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LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

CommonShore posted:

Fighters can be more or less dependent on their attributes, but "in good shape" isn't a noteworthy attribute for a pro fighter.

my guy, have you seen the heavyweight division?

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LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Grifter posted:

I think that once you reach really elite levels of athletic competition you have to have some combination of hard working, physical gifts, skills, attitude and some other advantages to really get there. I think it devalues fighters to shrink them down to just being one particular physical attribute. Jon Jones has a huge wingspan and that enables him to do crazy things like use elbows as punches but he still wouldn't be able to do that without building up skills with those elbows. People like the Diazes have great attributes in their awesome cardio but that wouldn't mean much without those hours of hitting the bag.

Totally agree. There's probably dudes out there that do BJJ as often or more than Maia, but they're lacking something to be as successful as he is

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"
fedor was too cowardly to fight josh barnett like 35 different times

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"
youd think people would have remembered the time top kickboxer lucia rijker got knocked out by some alleged australian muay thai champ and figured that no, a woman likely isnt beating a dude in a fist fight

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Mr. Carlisle posted:

We all know about broken legs from checked kicks like Anderson Silva's leg exploding - but have there been mid fight instances of broken arms/hands/forearms from checked head or body kicks? We see guys block full force head kicks with their hands and forearms constantly but I don't remember any noticeable mid-fight injuries from it.

Wasn't there an arm break in the Liddell/Franklin fight?

Did I dream that Randy got his arm broke vs Gonzaga?

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"
Cant believe i forgot until just now, but Jacare got his arm broke vs Roger Gracie in a bjj match and Souza still won in the end

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

butros posted:

Fixed that for you

he neutralized roger's offense, completely shutting him down, much like abu schaubi would later do vs cyborg abreu

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"
Conor got mount on Holloway a bunch of times, but Max would just give up his back and escape out the back each time

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Sweaty IT Nerd posted:

I just watched McGregor Holloway and Max got absolutely tuned up before he got taken down by Irish wrestling. Did one of them suffer a grotesque knee injury?

Max broke his foot and Conor tore up his knee

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Eat This Glob posted:

still undefeated at ikea

e: google isn't turning up anything but ikea news when I look up "mark Coleman ikea"

anyone have that story saved? i was hoping to read it for old times sake

found it. good as it ever was

Lemme tell you a true story.

Back in early 2004, I was impersonating Wes Sims for a few months as part of a bet. So me and The Hammer, we're going to Ikea, cause he needs to buy a chair, right? Nothing fancy, just a simple office chair with good lumbar support, cause he'd hurt his back a little fighting Fedor. So we're in Ikea, looking through all the Bjorns and Karls and Fingords and whatever the gently caress else they call the loving furniture, and Coleman's hopping in and out of the little display models, stretching and going "UUUURGH" and all "I don't like this one, these arms are gonna piss me off if I buy this and stuff".

Eventually we settle on one, I forget which, and we go looking for a member of staff. We find one, pimply little motherfucker, and he's all "Uh I'll need to go get a forklift driver cause it's kinda heavy" and, well, Mark is obviously a strong dude and we don't wanna wait cause we gotta go get our Swedish Meatball on, so we go with this dude to the warehouse, and we're gonna carry the chair ourselves, y'know? And that's when it goes bad. Somewhere on the other side of the warehouse, some numbnuts drops something, BANG, just like that.

And Mark lets instinct take over.

First victim is the pimply kid, cause I'd gotten used to Coleman by this point and got a pallet jack between me and him as soon as I heard the bang. The kid, obviously not too wise on his PRIDE, takes it like a sandbag, straight down, his head hitting the concrete floor like a canteloupe. Pretty grody.

Mark realises what he's done, and obviously he's pretty stressed, and for some hosed up reason there's, like, sixty display chairs and tables set up in the warehouse, must be about to be taken out to the shop floor for a display, except he doesn't see that, he just sees a forest of legs, all of them in pairs. It was like watching a bull slew through a bunch of paraplegics, I tell you. He's just BAM, double leg, BAM, double leg, BAM, double leg, shouting and bellowing the whole way. He gasses after his first five or six, but keeps BAM double legging them, for a whole twenty minutes. Last thing I remember of that godawful carnage, as I booked it out of a back door and the cops arrive, is a mental image, startling in its clarity still, of Mark Coleman doing the whizzer on a BERTIL, his face as orange as Hell's own glow.

It took a few cops to bring him in, of course. Eventually one of them made sergeant by screaming "THIS IS K-1 RULES!" in his face and cuffing him while he was confused. The trial was called off when the jury all got mysteriously injured a few days before, and the judge didn't post his arm correctly and dislocated his elbow. The only reporter foolhardy enough to try and cover the story got as far as "Noted cage fighter Mark "The Hammer"" before getting double-legged right through his own desk. As for me? Well, I won my bet. Easiest sixteen bucks I ever made.

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"
p sure it, like most of the great posts on this subforum, is from dunc

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Forceholy posted:

Speaking of Brits being murdered by Big shots,

Didn't Condit drop Dan Hardy with a good shot in the UK? I remember a bunch of celebrities watching in the crowd and Robert Downey Jr. being the only one cheering as the Brit was dropped.

They traded hooks, and Condit was first.

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"
while this is clearly z-grade trash, the B-League thread is the place for such things

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

MysteryNad posted:

Yeah, reminder that Ken Shamrock made Tito Ortiz look like a genius for an entire season of TUF

Ken didnt have a jiu-jitsu coach, but he did have a strength and conditioning guy that cooked steaks for the team

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"
i hope $kala finally found all the right ones and settled down

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Sweaty IT Nerd posted:

I feel like you'd have to put a bunch of qualifiers on there to come up with an answer that would have a pretty wide range.

Yeah, reading the two articles linked below have kind of a narrow scope. The 12 year one is just looking at "the top 15 retired UFC fighters"

I know from the experience of looking up fighter records with the idea of doing some kind of math to them, there are tons of dudes who take 1 pro fight, lose, and never step in the cage again

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"
possible answer: poster has shy arteries that refuse to be compressed

more likely answer: jiu jitsu isnt real

LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

MassRafTer posted:

Could someone post one of the most important image in Combat Sports, jokes.jpg?

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LobsterMobster
Oct 29, 2009

"I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Torquemada posted:

I'm probably going to regret asking this, but it's really irritating me: the news keeps referring to Andrew Tate as variously 'a champion kickboxer' even occasionally 'a four-time world champion kickboxer'. Since pretty much everything about him is fake, this is complete horseshit, right? He doesn't look like he could fight his way out of a wet paper bag.

He's kickboxing accomplishments are less legit than Stephen Thompson's Georgia state IKSA shiny pants karate stuff

As far as I know, Tate was never in a major organization.

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