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Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...We danced the Mamushka while Nero fiddled, we danced the Mamushka at Waterloo. We danced the Mamushka for Jack the Ripper, and now, Fester Addams, this Mamushka is for you....
Yeah, I like this mission too. I was a bit leery at first since it seemed so static, but it has turned out to be really fun.

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anakha
Sep 16, 2009


Part of it I think is that the primary objective is achievable enough that the players can get a bit creative with how they want to go after the secondaries.

Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...We danced the Mamushka while Nero fiddled, we danced the Mamushka at Waterloo. We danced the Mamushka for Jack the Ripper, and now, Fester Addams, this Mamushka is for you....
Sent in my orders. I'm jumping to 1630 and doing called shots at the immobilized Brutus with the Snake as a contingency target.

Synthbuttrange
May 6, 2007

We will teach you the word... THROUGH INTERPRETATIVE DANCE.

Endomorphic
Jul 25, 2010

SynthOrange posted:

We will teach you the word... THROUGH INTERPRETATIVE DANCE.
As long as this gig has pyrotechnics, that will be acceptable. And yes, shooting lightning counts as pyrotechnics within the context of this Interpretive Dance.

Soup Inspector
Jun 5, 2013

SynthOrange posted:

We will teach you the word... THROUGH INTERPRETATIVE DANCE.

I now have the strangest urge to imagine BattleTech: The Musical.

shalafi4
Feb 20, 2011

another medical bills avatar

Soup Inspector posted:

I now have the strangest urge to imagine BattleTech: The Musical.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wtRbByOo4Qc

PoptartsNinja
May 9, 2008

He is still almost definitely not a spy


Soiled Meat
I am the very model of a Steiner social General,
I've strategies and tactics that are very theoretical,
I know the Archon's cousin, we met while on a sabattical,
And I think all that translates to experience most practical.

PoptartsNinja fucked around with this message at 00:10 on Oct 14, 2015

TheParadigm
Dec 10, 2009

Soup Inspector posted:

I now have the strangest urge to imagine BattleTech: The Musical.

There's a system for that. Dunno how good it is, but it exists.

I suppose what I am asking is: Hogarth 2?

Pussy Cartel
Jun 26, 2011



Lipstick Apathy

PoptartsNinja posted:

I am the very model of a Steiner social General,
I've strategies and tactics that are very theoretical,
I know the Archon's cousin, we met while on a sabattical,
And I think all that translates to experience that is practical.

Beautiful. :golfclap:

AJ_Impy
Jun 17, 2007

SWORD OF SMATTAS. CAN YOU NOT HEAR A WORLD CRY OUT FOR JUSTICE? WHEN WILL YOU DELIVER IT?
Yam Slacker
With cat-like tread, *STOMP*
Upon our prey we steal; *STOMP*
Void Sig is on, *STOMP*
Their sensors cannot deal. *STOMP*
No sound at all! *STOMP*
We maintain radio silence; *STOMP*
A Flea's DFA *STOMP*
Would start a lot of violence... *STOMP*

Devorum
Jul 30, 2005

I'm about to submit my orders. I'm heading into the 'Mechbay to get a reload. Looks like I just need to head to hex 1030 inside the bulding?

Gwaihir
Dec 8, 2009
Hair Elf
I'd just grab confirmation from PTN on exactly how the reloads work (aka do you have to enter the mechbay this turn, then spend the following turn in it to get a reload?), but yea I think that's a decent enough plan this turn. You get a tiny bit of armor patched up too.

DivineCoffeeBinge
Mar 3, 2011

Spider-Man's Amazing Construction Company
Do you hear the Mariks sing?
Singing the song of angry men
It is the music of a people who
Will not agree again
When the beating of your heart
Belies the polls you must unskew
There is a life about to start
When you shout-- NO YOU

PoptartsNinja
May 9, 2008

He is still almost definitely not a spy


Soiled Meat

Gwaihir posted:

I'd just grab confirmation from PTN on exactly how the reloads work (aka do you have to enter the mechbay this turn, then spend the following turn in it to get a reload?), but yea I think that's a decent enough plan this turn. You get a tiny bit of armor patched up too.

Normally, if it were a tabletop game with one person controlling multiple machines I'd say 'spend a full turn inside to reload/rearm' but that's boring so yeah. Move in, give up your shooting phase for this turn, move out next turn.

lilljonas
May 6, 2007

We got crabs? We got crabs!
When the clanners bare their steel

GOONSQUAD: Tarantara! tarantara!

We uncomfortable feel,

GOONSQUAD: Tarantara!

And we find the wisest thing,

GOONSQUAD: Tarantara! tarantara!

Is to slap our chests and sing,

GOONSQUAD: Tarantara!

For when the AC 20 shoots,

GOONSQUAD: Tarantara! tarantara!

And your heart is in your boots,

GOONSQUAD: Tarantara!

And just nothing gets you down
Like the back-seat driver's frown,
Like the back-seat driver's frown

GOONSQUAD: Tarantara! tarantara!

POPTARTSNINJA: Go, ye heroes, go to glory,
Though you die in combat gory,
Ye shall live in song and story.
Go to immortality!
Go to death, and go to slaughter;
Die, and every Let's play daughter
With her tears your grave shall water.
Go, ye heroes, go and die!

Psion
Dec 13, 2002

eVeN I KnOw wHaT CoRnEr gAs iS
I've seen a lot of thread derails in my day and this one is excellent :allears:

PoptartsNinja
May 9, 2008

He is still almost definitely not a spy


Soiled Meat
Well, that may be the most BattleTech fall since the Wolfhound broke its own leg back in mission 1.

Theantero
Nov 6, 2011

...We danced the Mamushka while Nero fiddled, we danced the Mamushka at Waterloo. We danced the Mamushka for Jack the Ripper, and now, Fester Addams, this Mamushka is for you....
Hahahahah :shepicide:

Technowolf
Nov 4, 2009




The Snake pulled the football out didn't it.

Good Grief.

Artificer
Apr 8, 2010

You're going to try ponies and you're. Going. To. LOVE. ME!!
Hahahahah oh man this is gonna be bad.

W.T. Fits
Apr 21, 2010

Ready to Poyozo Dance all over your face.

PoptartsNinja posted:

Well, that may be the most BattleTech fall since the Wolfhound broke its own leg back in mission 1.

Mission 3, actually.

Gwaihir
Dec 8, 2009
Hair Elf

Don't panic too badly, it might have been an enemy unit :ohdear:

Pooncha
Feb 15, 2014

Making the impossible possumable
:f5:

Either way, this will be a thing of beauty.

SIGSEGV
Nov 4, 2010


Actually it was the fourth head hit in as many rounds and the pilot fainted on a 3+ and critted their leg off on the way down.

Gwaihir
Dec 8, 2009
Hair Elf

SIGSEGV posted:

Actually it was the fourth head hit in as many rounds and the pilot fainted on a 3+ and critted their leg off on the way down.

Hey, something just about this improbable happened to one of PTN's units last round! :haw:

Scintilla
Aug 24, 2010

I BEAT HIGHFORT
and all I got was this
jackass monkey
I'm guessing a unit fell over and TAC'd something explosive.

Z the IVth
Jan 28, 2009

The trouble with your "expendable machines"
Fun Shoe
Maybe the Catapult walked into the mechbay door instead of waiting for it to open first.

berryjon
May 30, 2011

I have an invasion to go to.

Z the IVth posted:

Maybe the Catapult walked into the mechbay door instead of waiting for it to open first.

Don't joke about this. I've LP'd MechCommander, and lost units to doors closing on them.

PoptartsNinja
May 9, 2008

He is still almost definitely not a spy


Soiled Meat
Laager: Tactical Update 9

It was the chance Chen Dong Chen had been waiting for: the enemy had vanished from their walls. Tattered banners bearing ComStar’s logo fluttered in the breeze and only the Catapult, leaping back to flank the Snake, exposed itself. Ivana would be breaching the front gate in moments and Chen had no desire to be mocked yet again for his machine’s lack of speed. He’d be there to support her the moment she broke into the compound, his Gauss Rifle at the enemy’s backs giving them something to think about. The walls were still too distant to leap over, but Chen Dong Chen had studied the orbital reconnaissance photos provided after a flyover by the Phoenix Project’s DropShip very closely. Lim Zhen Tu’s orders were to stay clear of the top of the wall, but by Chen’s estimation it should have been be more than wide enough at the top to accommodate a BattleMech.

He leapt. It was a risk, but Chen was experienced enough. He could always ease up on the throttle and land just outside the wall if needed. The top of the wall gleamed in soft white. He grinned, it looked more than wide enough for the Helio’s slab-shaped feet. It wasn’t until the heavy BattleMech’s “toes” touched down that Chen realized his mistake. The top of the wall was carefully painted to disguise its rounded outer edge. It ended not in a broad, flat surface but a narrow point that would’ve required a pilot of impossible skill to balance on. Chen wasn’t up to the task, his machine’s heels rolled down a surface cleverly designed to dump any would-be attackers back outside. His jets weren’t finished recharging but he feathered them anyway, spinning the Helios around to stop it from landing square on its head.

The Helios was a tough-enough design, a cruiser that shared the movement profile of the Yu Huang and Emperor “battleships” and Vindicator “destroyer escorts” it was designed to support. It had also been designed in a hurry to make use of technology stolen from the Free Worlds League, and like many first generation machines improvements would be made based on feedback from front-line pilots like Chen. Chen’s neurohelmet went silent as the Helios struck. BattleMechs were tough, even a three-story impact shouldn’t have been enough to do critical damage to one as durable as the Helios—and yet the impact had been sufficient to snap the power couplings linking the machine to its fusion engine. It was the kind of flaw only thorough testing would’ve caught. Exactly the kind of testing the Helios hadn’t undergone in the haste to get it to the front lines.








Movement Phase
BattleMaster (Player)
- Attempts to move into hex 1629, insufficient MP (needs 7, has 6)!
- - Movement ends in hex 1730!



Shooting Phase
BattleMaster (Player)
- Fires ER PPC at Brutus’s Front! No Line of Sight to target!
- Fires ER PPC at Brutus’s Front! No Line of Sight to target!
- Gains 2 heat, sinks 34

Viking (Player)
- Repairs and Rearms!
- Gains 2 heat, sinks 20

Catapult II (Player)
- Fires ER Medium Laser at Snake (4 base + 0 range + 3 movement + 3 enemy movement = 10): rolled 4, miss!
- Fires ER Medium Laser at Snake (4 base + 0 range + 3 movement + 3 enemy movement = 10): rolled 10, hit Right Arm (5/10 armor remaining)!
- Gains 14 heat, sinks 20!

Legacy (Player)
- Fires Gauss Rifle at Brutus’s Front Armor (4 base + 2 range + 3 movement - 4 enemy movement = 5): rolled 8, rolls 10 to confirm, hits Left Side (12/27 armor remaining (CfMSD))!
- Fires Gauss Rifle at Brutus’s Front Armor (4 base + 2 range + 3 movement - 4 enemy movement = 5): rolled 7, rolls 8 to confirm, hits Front (14/34 armor remaining)!
- Fires ER Medium Laser at Brutus’s Front Armor (4 base + 4 range + 3 movement - 4 enemy movement = 7): rolled 7, rolls 5 to confirm, hits Front (9/34 armor remaining (CfMSD))!
- Fires ER Medium Laser at Brutus’s Front Armor (4 base + 4 range + 3 movement - 4 enemy movement = 7): rolled 9, rolls 7 to confirm, hits Front (4/34 armor remaining)!
- Attempts to fire Streak SRM-2 at Snake, no Line of Sight to target!
- Gains 15 heat, sinks 20

“Light Autocannon” Turret 1625
- Fires TSEMP at Lao Hu (5 base + 0 range + 0 movement + 3 enemy movement = 8): rolled 5, miss!
- Fires TSEMP at Lao Hu (5 base + 0 range + 0 movement + 3 enemy movement = 8): rolled 7, miss!

“Light Autocannon” Turret 2021
- Fires TSEMP at Rifleman II (5 base + 0 range + 0 movement + 1 enemy movement = 6): rolled 7, hit!
- Fires TSEMP at Rifleman II (5 base + 0 range + 0 movement + 1 enemy movement = 6): rolled 8, hit!

Lao Hu
- Holds fire!
- Gains 2 heat, sinks 20!

Archer
- Fires Artemis LRM-15 at Catapult II (4 base + 2 range + 2 movement + 2 enemy movement = 10): rolled 5, miss!
- Fires Artemis LRM-15 at Catapult II (4 base + 2 range + 2 movement + 2 enemy movement = 10): rolled 6, miss!
Gains 14 heat, sinks 24!

Rifleman II
- Reverses arms!
- Fires Large Laser at Turret 2021 (4 base + 0 range + 2 movement - 4 enemy movement = 2): automatic hit, Turret (7/15 armor remaining)!
- Fires Large Laser at Turret 2021 (4 base + 0 range + 2 movement - 4 enemy movement = 2): automatic hit, Rear (7/15 armor remaining)!
- Fires LB 10-X Autocannon (Slug) at Turret 2021 (4 base + 0 range + 2 movement - 4 enemy movement = 2): automatic hit, Rear (0/15 armor, 0/2 structure remaining)! Turret destroyed!
- Fires LB 10-X Autocannon (Slug) at Turret 2021 (4 base + 0 range + 2 movement - 4 enemy movement = 2): automatic hit, Rear!
- Gains 22 heat, sinks 28!

Huron Warrior
- Fires Gauss Rifle at Turret 1625 (4 base + 0 range + 2 movement - 4 enemy movement = 2): automatic hit, Left Side (0/15 armor remaining)!
- Fires Medium Pulse Laser at Turret 1625 (4 base + 4 range + 2 movement - 4 enemy movement - 2 pulse laser= 4): rolled 10, hit Left Side (0/2 structure remaining)! Turret destroyed!
- Gains 7 heat, sinks 11!

Snake
- Torso-twists to threaten hex 1130!
- Fires LB-10X Autocannon (Cluster) at Catapult II (4 base + 0 range + 3 movement + 3 enemy movement - 1 Cluster = 9): rolled 7, miss!
- Gains 7 heat, sinks 22!

Helios
- Holds fire!
- Gains 4 heat, sinks 20!

Wolverine
- Holds fire!
- Gained 2 heat, sinks 24!

Brutus
- Fires Large Laser at Legacy (4 base + 4 range + 0 movement + 2 enemy movement = 10): rolled 7, miss!
- Fires Large Laser at Legacy (4 base + 4 range + 0 movement + 2 enemy movement = 10): rolled 9, miss!
- Fires LRM-20 at Legacy (4 base + 2 range + 0 movement + 2 enemy movement = 8): rolled 10, 6 missiles hit Right Torso (21/27 armor remaining), Left Torso (1/27 armor remaining)!

Brutus (PPC)
- Fires PPC at Catapult II (4 base + 2 range + 2 movement + 2 enemy movement = 10): rolled 3, miss!
- Fires PPC at Catapult II (4 base + 2 range + 2 movement + 2 enemy movement = 10): rolled 8, miss!

Demolisher (Gauss)
- Fires Gauss Rifle at Catapult II (4 base + 2 range + 1 movement + 2 enemy movement = 9): rolled 11, hit Left Leg (5/20 armor remaining)!
- Fires Gauss Rifle at Catapult II (4 base + 2 range + 1 movement + 2 enemy movement = 9): rolled 8, miss!



End Phase
Rifleman II
- Chance to Shut Down: rolled 5, no effect!
- Chance to Shut Down: rolled (10 + 1 second hit = 11), shuts down!



Physical Combat Phase:
Catapult II (Player)
- Kicks Snake (4 base + 3 movement + 3 enemy movement - 2 kick = 8): rolled 8, hit Left Leg (2/16 armor remaining)!



End Phase:
Snake
- Must pass a piloting test or fall (4 base + 0 kicked = 4): rolled 11, succeeds!



Turn End Phase:



Next Turn’s Movement Phase
Wolverine
- Activates MASC!

Helios
- Attempts to jump into hex 2128, but the landing is impossible!
- - Automatic fall into hex 2227 facing hex 2327!
- Suffers 18 damage in the fall to Right Leg (10/15 armor remaining), Center Torso (17/22 armor remaining (TAC!)), Right Torso (13/18 armor remaining), Left Arm (12/15 armor remaining)!
- Attempts to avoid pilot damage (4 base + 2 avoiding damage = 6): rolled 7, succeeds!
- Through-armor critical chance in Center Torso! 3 critical hits sustained!
- - Engine hit!
- - Engine hit!
- - Engine destroyed! `Mech destroyed!








Player Status:




Allied Status




Opposing Force Status:




Mission Objective:
- Hurt them (complete)
- - Hurt them more (3/6)
- - - Teach them the Word (3/9)

Secondary Objectives:
- Defend the Turret Control Tower (0/1)
- Defend the Administration Building (0/1)
- Keep enemy `Mechs out of the `Mechbay (0/1)



Special Rules:
Construction Zones – Unless the hex states otherwise, all construction zones count as light woods.

Reload Point – ComStar’s technicians are very motivated and have six tons of LRM reloads available. They can reload 2 tons of LRM ammo per turn spent inside the Mechbay. The Legacy isn’t built for quick reloads, but the technicians may be able to supply it with one additional ton of gauss rifle ammo. If only one `Mech is in the Mechbay the technicians will also replace damaged armor plates, restoring the armor on all damaged sections up to the nearest multiple of 5. If a section is already at a multiple of five, its armor cannot be restored.

Hidden Assets – The light autocannon turrets are currently in low-power standby mode. ComStar has always maintained up rumors that the power grid supporting them is incomplete or somehow insufficient to power them. They will not open fire until at least two players request their activation on the same turn. This deception may be detected by enemy units with a Beagle Active Probe.



Orders Due: Midnight Saturday!

Scintilla
Aug 24, 2010

I BEAT HIGHFORT
and all I got was this
jackass monkey
Bwahaha.

W.T. Fits
Apr 21, 2010

Ready to Poyozo Dance all over your face.
Beautiful. :allears:

Pooncha
Feb 15, 2014

Making the impossible possumable
:laffo:

Battletech. :allears:

Endomorphic
Jul 25, 2010

Z the IVth posted:

Maybe the Catapult walked into the mechbay door instead of waiting for it to open first.
It's also reloading in there right? So I'm imagining something like this but with LRMs (the guy does get out and walks away):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oyLN5lOYk1c&t=3m56s


Fake edit: when you find the link you want for youtube but find that PTN has already posted the actual update when you preview to check the link works :/

legoman727
Mar 13, 2010

by exmarx
Was that Helios completely pristine before the failed jump? Because AHAHAHA.

goatface
Dec 5, 2007

I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.


Grimey Drawer
What the poo poo is that thing in 1401?

Night10194
Feb 13, 2012

We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.

That was goddamn amazing.

goatface
Dec 5, 2007

I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.


Grimey Drawer
Also, did those CfMSDs do a thing?

PoptartsNinja
May 9, 2008

He is still almost definitely not a spy


Soiled Meat
It's already immobilized, motive system damage can't do anything worse to it.

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Technowolf
Nov 4, 2009




Goonlevel II MVP: walls.


I can either go after the Wolverine with 8s, continue hounding the Snake with 8s, or start on the Lao Hu with 5s. This is with ER mediums and TSEMP.

goatface posted:

What the poo poo is that thing in 1401?

Looks like a Nightstar almost. Given that green and gold, it's almost definitely Capellan.

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