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dis astranagant
Dec 14, 2006

Drink's kinda small there. I think you meant 64 oz. And 2 of them.

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Defiance Industries
Jul 22, 2010

A five-star manufacturer


paragon1 posted:

Steiner's idea of a light breakfast is a triple cheeseburger, a potatoes worth of fries, two foot-long chilli-cheese hotdogs, and a 24-ounce big gulp.

Pfft, maybe if you're some limp-wrist in the Royal Guard. In Caesar's Legion we eat the Breakfast Fortress.

NEXT LEVEL BREAKFAST MANEUVER.

Shoeless
Sep 2, 2011

BattleMaster posted:

We were bullshitting around in IRC about weird experimental tech and I ended up making this: The REAL reason the coalition had trouble kicking the Word of Blake off Terra.

(Art not mine, I GISed for UrbanMech and took the meanest looking remake I found)

Uh.... how did it get Jump 9? A mech can only have a number of JJs equal to its walk speed, or Improved JJs equal to running speed. Even with a Partial Wing to enhance the jump speed, I can't see a 2/3 mech being able to jump 9.

Edit: Looking closer, those are mechanical jump boosters. So, no heat but you can't turn mid jump. I....uh.... I don't know what to say.

Axe-man
Apr 16, 2005

The product of hundreds of hours of scientific investigation and research.

The perfect meatball.
Clapping Larry

Shoeless posted:

Uh.... how did it get Jump 9? A mech can only have a number of JJs equal to its walk speed, or Improved JJs equal to running speed. Even with a Partial Wing to enhance the jump speed, I can't see a 2/3 mech being able to jump 9.

Edit: Looking closer, those are mechanical jump boosters. So, no heat but you can't turn mid jump. I....uh.... I don't know what to say.

Welcome to experimental tech, I hope you enjoy it. It only gets worse from there.

berryjon
May 30, 2011

I have an invasion to go to.

BattleMaster posted:

We were bullshitting around in IRC about weird experimental tech and I ended up making this: The REAL reason the coalition had trouble kicking the Word of Blake off Terra.

(Art not mine, I GISed for UrbanMech and took the meanest looking remake I found)

I thought Urbies grew up to be Overlords? ;) That, or you plant one Urbie in the ground, and the next day, two more spring up to take its place!

Shoeless
Sep 2, 2011

Axe-man posted:

Welcome to experimental tech, I hope you enjoy it. It only gets worse from there.

Well, it's more like, yeah you've got crazy jumping with no heat, but iirc you can't make any turns or curves while jetting either. Nor will they work while in water. And really, for a 100 tonner with experimental tech, only being armed with an AC/20 and LL is kinda... undergunned. In fact, I honestly can't think of what's taking up so much weight, what with the engine being only 2/3 and the use of ES and FF armor. Do Jump Boosters really weigh so much? *checks* Ah, 5 tons per jump mp. So.... yeah. Guess that explains where all the weight went to.

BattleMaster
Aug 14, 2000

berryjon posted:

I thought Urbies grew up to be Overlords? ;) That, or you plant one Urbie in the ground, and the next day, two more spring up to take its place!

I should try that. I want an UrbanMech garden!

More weird experimental tech with UrbanMech flavor. Here's the reason that the Blakists lost the war.

The interface cockpit was introduced in Jihad: Final Reckoning and was only used in one Word of Blake 'mech in canon. The pilot not only needs Vehicular Direct Neural Interface implants, but needs to wear a special power armour suit to use the cockpit. It grants a further -1/-1 to piloting on top of the -1/-1 from VDNI. You also ignore all gyro hits, and can even build an equipped 'mech without a gyro at all.

If you construct a pilot with VDNI, a pain shunt, and full-body dermal plating and put him in an interface cockpit, he can't take damage from any of the usualt sources source. Not heat, head hits, falling damage, ammo explosions, nothing. There's some overlap between capabilities but that combination covers everything.

The pilot can only be killed through decapitation. Hits to the two cockpit slots deal two hits to the pilot and deal one damage to his interface suit's armour, as well as imparting the same penalty as a gyro hit. Both cockpit slots can be hit and the pilot still survives. As long as the interface suit has armour, a pilot will also survive an armour breach or life support failure in a hostile environment. If the pilot ejects, he can keep fighting as a power armour trooper.

Also, the Void Signature system is adaptive chameleon-like camouflage that works better if the 'mech using it remains still or slow. Not an issue with an UrbanMech!

Rick_Hunter
Jan 5, 2004

My guys are still fighting the hard fight!
(weapons, shields and drones are still online!)

berryjon posted:

I thought Urbies grew up to be Overlords? ;) That, or you plant one Urbie in the ground, and the next day, two more spring up to take its place!

No no no no, NO! Every Urbie's dream is to be an Imp when they grow up.

Congratulations! You Won.
Mar 21, 2007


THE FUTURE IS UNWRITTEN



Ah, yes. The Urbanmech life cycle is always fascinating to study.



You always have to watch out for Overlords, otherwise you might find it leaving dozens of eggs all over the place.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Ba Donk a Bonk posted:

Ah, yes. The Urbanmech life cycle is always fascinating to study.



You always have to watch out for Overlords, otherwise you might find it leaving dozens of eggs all over the place.

This is beautiful. I needed that laugh.

PoptartsNinja
May 9, 2008

He is still almost definitely not a spy


Soiled Meat
Sorry this is taking so long, guys.

Death From Above takes a while to resolve, and the player deserves the best shot I can give him at not being a second third death this round.

cafel
Mar 29, 2010

This post is hurting the economy!

PoptartsNinja posted:

Sorry this is taking so long, guys.

Death From Above takes a while to resolve, and the player deserves the best shot I can give him at not being a second third death this round.

Oh good god, I wish I hadn't seen this. Now to furiously refresh.

Treuan
Jun 30, 2011

Go have some COFFEE with CREAM or something! Because I'll tell you something! This is a happy place!

cafel posted:

Oh good god, I wish I hadn't seen this. Now to furiously refresh.

Look on the bright side. Somebody is probably going to win a bet.

PoptartsNinja
May 9, 2008

He is still almost definitely not a spy


Soiled Meat
Caldera: Tactical Update 8

Combat Phase
A5 Bobcat
- Holds fire!
- Gains 5 heat, sinks ???!

M1 Shadow Hawk
- Fires Autocannon/5 at S1 Coyote (4 base + 0 range + 3 movement + 0 enemy movement + 1 minimum range = 8): rolled 10, hit Rear Center Torso (3/8 armor remains)!
- Fires Medium Laser at S1 Coyote (4 base + 0 range + 3 movement + 0 enemy movement = 7): rolled 7, hit Right Arm (15/20 armor remains)!
- Fires SRM-2 at S1 Coyote (4 base + 0 range + 3 movement + 0 enemy movement = 7): rolled 7, 1 missile hit Right Arm (13/20 armor remains)!
- Gains 10 heat, sinks 12!

M2 Hermes II
- Fires Medium Laser at A6 Griffin (4 base + 0 range + 2 movement + 0 enemy movement = 6): rolled 6, hit Right Torso (5/20 armor remains)!
- Fires Flamer at A6 Griffin (4 base + 0 range + 2 movement + 0 enemy movement = 6): rolled 8, hit Right Torso (3/20 armor remains)!
- Gains 9 heat, sinks 10!

M3 Hammer 1
- Fires Medium Laser at A6 Griffin (4 base + 0 range + 2 movement + 0 enemy movement = 6): rolled 9, hit Rear Right Torso (1/6 armor remains)!
- Fires Medium Laser at A6 Griffin (4 base + 0 range + 2 movement + 0 enemy movement = 6): rolled 11, hit Rear Left Torso (1/6 armor remains)!
- Fires Medium Laser at A6 Griffin (4 base + 0 range + 2 movement + 0 enemy movement = 6): rolled 7, hit Right Arm (1/14 armor remains)! Critical chance!
- Gains 16 heat, sinks 12! Overheating!

M4 Cicada
- Torso twists to threaten hex 1203!
- Fires PPC at S1 Coyote (4 base + 0 range + 2 movement + 0 enemy movement = 6): rolled 6, hit Left Arm (10/20 armor remains)!
- Gains 12 heat, sinks 11!

M6 Valkyrie
- Fires LRM-10 at A5 Bobcat (4 base + 0 range + 2 movement + 2 enemy movement = 8): rolled 8, 6 missiles hit Right Torso (13/18 armor remains), Right Torso (12/18 armor remains)!
- Gains 9 heat, sinks 11!

M7 Spider
- Fires Medium Laser at A6 Griffin (4 base + 0 range + 1 movement + 0 enemy movement = 5): rolled 8, hit Right Torso (0/20 armor, 11/13 structure remains)! Critical chance!
- Fires Medium Laser at A6 Griffin (4 base + 0 range + 1 movement + 0 enemy movement = 5): rolled 5, hit Right Arm (0/14 armor, 5/9 structure remains)! Critical chance!
- Gains 8 heat, sinks 10!

M8 Hammer 2
- Torso twists to threaten hex 0405!
- Fires Medium Laser at A6 Griffin (4 base + 0 range + 1 movement + 0 enemy movement = 5): rolled 6, hit Right Torso (6/13 structure remains)! Critical chance!
- Fires Medium Laser at A6 Griffin (4 base + 0 range + 1 movement + 0 enemy movement = 5): rolled 6, hit Head (4/9 armor remains)! Pilot hit!
- Fires Medium Laser at A6 Griffin (4 base + 0 range + 1 movement + 0 enemy movement = 5): rolled 11, hit Right Leg (8/18 armor remains)!
- Gains 11 heat, sinks 12!

A1 Wolfhound
- Holds fire!
- Gains 2 heat, sinks 10!

A2 Commando
- Holds fire!
- Gains 2 heat, sinks 10!

A3 Clint
- Holds fire!
- Gains 12 heat, sinks 10!

A6 Griffin
- Torso Twists to threaten hex 0903!
- Fires Large Laser at M7 Spider (4 base + 0 range + 0 movement + 1 enemy movement + 2 heat = 7): rolled 10, hit Head (0/6 armor, 0/3 structure remains)! `Mech destroyed!
- Fires Medium Laser at M7 Spider (4 base + 0 range + 0 movement + 1 enemy movement + 2 heat = 7): rolled 3, miss! (PTN’s notes: this was also a cockpit hit)
- Fires Medium Laser at M7 Spider (4 base + 0 range + 0 movement + 1 enemy movement + 2 heat = 7): rolled 5, miss! (PTN’s notes: as was this. Dice! :argh:)
- Gains 19 heat, sinks 16! Overheating!

S1 Coyote
- Fires Snub-Nose PPC at M4 Cicada (4 base + 0 range + 1 movement + 2 enemy movement + 2 heavy woods = 9): rolled 4, miss!
- Fires ER Medium Laser at M4 Cicada (4 base + 0 range + 1 movement + 2 enemy movement + 2 heavy woods = 9): rolled 9, hit Head (4/9 armor remains)! Pilot hit!
- Fires ER Medium Laser at M4 Cicada (4 base + 0 range + 1 movement + 2 enemy movement + 2 heavy woods = 9): rolled 5, miss!
- Fires Streak SRM-6 at M4 Cicada (4 base + 0 range + 1 movement + 2 enemy movement + 2 heavy woods = 9): rolled 6, does not fire!
- Gains 22 heat, sinks ???!

S2 Jackrabbit
- Fires ER Large Laser at M1 Shadow Hawk (4 base + 0 range + 1 movement + 2 enemy movement = 7): rolled 9, hit Left Torso (0/18 armor, 10/13 structure remains)! Critical chance!
- Fires Streak SRM-4 at M1 Shadow Hawk (4 base + 0 range + 1 movement + 2 enemy movement = 7): rolled 10, hit Center Torso (19/23 armor remains), Center Torso (17/23 armor remains), Right Torso (14/18 armor remains), Right Leg (14/16 armor remains)!
- Gains 12 heat, sinks ???!



End Phase:
M1 Shadow Hawk
- Critical chance in Left Torso! No critical hits sustained!

M4 Cicada
- Must pass a 3+ consciousness test: rolled 4, succeeds!

A6 Griffin
- Critical chance in Right Arm! 2 critical hits sustained!
- - Hand destroyed!
- - Medium laser destroyed!
- Critical chance in Right Torso! 2 critical hits sustained!
- - Jump Jet hit!
- - Jump Jet hit!
- Critical chance in Right Arm! No critical hits sustained!
- Critical chance in Right Torso! 2 critical hits sustained!
- - LRM-5 ammo hit!
- - - Suffers 120 damage to Left Torso (0/13 structure remains)! Torso destroyed!
- - - - 117 Damage transfers to Center Torso (0/20 armor, 0/18 structure remains)! `Mech destroyed!
- - - - 84 Damage vented harmlessly!
- - Critical hit transfers to Center Torso! Jump jet hit!



Physical Combat Phase:
A5 Bobcat
- Initiates a Death From Above attack on M1 Shadow Hawk (4 base + 3 movement + 2 enemy movement = 9): rolled 9, hit!
- - Deals 14 damage to M1 Shadow Hawk’s Right Torso (9/18 armor remains), Head (4/9 armor remains) Pilot hit!, and Right Torso (5/18 armor remains)!
- - Suffers 9 damage to Right Leg (13/18 armor remains), Right Leg (9/18 armor remains)!
- - M1 Shadow Hawk displaced into hex 0910!



End Phase:
M1 Shadow Hawk
- Must pass a 3+ consciousness test: rolled 7, succeeds!
- Must pass a piloting test or fall (5 base + 2 Death From Above Victim = 7): rolled 7, succeeds!

A5 Bobcat
- Must pass a piloting test or fall (4 base + 4 Death From Above Initiator = 8): rolled 8, succeeds!





“We got this guy,” Private Flavian Gryphon crowed triumphantly as he brought his Spider around in a lazy turn and speared the battered remains of the enemy Griffin with his medium lasers. Titanium and steel flashed to vapor as his medium lasers speared the machine like some ancient hunter prodding a wounded lion. There was an actinic flash as the `Mech’s jump jets exploded under the lasers’ scarlet beams, and the Griffin bled smoke from a dozen breaches.

Like a beast at bay, it came about—the Lion was dying, but the eagle still had eyes and a vicious beak. Flavian felt a moment of supreme triumph as the Griffin erupted—taking out a much larger `Mech was every scout pilot’s dream. Everything in his Spider’s cockpit seemed suffused in a warm glow.

An amber flash filled Flavian’s eyes.





Mission Objective:
Drive Off the 17th Arcturan Guards (3/6)

Secondary Objective:
Destroy or Disable the 17th Arcturan Guards (1/6)
Destroy or Disable the Unknown `Mechs (0/2)





Enemy Movement Modifiers:
A1) WLF-1 Wolfhound – +3 ran
A2) COM-2D Commando – +3 ran
A5) B0C-13T Bobcat (ACE) – [+3 jumped]
S1) W1L-3C Coyote – +2 Ran
S2)JKR-10R Jackrabbit – +0 Stationary








Protectorate Iron GuardM1) SHD-2H Shadow Hawk
Weight: 55 tons (Medium)
HD A(S): 4/9 (3/3)
LT A(S): 0/18 (10/13)
LT R A(S): 1/6
CT A(S): 17/23 (18/18)
CT R A(S): 8/8
RT A(S): 5/18 (13/13)
RT R A(S): 6/6
LA A(S): 0/16 (9/9)
RA A(S): 16/16 (9/9)
LL A(S): 1/16 (13/13)
RL A(S): 14/16 (13/13)
Heat: 0/30
Overheat Penalty: None
Heat Sinks: 12
Movement: 5/8/3
Mechwarrior: Pilot 5, Gunnery 4
Mechwarrior Name: Lieutenant S.G. Erasmus Chatzi
Mechwarrior Player: Sair
Mechwarrior Status: OK!
Armament:
Autocannon/5 – LT (Heat: 1, Ammo: 14, Range: (L:18 M:12 S:6 Min:3), Status: OK!)
LRM-5 – RT (Heat: 2, Ammo: 20, Range: (L:21 M:14 S:7 Min:6), Status: OK!)
SRM-2 – HD (Heat: 2, Ammo: 45, Range: (L:9 M:6 S:3), Status: OK!)
Medium Laser – RA (Heat: 3, Range: (L:9 M:6 S:3), Status: OK!)
Critical Damage: None!
Notes: 2 hands

M2) HER-2S Hermes II
Weight: 40 tons (Medium)
HD A(S): 9/9 (3/3)
LT A(S): 14/14 (10/10)
LT R A(S): 5/5
CT A(S): 17/17 (12/12)
CT R A(S): 6/6
RT A(S): 14/14 (10/10)
RT R A(S): 5/5
LA A(S): 0/11 (2/6)
RA A(S): 11/11 (6/6)
LL A(S): 14/14 (10/10)
RL A(S): 14/14 (10/10)
Heat: 0/30
Overheat Penalty: None
Heat Sinks: 10
Movement: 6/9/0
Mechwarrior: Pilot 4, Gunnery 4
Mechwarrior Name: Sergeant Damaris Golde
Mechwarrior Player: Pinguliten
Mechwarrior Status: OK!
Armament:
Medium Laser – RA (Heat: 3, Range: (L:9 M:6 S:3), Status: OK!)
Flamer – LA (Heat: 2, Range: (L:3 M:2 S:1), Status: OK!)
Autocannon/5 – RT (Heat: 1, Ammo: 15, Range: (L:18 M:12 S:6 Min:3), Status: OK!)
Critical Damage: Left Upper Arm Actuator destroyed!
Notes: 1 hand

M3) HMR-2M Hammer 1
Weight: 30 tons (Light)
HD A(S): 9/9 (3/3)
LT A(S): 2/10 (7/7)
LT R A(S): 4/4
CT A(S): 2/15 (10/10)
CT R A(S): 4/4
RT A(S): 0/10 (7/7)
RT R A(S): 4/4
LA A(S): 0/10 (0/5)
RA A(S): 10/10 (5/5)
LL A(S): 9/14 (7/7)
RL A(S): 14/14 (7/7)
Heat: 7/30
Overheat Penalty: Movement reduced to 4/6/0!
Heat Sinks: 12
Movement: 5/8/0
Mechwarrior: Pilot 5, Gunnery 4
Mechwarrior Name: Private Karan Stephanopoulos
Mechwarrior Player: BatteredFeltFedora
Mechwarrior Status: OK!
Armament:
LRM-5 – RT (Heat: 2, Ammo: 23, Range: (L:21 M:14 S:7 Min:6), Status: OK!)
LRM-5 – LT (Heat: 2, Ammo: -, Range: (L:21 M:14 S:7 Min:6), Status: OK!)
Medium Laser – CT (Heat: 3, Range: (L:9 M:6 S:3), Status: OK!)
Medium Laser – CT (Heat: 3, Range: (L:9 M:6 S:3), Status: OK!)
Medium Laser – HD (Heat: 3, Range: (L:9 M:6 S:3), Status: OK!)
Critical Damage: Engine hit!
Notes: 2 hands

M4) CDA-3C (field refit) Cicada
Weight: 40 tons (Class)
HD A(S): 4/9 (3/3)
LT A(S): 6/6 (10/10)
LT R A(S): 3/3
CT A(S): 11/11 (12/12)
CT R A(S): 6/6
RT A(S): 6/6 (10/10)
RT R A(S): 3/3
LA A(S): 4/4 (6/6)
RA A(S): 4/4 (6/6)
LL A(S): 6/6 (10/10)
RL A(S): 6/6 (10/10)
Heat: 4/30
Overheat Penalty: None
Heat Sinks: 11
Movement: 7/11/0
Mechwarrior: Pilot 4, Gunnery 4
Mechwarrior Name: PFC Stavros Andreou
Mechwarrior Player: Rhobot Mk. II
Mechwarrior Status: Caught in a cloud of transplex vapor (3+)!
Armament:
PPC – RT (Heat: 10, Range: (L:18 M:12 S:6 M:3), Status: OK!)
Medium Laser – CT (Heat: 3, Range: (L:9 M:6 S:3), Status: OK!)
Small Laser – RL (Heat: 1, Range: (L:3 M:2 S:1), Status: OK!)
Small Laser – LL (Heat: 1, Range: (L:3 M:2 S:1), Status: OK!)
Critical Damage: None!
Notes: no arm actuators

M5) HER-1S Hermes
Weight: 30 tons (Light)
Mechwarrior Name: Lieutenant J.G. Lycoris Asker
Mechwarrior Player: LeschNyhan
Mechwarrior Status: Flash burns (3+), Killed in Action!
Notes: Destroyed!

M6) VAL-QA Valkyrie
Weight: 30 tons (Light)
HD A(S): 8/8 (3/3)
LT A(S): 7/12 (7/7)
LT R A(S): 2/2
CT A(S): 14/14 (10/10)
CT R A(S): 4/4
RT A(S): 7/12 (7/7)
RT R A(S): 2/2
LA A(S): 9/9 (5/5)
RA A(S): 9/9 (5/5)
LL A(S): 3/12 (7/7)
RL A(S): 12/12 (7/7)
Heat: 0/30
Overheat Penalty: None
Heat Sinks: 11
Movement: 5/8/5
Mechwarrior: Pilot 5, Gunnery 4
Mechwarrior Name: Corporal Hector Halas
Mechwarrior Player: GreyjoyBastard
Mechwarrior Status: OK!
Armament:
Medium Laser –RA (Heat: 3, Range: (L:9 M:6 S:3), Status: OK!)
LRM-10 – LT (Heat: 4, Ammo: 4, Range: (L:21 M:14 S:7 Min:6), Status: OK!)
Critical Damage: None!
Notes: 1 hand

M7) SDR-5V Spider
Weight: 30 tons (Light)
HD A(S): 1/6 (3/3)
LT A(S): 1/6 (7/7)
LT R A(S): 2/2
CT A(S): 8/8 (10/10)
CT R A(S): 4/4
RT A(S): 6/6 (7/7)
RT R A(S): 2/2
LA A(S): 0/5 (0/5)
RA A(S): 0/5 (5/5)
LL A(S): 6/6 (7/7)
RL A(S): 6/6 (7/7)
Heat: 0/30
Overheat Penalty: None
Heat Sinks: 10
Movement: 8/12/8
Mechwarrior: Pilot 5, Gunnery 4
Mechwarrior Name: PFC Flavian Gryphon
Mechwarrior Player: cafel
Mechwarrior Status: 2nd degree burns (3+)
Armament:
Medium Laser – CT (Heat: 3, Range: (L:9 M:6 S:3), Status: OK!)
Medium Laser – CT (Heat: 3, Range: (L:9 M:6 S:3), Status: OK!)
Critical Damage: Left Arm Blown Off!
Notes: 2 hands

M8) HMR-2M Hammer 2
Weight: 30 tons (Light)
HD A(S): 9/9 (3/3)
LT A(S): 0/10 (0/7)
LT R A(S): 4/4
CT A(S): 0/15 (7/10)
CT R A(S): 4/4
RT A(S): 10/10 (7/7)
RT R A(S): 4/4
LA A(S): 10/10 (5/5)
RA A(S): 10/10 (5/5)
LL A(S): 14/14 (7/7)
RL A(S): 14/14 (7/7)
Heat: 3/30
Overheat Penalty:
Heat Sinks: 12 11
Movement: 5/8/0
Mechwarrior: Pilot 5, Gunnery 4
Mechwarrior Name: Private Vernados Zane
Mechwarrior Player: Slaan
Mechwarrior Status: OK!
Armament:
LRM-5 – RT (Heat: 2, Ammo: 21, Range: (L:21 M:14 S:7 Min:6), Status: OK!)
LRM-5 – LT (Heat: 2, Ammo: -, Range: (L:21 M:14 S:7 Min:6), Status: Destroyed!)
Medium Laser – CT (Heat: 3, Range: (L:9 M:6 S:3), Status: OK!)
Medium Laser – CT (Heat: 3, Range: (L:9 M:6 S:3), Status: OK!)
Medium Laser – HD (Heat: 3, Range: (L:9 M:6 S:3), Status: OK!)
Critical Damage: Gyro hit! Left arm blown off!
Notes: 2 hands





17th Arcturan Guards
A1) WLF-1 Wolfhound
Weight: 35 tons (Light)
Overheat Penalty: None
Movement: 6/9/0
Mechwarrior Status: OK!
Armament:
Large Laser, 4x Medium Laser
Critical Damage: None!
Notes: 1 hand, Fleeing!

A2) COM-2D Commando
Weight: 25 tons (Light)
Overheat Penalty: None
Movement: 6/9/0
Mechwarrior Status: OK!
Armament:
SRM-4, Medium Laser, SRM-6
Critical Damage: Left Upper Leg Actuator hit!
Notes: 2 hands, Fleeing!

A3) CLNT-2-3T Clint
Weight: 40 tons (Medium)
Notes: Fled!

A4) BZK-F2 Hollander
Weight: 35 tons (Light)
Mechwarrior Status: KIA!
Notes: 2 hands

A5) B0C-13T Bobcat
Weight: 45 tons (Medium)
Overheat Penalty: None
Movement: 6/9/6
Mechwarrior Status: OK!
Armament:
PPC, 2x Medium Laser, ???
Critical Damage: None!
Notes: 1 hand, ACE

A6) GRF-1S Griffin
Weight: 55 tons (Medium)
Mechwarrior Status: KIA!
Notes: 2 hands

S1) WIL-3C Coyote
Weight: 65 tons (Heavy)
Overheat Penalty: None
Movement: 5/8/0
Mechwarrior Status: OK!
Armament:
PPC, Medium Laser, Medium Laser, SRM-6, ???
Critical Damage: None!
Notes: 1 hand

S2) JKR-10R Jackrabbit
Weight: 25 tons (Light)
Overheat Penalty: None
Movement: 6/9/0
Mechwarrior Status: OK!
Armament:
Large laser, ???
Critical Damage: None!
Notes: 1 hand

cafel
Mar 29, 2010

This post is hurting the economy!
Ouch. That one's my fault, I had a lapse of judgment and thought I'd be out of the Griffin line of fire. Should have gone to 0901.

And yet again eliminated by head shot while my front torso armor is still entirely intact. In a way it's lucky.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

cafel posted:

Ouch. That one's my fault, I had a lapse of judgment and thought I'd be out of the Griffin line of fire. Should have gone to 0901.

And yet again eliminated by head shot while my front torso armor is still entirely intact. In a way it's lucky.

The :psyboom: emote comes to mind :v: Ah, Battletech.

Slaan
Mar 16, 2009



ASHERAH DEMANDS I FEAST, I VOTE FOR A FEAST OF FLESH
So many head hits that round!

And I got the last critical hit in the right torso, so I claim that cook-off kill :colbert:

Treuan
Jun 30, 2011

Go have some COFFEE with CREAM or something! Because I'll tell you something! This is a happy place!
Hmm. Looks like they're starting to run. If you focus A5 and hope the other two run, you can probably finish the primary, and maybe the second secondary.

cafel
Mar 29, 2010

This post is hurting the economy!

Slaan posted:

And I got the last critical hit in the right torso, so I claim that cook-off kill :colbert:

The first crit set off the ammo, yours bounced around uselessly. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

edit: I also have to add how guilty I feel for getting Gryphon (How ironic!) killed. I miss that smug bastard already.

cafel fucked around with this message at 07:10 on May 25, 2012

PoptartsNinja
May 9, 2008

He is still almost definitely not a spy


Soiled Meat

cafel posted:

The first crit set off the ammo, yours bounced around uselessly. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

That's precisely how Flavian would've wanted it. :spain:

Slaan
Mar 16, 2009



ASHERAH DEMANDS I FEAST, I VOTE FOR A FEAST OF FLESH

cafel posted:

The first crit set off the ammo, yours bounced around uselessly. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

edit: I also have to add how guilty I feel for getting Gryphon (How ironic!) killed. I miss that smug bastard already.

No YOU shut up! :fwl:



Did I do that right? :ohdear:


e: You said in the fluff that the targeting seems to be random. Are you actually randomly targeting the bobcat?

Slaan fucked around with this message at 07:16 on May 25, 2012

Defiance Industries
Jul 22, 2010

A five-star manufacturer


Slaan posted:

No YOU shut up! :fwl:

I think that is the thing I am most proud of adding to this thread.

Artificer
Apr 8, 2010

You're going to try ponies and you're. Going. To. LOVE. ME!!
Awww. I always feel sad when a Goon controlled pilot dies. Not necessarily gets his mech destroyed, but actually dies.


Unless the pilot is a clanner.

PoptartsNinja
May 9, 2008

He is still almost definitely not a spy


Soiled Meat

Slaan posted:

e: You said in the fluff that the targeting seems to be random. Are you actually randomly targeting the bobcat?

Except in rare turns, yes. Random (with no duplication allowed) and only rare deviations (such as trying to keep someone from backshooting the Coyote).

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

I just want to point out that all of the goon's shots hit this round. Every one of them. A big improvement!

Defiance Industries
Jul 22, 2010

A five-star manufacturer


Leperflesh posted:

I just want to point out that all of the goon's shots hit this round. Every one of them. A big improvement!

That IS a pretty rare occurrence. I would recommend against building our strategy around it though, cause it doesn't happen usually.

Unless you're Ion Rush. Mark my words, he will pay.

GhostStalker
Mar 26, 2010

Guys, find a woman who looks at you the way GhostStalker looks at every bald, obese, single 58 year old accountant from Tulsa who managed to win $4,000 by not wagering on a Final Jeopardy triple stumper.

Bad luck for the Spider there, but at least he (might have?) got the Griffin. The dying mech gave as good as he got back, I guess.

Also, headshots everywhere! One from a Death from Above as well... That Bobcat really has been annoying you guys, hasn't he? At least the one from the Coyote wasn't from the Snub Nose PPC, or else you guys would have lost the Cicada as well...

Well, at least the Clint is gone from the battle, the Wolfhound and the Commando soon to join it. Though I noticed that PTN forgot to update the secondary objective counter for the Griffin getting destroyed, though you did count it for the drive off objective. Lastly, you didn't update the fact that the Shadow Hawk took a pilot hit in the status block underneath the map, and didn't mark the Spider dead. Oh well, we all know what went down this turn...

EDIT:\/\/\/\/\/\/ Huh, guess that makes sense. Still, you didn't change the status of the mech or the pilot to dead, either.

GhostStalker fucked around with this message at 09:09 on May 25, 2012

PoptartsNinja
May 9, 2008

He is still almost definitely not a spy


Soiled Meat

GhostStalker posted:

and didn't mark the Spider dead. Oh well, we all know what went down this turn...

I don't mark player `Mechs dead until the following turn, so people can see what their armor/etc looked like on the last turn they were active.

Sam Hall
Jun 29, 2003

Rick_Hunter posted:

No no no no, NO! Every Urbie's dream is to be an Imp when they grow up.

Or a Flashman, although you need to find a thunderstone before it hits 30 if you're going that route.



Also ouch bad break for the spider there:ohdear:

Tempest_56
Mar 14, 2009

Treuan posted:

If you focus A5 and hope the other two run, you can probably finish the primary, and maybe the second secondary.

This. That Bobcat's mauled you enough - hit it hard and complete the primary objective. If you can't get a shot at it, hit the Jackrabbit (which is FAR more fragile than the Coyote and should die fairly quick).

Goatse James Bond
Mar 28, 2010

If you see me posting please remind me that I have Charlie Work in the reports forum to do instead
Four turns of LRM fire left.

Glad I pegged the Bobcat there.

generally I prefer
Apr 17, 2006

Defiance Industries posted:

That IS a pretty rare occurrence. I would recommend against building our strategy around it though, cause it doesn't happen usually.

Unless you're Ion Rush. Mark my words, he will pay.

Gotta love those LRM-20s at close range.

bunnyofdoom
Mar 29, 2008

Jaxxon: Still not the stupidest thing from the expanded universe.



PTN, just woondering, but how much of your portrayl of Clovis Lestrade is influenced by Tyrion Lannister,

PoptartsNinja
May 9, 2008

He is still almost definitely not a spy


Soiled Meat

bunnyofdoom posted:

PTN, just woondering, but how much of your portrayl of Clovis Lestrade is influenced by Tyrion Lannister,

Almost 0% since I haven't read any of the Song of Ice and Fire. I've got the first book on my kindle, but I haven't gotten around to reading it.

I'm actually basing Clovis Lestrade on Stackpole's Clovis Lestrade (with the silliness turned down, so the actually dangerous Clovis Lestrade you see a grand total of once).



Duncin Marik, on the other hand, is based on Arnold J. Rimmer (he's actually not :ssh:).

legoman727
Mar 13, 2010

by exmarx
Alright. Just focus everything on the Bobcat and the primary objective's yours. Then hopefully the two remaining mechs don't take you out.

Defiance Industries
Jul 22, 2010

A five-star manufacturer


Speaking of Clovis, will we see any developments on the Skye/Viper front next time?

Taerkar
Dec 7, 2002

kind of into it, really

PoptartsNinja posted:

Duncin Marik, on the other hand, is based on Arnold J. Rimmer (he's actually not :ssh:).

Ace Rimmer then? What a guy!

bunnyofdoom
Mar 29, 2008

Jaxxon: Still not the stupidest thing from the expanded universe.



Taerkar posted:

Ace Rimmer then? What a guy!

Which one? Will one of the missions involve us smoking a kipper for his breakdast¿

Plek
Jul 30, 2009

PoptartsNinja posted:


Duncin Marik, on the other hand, is based on Arnold J. Rimmer (he's actually not :ssh:).

That's a personality I can get behind. :D

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TildeATH
Oct 21, 2010

by Lowtax

bunnyofdoom posted:

Which one? Will one of the missions involve us smoking a kipper for his breakdast¿

Or a tub of butter...

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