged or cast in a hipo motor.

Interested because this is a tech I had not previously heard of.

# ¿ May 1, 2016 03:21

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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double post mother fucker.

# ¿ May 1, 2016 03:23

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Slavvy posted:

Almost everything has fracture split rods nowadays, they're used more for consistency and price across millions of engines than any performance benefit.

1ZZ Rods are thin little fuckers:

Must be pretty strong.

# ¿ May 1, 2016 03:26

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Disgruntled Bovine posted:

More detail than you probably need, but yes, CPM can be good.

It's not, actually. I enjoy a good, in depth :spergin:

explanation.

Continue :allears:

I know I've bounced off the rev limiter in the aforementioned beater 2000 corolla much more than I should ever admit and it takes it like a champ.

Edit: Wanted to note that I beat it so because it's one of the cars saddled with the idiotic 3 speed automatic.

Vanagoon fucked around with this message at 00:33 on May 2, 2016

# ¿ May 1, 2016 19:05

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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xzzy posted:

VW built their reputation on cars without coolant, so maybe adding it in is where they went wrong.

Indeed.

Great Moments in Crappy Engine History: Volkswagen Wasserboxer
http://www.sub5zero.com/great-moments-crappy-engine-history-volkswagen-wasserboxer-w-video/

# ¿ Jun 19, 2016 20:21

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Geirskogul posted:

From the picture it doesn't even look based on the more robust Type 4 engine, instead a Type 1 that they added a water jacket to (like, literally just added it).

The water cooling is basically just tacked on. The heads are "sealed" to the water jacket by what amounts to a big O-ring.

In a pressurized, water cooled engine this means that the coolant doesn't want to stay in the engine as the seal ages.

VW offers this special black water jacket seal glue just for this engine.

# ¿ Jun 20, 2016 01:56

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Cakefool posted:

Handy with a welder (and mastic)? You too can enjoy an OEM quality water jacket retrofit!

Weld the cylinder head to the water jacket. Problem solved.

# ¿ Jun 20, 2016 10:03

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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DethMarine21 posted:

Yeah my brother has an E39 M5 and it has that problem. It's an issue with the secondary air injection system specifically. He daily drives it on a highway to get to work and definitely isn't the most conservative driver but it cropped up anyway. At this point those cars are getting up there in terms of mileage so it almost seems like an inevitability that this issue will come up unless you take it to the track for a full-on Italian tuneup every few months or pull the heads and get them walnut blasted. Like someone else mentioned it doesn't really seem to affect performance and just turns a light on so he ignores it.

Also while we're on the topic of carbon buildup..

2005 Corolla (1ZZ-FE engine) that I did the intake manifold gasket on a while back. The factory manifold gasket was poorly designed piece of trash that could fail as early as 30k miles and this one still had it at ~130k with the associated massive vacuum leak. The entire intake tract has a nice thick layer of buildup but the valves were perfectly clean. I never did find out where all that oil came from. The dipstick level never moves so it's almost as if someone dumped half a bottle of oil on one corner of the engine and left it there.

1ZZ-FEs are notorious for burning/using oil. One of the big culprits is PCV valves that never get changed and block up, which I assume forces oil vapors backwards down the fresh air hose for the PCV system.

# ¿ Oct 11, 2016 20:22

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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If we're going to talk about badass industrial use vehicles the Tug tow tractor deserves a nod.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MBZZcfFAG6A

When I worked at FedEx, I witnessed these things getting whipped hard all day every day, only ever saw one break, the 2 speed automatic transmission in it hosed up. Never saw one with busted studs or axles or anything.

As a bonus, a lot of the older ones use the Ford 4.9/300ci Straight Six.

How can you not love a vehicle who's entire front is just a goddamned solid steel plate.

Tug Drifting:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jy_iAy0qWlw

Vanagoon fucked around with this message at 13:11 on Jan 21, 2017

# ¿ Jan 21, 2017 13:04

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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Another Tug memory, once I saw a ramp agent butt the front end of a tug against the side of a building and do a burnout, and when he backed up, it had torn up the pavement more than it hurt the tug tires.

There were steel railings surrounding all the buildings at the hub, mind.

# ¿ Jan 21, 2017 18:43

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 05:03

Vanagoon: Jan 20, 2008; Best Dead Gay Forums
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MrChips posted:

So it was a beautiful July afternoon; sunny and warm, without a cloud in the sky. I was working a double shift that day (like every other loving day that summer) tossing bags and turning airplanes. I'm not a hundred percent clear on the details, but apparently someone working in the bag room, where we would receive and manually sort every piece of luggage inbound and outbound, decided it would be a good idea to open up one of the many kennels that would come through during the course of a normal day. Even though this wasn't expressly forbidden by the company, it was also not a very good idea for obvious reasons. Most of the time the dogs would be happy to get out, stretch their legs and get some much-needed pets before continuing on their journey. This day though, one particular dog had other ideas.

Instead of just hanging around, the second the ramp attendant opened the kennel, this dog loving bolted; across the bag room, jumped clear over the carousel and out the door and onto the ramp. Needless to say, this caused a small amount of panic in the bag room, so a couple of them headed out to try and corral the stray pooch, all whilst trying to avoid making a discernable scene for the passengers in the terminal up above. Now for a few minutes the rampies are doing a pretty good job keeping the dog more or less corralled out of sight, but because I'm telling this story, you just know that isn't gonna stay that way for long. The dog, tongue flapping in the wind and tail wagging madly, breaks through the line of rampies and is now out in the middle of the ramp, in plain view of everyone in the terminal...among them, our notoriously short-tempered station manager, whose eye was naturally drawn to the growing commotion on the ramp.

On the other side of the terminal, enjoying a moment of calm sitting on my baggage tug, waiting for my next flight to arrive, I hear the radio crackle to life with his angry voice:

"All Available Turn Crews - GET. THAT. DOG. NOW."

The urgency of his voice was palpable; not only was madder than a brush that this happened in the first place, he wasn't about to explain to a tearful family why Buddy was murked before their very eyes by the airport authority...They had a strict "shoot-to-kill" policy for any animals they spotted out on the taxiways or runways, and since our ramp essentially backed into both, there was no time to lose. A cacaphony of radio traffic ensued, and I unhooked the train of baggage carts hooked up and raced off to try and help.

When I rounded the corner to that side of the terminal, what I saw was nothing short of poetry in motion; tugs racing around randomly, people alternately chasing and scattering as they tried to both corral the dog and avoid being run over, the station manager's angry little face pressed to the glass up in the terminal and one gleeful dog having a wonderful play, racing toward the active runway, an airport authority truck sitting ominously between the dog and his goal. Seeing the dog running in my direction, I jokingly call "tally-ho" into the radio and join the chase, weaving back and forth as I honk the horn, trying desperately to keep the dog on the ramp and off the evening news. I see a flash of white in the corner of my eye and slam on the brakes, smoking the tires and skidding sideways as I broadside another tug, it's driver no doubt target-fixated on the dog. Looking over at the other driver we both shrug it off and continue on our way, as I begin to imagine what colour the station manager's face turned as he witnessed us ricochet off each other like a pair of bumper cars at the fairgrounds.

Seemingly a couple moments later, the dog just decided to give up and laid down on the ramp, satisfied at the chaos they just spawned. A ramper scooped them up and carried the dog back to their kennel, this concluding the mayhem. The next day, everyone got a stern dressing-down, and we were told in no uncertain terms that kennels should NEVER be opened under any circumstances.

This is wonderful.

# ¿ Jan 21, 2017 19:42

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Horrible Mechanical Failures: Looks Like the Tin Man's Undies After Taco Tuesday

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