code:

#!/usr/bin/perl

use strict;
use HTTP::Request;
use HTTP::Response;
use LWP::Simple;
use LWP::UserAgent;

#default phrase to look for
my $goonPhrase = "welp";
my $URL = "http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3343753&pagenumber=";

printf("Searching FBI database for $goonPhrase\n");

my $ua = LWP::UserAgent->new();
$ua->timeout(60);


for ($i = 1; $i < 50; $i++) {
my $uaRequest = HTTP::Request->new(GET => "$URL" + "$i");
my $uaResponse = $ua->request($uaRequest);

if ($uaResponse->is_error()) {
        printf("Formatting drive C: %s", $uaResponse->status_line);
        die;
}

my $pageContents = $uaResponse->content();
my @pageLines = split(/\n/, $pageContents);

foreach my $line (@pageLines) {
        if ($line =~ /$goonPhrase/) {
              #magic happens here, count your phrases, do whatever
              #per-line count basis, multiple phrases same line count as 1
        }
}
}