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MillionsV
Jun 11, 2010


The last Ads You Hate thread was one of my favorite threads on the forums, so I'm delighted to present the all new, re-designed 2011 Ads You Hate thread: Cobalt Edition.

I'll get the hate ball rolling:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zWRFkCUATdM

The McNuggets are the ding. The guy is the dong.

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DJExile
Jun 27, 2007

If loving you is binturong, I don't want to binturight.

The iced tea ads where the lady sees her van frozen over or the guy buys a half gallon of the stuff to drink by himself. Just fine as they are but i cannot loving stand the gulpy sounds they make as they drink it. Probably more just a pet peeve of mine but still.

Parachute
May 18, 2003



There is some commercial on TV with one woman commenting on how another looks like she lost weight. Here is the exchange (roughly):

Woman 1: Yeah I started watching my diet, exercising more, and whole grain.
Woman 2: Whole Grain?
Woman 1: Whole. Grain.

END COMMERCIAL

I saw this again the other day, and they completely removed the snake oil from the ad! It reminds me of those Activia commercials which said that they promote "a healthy digestive system" then once more research was done, it turned out that those claims were not true. Now in these Activia commercials, they pretty much state that their product is a placebo ("I feel better"), and all of the yogurt in the world isn't going to help you poo poo out those McRibs any faster.

piratepilates
Mar 28, 2004

So I will learn to live with it. Because I can live with it. I can live with it.


Teeth whitening commercials are the scourge of the earth. Never before has there been a set of commercials that are so useless, manipulative and outright annoyingly dumb. They all have that same premise of attractive woman looking at their teeth and thinking oh ho hum my teeth just aren't white enough.

Yeah this would be fine if their teeth weren't already the whitest teeth I have ever seen, why does one woman think her teeth aren't white enough when compared to her wedding dress? YOU'RE COMPARING IT TO THE WHITEST THING KNOWN TO MANKIND, OF COURSE IT WON'T STACK UP. Or the woman on her date who thinks the guy won't like her because her teeth aren't white enough, here's a hint: he doesn't give a jack poo poo.

I wouldn't have such a problem if they had actors with non-white teeth or who didn't fret over such stupid poo poo but it's always presented in such a stupid way that it infuriates me.

Sanschel
Aug 9, 2002



Well it's getting to summer and that means more horrible Stop Bugging Me ads here in Washington.

Here's the original: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-Pm...feature=related

The second: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uqm9...feature=related

And the latest: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZiv...feature=related

Mister Kingdom
Dec 14, 2005

And the tears that fall
On the city wall
Will fade away
With the rays of morning light

I really loving hate the MyLife commercials.

Dumbass bitch: Seven people are searching for me? Tee-hee. Seven?

Yes, you stupid cow, they're called stalkers and bill collectors. I hope they find you and hack you to pieces.

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 9, 2007



Since I got the last real post in the last thread I will re post it here.

That loving AT&T commercial with the postponed flash mob is going to give me a stroke.

Oh lol, it's a chubby middle aged white guy doing something wacky! What hijinks will he get up to next?

Aatrek
Jul 19, 2004

by Fistgrrl


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-H_BwyiwbB4&hd=1

I am in love with the McDonalds girl
She has a smile of innocence (ohhh, so tender and warm)
I am in love with the McDonalds girl
She is an angel in a Golden Arches uniform

Aatrek fucked around with this message at Jun 8, 2011 around 00:28

Rhyno
Mar 22, 2003

Coach Bloodshot
Default Status: SHOUTING


Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Since I got the last real post in the last thread I will re post it here.

That loving AT&T commercial with the postponed flash mob is going to give me a stroke.

Oh lol, it's a chubby middle aged white guy doing something wacky! What hijinks will he get up to next?

Anyone in a flash mob deserves to be pushed in front of a moving train.

Mantis42
Jul 26, 2010



I can't find a video of it, but Title Max, a payday loan place, has these "Short On Cash" commercials featuring a dwarf actor that come off as incredibly offensive.

Fiskiggy
Feb 15, 2005

You have impressed FFCiv with your turn time!
They turn a blind eye to the turn times of other civilizations, and your Influence over them has increased by 40.


DJExile posted:

The iced tea ads where the lady sees her van frozen over or the guy buys a half gallon of the stuff to drink by himself. Just fine as they are but i cannot loving stand the gulpy sounds they make as they drink it. Probably more just a pet peeve of mine but still.

Gulpy sounds in ads are always disgusting every single time. I think beer companies use them more frequently than sodas, disgusting in both. Whispering (loudly!) is super annoying as well. You know what, in real life too. Whispering in that... "breathy" way is so dumb, if you want anyone to hear what you're saying, you have to be way louder than you would if you just... talked very softly. gently caress whispers.

Fiskiggy fucked around with this message at Jun 8, 2011 around 00:42

cheese eats mouse
Jul 6, 2007


The Exxon Mobil Oil Sands commercial. It's just outright misleading and if you know anything about oil extraction it's a loving ridiculous commercial.

http://www.exxonmobil.com/Corporate...1_oilsands.aspx

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 9, 2007



cheese eats mouse posted:

The Exxon Mobil Oil Sands commercial. It's just outright misleading and if you know anything about oil extraction it's a loving ridiculous commercial.

http://www.exxonmobil.com/Corporate...1_oilsands.aspx

No you see, oil extraction doesn't totally surprise sex the environment and make it uninhabitable. That's just liberal commie talk.

WescottF1
Oct 21, 2000
Forums Veteran

Now that the awful Toyota kid is finally gone, the ad I'm sick of the most is the phone ad where the woman loses her poo poo over the guy's tarantula picture in the restaurant.

Lee Harvey Oswald
Mar 16, 2007

by exmarx


Ah yes, people are in awe of your lovely, bland food. The frat douche waiter also elevates the hate.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X16DUEEuhNo

Mr. Clark2
Sep 17, 2003

Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.


Any of the many JG Wentworth ads. I hate them all so, so much. Here they are: http://www.youtube.com/jgwentworth

Tupping Liberty
Mar 17, 2008

Never cross an introvert.


Aatrek posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-H_BwyiwbB4&hd=1

I am in love with the McDonalds girl
She has a smile of innocence (ohhh, so tender and warm)
I am in love with the McDonalds girl
She is an angel in a Golden Arches uniform

And you can buy the song on itunes! wooooo!

ElectricSheep
Jan 14, 2006

she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.


Apple iPhone

Yup. If you don't have an iPhone, well...you don't have an iPhone.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=onLYKU-CNhM

Tupping Liberty posted:

And you can buy the song on itunes! wooooo!

It's the program so far up it's own rear end, we've called it "Genius".

But why stop there?

Popeye's Chicken

Time fo' some of that sweeeeeeeet ice tea. Fo' sho'. You'll clean surrender.

I've said it before, the Popeye's commercials are literally a re-write or two away from becoming The General's Fried Chicken commercial from Undercover Brother.

ElectricSheep fucked around with this message at Jun 8, 2011 around 03:04

Gonz
Dec 22, 2009

Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?


McDonalds thought it might be a wise idea to have a woman in their commercial whose body structure resembles that of Brian Urlacher.

DivisionPost
Jun 28, 2006

Nobody likes you.
Everybody hates you.
You're gonna lose.

Smile, you fuck.


Aatrek posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-H_BwyiwbB4&hd=1

I am in love with the McDonalds girl
She has a smile of innocence (ohhh, so tender and warm)
I am in love with the McDonalds girl
She is an angel in a Golden Arches uniform

I didn't click on this (I have embeds set to convert to links) because for some reason I thought I knew what it was. There's a commercial where this cute McDonald's employee uses a Bic Mac (I think) to subtly hit on her male friend who's dealing with his own romance troubles. (He ends up getting too focused on the food to get the picture.)

I thought the song was you being funny.

Then I realized it was too stupid to be fake, so I clicked.



Somebody needs to be taken out back and shot for this.

Acolyte!
Aug 6, 2001

Go! Rocket Kiwi! Go!

I can't find audio, but the Netflix "game show" ads on the radio are the worst.

Here's a question!
Here's a stupid unrelated answer.

Repeat a couple times, then the question is what do you get with a Netflix account and the person lists off features and the nightmare is over... until the next time it comes on.

ElwoodCuse
Jan 11, 2004

we're puttin' the band back together

HH Greg is opening some stores around here for the first time ever. They have this ad playing almost non-stop with a lovely cover of Help! and I think I hate this chain already even though their stores technically aren't even open yet.

maniacripper
May 3, 2009
STANNIS BURNS SHIREEN
HIZDAR IS THE HARPY
JON GETS STABBED TO DEATH
DANY FLIES OFF ON DROGON


Watching any streaming event related to video games in the last month has This Bing ad http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GC2VFcXt3dA

YOOOOO YOOOO YOOOO YEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH


gently caress bing, I will never use it for anything ever again and gently caress that sellout band forever and ever, amen.

maniacripper fucked around with this message at Jun 8, 2011 around 05:49

Toadofsky
Dec 19, 2002

by Y Kant Ozma Post


Acolyte! posted:

I can't find audio, but the Netflix "game show" ads on the radio are the worst.

Here's a question!
Here's a stupid unrelated answer.

Repeat a couple times, then the question is what do you get with a Netflix account and the person lists off features and the nightmare is over... until the next time it comes on.

Those commercials drive me insane.

Bisse
Jun 26, 2005

*gets hit by truck*


Acolyte! posted:

I can't find audio, but the Netflix "game show" ads on the radio are the worst.

Here's a question!
Here's a stupid unrelated answer.

Repeat a couple times, then the question is what do you get with a Netflix account and the person lists off features and the nightmare is over... until the next time it comes on.
"And the last question: How fast can you get access to movies on Netflix?"
"....I-i-i-INSTANTLY!"
DING DING DING "Corrrrect!"
"WOOO HOOABLUABLUAGLAHAHEBLALRGRLRLRLRLRLLLLL"

Yeah, I fuckin hate those too.

Secks
Oct 10, 2002

The city is alive tonight


Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Since I got the last real post in the last thread I will re post it here.

That loving AT&T commercial with the postponed flash mob is going to give me a stroke.

Oh lol, it's a chubby middle aged white guy doing something wacky! What hijinks will he get up to next?

I made the mistake of complaining about that ad to some friends of mine so every time it comes on during a baseball game, I get flooded with texts that say "Flash mob moved to 12:30"

You aren't funny, idiots

piratepilates
Mar 28, 2004

So I will learn to live with it. Because I can live with it. I can live with it.


ElwoodCuse posted:

HH Greg is opening some stores around here for the first time ever. They have this ad playing almost non-stop with a lovely cover of Help! and I think I hate this chain already even though their stores technically aren't even open yet.

Ugh now you've reminded me of that HH Gregg commercial they ran during christmas with a cover of deck the halls only replacing fa la la la la with hh greggg. How does one do this? Well it's exactly as awful as you think it would be http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJzt8L_i7_U

I'm from Canada too so I've never even heard of this place or know what channel I must have been watching to be exposed to this.

404GoonNotFound
Aug 6, 2006

The McRib is back!?!?


Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Since I got the last real post in the last thread I will re post it here.

That loving AT&T commercial with the postponed flash mob is going to give me a stroke.

Oh lol, it's a chubby middle aged white guy doing something wacky! What hijinks will he get up to next?

And who sends a short "hey the meeting's moved" text as one big image attachment? No one, that's who.

Capn Beeb
Jun 29, 2003



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WYS5NtRXlZQ

I wanna sever that head to neck con-nec-shun whenever this garbage plays

E:

An ad for KaBoom/Oxyclean/other poo poo Billy used to pimp that isn't done by Anthony Sullivan can gently caress right off as well.

foastwab
Sep 1, 2009

by XyloJW


Here's a couple terrible local (central Nebraska) commercials that play constantly on ESPN:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XzWQaxdc5oU

MAKE IT RAIN

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WDPBKYejBx0

This couldn't have cost more than 30$ to make, which means they can use the rest of their budget to buy air time.

As for national commercials, any car commercial that spends half their ad telling you how they make better cars than Toyota/Honda/whoever pisses me off. Toyota doesn't spend all their money telling me how bad the Ford Fusion sucks.

fake edit: Speaking of car commercials, this Chevy ad makes me want to vomit:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDRFQHRHGNs

BRINGING HOME HEROES 4EVER BUY OUR CARS!!!!

foastwab fucked around with this message at Jun 8, 2011 around 11:29

raditts
Feb 21, 2001

The Kwanzaa Bot is here to protect me.

Rhyno posted:

Anyone in a flash mob deserves to be pushed in front of a moving train.

I thought this one was pretty funny, but that's pretty much the only one.

ElwoodCuse posted:

HH Greg is opening some stores around here for the first time ever. They have this ad playing almost non-stop with a lovely cover of Help! and I think I hate this chain already even though their stores technically aren't even open yet.

At least you've been spared the ones with a lovely cover of "Get Down Tonight," count your blessings.

raditts fucked around with this message at Jun 8, 2011 around 13:04

ChuckDHead
Dec 18, 2006

Better than expected.


It's probably mostly jealousy, but I have always hated this smug pouty gently caress, and was incredibly glad when Charlie Brooker voted him top in one of his Biggest Cocks In Advertising reviews. Meet Mickey. Hate Mickey.

Then watch Brooker hate Mickey too.

ChuckDHead fucked around with this message at Jun 8, 2011 around 13:35

MillionsV
Jun 11, 2010


ElwoodCuse posted:

HH Greg is opening some stores around here for the first time ever. They have this ad playing almost non-stop with a lovely cover of Help! and I think I hate this chain already even though their stores technically aren't even open yet.

I can't stand ANY HH Greg advertisements, based purely on the mascot. On what planet is a rolled-up advertising circular with the Walmart smile for a head an effective public relations tool?

Fighting Trousers
May 17, 2011

Does this excite you, girl?


That awful Klondike "Five Seconds to Glory" commercial where the man's challenge is to...LISTEN TO HIS WIFE.

Wimminfolk, amirite?

ElwoodCuse
Jan 11, 2004

we're puttin' the band back together

Eh, there are plenty of awful "my husband is an incompetent and dangerous child and needs me to save him from himself" ads too. Marketing and progressive attitudes toward gender don't really go together.

DJExile
Jun 27, 2007

If loving you is binturong, I don't want to binturight.

This is still the best husband/wife ad I've ever seen

discworld is all I read
Apr 7, 2009

DAIJOUBU!! ... Daijoubu ?? ?


maniacripper posted:

Watching any streaming event related to video games in the last month has This Bing ad http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GC2VFcXt3dA

YOOOOO YOOOO YOOOO YEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH


gently caress bing, I will never use it for anything ever again and gently caress that sellout band forever and ever, amen.

Actually Foxy Shazam is pretty amazing; I was a bit depressed the first time I heard Chromeo used in a Burger King ad though or I just saw one with Matt & Kim hocking a car. Sigh, I suppose I can enjoy music without having to know it was ever in a commercial.

Farbtoner
May 17, 2011

by Y Kant Ozma Post


ElwoodCuse posted:

Eh, there are plenty of awful "my husband is an incompetent and dangerous child and needs me to save him from himself" ads too. Marketing and progressive attitudes toward gender don't really go together.

They're not really comparable because the commercials about incompetent dads/husbands are usually talking down to women and pigeonholing them in traditional domestic roles ("Men are just no good at cooking and cleaning, right ladies? Good thing they have us, and the new Mister Clean Magic Eraser! ") while the ones about nagging wives are usually from the perspective of the husband tolerating them from a position of superiority.

It's the gender equivalent of complaining about how black people can say "cracker".

ElwoodCuse
Jan 11, 2004

we're puttin' the band back together

I'm not excusing either of them, I'm just not surprised any more that companies go that route.

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osukeith161
Dec 19, 2004

by Y Kant Ozma Post


Mercedes Benz E-Class Commercial

You guys all know it. It is the one where every single one of those rich drivers should have killed themselves while driving, but their car saved them. Not a goddamn one of them takes any personal responsibility.
"My car got my attention, telling me that I wasn't paying attention."
"I had no idea the guy in front me stopped short."
"I was literally falling asleep behind the wheel."

Every single one of those drivers should lose their license indefinitely until they realize how much of a danger they are to others on the road. Instead, because they have money, Mercedes panders to the don't-have-to-give-a-poo poo demographic who think that they are better than everyone else. It is the most infuriating ad on television.

Also, Hyuandi and Pomplamosse. I will never, ever purchase one of your cars. That campaign ruined your brand.

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