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NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Concealment ain't cover.

See: 98% of the movies out there. Interior drywall based walls aren't going to stop a furious fusillade of bullets directed at them and won't protect the jerkoff hiding behind the drywall from getting shot.

Way Of The Gun has a few scenes where they fire through walls as people run out of rooms in an attempt to hit the bad guy through the wall. One of the Steven Segal movies has a scene like that too. It's the one that opens in some Spanish speaking country. A prostitute lulls Steve's partner into complacency, then she whips up a hidden pistol and POW! puts holes in him. She then shuts the door. Steve runs up and perforates the room door and walls, slides open the door, and there's a dead hooker.

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NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

To counter Cyrano's "Bad" forSPR, I will add some "good" from that same movie. While the blanks in the .45 are apparently filled with black powder, the high explosives in the artillery, mortars, and grenades are apparently NOT filled with 5 to 55 gallons of gasoline each.

Also, detonating a few pounds of TNT in your hands in a sock doesn't just have you get blown backwards and fall to the ground with a bit of Elmer Fudd quality blackface smudging, you are goddamn homogenized.

Likewise, someone firing a 20mm cannon loaded with AA HE-frag rounds at you and hitting you (or hitting the tank you're crawling on right next to you) will blow you into component parts.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I said that I really liked the scene in Saving Private Ryan where the guy trying to blow the tracks off the tank with a few pounds of TNT demo charges in his sock got turned into a cloud of bone flecked goo. Also, bombs and grenades and artillery rounds apparently don't have any fragmentation effects in movies. At least in M*A*S*H the primary wound they were operating on were mortar or artillery splinters stuck in the guy's innards.


Fat Ogre posted:

Did you even read this thread?

Don't rise to the bait. He's a decent poster in TFR, but likes to give the regulars the needle from time to time. In other words, he's just fuckin' with ya.

Bad: Every goddamn movie that shows sniping, especially the ones that show the Carlos Hathcock "shot the other sniper through the scope" shot.

Good: poo poo, I can't think of lots of good sniper scenes, but the Generation Kill stuff seemed reasonable to me. Some folks with 75% reliability to me tell me that the stuff in the sniper training scenes in Jarhead are reasonably accurate.

NosmoKing fucked around with this message at 23:08 on May 18, 2010

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Mr. 47 posted:

Yeah, I still feel that the series would be better if they just strung together all the nudity in one twenty-minute DVD.

That's why they invented the fast forward key and the "next scene" key on your DVD player.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Absolut_Zero posted:

I just kind of suspended disbelief in this scene - it was more about the character development than the shooting.

Yes, I know, I'm a terrible TFR goon for having said that.

I'll give Hurt Locker guy sniper a "lucky shot" for the running guy. I'll even give ya the misses and "realism" in that at least the EOD guy on the rifle wasn't magically able to hit his targets every time he fired. What got to me is that they didn't have him miss, they had him miss. When he misses, he's hitting the opposite side of the building, not just near the window where the enemy sniper is sitting in plain view.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Bad: Person takes a shot to the center of mass of the head with a no-kidding around centerfire round like a .308, .30-06, or perhaps a close in shotgun-to-the-face. Even better are the suicides where a gun sticks one of the aformentioned chambered long arms under his chin and pulls the trigger. There's a splat of blood behind them and a neat hole in the front of the forehead (always the forehead even if they are running sideways across an opening, see "Enemy At The Gates").

Good: shots that show decapitation from hits like this or at least really, really big hunks of head going missing. If you put a shotgun under your chin and point it at the crown of your head and pull the trigger with your toe, you will remove everything north of the upper half of your eyesockets , around back to rear skull suture joints and deposit it on the ceiling.

Seen in a few horror movies, but only for special "wow" special-effects scenes. I can't recall seeing it in a military movie that I can recall.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

priznat posted:

Dr. Strangelove

Good: Everything



Good: B-52 done so well that the USAF questioned the production staff on how they knew so much about the layout of the interior of the bomber.

Bad: The shadow on the ground is the shadow of a B-17, not a B-52.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

The Automator posted:

I would be PISSED if The A-Team had realistic gunplay.

Yes, but does corrugated sheet metal still repel 5.56 and better fire (with sparky ricochet effect)???

If not, I want my money back RIGHT loving NOW!

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Good:

Back to No Country for a bit. When Anton busts into the Mexican's room, he shoots the guy on the bed in the arm first with the shotgun. Look closely and note that he blows the arm about 3/4 of the way off at the forearm. The hand and remaining arm in front of the shotgun wound flops downward.

Gross and great at the same time.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

mlmp08 posted:

This could be a good PSA.

"Hi, I'm Jack Bauer, and I think it's important that young adult girls know to listen to their fathers or they will get stolen and/or raped. See, your dad isn't some special agent. If you went missing, he'd call the cops. And then that cop's shift would end and some details would get lost, and Jeff was supposed to take down all the info, but it's his week with the kids and there was a triple-homicide on the South Side last night and so his Lieutenant passed half the work to Samantha, and she means well, but she's a rookie without a lot of--

Oh, where was I? I'm not sure. But I know where you are. Raped and dead.

Listen to your dad."

I have 3 girls. I'm lobbying to have this psa made tomorrow.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Rollin' with the derail.

My gun nightmares:

Have gun, no ammo or ammo isn't where it should be. Frantic quest for ammo for the gun results.

Have ammo, and know you own the gun, but can't get to the gun.

Gun won't work. Have all components, but poo poo won't go BANG when asked.

Wost: Have guns, have ammo, everything works, but impacts in obviously fatal areas do exactly zero. Shooting the bad guys does loving nothing.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

The best firearms related dreams are the ones where someone gives you a loving warehouse full of all the poo poo you ever wanted.

The bad part comes when you wake up and realize it was all a dream.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Cyrano4747 posted:

Yeah, I know what you mean. I've been on a HUGE Miami Vice kick and not only is the firearms handling pretty well done, but the people actually seem relaxed and confident with them. I think part of it might have to do with the lesser number of actors these days who have ever held a gun off-set.

Two actors I can think of off the top of my head today who seem pretty chill and relaxed when gun stuff comes up are Leonardo Decaprio and that guy who used to be on That 70s Show who's a bit of a RL gun nut.

Yeah, but it went to poo poo when they dropped the Bren Ten for that S&W hunk of poo poo for Sonny's gun.

My favorite scenes from the old TV show were Sonny's "maybe you won't even twitch" incident with the kid hostage and "SURF'S UP PAL!" with the Soviet undercover agent.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

gauss posted:

^^man I need to watch Unforgiven again, it's been too long.

I have been pushing this film pretty hard recently, but I find it hard not to since I enjoyed it so much. Lackluster reviews when it came out made me not look for it, which is a shame. It's all about soldiers remembering their part in the 1982 Lebanon War, which the protagonist (and filmmaker) has repressed.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylzO9vbEpPg

Despite going with animation to get around the practical problem of having no footage, the film is far better for it. I think it's a big recommendation for TFR because some people will accuse the film of being "talky," but anyone who really enjoys oral history accounts of war I think will enjoy it. Also the Galils are well drawn?

It's talky as gently caress, but a good movie regardless. It's one of those films that does a good job of illustrating the "war is long periods of boredom punctuated by moments of stark terror" concept and it explores areas of "I'm a conscript and don't actually want to be here", "Why are we even DOING this", PTSD, horrible military mistakes (or people snapping from constant attacks from unseen enemy and striking out at civilians depending on what side you listen to), and other complex issues of sending people off to fight.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

priznat posted:

Anyone catch last week's "Sons of Anarchy"? Just wondering if a hunting rifle (looked centerfire of some kind) from about 10 feet would just put a small hole in the back of someone's shoulder and not pass through, with not much in the way of ill effects other than pulling out the slug and covering it with a gauze patch. I am not a doctor!

Shoulder as in deltoid or shoulder as in shoulder blade?

Anything that's a decent "deer rifle" (.243 on the small end, .300 win mag or so on the big end) would gently caress YOU UP if shot in either location, especially since 90% of the commercially available ammo for those types of rounds are designed to expand readily on medium sized thin skinned game (like you).

Shot through the deltoid muscle, I would expect most of the deltoid to be missing post impact. Shot in the shoulder blade area, I would expect you to be deader-n-poo poo. That's the top of your lungs. Exactly where those type of projectiles and rounds are made to release maximum homogenizing power and turn lungs from pink puffy air intake organs to pulverized red jello.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Pitch posted:

It's not very realistic but as a movie cliche it's older than you are.

Not silver dollars unless you're shooting a 2 gauge. Dimes fit in a 12 gauge.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Not Nipsy Russell posted:

Every time I see Dame Helen Mirren do the HK slap in the commercial, I get all tingly.


I would give her the most disappointing 90 seconds of her life. That's a GMIFL for sure.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Cyrano4747 posted:

Don't gently caress around with blanks, kids.

Just ask Jon-Eric Hexum!

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

2pint posted:

And Brandon Lee...

Yeah, I was going to put him in there, but he's more of a case of tragic accident on the set rather than "goofing around with 'just blanks' and killed himself".

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

NerdyMcNerdNerd posted:

Well, yeah. But it would have made more sense if he did more than get beat to poo poo and dragged around by the interesting characters. It really felt like he was the side plot, and they were the focus, but somewhere someone hosed up the script or something. He didn't even really evolve that much or do anything the entire movie, except where he suddenly got 'good' for five seconds at the very end to save Hit Girl.

The previews failed to convey the movie well, but I ended up enjoying it in spite of a drab, uninteresting main character. It's kind of sad when the title character is so pathetic that every other important character is more interesting.

I watched Kick-rear end wanting it to be fun gun porn and improbable gun-kata and ended up seeing a sad, sad movie.

Nobody else thought it was horribly depressing?

Kick rear end gets his poo poo handed to him 99% of the time. The backstory about Hit Girl and Big Daddy. The whole scene where Big Daddy's ex-partner questions what the hell he's doing to himself and his little girl. The way red mist gets manipulated. What happens to Big Daddy. The Hit Girl climax sequence where she has tears in her eyes the whole time.

I wanted to loving cry.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Cyrano4747 posted:

Hah, yeah. THe only thing that I get mild culture shock over in Germany anymore is the total inversion of the swearing/sex vs. violence metric.

C Loo Green's "gently caress You" is playing on the radio pretty much 24/7 out here and the music video is on all the local MTV analogs. People don't even blink. Tits on an advertisement, while not everywhere, certainly aren't unheard of, and I've seen some badly-hidden shadowy dong on a billboard before. A not insignificant number of the straight vanilla broadcast networks go over to softcore porno past about 2am. Half the time it's actually hardcore that they've just cropped or edited to keep tits and rear end but obscure/remove the straight up penetration.

But god loving help you if you want to play a video game where people bleed when you shoot them. A huge chunk of the computer gamers out here order the Austrian or UK versions via Amazon because they want to be able to see people bleed, blow off limbs, whatever.

One of George Carlin's best comedy bits is where he explains how (in the spirit of "I'd rather have my kids watch a movie of two people making love than two people trying to kill each other") he'd like to switch the work "gently caress" for the word "kill" in old movies.

"Alright Sherrif, we're gonna gently caress ya now. But we're gonna gently caress ya slow."

I miss you, George.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

iyaayas01 posted:



Other than that little nitpicking detail, that little event sounds loving awesome.


Were these all History scholars? If so, this is the best idea I've ever heard.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Rodrigo Diaz posted:

Also Red Dawn is terrible.

You'd better have gone through puberty after the fall of the EVIL SOVIET EMPIRE. If you did, you are OK to have this opinion.

If you were in your teens in the 80's and you have this opinion, you are completely wrong.

I have Red Dawn on DVD AND on VHS.

Every year we gather at my friends hunting cabin for a bullshit/drink/shoot stuff weekend and one of the main events is getting out several AK pattern rifles, magdumping them at poo poo on the side of the hill we use as a backstop, and screaming "WOLVERINES!!!" at the top of our lungs.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Rodrigo Diaz posted:

I sure did. It's still a bad film.

Look at you.

Look at how wrong you are right now.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

You will remove this 80's "teens can beat the Soviet army" mastrubatory fantasy from my mind with your "logic" and "facts" no sooner than you will remove my 80's fantasy of the hot big-titted neighbor mom inviting me into her house after mowing her lawn for a shower together and a soapy titwank prior to her handing me the $20 for the lawnmowing job.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

InterwebzRN posted:

Indeed they are. I wasn't paying attention. Good catch! I will now go self-flagellate.

I self-flagellate all the time.

I favor a water-based lubricant.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

NerdyMcNerdNerd posted:

There is another season coming in July. It's one of the only television shows I watch anymore, a shining gem of quality in a desolate wasteland of mediocrity and poo poo. I have over a hundred channels and watch about three or four shows.

I don't pay for TV, over the air only.

I netflix the poo poo out of stuff if I hear it's good.

Saves lots of $$$, but I'm a year behind in my TV watching by default.

Oh well.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Cyrano4747 posted:

I like you. You have the same cheap-rear end-grandpa TV habits that I do. Speaking of which, check out The Tudors if you haven't already. It's full of history. History and really awesome ~~TITTAYS~~

Grandpa still likes ~TITTAYS~ for sure. Time to get that series in the lineup.


NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Cyrano4747 posted:


Also, I may be pissing my wife off with using "Fill your hands, you sonofabitch!" as my standard answer for just about anything.

That's what ya say to her as you walk up to her while you're naked, sporting a throbber.

Could make for a fun evening.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

CougarsWrath posted:

I finally started watching miami vice, and at the end of episode two rico gets at least seven shots out of his wheelgun




You won't convince me that Miami Vice is anything other than one of the greatest television shows EVER.

Especially with the Bren Ten.

"SURF'S UP PAL!!'

"Maybe you won't
even
twitch...

BOOM!"

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Just watched The Expendables (yes, I know I'm awfully late to that party) and was concerned with the amount of teacupping and wrist holding with the pistol scenes.

I did like Stallone's speed reloads with the 1911 though, that was pretty slick.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

King Carnivore posted:

UPDATE: The Walking Dead is still complete poo poo

I watched the first season on DVD and was like "eh", but I guess I'll pass on the follow up stuff.

I buy the trade paperback compilations every year with an Amazon gift card that my sister sends me for Christmas. Always the same gift card, always buy the same gift.

I really need to upgrade my TV. I've got a 27" cathode ray tube TV from around 1992. They have re-formatted the viewing area for broadcast TV since the change to digital and the edges of the image are simply cut off on my wrong aspect ratio TV.

Really figured it out when I was watching the news one night and noted that the anchor to the right was cut in half.

poo poo, time to ditch the old oak entertainment center and get something new.

Great, right after I bought a new oven, new refrigerator/freezer, new central AC unit, new hot water heater, and new furnace.

Sure, I gots extra money for TV...

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Remulak posted:

Sudden Impact is an attempt to fuse a DH movie with modern Noir. As such it *almost* works. Dead Pool is a movie whose best performance comes from the casting director, who nabbed the then-unknown Jim Carrey and Liam Neeson. It's otherwise TERRIBLE, and I saw it in the goddamn theater.

Come on, Jim Carry lip sinc-ing to Guns and Roses was painfully awesome.

Using the harpoon gun (that had previously been fired by the real GnR in a camo) at the end was great.

The films became self-parody, but may as well have the last one be so goddamn over the top that the only step up from there was to turn Dirty Harry into McBain or Judge Dredd.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

I like turtles posted:

Is that what we're calling it nowdays?

I have the 8 3/8" barrel myself...

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Raptor1033 posted:

Downfall is ... bleak. You may want a kitten on-hand to bring you out of the immediate depression you'll go in to.


How good a movie is Downfall? It's so good, you feel bad for Hitler. You're watching this movie and you feel bad for this old man who's plans are coming apart at the seams.

Then you snap out of it and remind yourself it's loving HITLER!

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Insane Totoro posted:

Honestly, Perfect Blue and anything else by the director Satoshi Kon is more artsy-fartsy to a fault than "anime."

One of the war movies that profoundly disturbed me recently was "The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas." Probably the last Holocaust movie I will watch for a very long time.

The Japanese movie "Yamato" was interesting. Sort of comparable to Pearl Harbor in terms of cost and marketing. I liked how they made a detailed replica of the AAA batteries.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yamato_
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q4QWqDTCk2A (trailer)

Boy in the Striped Pajamas is pretty heartbreaking.

Fond of "When The Wind Blows" and "Testament" for my "everyone slowly dies of radiation poisoning after nuclear exchange" movies. Both will make you cry like a lil' bitch.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Raptor1033 posted:

They might as well just rename all the characters with anglo names if they're going to have an all white cast.

http://youtu.be/jafd97yJFOI


Yeah, like this.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Sperglord Actual posted:

Counterpoint: being stalked by fangirls who want you to literally suck their blood.

Counter- Counterpoint: Being stalked by MILF's who want to literally suck you balls.

NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

Capn Beeb posted:

I really miss JAMES DOAKES. I haven't even finished the last season of Dexter, I just stopped caring.

Same for Weeds. The first... three seasons? I think it was three. Those were the best since the show was still about a mom selling weed in the suburbs to keep her family afloat. Then poo poo got ridiculous and they fled town after burning their house down during a wildfire and it basically become an endless loop of Nancy loving her way out of bad situations, which leads her to even worse situations she must gently caress her way out of.

Which is especially stupid considering the creator is all WOMYN EMPOWERMENT YA'LL

poo poo, I stopped watching after season 2. Now you're going to make me watch the rest of it. GO WOMYN!

Vaginas are powerful things

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NosmoKing
Nov 12, 2004

I have a rifle and a frying pan and I know how to use them

I just watched (really, fast forwarded through) Sucker Punch

I don't know how awful things have to get to make a guy yell at the TV, but Sucker Punch did it for me.

What the gently caress, Zack?

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