Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

When you guys got sick during pregnancy, who did you call first, the obgyn or a regular doctor? I think I just have a cold, but it's lasted for over a week and now my ears feel like they're about to erupt. I don't have a regular doctor yet, so I would go to urgent care to rule out an infection. I tried calling the obgyn office but they couldn't hear me with the only phone I have.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

I don't have a primary care doctor because we moved here while I was pregnant and I haven't needed anything other than an ob. Anyway I called the nurse at the ob office and she said I could take sudafed and plain robitussin, and if I was still all congested after a couple of days then I should go to urgent care and make sure I don't have an infection. I figure I'll start with the sudafed and see how that goes.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

I didn't feel any contractions until after my water broke five days after my due date.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

Did anyone here have a VBAC?

I'm trying to figure out what to do this time around. Last time I had an emergency c-section after 2-3 hours of active labor with no progress. While I would like to have a VBAC, I almost want a guarantee that I won't go through the same thing as last time. A scheduled c-section sounds nice if I can avoid all the pain of labor, but with a toddler I don't want to go through the recovery. I definitely don't want to be recovering from tearing as well though. My doctor says he recommends a c-section, but left it up to me.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

CommanderApaul posted:

But we're getting some pushback from friends and family who want us to find out, seemingly more out of a want to shower us with gender-appropriate gifts and knitted/crocheted blankets and the like, and we don't really want to be rude and say, essentially, "gently caress off, we're not finding out, deal with it," but my wife isn't comfortable discussing our reasoning behind it with them.

Bit of an info dump, but any suggestions?
I didn't find out with either of my pregnancies, and no one gave\gives a crap. The first one was nice because we got a lot of gender-neutral stuff that we can use for this next kid, not that it would really be a big deal either way. But I don't see why you can't just say you want to be surprised. That's what I tell people. Actually it's my husband who wants to be surprised, not me. But I go along with it because I'm a team player. If I'm feeling really chatty then I'll suggest that my husband really wants a boy and doesn't want to be disappointed before the big day.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

I was convinced I was having a boy the whole time and really just couldn't imagine having a girl, and didn't find out she was a girl until birth. I was very surprised, but pretty drugged up and not caring much. My husband was really disappointed I think. But after a while we couldn't imagine having anything else.

Although this time if I don't have a boy my husband might not take it so well. We don't even have a girl named picked out. It seems like the ones I like have already been taken by cousins or coworkers, or they're in the top 10 of popular baby names. As a Jennifer born in the 70s, I'm a little sensitive to that.

My sister-in-law posted her positive test stick on facebook the day she found out she was pregnant. A few days later she posted that she's already showing. Personally I would tell my parents right away and maybe some strangers on the internet, but not everyone else I know. I'm also a little ticked that I have to share this pregnancy with her just like the last, even though it's a dumb thing to be mad about I suppose. Maybe it's because my brother always insists that (more) kids are not in their future, and then when I get knocked up they do.

Maybe if I have another girl I should steal the name they picked. It's the "Jennifer" of this decade though.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

I'm 35 weeks and my doctor doesn't think I'm a good candidate for a VBAC, so I'm having another surgery. Last time I did my best with labor, but baby didn't want to come out after 2-3 hours of pushing. By then I was so drugged up and tired that I wanted the baby out and didn't care how. I didn't really feel anything with the surgery, other than afterwards all the side effects of the drugs, which they gave me even more drugs for. I think the worst part of recovery was I felt bad that I somehow didn't do everything I could to have a normal delivery. I also tore, and adding that to everything wasn't fun either.

Anyway, having gone through it once, I'm not worried about the surgery at all. I'm annoyed that it's scheduled for 2pm and I can't eat or drink for 8 hours beforehand. I hate to say it, but I am so sick of my job that I'm just excited about my maternity leave. My husband can take a couple of weeks off, and one of our moms should be around, so I'll have someone to take care of my two year old and other things. Recovery is annoying with the lifting restrictions and stuff, but it was never very painful or anything.

Also the extra time at the hospital was actually nice, and I almost didn't want to go home. I mean it's annoying when you're finally about to doze off and some nurse comes in to give you medication or something, but they helped out a ton.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

Did anyone else not have the group b strep test at 35-37 weeks? I was expecting it at today's 36 week visit, and it didn't happen, nor was I asked to schedule it. I thought maybe since I was having a planned c-section that was why, but I'm reading that it should be done for every pregnancy. I'll call the doctor tomorrow and see what's up.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

I had a pregnant coworker rage at me the other day because I asked how part of the product she works on worked. I don't give a crap that she's pregnant - I'm pregnant and work in the same stressful environment and have never flipped my poo poo at anyone for no reason. Plus she's done this many times before when she wasn't pregnant, although I haven't seen it happen in the past few years. She's never apologized, and didn't in this case either. It's really like a cranky toddler having a tantrum.

Maybe I'm overly sensitive at this point, but in my opinion if she can't behave even remotely professionally at work, then she should stay at home. When I'm in a better mood to deal with her then I'll make sure she knows my feelings about her conduct, but for now I'm just doing my best to avoid her.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

car dance posted:

Are ginger tea and ginger chews actually that good for morning sickness? I've tried saltines and carbonated water, but they're not helping a lot.
I tried ginger and the taste made me want to gag more than the morning sickness. The thing that helped most was mint, but I had a pretty mild case of it.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

Dr. Octagon posted:

So I've been following this "Baby Project" thing that NPR has been doing. Last week, this lady posted a picture of her swollen, pregnant feet that made me gasp. (With all the nausea talk, I didn't want to just slap that picture up in the thread.)

She just had her baby, so she was close to the end... but still. Please, someone tell me that this won't happen to my feet. This is not normal, right? If I looked down and saw that, I would be horrified.
My feet got that bad. Even the people at the hospital were amazed. I could barely wear men's flipflops. Everything else was normal though - no pre-eclampsia or anything. I drank a lot of water, tried elevating my feet, but nothing helped. I was still able to walk a mile a day though. I guess it didn't bother me that much because I was already huge everywhere else it felt like.

I'm at the same point or later in my second pregnancy at the same time of the year as before, and I can still wear shoes. Only near the end of the day do my feet swell a little. The only real differences I've noticed between this time and last are that I had a little morning sickness this time, and my feet aren't the size of hams.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

Crazy Old Clarice posted:

I am almost halfway through my first pregnancy and in the past few days have been waking up with my right ear feeling clogged.
I had this when I got sick mid-pregnancy. It didn't go away for a couple of weeks and Sudafed didn't help, although I didn't take much of it. It was really annoying, but eventually went away. I had some serious congestion with that cold though and couldn't even taste anything for several days.

Now at 37 weeks when I sleep on my right side, it will clog up and usually go away a few minutes after I get up or roll over. Maybe there's still some fluid in there.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

Of all the things I hated about pregnancy (being sick, heartburn, not being able to sleep, etc), people asking me how I was feeling was not one of them. Maybe instead of expecting to be offended by people taking an interest, you just kind of let it go? I got some "unwanted" advice, but people just like talking about stuff they're familiar with. One day you might be one of those people talking to a newly pregnant woman about your pregnancy, or annoying everyone with pictures of and anecdotes about your child. I'm sure you'll appreciate being able to talk to people about what cute thing the kid did today without worrying whether that person hates kids.

Maybe I just didn't have it bad enough - I generally don't like extra attention either but it's not like people were asking about my bowel movements. Nor did I really share much about anything. I just make the assumption (which is generally correct in my case) that no one except my mom cares anything about kids and their creation. I'm just happy to talk about something other than work most of the time.

I feel like someone will take the tone of this post wrong. Really it's just hard to reconcile what I went through being so different from what everyone else had. Plus the attitude in this thread makes me think people like talking about being pregnant and exchanging advice and all that, so it seems weird that people hate it so much in real life. Like I said I was happy to talk about anything besides work, because I hate my job more than anything.

opie fucked around with this message at 14:41 on Aug 7, 2011

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

bamzilla posted:

Yea, of the things that annoyed me about being pregnant, being asked about it wasn't one of them. Wait until someone tries to touch your stomach or when you're at the end of your pregnancy and you keep on hearing "get sleep while you can because..!". This is just the beginning so I guess take this time to enjoy it before poo poo gets really obnoxious (enjoy people's comments, that is). :)
Even that didn't bother me. I only remember one non-family member touching my stomach, and she's kind of the grandma of the office so it didn't bother me. I don't remember the "sleep while you can" stuff because my biggest complaint towards the end of both pregnancies was being in too much pain to sleep - and that's what I would tell people if they asked how I was. I got a lot of "it must suck to be pregnant during the summer" comments, but last time I said I was jut happy I could wear flipflops, and this time I just said "it's a good thing summer hasn't started yet". Where I live it rains most of the year except summer, and this year has been particularly cool temperature-wise. Also I love having my maternity leave when the weather is nice. And generally it's not flu season.

The most annoying thing I heard was actually from my husband, complaining about being too tired. It's almost always his fault too - he purposely stays up too late knowing I'm a morning person, while I go to bed early unless I'm working.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

I have a newborn, a bunch of prefolds, and some newborn-sized bummi whisper wraps. I could've sworn we used these with the last kid before her cord stump fell off. Maybe I'm just remembering wrong? I can't think of how we'd put them on without the stump getting irritated though. We have a diaper service so I'd hate to waste all that time and money waiting for it to fall off, and I'm pretty sure we didn't last time.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

We ended up with a ton of clothes, although they were all new courtesy of our mothers. I appreciated it most of the time, but then I'd feel bad when the kid never wore something, or when I wanted to buy something and realized it would just be a waste. It was the same with toys. I got to buy furniture and diapers and that's about it.

Since we had a second girl, we've decided to tell our moms that we already have too much stuff and we don't want them to buy anything else aside from one or two things for special occasions. My mom might respect this, but I think my mother-in-law will somehow be offended by it, since she seems to think that showing love is the same as buying stuff. I don't want the kids thinking things are disposable and grandma will replace everything. Plus, I would like to buy fun stuff every once in a while.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

With the first kid my husband couldn't take more than a couple days off without bad consequences, but he felt pretty useless anyway and to be honest just got on my nerves about wanting to "help" and give the kid formula. This time since we have a 2 year old and I had a c-section, he's taking a month off. He spends almost all the time with the toddler, while I take care of the baby. This time around I also made him take the spare room since there's really nothing he can do when the baby wakes up and wants to eat, and he needs the sleep more.

We have to pay for a minimum of daycare (two days a week) to keep the toddler enrolled, so she still goes and that helps as well. I really don't know what I'm going to do when it's just me and both kids. Hopefully by then the baby will be able to go more than a couple hours without eating, and the cluster feeding will be done.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

The Young Marge posted:

I also hate it when peoples' profile pic is a picture of their kid, and I have several friends who do this. Like... cool, you had a baby, aren't you a person anymore? And no, I don't think I'll feel differently after having mine!
I do this, or at least I did about two years ago. I haven't had a good picture of myself in about four years so I haven't bothered to change it yet. I rarely post anything though.

I had to hide my coworker who posts nonstop cutesy anecdotes about her kid. It's especially annoying because she's a super bitch at work. My sister-in-law created a facebook account for my nephew when he was born, and will post as him ("I love you mommy") and respond as herself ("I love you to"). It's all very goofy to me.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

Brennanite posted:

The hospital told me to come in as soon as my waters broke, minus a quick shower, change of clothes and something to eat. Not only do they like to monitor you, but they want to make sure your labor is steadily progressing since any interventions are restricted by the 24 hr limit.
This is how it went with me. I called the hospital when I figured out what was going on, and they said to take a shower and come in. That was at 9-10pm, and I didn't start noticing contractions until about 5 or 6am the next morning. They gave me pitocin and I was ready to push at around 4pm I think.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

Tesla Insanely Coil posted:

Thanks for the answers. Now I have a follow up question - if you go to the hospital early on in your labor, do they stick you in a hospital gown right away? Do you get an IV if everything seems to be going fine?
I'm pretty sure that when I went in and they confirmed it was amniotic fluid, they put me in the gown and at least had me in the bed with the monitor strapped to me. I don't remember when they put the IV in. Either way it was terrible because the bed was extremely uncomfortable and I didn't get any sleep until noon the next day when they put in the epidural. I was probably having back labor though, since the kid turned out to be facing up instead of down. Maybe if I paid more attention I would've realized that earlier and done things differently. I kind of took the "hospital will know what they're doing" approach to my delivery which I'm sure is why I ended up with a c-section.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

We use a very small garbage can with a foot pedal, and use the plastic bags we get from the grocery store. It has to be emptied pretty much daily. We roll up all the diapers and it doesn't really smell unless we open the can. I considered getting a diaper genie, but it sounds like it's a waste of money.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

Did anyone have a retained placenta? Or bleeding (generally light) for more than 6 weeks postpartum? I've been to the doctor and will be scheduling an ultrasound if I'm still bleeding on Monday, which seems very likely at this point.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

I guess I'm very lucky in that we have the only stores around that have decent baby clothes, or I just have lovely taste and don't hate Carter's stuff. Since we didn't find out the sex until birth, we got a lot of ducks and frogs and things and the baby is cute in everything. We like dogs and have a bunch of dog printed stuff, and did the nursery in farm animals, with primary colors and no pink.

The babies don't care what they're wearing, and I don't care much either as long as it's not a pain in the rear end to dress them in it. The baby can sense when something clean is going on and will immediately barf or poo poo through the diaper.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

My birth plan was to have as many pain killers as they would give me. I wasn't so interested in experiencing the birth, and just wanted the baby out. I was in a lot of back pain, and the epidural made it so I could finally sleep for a couple of hours. I ended up with a c-section for reasons that might have been related to the epidural and pain killers or the way the baby was positioned - I don't really know.

With my second, instead of trying for a vbac I just had a scheduled c-section four days before my due date. It was so much easier than the first and I have no regrets. A lot of times it feels like people are so opposed to c-sections unless there's the threat of death or something, but I was never that interested in the actual birth as long as everyone was healthy and happy. And in my opinion my kids couldn't be more of either.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

My husband cried when both daughters were born - probably because they weren't boys. But the oldest is a total daddy's girl now, and he's warming up to the youngest.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

Moms Stuffing posted:

I know you're joking, but this is still really sad. :(
Eh, we didn't find out the sex for either until they were born, so the initial disappointment was understandable. As far as warming up to the baby, he still just doesn't have a clue about crying babies. Once she's a little more interactive, he'll be just fine. He does everything with the oldest, even if I think it's not really a good idea (the park when it looks rainy, the store when she has the sniffles, etc). I'll be in the same room and he'll point out everything she says or does like she just cured cancer.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

My first c-section sucked, because the epidural sucked, the pitocin sucked (my water broke and I wasn't in labor yet), and the hours of pushing and ending up tearing sucked. So I basically recovered from both a c-section and a vaginal birth. And I beat myself up for weeks for not trying hard enough to avoid surgery.

The next c-section was awesome, because I scheduled it ahead of time and just had a spinal block which was way easier than the epidural. I could've tried for a vbac, but I already had the scar and knew what to expect from surgery, so I decided to make things easier on myself. I don't regret it at all.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

netally posted:

The trouble is; I would feel a massive amount of guilt for 'choosing' to have a C section. Would I feel the same bond with the baby afterwards? Would recovery stop me from being a good parent? Am I putting myself at a massive risk of infection or permanent damage? I'm finding this decision so hard.
There is a huge backlash against c-sections these days (and I understand why). After my first, I felt terrible and thought it made me a terrible mother and all that, even though it was an "emergency." I bonded with and took care of the baby just fine, and healed up just fine. My pain meds were extra strength ibuprofen, and once I got home I didn't need them that much. To be honest, the pain from tearing in my attempt to have the baby naturally was worse than the incision pain at first.

I scheduled the second for convenience, because I didn't want to attempt a vbac and go through all the misery of the first birth, and still end up with a c-section anyway. It was just so much more relaxed, and I didn't have any guilt afterwards because I made up my mind ahead of time to do it.

The first time, I spent most of my time at home feeding the baby, so there was plenty of bonding time and not really any issues with recovery. The second was the same, since my husband took care of the toddler. I think I did and am doing an awesome job as a mother. Both my girls are/were very happy and healthy babies, so the c-section birth didn't traumatize them or anything.

I'm not saying everyone should go out and have a c-section, and I wish I could've avoided it the first time around, but they happen and they're not the end of the world. People view giving birth in different ways, from the painful, disgusting thing you have to do to end up with a baby (me), to a sacred event to be treasured and remembered (not me). I don't think either view is right or wrong, nor does it indicate what kind of mother you'll be.

opie fucked around with this message at 15:52 on Dec 21, 2011

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

Gravitee posted:

For those of you considering or already in daycare, do you recommend a place that's closer to your office or home? I'd really like to visit the baby during lunch but it would be more convenient for my husband if it's closer to home. It's slightly more expensive to be closer to my office but my husband is on the road a lot.
Ours is closer to home, although my office isn't very far away. This way it's easier for my husband to do pickups and dropoffs, and when I need to go back home for something, it's close.

I tend to not visit much during the day, because it's hard to leave. The ladies there are very chatty and if my two year old sees me she has a fit.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

bamzilla posted:

Did they not bother trying to measure the sac? If you go in a couple more weeks they can probably get a more accurate measurement based on the size of the embryo/sac, as well. My due date keeps on fluctuating by days but never more than a week. Initially they went by the sac measurement, then the embryo/sac. (making my due date switch from aug 4th, to aug 6th). Now they're going by my last missed period which makes it Aug. 3rd. So now I just tell people I'm due "some time at the beginning of August".
Wasn't your first around Aug 24? My second was also early August (8th). I didn't really want them to have birthdays in the same month and wasn't really trying when we concieved, but August is a pretty good month to have a kid and be on maternity leave.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

I had some stuff about short term disability, but decided that I really should just let it go. Basically I only got a third of what I got from my last leave under the same circumstances, but there's nothing I can do about it now. I guess I just recommend doing your research before taking your leave to maximize your benefit.

My company just hires the lamest people around (myself not included of course). I was working up to and including the day I had my second, because I had to fix my coworker's mess. I just sit on my rear end all day, but it's mentally taxing. Plus it was my last chance at a full night's sleep and I was up until at least midnight working on it. Stupid jerk still screwed it up and I had to rewrite everything once I got back.

opie fucked around with this message at 06:23 on Feb 6, 2012

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

I got a mirena about 12 weeks postpartum, and didn't notice an effect on anything. I had it removed about a year later, and got pregnant with my second right away. I also had a c-section with my first, and had no issues with the second other than a retained placenta, which had to be removed via d&c about 10 weeks postpartum.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

I got a Mirena after my first and it took like 5 minutes and barely hurt at all. A year later I had it removed to have my next kid (conceived in about a month), and got another Mirena after that with the same experience as the first.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

sheri posted:

Thoughts about whether or not to get a flu shot in very early pregnancy/while TTC?
Sounds like a good idea to me. Getting the flu while not really being able to take anything pretty much sucks.

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

ButtonsForEyes posted:

(only because my name is The Most Common Girl's Name Ever
What's really annoying is that having grown up in classes with 3 or 4 other Jennifers in the room, people can't figure out how to spell it. But yeah, I liked the name Olivia but in my youngest's class of about 8 there is an Olivia, Olive, and Oliver. My husband decided on the name Amelia after I said I liked Amy, and later he told me it was a doctor who companion.

In my office of 30 there have been like 7 births in the last 4 years, but only two moms. I was pregnant at the same time as the other lady, and it was awful because it made her want to talk to me and I can't stand her (no one can). Now that I'm done breastfeeding I don't talk to her much at all, and it's nice.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

opie
Nov 28, 2000
Check out my TFLC Excuse Log!

Bad Munki posted:

Well, for us, we definitely will be doing daycare. I just got back from the place, and it looks good. There's one slot in the room she needs, and while she'll probably be graduating out of there fairly soon, the room she's going into has one kid about to graduate into the next, so she can really just get injected into the flow there. I like the place. Lots of staff, everyone's friendly, good clean facilities. Plus, they can take her basically as soon as we can get the paperwork together. Having been there now, I feel a lot better about this. I already knew it would work out, but now I feel like it'll work out.

Thanks, all. :shobon:
Before I had kids I had the opinion that daycare was dumb, and if you have kids you should raise them yourself because they're yours.

Both my kids started daycare at 3 months when my maternity leave ended. It's really expensive, and people have asked why I don't just work from home with the kids there. It's really hard to get anything done even if my husband is here. It's still hard to have them in daycare even if it's been years now. At lunch I drive past it on my way home and back, and feel bad that I'm not with my kids. But they seem to be doing well and get lots of socializing, plus they each get to do things appropriate for their age while it's harder at home because the 1.5 year old isn't old enough for everything the 3.5 year old wants to do, and there's a lot of whining and frustration from both of them. Plus the center has a lot of fun things going on, and the oldest can pretty much read thanks to a phonics class she's in. Even if I could afford to quit and stay at home with them, I'd probably try to work at least part time so they can go a couple days a week.

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply