SHAMEFUL: The greatest movies you've never seen

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > Cinema Discusso > SHAMEFUL: The greatest movies you've never seen

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

The Machine: You get...Se7en. It's one of the best films about the evershifting concept of evil ever written, and has an absolutely gut-wrenching conclusion.

1. Persona: Everything about this film sounds fascinating. In the last year, I watched my first two Bergman films -- Wild Strawberries and The Seventh Seal -- and, like everyone else, recognized them as masterpieces. So why haven't I seen it? It's inexplicable. I've Netflixed it at least three times, and always returned it, not being "in the mood." In the mood for what? I don't mind subtitles, I like Bergman and everyone says it's incredible.

2. Casablanca: I was sick the week they showed this in film class. It was my Dad's favorite movie, and since he passed away recently, one would think I'd honor his memory by giving it a watch. One would be wrong. Always intend to see it, always forget to add it to my queue.

3. Berlin Alexanderplatz: It's sixteen hours long. I mean, what the gently caress? It would be my first Fassbinder film, and considering it's still shorter than the average season of American television, it shouldn't be this loving daunting...but it is.

4. Mean Streets: Once you've seen Taxi Driver, Raging Bull, GoodFellas, The Gangs of New York, After Hours and The Departed, why bother watching Mean Streets? No matter how many people tell me it's a flawed masterpiece, I've just never gathered up the desire to rent it.

5. Barry Lyndon or any Kubrick films made prior to 2001: A Space Odyssey: Same bullshit minor-masterpiece excuse. Kill me.

6. Any Hitchcock movie outside of Vertigo, Psycho and The Birds: Always meant to, haven't yet.

7. Any movies made before 1950, with a few exceptions: I've seen Metropolis, The Wizard of Oz, A Trip to the Moon, The Great Train Robbery, maybe a few others and assorted experimental shorts. I always promise myself I'm starting with recent history and working my way backwards, but I'm very myopic with a bias against the distant past when I'm front-loading my Netflix queue. This isn't really much of an excuse either, since I find time to watch a lot of third-rate thrillers and horror flicks.

8. Touch of Evil: We watched the brilliant opening shot in film class, but apparently Professor Hoity-Toity didn't think the rest of the film was as good. Keep meaning to finish it, never get around to finishing it.

9. 2 or 3 Things I Know About Her, Week-End or A Woman is a Woman: I love the few Godard films I've seen, but I always end up re-watching Breathless, Contempt or Band of Outsiders instead of trying something new. It's horrible.

10. Inland Empire: I love Lynch, but I can't stay awake for this loving movie for the life of me. I've tried everything short of pinning my eyelids open and using artificial tears.

Keanu Grieves fucked around with this message at 19:27 on Jun 1, 2010

# ¿ Jun 1, 2010 19:18

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# ¿ Apr 19, 2024 22:35

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

TonTon posted:

Bad Movie Knight, I choose Strangers on a Train for you. It was my first Hitchcock, I was 6 years old, and I still remember parts of it vividly. I can't remember much of my childhood, but I remember that movie like I saw it yesterday. also i haven't seen or heard of most of those other movies

Phew! For a second there, I was afraid the next goon would be a big Fassbinder fan.

# ¿ Jun 1, 2010 19:43

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

Skeesix posted:

Soon I'll watch Adaptation (which I know isn't regarded as great

Oh, it's great. It's really great. Someday it will be regarded as a classic.

# ¿ Jun 1, 2010 20:32

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

Peaceful Anarchy posted:

Pretty sure it already is, at least as much as any movie from this century can be.

Well, I mean the kind of classic that takes distance to appreciate. Like 100 years from now, it will still be highly regarded. Then again, so will almost anything else by Charlie Kaufman. The man's a loving genius.

# ¿ Jun 1, 2010 20:39

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

Skeesix posted:

I am shamed anew.

You can be shamed athrice: You forgot to pick a movie for the previous poster.

# ¿ Jun 1, 2010 20:43

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

thegloaming posted:

Now you too can be shamed; he did!

I am shamed afourth.

# ¿ Jun 1, 2010 20:46

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

FitFortDanga posted:

7. I Am Legend - Seems like something I wouldn't mind.

There are at least nine films on your list that you would mind less than I Am Legend. Seriously. Listen to my dad? Listen to the nerd rage, man; avoid this fucker like the plague. It's not terrible, but a man like you would find little in it to appreciate, especially with the bullshit ending. Keep in mind, this is Ben Lyons' favorite film.

And Ultimatum is the third, but it's the only bona fide masterpiece in the trilogy (although the second is pretty loving good). It's worth watching Identity/Supremacy just to get to Ultimatum.

Keanu Grieves fucked around with this message at 21:12 on Jun 1, 2010

# ¿ Jun 1, 2010 21:10

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

Sporadic posted:

Did you see the alternative ending/cut? Still not great but much better than the theatrical. Also Will Smith acted his rear end off in it. That's something to appreciate.

I rather enjoyed I Am Legend, and I don't think FFD is too artsy-fartsy to appreciate a mainstream action/horror flick, but there is very little that is artful or especially well-done about I Am Legend. Sure, it packs a poo poo-ton of jump scares into its running time, but there's little to enjoy about it beyond the occasional adrenaline rush from LOUD NOISES!

# ¿ Jun 1, 2010 21:24

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

Peaceful Anarchy posted:

Last Tango In Paris I don't know, always got the impression this would be boring, not sure why.

Whenever Marlon Brando gets a hold of some butter, it's never boring.

# ¿ Jun 1, 2010 22:11

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD posted:

The book is but the movie sure as hell isn't.

Couldn't have said it better myself. It's two hours of jump scares capped off by a retarded-rear end ending. Haven't seen the alternate ending, but it's supposed to be better.

# ¿ Jun 2, 2010 01:46

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

thegloaming posted:

also bmk you need to empty your inbox.

Man, I did this when FFD mentioned it earlier in the thread. I wonder if my PMs are broken.

# ¿ Jun 2, 2010 07:58

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

Arkane posted:

8 1/2 - Is this a musical or am I just thinking that because of the hellspawn Rob Marshall? Either way, I haven't seen it.

Not a musical but a great meditation on the confluence of life and art.

EDIT: AAAND since I just finished watching Strangers on a Train, Arkane gets 8 1/2.

Reaction to Strangers on a Train:

Strangers on a Train isn't quite on the level of Vertigo or Psycho, but it's still an entertaining, tightly wound thriller from which more than a few films have borrowed liberally (Throw Momma from the Train is the obvious, but the importance of luck and the tennis also seems to have influenced Match Point). What I appreciated most is Hitchcock's dark sense of humor -- this is a younger, more playful Hitchcock than the man who made those later masterpieces, and it shows in shots like this:

Yes, folks, that is a murder map, complete with attached front-door key. I could not stop laughing, and I'm sure Ol' Hitch would be right there with me, enjoying the delicious audacity of Bruno's gift to Guy. Also, there's a certain sort of surreal illogic at play in some of the dialogue, hinting at the police's naivete in dealing with such a diabolical plan. This won't make sense for virgins to the film, but toward the end much of the action centers on a lighter that Bruno plans to use to implicate Guy. His plan goes awry, and as he lays dying, Guy asks him to come clean and admit to police that he has the lighter. This is the dialogue exchange in all its brilliant glory:

quote:

Bruno: "(The lighter is) on the island, where you left it..."
Guy: "Chief, can't I just go through his pockets?"
Chief: "No, of course you can't. And besides, he says he doesn't have it."

That totally negates any reason Guy would have for asking to search him -- again, something I'm sure Hitchcock threw in with delight.

All in all, it's an enjoyable thriller, and the merry-go-round from Hell was a surprisingly adept piece of stunt work and choreography for a movie from this era.

So...I guess I need another movie.

bad movie knight posted:

The Machine: You get...Se7en. It's one of the best films about the evershifting concept of evil ever written, and has an absolutely gut-wrenching conclusion.

1. Persona: Everything about this film sounds fascinating. In the last year, I watched my first two Bergman films -- Wild Strawberries and The Seventh Seal -- and, like everyone else, recognized them as masterpieces. So why haven't I seen it? It's inexplicable. I've Netflixed it at least three times, and always returned it, not being "in the mood." In the mood for what? I don't mind subtitles, I like Bergman and everyone says it's incredible.

2. Casablanca: I was sick the week they showed this in film class. It was my Dad's favorite movie, and since he passed away recently, one would think I'd honor his memory by giving it a watch. One would be wrong. Always intend to see it, always forget to add it to my queue.

3. Berlin Alexanderplatz: It's sixteen hours long. I mean, what the gently caress? It would be my first Fassbinder film, and considering it's still shorter than the average season of American television, it shouldn't be this loving daunting...but it is.

4. Mean Streets: Once you've seen Taxi Driver, Raging Bull, GoodFellas, The Gangs of New York, After Hours and The Departed, why bother watching Mean Streets? No matter how many people tell me it's a flawed masterpiece, I've just never gathered up the desire to rent it.

5. Barry Lyndon or any Kubrick films made prior to 2001: A Space Odyssey: Same bullshit minor-masterpiece excuse. Kill me.

6. ~~Any Hitchcock movie outside of Vertigo, Psycho and The Birds: Always meant to, haven't yet.~~ Hmmm...well, despite my recommendation of 8 1/2 to Arkane, I still haven't seen any other Fellini films. I own La Dolce Vita, but there it sits, still in its plastic wrap a full two years after I got it as a Christmas gift.

7. Any movies made before 1950, with a few exceptions: I've seen Metropolis, The Wizard of Oz, A Trip to the Moon, The Great Train Robbery, some of the Universal monster movies, maybe a few others and assorted experimental shorts. I always promise myself I'm starting with recent history and working my way backwards, but I'm very myopic with a bias against the distant past when I'm front-loading my Netflix queue. This isn't really much of an excuse either, since I find time to watch a lot of third-rate thrillers and horror flicks.

8. Touch of Evil: We watched the brilliant opening shot in film class, but apparently Professor Hoity-Toity didn't think the rest of the film was as good. Keep meaning to finish it, never get around to finishing it.

9. 2 or 3 Things I Know About Her, Week-End or A Woman is a Woman: I love the few Godard films I've seen, but I always end up re-watching Breathless, Contempt or Band of Outsiders instead of trying something new. It's horrible.

10. Inland Empire: I love Lynch, but I can't stay awake for this loving movie for the life of me. I've tried everything short of pinning my eyelids open and using artificial tears.

Keanu Grieves fucked around with this message at 09:56 on Jun 2, 2010

# ¿ Jun 2, 2010 08:35

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

penismightier posted:

The Departed Just doesn't look that good.

You couldn't be more incorrect. Really man.

# ¿ Jun 2, 2010 21:00

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

InfiniteZero posted:

I mostly get the impression that Godard enjoys being an rear end in a top hat and luckily for him happens to be really good at it in an artistic way.

Also, he can direct the best "two characters in an apartment" scenes ever. That always helps.

# ¿ Jun 3, 2010 19:25

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

uncle jimbo posted:

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind - a friendtold me not to see it, so I didn't.

Whoever this friend was, (s)he's a bad loving person.

# ¿ Jun 4, 2010 02:48

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

Slvbarek posted:

Incidentally, I've got a Dog Day Afternoon thread incoming.

I wish they would've gone through on the trilogy idea and made Dog Day Morning and Dog Day Night. Alas, what might've been...

EDIT: Wrong thread.

# ¿ Jun 4, 2010 20:27

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

Peaceful Anarchy posted:

Well, I must say I was impressed by First Blood. It's not quite a great film but it's so much better than I expected. It's a much more thoughtful film than I would have imagined, though it certainly has more than it's share of explosions and violence, with an interesting dynamic between Rambo and the police. Rambo's disturbed combat vet aspect is really well played with a slow steady reveal of the depth of his madness and the small town police is a good foil. It gets a bit too ridiculous at times but I can forgive that.

The movie doesn't portray it as madness. I mean, he does have a PTSD moment, but he's not loony-bin crazy. It's funny how perception of this film changes over 30 years.

# ¿ Jun 4, 2010 20:58

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

Peaceful Anarchy posted:

Yeah madness is probably not the right word, but it's more than just a PTSD moment. By the time he's rigging traps in the woods and luring the police into them I'd say there's some pretty deliberate planning there and not quite sane actions. He was pushed to snap, but a lot of what follows goes beyond flashbacks and stress, and by the end he's clearly seeking conflict.

Well, he's afraid for his life. He realizes Dennehy's character is corrupt and that he has no chance of escaping unscathed. It's a larger metaphor for Vietnam vets feeling they're not welcome back into the society that deployed them, that the country changed in their absence and ridicules them for their involvement in a war that spiraled out of their control. My dad and his Vietnam buddies certainly identified with that feeling, offering First Blood high praise while constantly lambasting its sequels.

Considering my dad was an Air Force combat photographer whose only experience with combat was photographing the aftermath and the occasional brief skirmish, I don't think he was shell-shocked. In fact, his experiences upon return were far more damaging. For instance, he returned in 1968-ish and spent the better part of the '70s working menial jobs and trying to better his life; it was as if the U.S. used and discarded him. That's how John Rambo feels, and he's working to preserve the last shred of dignity and humanity he has.

Keanu Grieves fucked around with this message at 21:21 on Jun 4, 2010

# ¿ Jun 4, 2010 21:17

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

LesterGroans posted:

It's better to get this one out of the way, plus if the next one picked for you isn't Aguirre I'll eat my hat

"LesterGroans Eats His Hat," a film by Les Blank.

# ¿ Jun 8, 2010 01:48

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

Peaceful Anarchy posted:

I hope whoever recommends thegloaming's next movie reads that post and picks something else.

Now we just gotta dig up Les Blank's corpse.

# ¿ Jun 8, 2010 02:01

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

LesterGroans posted:

Mod, requesting a name change to LesterBlanks...also, I'll need a hat. Preferably a delicious one.

I would suggest you get your order in for a hat-shaped cake.

# ¿ Jun 8, 2010 02:08

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

thegloaming posted:

Actually I've already seen The 400 Blows

And it's times like this I wish I had more Netflix slots

Funny: Netflix wishes you had more slots too. Time for an upgrade?

# ¿ Jun 8, 2010 17:48

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

LesterGroans posted:

Netflix sounds like a dirty old man and I'm glad* I don't have it

*am not glad

Netflix is a dirty old man. In fact, just yesterday Netflix predicted I'd give the candy in its front pocket five stars.

I only gave it one because it spat at me.

# ¿ Jun 8, 2010 19:30

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

John Landis: An American rear end in a top hat in Burbank

John Landis: The Kentucky Fried Children

John Landis: Beverly Hills Crook III (with three times the casualties!)

Keanu Grieves fucked around with this message at 04:17 on Jun 17, 2010

# ¿ Jun 17, 2010 04:14

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

I love Shakespeare in Love.

# ¿ Jun 20, 2010 05:02

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

Why hadn't I heard about Shoah before? Jesus loving Christ. :cry:

# ¿ Jul 15, 2010 22:58

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

Skutter posted:

I never found it intense or suspenseful at all. I actually started laughing when Jimmy Stewart was trying to blind the guy with the flash bulbs as a way to hold him off until the police arrived. All the guy had to do was close his eyes and just walk over to the wheelchair and he would've been fine. And trying to throw him out the window? Come on, it was the second story and the worst that could've happened did, which was Stewart breaking his other leg. I was expecting a lot out of it because I enjoyed Psycho and I know that Hitchcock is supposed to be the master of suspense and twists. I was really disappointed by the whole story because it was obvious that the guy killed his wife all along, it was just a matter of getting some evidence. vv

I think the problem is its imitators have ruined Rear Window for you. Rear Window is fantastic, if you try to put yourself in that 1950s seeing-this-for-the-first-time mindset. Let me ask you something: Didn't you find the subplot about Grace Kelly trying to prove to her boyfriend that she was a sissy by putting herself in increasingly dangerous situations tragic? No modern woman would do that, but I'd like to think Hitch (and his screenwriter) intentionally wove in subversive feminist commentary.

In fact, without that subplot, I can't imagine how Rear Window would work, which makes me wonder how the Christopher Reeve remake handles it.

# ¿ Aug 12, 2010 00:28

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# ¿ Apr 19, 2024 22:35

Keanu Grieves: Dec 30, 2002

Skutter posted:

I didn't find it tragic. I thought it was great that he included that in his writing. It was very different for the times, which I can appreciate. Especially the fact that he had her and the nurse climb a fence while wearing dresses, had them digging around in a garden for a dead body and then had Kelly climb up the side of a building and break into the killer's apartment. Crazy for the times. It's funny you mention all that because I was talking about that with my husband last night (seeing it all before so you don't enjoy the original) and I don't think that has anything to do with it. I can appreciate the old stuff just as well as the new; I just didn't like the movie.

Well, fair's fair. I certainly don't like 100% of the IMDb Top 250.

# ¿ Aug 12, 2010 00:41

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