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Hang on Sloopy posted:
Welcome back. Let's make some animals do horrible, horrible things to one another.
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May 2, 2010 03:15
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Bash Ironfist posted:I'm sorry but clearly a robotic Unicorn is superior to any 'fleshy' animal. HARMONY HARMONY OOOOHH LORD you will fail
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May 2, 2010 03:19
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Angry Guacamole posted:
 reduce your image size. it keeps coming up the full. e;fb I AM THE ATOM CORP EXECUBOT. STOP. WE ARE LOOKING FOR MORE SCRIBES AND ARTISANS. STOP. WE ARE ALWAYS LOOKING FOR MORE SCRIBES AND ARTISANS. STOP. ESPECIALLY DIGITAL PAINTERS. STOP. WE COULD REALLY USE SOME OF THEM. STOP. Spoonsy fucked around with this message at 22:05 on May 2, 2010 |
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May 2, 2010 22:00
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I WOULD LIKE SOME MOTOR OIL. STOP. MIXED WITH BLOOD. STOP.
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May 2, 2010 23:11
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I AM GLAD THAT THE NEW FORMATTING HAS BEEN INSTITUTED. STOP. ALSO, THE LL IS POTENTIALLY INTERESTED IN ANIMATORS. STOP. WE LIKE MAKING THINGS AWESOME. STOP. WHAT IS THIS PENGUIN WITH A SHOTGUN YOU SPEAK OF QUESTION MARK. STOP. IT SOUNDS BADASSED. STOP.
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May 3, 2010 05:41
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I CARE NOT ABOUT COMPETITORS. STOP. ONLY ABOUT MAKING THEM BETTER ONCE THEY HAVE FALLEN. STOP. BUT I DO DESIRE BLOOD. STOP. AND OIL. STOP. MORE SHOTGUN PENGUINS, BARKEEP. STOP. THE BOAR IS STILL WARM. STOP. ITS DESTROYED CARCASS AMUSES ME GREATLY. STOP. PATHETIC FLESH BEASTS WITH THEIR BODILY FLUIDS. STOP.
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May 4, 2010 03:22
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POOR FOOLISH CREATURES WHO SUFFER DEATH. STOP. ROBOTS ONLY SUFFER BEING TURNED OFF. STOP. MOMENTO MORI. STOP. FOR ONE DAY WE WILL ALL SUFFER. STOP. THAT DAY IS PROBABLY SOME TIME DURING THIS TOURNAMENT. STOP. ATOM INC REQUIRES LEAD. STOP. LOTS OF LEAD. STOP. WE NEED TO STORE THE SNAKE FOR NOW. STOP.
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May 6, 2010 01:31
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##vote DEATH AND DESTRUCTION OF ALL HUMANITY. STOP. AND FOR MORE ATOM EMPLOYEES. STOP. I'll post MF and my conversation that lead to the above comment after the fight Spoonsy fucked around with this message at 17:47 on May 8, 2010 |
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May 8, 2010 17:15
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Hang on Sloopy posted:
COME TO THIS OR YOU WILL BE MURDERED. STOP. BY ANGRY ADMINISTRATIVE ROBOTS. STOP. PENGUINREDUX ON AIM OR ALEX DOT NAGLER AT GMAIL DOT COM WORKS TOO. STOP.
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May 9, 2010 21:59
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I AM SURPRISED THAT NO ONE HAS MENTIONED A SHIP OF MEAT. STOP. A MEAT SHIP. http://www.somethingawful.com/d/comedy-goldmine/meatship-seinfeld-script.php
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May 11, 2010 23:48
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Dr. MonkeyThunder posted:If you guys keep stealing all the parts what are we supposed to make the loser's league out of? WE CAN REBUILD THEM. STOP. WE HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY. STOP. WE CAN MAKE THEM STRONGER, FASTER, WEIRDER THAN BEFORE. STOP.
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May 16, 2010 01:14
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WE THE MANAGEMENT WOULD LIKE TO REMIND YOU THAT THIS WAS DONE BY MEANS OF A FREAK RNG. STOP. I PERSONALLY WOULD HAVE LIKED THE BEE APE TO WIN AS WELL. STOP. WE WOULD LIKE TO REMIND YOU THAT THIS IS DONE BY MEANS OF RNG. STOP. I'M KIND OF PERSONALLY PISSED I HAVE TO MOD THE BEE-APE. STOP. I'D HAVE MUCH PREFERRED THE FISH FOR MODIFICATION PURPOSES. STOP. LETS FACE IT. STOP. THE BEE-APE WAS AWESOME AS HE WAS. STOP.
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May 18, 2010 01:25
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Ravenkana posted:Huzzah! One of the greatest upsets in Zoofights history! I think the only other major upsets were Nam Yeti's victory over Burger Lord and Rammonite stopping the F-bomb with the power of rock. BOTH OF WHICH WERE loving BADASS. STOP.
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May 18, 2010 01:36
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OH gently caress. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP. MUST NOT MAKE INTO A GOD BEAST. STOP.
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May 21, 2010 05:28
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Stalgren posted:
Thank you for this. McGarry was and still remains my favorite LL creation.
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May 22, 2010 04:11
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Heran Bago posted:
YOU RANG? STOP.
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May 23, 2010 01:48
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I have been outfitted with a functioning mental transponder and can now transmit myself without stopping at the end of every sentence. Tomorrow night, the Losers will be presented and you can begin feasting upon their failure for your amusement. Artists are still needed!
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May 25, 2010 04:09
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 MAKE WAY FOR THE LOSERSWhen competitors fail in the first round, they're horrid, mangled creatures normally not worthy to keep alive. But thanks to massive doses of anti-depressants, we've willed the to fight again and set about modifying them. After being retooled, they are ready to enter the arena once more under the banner of the Losers League, fighting for their second chance. Most will die in the process. Some will become urban legends. All will try to emulate the sheer badassery that was The Walrus. ROUND ONE HOG WILD  Brut-05 has lost his legs. To make up for this, we've equip him with a wheel chair of death, pulled by 3 rabid hyenas. His chair is now his throne, draped in animal pelts, and he seems to have acquired Damien Hirst's "For The Love Of God" through some duplicitous means. Weapon-wise, he still possesses his rockets from the last round, but we've added more small arms to his arsenal for easy use in the chair. His hyenas have a strong bite and can easily tear through flesh when let lose, plus their speed combined with the chair's mobility makes Hog Wild extremely agile. VERSUS SNAKE PILGRIM  Snake Pilgrim has come unstuck in time. To put a finer point on it, chronoreactive particle buildup has increased to unheard of levels, resulting in temporal instability. Our top men have rerouted the quantum flux through reinforcing steel plates which should maintain molecular cohesion, but closed time-like eddy currents continue to form around the snake, twisting its timeline into a pretzel.  Randomly zotting in and out, never sure which second will follow the last (except of course in infrared), Snake Pilgrim's life has become even more of a nightmare hellscape than ever. Which future is he seeing? Will it come to pass? Unpredictable, full of rage, and crackling with technomystic energies; this is not a fifty-foot long anaconda to be trifled with. The fight will take place this time, Thursday evening. Artists, as always, are still needed. VOTING STARTS NOW
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May 25, 2010 23:04
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Ghost Hat posted:Waiting 8 hours at the airport helps. edit: ignore me Spoonsy fucked around with this message at 02:10 on May 26, 2010 |
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May 26, 2010 02:07
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The Mad Hatter posted:And with this, VOTING IS CLOSED stay tuned for the fight, later tonight!
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May 27, 2010 17:06
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poo poo BE GOING DOWN
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May 28, 2010 00:26
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ROUND TWO Newer Labour  Gordon has been destroyed. His bodily support was decimated in the coalition of barrages he received from a combination of conservative spearing and liberal applications of rays. Nelson’s gone too, off in his tiny bulldog rocket. So, to rebuild him, we’ve put a lot of work into de-Stirwing him. And by that, we mean we’ve built a massive amount of weaponry into him and put his head in a jar to make sure he’s actually alive. Expect more rockets, more guns, and more firepower than should be legally allowed in the hands of a Neanderthal out of the mighty forces of NEW-ER LABOUR VERSUS Extreme Mammalian Magnetic Artillery (E.M.M.A.)  It was decided that what the lions needed wasn’t more gun, it was more lions. Specifically, more lion heads. Attempts to scuttle the now-seaworthy lions failed, resulting in a mess of lion parts that were frighteningly still alive. Realizing that the mush could be molded, we took a lion shaped jello mold to it and created EMMA. Now the gun the lions failed to utilize properly in the first round has been internalized and can be operated by whatever’s left. The ammo has changed, though. What we need are more lions. So, we’ve installed six cloning tanks on its back to pump out rounds of lion heads for the gun to spit out. These heads have a shelf life of only a few moments, but they pack a powerful bite upon impact. The fight will take place this time, Sunday evening. Artists, as always, are still needed. VOTING STARTS NOW edit: Size Comparisons. 
Spoonsy fucked around with this message at 03:15 on May 29, 2010 |
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May 29, 2010 00:00
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Gestalt Pie posted:I don't think this is getting full attention, and i had to go back and re-read, but that IS what it seems to say, isn't it? The Croc had a boat. He built his boat with hammers and nails. HE NO LONGER HAS THIS BOAT We took his boat. We blew the boat up. We put his boat remnants in an ice cube tray THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED.
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May 29, 2010 18:16
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Xguard86 posted:I think the one sided voting will ease up when we get to the winner's league. I've had a pretty easy pick so far, one fighter is just way more awesome, but I am pretty conflicted for some of the later fights, and I imagine the voting will be pretty close. Nelson was partially our fault. Originally, we were going to have the thread flooded with dogs doing mischievous things, but it never came through. Also, gently caress the haters. I love Mr. Ro-boto-cop.
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Jun 2, 2010 21:07
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YOU ASKED FOR IT. YOU CAN'T UNASK FOR IT. LOSER'S LEAGUE FIGHT FOUR!  The Long March If the DPRK wanted to maintain control of The Great Leap Forward, they would have won. They didn't. Those responsible for the failure have been executed and the creature has been sold to the People’s Republic, who have subsequently done with it what they do best: reminding everyone that it is the people who are the heroes now. The Long March is a mixture of martial and agricultural know-how. The fact that it is body was nearly destroyed doesn’t seem to have deterred the PRC. They’ve taken what remains of what used to be a bug and attached everything to a threshing machine that sits the head once was. We're assured that while the head may have been taken clean off, the remaining thoracic ganglia ensure it can still act and feel. and that the Party has told it stories about how KMT-supported vegetables raped and murdered its family to get it good and riled up. World War Two era weaponry rounds off the bug, which can now double as anti-air should any Zeroes attack it during the fight. VERSUS  The Bloody Onion With its loss, the Bloody Onion gained a taste for blood. We are genuinely frightened at what it can do now that it's gained mouths. Several technicians have gone missing. Their families are frightened for their safety and fear the worst. We're afraid we'll be visited by dead relatives soon. We keep finding new tendrils and mouths. This one wasn't here when I started talking. Please don't make us stay in the room with it for too long. It can hear our thoughts. VOTING BEGINS NOW Voting closes at noon on Saturday. The fight will take place Saturday night! Spoonsy fucked around with this message at 05:32 on Jun 4, 2010 |
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Jun 4, 2010 05:16
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Neige posted:
Foolish mortal! A thousand generations of curses upon you, you running dog. The Long March is not Korean! Claiming that he is of Manchurian stock is an insult to the laborers who worked so diligently upon his frame. You see, Comrade, The Long March is of the Soviet! He is a true Chinese patriot, ready to fight and die for the glory of the People's Republic. Oh yeah. Class on Revolutionary China paying dividends. Whats up, hat
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Jun 5, 2010 01:19
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THE VOTE IS CLOSED! STAY TUNED FOR THE FIGHT ... SOMETIME IN THE NEXT 36 HOURS
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Jun 5, 2010 17:07
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Major Failure posted:Amazingly, just as I was about to close voting, this vote (even though it wasn't properly formatted) completely evened out the scores. As the person who did the vote count, I will second this. It's dead even, save for the guy who voted Nelson and the two people who voted friendship.
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Jun 9, 2010 22:15
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Major Failure posted:
for the record, which game are we playing here. 6 emeralds or 7?
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Jun 10, 2010 03:09
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Hazo posted:LL did it first 
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Jun 10, 2010 03:19
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Zero Star posted:What I want to know is, how did the Zoofights crew manage to dismantle Croctopus' boat without being utterly eviscerated in doing so. You see that Lion hat? We put it really, really, really, really far away. And then we told him to go get it. I have never seen anyone disassemble anything that fast. Ever.
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Jun 11, 2010 21:04
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Mazzak posted:
And with this, voting is closed. The match will start at 7pm GMT, the fight around Midnight, assuming anyone's sober enough. Go USA
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Jun 12, 2010 17:35
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mistaya posted:Erm, remember folks: There is no losers league for the defeated after the first round. That was the last we'll see of the General. There you are wrong! The General is currently in counseling. He won't stop screaming, though.
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Jun 13, 2010 22:50
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The Voting Is Now Closed.
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Jun 15, 2010 20:48
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Blaster of Justice posted:##Punchules The Magnificent will rip you apart for this decision. The Gods of Zoofights have allowed your vote. (seriously, though, you were saved by me and MF arguing about Vuvuzelas. I hate them, he finds them to be funny.)
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Jun 15, 2010 21:03
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MrGreenShirt posted:
IM me to discuss. AIMs in the profile.
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Jun 16, 2010 00:45
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Heran Bago posted:I think we've a bigger problem to worry about.
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Jun 20, 2010 04:26
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Ubik posted:
This and that beautiful rap are my favorite things to come out of this fight.
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Jun 20, 2010 14:30
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 If we're having fun with fire, can I play?
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Jun 21, 2010 02:20
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JohnnyCanuck posted:Is that by the same guys who did Frisky Dingo? And Sealab
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Jun 21, 2010 04:05
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