Horrible Mechanical Failures: Looks Like the Tin Man's Undies After Taco Tuesday

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Horrible Mechanical Failures: Looks Like the Tin Man's Undies After Taco Tuesday

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

goddamn I love this thread

# ¿ Oct 31, 2009 18:32

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# ¿ Apr 19, 2024 01:31

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

My favorite part of the thread is the guys wrangling over whether or not Nissan techs can detect a tune in the black box.

"Gee guys I heard it only stores 36 hours of data, I mean it's just a little box right?"

"Yeah just remove the tune, they can't prove you did anything."

# ¿ Feb 2, 2010 02:18

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

SNiPER_Magnum posted:

I like how one person says to open your doors and leave the ignition on for 36 hours, and another says "That is actually the most logical solution I've heard of". What the gently caress, how is that logical?

: If the battery dies them japs can't read poo poo!

:clint:

: Whadda ya mean you've heard of the 36 hour glitch? You can see that my doors were open with the accessory on? Well goddamn.

# ¿ Feb 2, 2010 03:52

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

UsernameExists posted:

My favorite personal disaster:

Miata + Way too much power = Boom

It was quite an experience at ~75mph, believe me. All told, bent output on transmission, destroyed driveshaft, rear subframe, halfshafts, powerplant frame, hole in gas tank, and more I'm probably forgetting.

This is American V-8 drag car territory. I salute you.

# ¿ Feb 20, 2010 00:20

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

That's the most beautiful failure I've ever seen. It has a natural perfection, like a mountain range, or sunset.

I bet it made a pleasing sound :3:

# ¿ Mar 14, 2010 14:35

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

Cakefool posted:

Some people fail to understand their engine requires air.

Some people fail to understand that cars hydroplane and the engine can still be running as they get swept downriver.

# ¿ May 30, 2010 12:49

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

CommieGIR posted:

I hate safety wire....

Same here. I worked for like two years in an aircraft refurbish shop right out of high school, and landing gear is the bane of my existence.

In a close second is the scar-inflicting pitot tube.

# ¿ Jun 13, 2010 12:28

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

Sponge! posted:

And that's exactly what separates snow drivers from normal people. We know that "Add throttle, dab of oppo perhaps." is a valid and proper choice. 99% of the population is like ZOMG BRAKES I NEED TO STOP NOW STOP STOP STOP! Followed by the sound of folding metal and plastic.

Yeah, exactly. If I get trapped somewheres during a storm in my 2wd Ram, it's always funny passing stuck bro trucks as I go slow as gently caress with plenty of counter steer to compensate for the locked rear. They kind of look at me like I'm some kind of wizard, but it's just normal common sense driving. No matter how good you think your car is in the snow, the weak link is always the person using it.

# ¿ Jan 16, 2011 14:49

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

at least it didn't catch fire

# ¿ Jan 17, 2011 13:33

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

Ola posted:

Those massive, ridiculous American tractors are unnecessary for the job and bad for the environment. Dutch tractors are lean, mean, efficient, quite taxed and useful in the city.

we use turbines too

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtUB1yI035g

# ¿ Jan 27, 2011 01:26

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

Splizwarf posted:

I know this thread really doesn't include racing crashes usually, but this one was caused by the failure of an access gate at the worst time possible. Michael Waltrip at Bristol, 1990.

He walked away unhurt.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QVlj7F8OJCY

They didn't fix that design until the same thing happened a few years later.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tuzCc0hBKYE

Don't ask me how neither died.

Seizure Meat fucked around with this message at 02:09 on Jan 29, 2011

# ¿ Jan 29, 2011 02:04

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

Skyssx posted:

Brake fluid is also a great bee killer.

This too. My boss can hit them from the hip when we are working way out in the auction yard with the abandoned vehicles.

# ¿ Apr 6, 2011 13:00

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

Paul Boz_ posted:

Please. Look at the vehicle that each manufacturer is putting out right now and tell me that Ford's quality and attractive vehicles have nothing at all to do with their current success. GM had the misfortune of selling poo poo vehicles and Chrysler hosed themselves on the Daimler deal.

No, it's true. Ford dodged the bullet by like 6 months by leveraging everything they had, with Chrysler and GM set to revamp a bit later. That was a smart move on Fords part, but it wasn't because they could see the economic collapse coming, it was because they were actually the worse off of the big 3. In the early to mid 00's, GM was still numero uno with the SUV sales, and Chrysler was fresh off the successful 90's with things like the 300C and Charger on the slate. Mercedes then raped Chrysler of money, Katrina destroyed SUV sales, and all three were in trouble.

Auto design takes time, and what you see rolling out of GM and Chrysler now was in the pipeline years ago, for the most part. Ford really did get lucky. They were 6 months ahead of a product line revamp, and then a disaster happened. Timing is everything.

e- remember the Ford Five Hundred? The Freestyle? Yeah.

Seizure Meat fucked around with this message at 17:32 on Jul 7, 2011

# ¿ Jul 7, 2011 17:30

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

ApathyGifted posted:

Still exists, as the Taurus. (They cancelled the Taurus, then just rebadged the 500 since it filled the same niche and had better brand recognition.)

The Freestyle was rebadged as the Taurus X (The station wagon version), but that was discontinued in '09.

So basically, those cars weren't really failures, they were just rebadged for better brand recognition when Ford consolidated models to stop competing with itself.

Edit: The Taurus is still sold as the Five Hundred outside of the U.S. and Canada.

I work for Ford, I know what happened to them, lol

Just illustrating the point that Ford had a period in the mid 00's where they really lost their way. Why was it named the Five Hundred in the first place? IT'S A TAURUS :psyduck:

# ¿ Jul 7, 2011 20:29

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

14 INCH DICK TURBO posted:

I was around the 300 foot line and my vision went blurry when they went past. It went so far beyond sound and became an elemental force. It was honestly the closest I've felt to a legitimate religious exerience and I wept because of it. God only knows what one letting go would sound like.

This is back a bunch, but yeah, Top Fuel engines are very loud when they explode.

A fun game to play is to see what part flies the farthest, you'd be surprised.

# ¿ Aug 14, 2011 04:39

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

MrChips posted:

There's always flywheel explosions, though.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYIdJCvK4uQ (embedding disabled, sorry)

I hate to go back a few pages, but it said "ow".

# ¿ Nov 18, 2011 02:21

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

Hypnolobster posted:

Jesus christ.. If he hadn't locked the front brakes, the damage it could have caused had it gone back the other way down the track would have been absolutely horrific.

This actually happened, it killed the driver and one of the crew back at the lights IIRC.

Don Garlits managed to shut his off despite being injured.

Then there's this.

And this.

Seizure Meat fucked around with this message at 00:39 on Nov 26, 2011

# ¿ Nov 26, 2011 00:36

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

EightBit posted:

I'm pretty sure that at 28 years old and in ok shape, I'd have a loving heart attack or two running from that stuff.

I don't know what a metal flouride fire looks like, but I sure don't want to find out.

Kind of on topic, my dad was the superintendent of maintenance at a chemical plant for like 20 years. That means I'm terrified of weird things, like railway cars filled with benzene. If those trains went off, it would have leveled everything for a mile.

# ¿ Dec 10, 2011 22:55

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

They give THAT guy fluorine?

# ¿ Dec 10, 2011 23:51

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

I just told my dad about that story and he was laughing about it. I guess they had a boiler explosion that was kind of similar, fuckup at a higher level and a newer hire let the pressure build too much. It landed a quarter mile away.

# ¿ Dec 11, 2011 14:06

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

some texas redneck posted:

You mean something like this? (okay that's with propylene but still...)

Exactly like that, but with arsenic and mercury mixed in :laugh:

# ¿ Dec 12, 2011 22:53

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

Chinatown posted:

How fast would you have to be going in order to do that.

Most of the mass is below the main damage and H2's are mostly plastic.

# ¿ Dec 14, 2011 23:41

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

I work at an auction, and there is no terror greater than driving a bank owned supercar. I've driven a lot of the big boys from the past decade, and knowing how powerful and unforgiving they are, combined with the fact that they are owned by a large corporation scares the gently caress out of me.

We had a breathed on Ford GT come through and I was so scared of it I kept stalling trying to go in first gear. I ended up just starting it in second.

e- it was much easier to flog a legit 454SS Chevelle for some reason, probably because my boss told me to.

e2- as far as my lottery fantasy, I'd need a Cheetah, replica or otherwise. They are basically coffins with wheels, so that shows my level of intelligence.

Seizure Meat fucked around with this message at 14:54 on Dec 25, 2011

# ¿ Dec 25, 2011 14:49

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

InitialDave posted:

Who wants to see some idiots? Course you do! Ladies and Gentlemen, the North of England retarded vehicle recovery finalists:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8lMxYnGIrw

That poor winch. It's crying.

This is how we do it in America.

Seizure Meat fucked around with this message at 18:20 on Dec 31, 2011

# ¿ Dec 31, 2011 18:11

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

EightBit posted:

They went through all the trouble of building up that truck and left it with open differentials?

Eh, just throw a big block at it. Half of them weren't wearing shoes.

# ¿ Jan 1, 2012 14:10

Seizure Meat: Jul 23, 2008; by Smythe

Slack3r posted:

Nah.. Pull the plugs and drain the coolant out of the cylinder(s). Then replace head/gasket and drive 350K miles more.

Calling shenanigans on the seized 4.0L.... Unless there are moving parts that left the crankcase, the 4.0 is unstoppable.

I thought my dad was the only person I knew who blew up a 4.0, he had a temporary drain plug in the oil pan, and when he went to remove it to put a replacement on, somehow it went into the pan instead of off it. He said "who cares", put the new plug on, filled it with oil, and got over 50k miles more until the temporary plug traveled into the rotating mass and eventually windowed the block. He then drove it twenty miles to the dealership when he got his new truck. It was seriously impressive. When the nuclear apocalypse comes, I'm not getting the last of the V8 interceptors to roam the wasteland, I'm finding a 4.0 instead.