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I found Jay Dub's comparison of The American to Eat, Pray, Love to be accurate, considering that I almost saw the latter but ended up with the former on my recent movie date. Turns out that I was taking the same pill. That's not a knock against The American either, as I did like it and so did my date.
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Sep 7, 2010 01:39
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Wow, you weren't joking around in the bad greenlighted movies thread, ProfessorClumsy. I guess you really did like Skyline. Granted, you looked at it from a different lens than practically everyone else, but still. Vargo, I can't help you, sorry. Perhaps ask the good folks in CineD?
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Nov 15, 2010 10:19
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Jay Dub, it will only get worse from here. Get out while you still can.
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Dec 19, 2010 17:13
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My parents didn't like True Grit. That's not surprising with my dad, as he's typically a tough sell, but my mom usually finds movies he doesn't like to be pretty good or OK (and movies that my dad finds pretty good, she finds great). She said she couldn't understand anything Jeff Bridges said.
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Dec 28, 2010 10:35
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It's a bummer that the patron saint of CineD, Nicolas Cage, is given no opportunity to do what he does best in Season of the Witch. I hope that Drive Angry remedies this.
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Jan 10, 2011 18:25
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Vargo posted:Kevin James is to Chris Farley what Jim Belushi is to John Belushi. Every moment he spends on screen serves as a sharp painful reminder that the funny one ain't ever coming back. 
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Jan 16, 2011 19:24
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Way to go, Gnomeo & Juliet, not only did you manage to take an opportunity in the movie to slap Shakespeare in the face, you managed to take an opportunity to slap Shakespeare voiced by Patrick Stewart in the face. Unforgivable.
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Feb 14, 2011 09:09
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Jay Dub, why are you surprised that Red Riding Hood is loaded with phallic imagery? If anything, that makes it more similar to the original fairy tale than the watered-down kiddie version that we're used to.
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Mar 13, 2011 13:06
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When you get down to it, I think that Current Releases is a good fit for the SA front page because it still manages to be humorous in addition to being a good source for movie reviews, and the first thing that comes to mind when I think of SA is "humor." As for this week's batch of reviews, comparing jump scares to "FWD: FWD: FWD: SCROLL DOWN FOR SCARY!!!" emails is brilliant and I don't know why no one has made that comparison before. I was a little confused about why Insidious had a higher score than Source Code, though. Vargo said that the last part of Insidious was terrible, while ProfessorClumsy didn't seem to put the ending of Source Code on that level.
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Apr 3, 2011 09:14
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I find it commendable that Jay Dub didn't drag politics into his review. Would you say that the movie is very heavy-handed with its agenda or is it overshadowed by boredom?
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Apr 17, 2011 23:18
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I hate Twitter bots.
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May 3, 2011 01:34
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http://www.somethingawful.com/d/current-movie-reviews/priest-something-borrowed.php Why wasn't there more of a fight over who would see the movie Kate Hudson wasn't in? Also, the "Barack and Michelle Obama" comparison isn't un-PC at all.
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May 8, 2011 08:20
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ProfessorClumsy posted:Just think about this for a moment: there so many talking animal movies released on a weekly basis that we have a guy who loving specialises in reviewing them. I can't wait for the review of Zookeeper. Multiple talking animals and Kevin James will make for a great one, I'm sure.
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Jun 7, 2011 01:24
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Jay Dub, I met the perfect girl for you at the bar the other day. She doesn't like talking animals because they freak her out. Unfortunately she was engaged to the guy she was sitting next to.
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Jul 3, 2011 21:04
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I am pumped for the upcoming Zookeeper review.
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Jul 4, 2011 07:19
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Good news for Jay Dub: Zookeeper has only made $47 million worldwide so far, a far cry from its $80 million budget. My faith in humanity would be restored if the Smurfs movie wasn't guaranteed to make money hand over fist.
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Jul 17, 2011 23:03
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Schwarzwald posted:Still, there's no reason to get too upset. Who knows, the movie could be good.
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Jul 18, 2011 05:57
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quote:I think it's necessary for there to be a Freaky Friday-type film about once every two years. It's more than a trope, it's basically it's own genre by now. As a result, you don't even have to give reasons or make sense, because we basically all know whats going to happen. They all basically have the same message: "Mothers and daughters are both great in their own ways." "Single life and married life both have their advantages." Just once I'd like to see this happen to random people and have one person's life drastically improve in every way. "I was an overweight accountant from Des Moines, now I'm a pro surfer! Screw you, I'm not going back!"
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Aug 7, 2011 08:25
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Gyges posted:As a Rob Schneider movie, I assume the Hot Chick was horrible. Was there any exploration of a gender switch other than hilarious bathroom humor?
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Aug 8, 2011 04:58
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I knew that Shark Night 3D was going to be crap when the commercials ended with "Rated PG-13," as such movies that should be rated R are wont to do. But that twist is mind-numbingly awful and would have brought it down even if it had the correct rating.
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Sep 7, 2011 07:52
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quote:Looks like I spoke too soon. "Condescending to its audience" were exactly the right words to use, just not in that context. It baffles and saddens me to no end that what we have here is a film that intends to empower women and then proceeds to treat them like idiots.
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Sep 19, 2011 09:33
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The more grandiose the self-given nickname is for a columnist, the more obnoxious that he is. It fits with Mr. Movie as well as Bill Simmons ("The Sports Guy").
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Oct 9, 2011 07:34
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Was The Big Year the first negative-scored movie in the history of Current Releases?Nucular Carmul posted:My parents are so dead set against Footloose as if the very making of this movie itself is a personal insult, which almost made me want to go see it just to be subversive, but your review pushed me over the edge
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Oct 17, 2011 00:53
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BoldFrankensteinMir posted:I think the 80's are the worst era in film history.
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Oct 21, 2011 10:02
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Shoehorning a romance into a movie like In Time sounds completely unnecessary. Then again, most movie romances these days seem to be shoehorned in, from what I've seen. At least it sounds like a decent movie in spite of all the flaws Vargo points out. And it's been too long since Jay Dub has reviewed a talking animal movie. Welcome back to therapy.
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Oct 30, 2011 17:23
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I said it in CineD and I'll say it here: the first Harold and Kumar movie was not a stoner comedy, it was a buddy movie that just so happened to have weed in it. It also showed that you can make a successful movie without any of the main characters being white (save NPH). I saw Escape from Guantanamo Bay in theaters, and I couldn't tell you much of what happened in it because it has none of the charm or uniqueness of the first movie (though I do remember that Rob Corrdry was quite good in it, as he is in many of his performances). Dumb stoners will go and see the third movie blazed, and honestly, that's the condition that they should be in when they see something like this because it looks to be just as forgettable as the second movie, and lord knows it needs the enhancements. As for Tower Heist, I read the review and thought that the premise was somewhat similar to another movie starting Eddie Murphy and an uptight white guy trying to screw over the rich. That movie is Trading Places and you should watch it instead.
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Nov 6, 2011 07:54
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Well obviously you'll have to include Marmaduke in it somehow.
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Nov 11, 2011 09:25
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I'm with Vargo on this one. When you say that Condon perfectly pulls off an elaborate prank on the films target audience (I'm willing to bet that Pattinson and Kristen Stewart were in on it too), I'll take your word for it. However, Twilight fans don't see irony, even when it's explicitly spelled out to them. In that case, it's pretty much wasted. For the ten people who are willing to see it for that reason, however, they'll probably enjoy it. I won't watch it when it's in theaters because gently caress shelling out $11.75 for a ticket.
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Nov 20, 2011 09:01
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Admiral Goodenough posted:About the last release, what was the reasoning behind Ben Lyons
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Nov 20, 2011 21:16
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Jay Dub posted:[The Muppets] isn't wall-to-wall slapsticky musical nonsense like some other films currently in theaters
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Nov 27, 2011 18:44
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goatface posted:Why do the expectations for New Year's Eve end halfway through a sentence?
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Dec 11, 2011 17:19
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So let me see if I got this right: The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo movie spends a whopping 90 minutes with the libel subplot? It doesn't even qualify as a subplot in the book: it's just something that happens at the beginning to get us into the main plot, only to pop up at the end as a way to give the story closure and to remind us that it happened. Overall it takes up less than 50 pages. Also, is Rooney Mara a better Lisabeth than the actress in the Swedish version? My mom is convinced that no one can play her better than in the Swedish version.
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Dec 29, 2011 03:48
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jeremy oval office posted:No, it spends 60 minutes or so on the libel subplot/other unnecessary bullshit. The remaining 90 minutes is the movie worth seeing. jeremy oval office posted:And Rooney Mara was better IMO. Senior Woodchuck posted:It's also there to establish Blomkvist as the Heroic Investigative Journalist Of Heroism. Much in the same way that his business partner is there to establish him as The Greatest Lover In The Western World.
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Dec 31, 2011 04:29
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I gotta say that I'm swayed by Vargo's argument about Breaking Dawn Part 1 being the movie of 2011. Replace "In God We Trust" with "Why the gently caress not?" as our national motto.NutPeg posted:"Insidious is the most unique, original and affecting horror film of recent years. Unfortunately, like so many great horror films, it will probably take another twenty to thirty years before most people notice." get that OUT of my face fucked around with this message at 04:36 on Jan 2, 2012 |
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Jan 2, 2012 04:31
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As far as I'm concerned, there are only two kinds of ice hockey movies: Slap Shot and everything else. I'll stay away from Goon, which shouldn't be too hard since I haven't seen it playing anywhere. Is a review of Beneath the Darkness forthcoming?
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Jan 10, 2012 03:08
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But Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close isn't about 9/11! It even says so in the trailer!
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Jan 22, 2012 19:38
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Katherine Heigl is Jennifer Aniston on generic chick-flick actress steroids.
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Jan 30, 2012 05:56
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Up is down, left is right, a movie directed by McG is better than a movie starring Nicolas Cage. I don't know what to think.
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Feb 19, 2012 10:21
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quote:John Cho... shows up to point out how much more successful he is than anyone else
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Apr 8, 2012 22:02
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I haven't been checking Facebook this weekend that much due to hockey. Are we going to get a column this week?
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Apr 16, 2012 08:41
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