The bing to the McNugget bong, the ding to the dong: Ads You Hate.

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > TV IV > The bing to the McNugget bong, the ding to the dong: Ads You Hate.

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ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Apple iPhone

Yup. If you don't have an iPhone, well...you don't have an iPhone.

:smug:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=onLYKU-CNhM

Tupping Liberty posted:

And you can buy the song on itunes! wooooo!

It's the program so far up it's own rear end, we've called it "Genius".

But why stop there?

Popeye's Chicken

Time fo' some of that sweeeeeeeet ice tea. Fo' sho'. You'll clean surrender.

I've said it before, the Popeye's commercials are literally a re-write or two away from becoming The General's Fried Chicken commercial from Undercover Brother.

ElectricSheep fucked around with this message at 04:04 on Jun 8, 2011

# ¿ Jun 8, 2011 03:56

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 16:44

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Smegma Enigma posted:

I can't be the only one who had never heard of Magnum ice cream and thought the first 20 seconds of this commercial were about a chick day-dreaming about a truck driver's giant dick.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lUEeEUAju3Q

You're not far off. The imagery is intentionally evocative of everything you think of when you think of the word "Magnum" (condom not gun).

# ¿ Jun 10, 2011 22:45

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Attention advertising executives:

Having to listen to anybody chew on or suck down food by way of a boom mic is gross and doesn't encourage me to want to buy your product.

I know you're trying to convince me that the actors/actresses are supposed to be enjoying the food, but really it's just reminiscent of Andrew Zimmern trying to talk around giant mouthfuls of food in Bizarre Foods. Unlike that show, your commercial probably isn't hocking half-rotted chicken embryos that have been buried for nearly a month before they're consumed. That doesn't make it any less gross.

That being said, gently caress everyone responsible for this Kit Kat ad campaign. It strikes this primal font of irritation and anger in me; nails on a chalkboard or balloon rubbing doesn't bother me, but the sound of chewing and crunching drives me up a wall.

# ¿ Jun 19, 2011 04:00

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Yeah, I suppose I should've clarified

ElectricSheep posted:

You're not far off. The imagery is intentionally evocative of everything you think of when you think of the word "Magnum" (condom not gun).

that I didn't mean condoms specifically a little better, but the fact of the matter is that the commercial's about as subtle with its sexual imagery as an Axe ad.

# ¿ Jun 26, 2011 18:10

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Cruxxed Up posted:

Goldfish bread.

"Actually, it's peanut butter and JELLLLLLYYYYYYYYY."

It's everywhere. I hate it so much. Why is the giant obnoxious goldfish's voice British? Why is it on every commercial break and WHY is it on every other station I watch.

IF it makes you feel any better, it's a lovely product. When you try to pull the halves apart, the curved cut line that forms the "mouth" rips apart and ruins the bread.

# ¿ Aug 28, 2011 02:46

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

moleman posted:

This Chevy commercial is quite possible the worst I've ever seen. I honestly thought it was a joke the first time I watched it. Terrible acting, terrible camera work, terrible audio issues...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rvnohA-sdNo

Unsurprisingly, it's got a lot of REAL MUHRICANS staunchly defending it in the Youtube comments. :911:

# ¿ Aug 31, 2011 05:10

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Pink's "Raise Your Glass" is one of the most obnoxious songs I've heard in months, and now it's running in the background of no less than 3 commercials right now.

It's become such a bad earworm that I've woken up two mornings in a row with that drat song as the first thought that enters my mind and the last thing I remember before I go to sleep.

# ¿ Sep 21, 2011 05:27

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

404GoonNotFound posted:

Don't forget the bitchiest daughter ever in the latest eBay ad

Here's contestant #1

404GoonNotFound posted:

or the slow descent into RINGDINGADINGRINGDINGADING madness that is Wal-Mart's current campaign.

and contestant #2.

The eBay ad had both my wife and I yelling at the TV after about 15 seconds of that incessant bullshit the girl was spewing. Jesus, doesn't anyone actually watch these things or put them through some sort of QA before they foist them upon us?

# ¿ Nov 11, 2011 06:05

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Combo posted:

I keep seeing that Verizon commercial with the couple on a date, and the guy keeps checking his phone to get updates on the game while she's trying to talk.

Is it me or is it the same woman that was in the "Centipedes? In my vagina?" photoshop thing a while back?

Trying to find a video on youtube but not pulling up anything, maybe it isn't verizon.

edit: oh I was wrong, it was AT&T

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SqxcrVOS47s

TV girl has a wider face, and a mole on right cheek.

# ¿ Dec 5, 2011 18:12

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

That commercial for St. Ives lotion just annoys the poo poo out of me now, and it's probably a combination of it being obnoxiously twee and playing all the drat time.

# ¿ Jan 4, 2012 04:14

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

^^Fantasy. Trucks can't snowboard. Do not attempt.^^

ElwoodCuse posted:

There's a new commercial for those sleazy bullshit commerative coins and they've hit a new low--the 9/11 and combination "we killed osama bin laden" coin that also comes with a pile of poo poo that makes the manual to a Call of Duty game look like a David McCollough book.

It really is abominable how they market these things.

I have a commercial for the "Justice Coin" here but I don't think it's the exact same commercial we're thinking of here. Same concept, though.

# ¿ Jan 19, 2012 04:44

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Mister Kingdom posted:

I really want to smack the Gazelle lady with an old iPhone.

There's something really obnoxious about her delivery but I just can't put my finger on it.

On the other hand she kind of reminds me of Sabrina from Raising Hope, so I'm kind of torn about how I feel.

# ¿ Jan 25, 2012 04:59

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Since I've seen a couple of radio ads dropped in here: if I can help it I will never, ever fill a prescription for Tamiflu ever. It starts with a man coughing, then hoarsely whispering for the entire commercial in a register that annoys me in a way I just can't describe.

All I know is that as soon as my brain realizes the commercial's playing, my arm shoots forward almost involuntarily and hits a different radio preset.

# ¿ Mar 1, 2012 06:23

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Rirse posted:

I suggest when we make the next thread that the title be about Go Daddy, because I don't think they have ever had a single good ad. Everyone of their commercials has been awful, non stop.

Well, obviously you didn't get to see the UNRATED CONTENT on their website that they can't show you on TV!

...ridiculous as that line is, it delivered hits to the site and probably continues to do so.

# ¿ Mar 20, 2012 02:36

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

I'm getting pretty tired of Depot Time.

All I really know about Depot Time is that the clock hits Depot Time on pretty much every commercial break so that Tony Stewart and some helium-voiced blonde can tell me that it's Depot Time.

_{depot time}

# ¿ Mar 22, 2012 06:07

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

TontoCorazon posted:

Oh holy gently caress kitkat commercials suck so loving much.

Chewing/drinking/slurping sounds are incredibly unappetizing to me, e.g.:
- KitKat commercials;
- York Peppermint Patty commercials that are aping Requiem for a Dream;
- Taco Bell commercials with the guy sucking his Dorito Loco Taco-stained fingers;
- Any radio commercial for a soda, ever;

and some others I'm sure I've missed. I don't know who likes these things or what focus groups ad companies find that are cool with hearing or watching people eat and drink.

Yet somehow I've always liked this commercial.

# ¿ Jun 28, 2012 17:42

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Having a Top Chef Masters also-ran try to convince me that Taco Bell is selling food that's either a)authentic or b)good somehow winds up being more annoying than KFC's or Quizno's attempts to make me believe that they employ "chefs" too.

I don't know. Maybe it's because she went to the Sofia Vergara School of Elocution.

# ¿ Oct 18, 2012 02:00

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Rhyno posted:

The new Old Navy commercials are pretty amazing. They got Chevy Chase, Beverly D'angelo and Juliette Lewis to stand around for 45 seconds and hope someone out there remembers the movie they were in together.

I think it's ironic that Chevy Chase was recently bashing sitcoms (and by extension, Community) as being one of the lowest forms of entertainment. Now he's in an Old Navy commercial.

I guess being an rear end in a top hat your entire life won't pay the bills.

# ¿ Nov 26, 2012 18:48

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Looks like they replaced the music in those K-mart commercials (thelightsthelightsthelights) with modern covers of Christmas songs. I only noticed it today, but I wondered if it was a total replacement of the commercials or not.

# ¿ Dec 13, 2012 05:56

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Shaman Ooglaboogla posted:

I maintain the worst commercials ever are the one's that heavily feature the sounds of ingestion or digestion. The worst ad ever was for Sunkist on the radio that features really enhanced sounds of someone slurping up Sunkist out of the can and gulping that poo poo noisily down their gullet. Finished off by a horrid "ahhh" noise that no one wants to hear. I almost decided to crash my car off the cliff in anger from this soda ad.

Kit-Kat commercials are the absolute worst for this.

# ¿ Apr 3, 2013 14:11

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

muscles like this? posted:

Except she totally does show up in their commercials? They have two sets, one with fake Wendy and one with real Wendy.

Real Wendy looks like she has a severe case of lockjaw whenever she talks.

Words come out, her cheeks puff with air, but...nothing much seems to happen with her mouth. It's creepy.

# ¿ May 21, 2013 23:52

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Wow, I haven't seen that since I was in middle school. Good times.

# ¿ Jul 24, 2013 03:13

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

I don't know what it is but the song from this Prius commercial makes me want to channel Elvis and shoot the TV every time it comes on. Which is often.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFIYlDEpLcQ

I'm not sure who to blame for the commercialization of annoying indie quirk. Maybe the movie Juno. Or Zooey Deschanel.

# ¿ Aug 5, 2013 05:46

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Rirse posted:

Really hate the car commercial where it switch between various bad music with a bunch of people dancing in the street.

Dancing in the street?

# ¿ Sep 13, 2013 22:51

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

I don't necessarily know if it's an ad I hate, but watching an A-list star go from starring roles to Nyquil commercials in the span of a couple of years is worth a mention.

# ¿ Sep 20, 2013 01:18

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Not that I was a fan of AT&T's commercials before (and I can actually tolerate some of their "interview the schoolchildren ads") but are they just stuck on running the same drat one now as often as possible?

And what place are you in?
...Kindergarten!

# ¿ Dec 11, 2013 02:38

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

StormDrain posted:

I've had enough of the M&Ms meeting Santa.

I saw the Campbell's soup ad a few times already, the one with the snowman eating soup and melting to reveal the child underneath; I'm reasonably sure that predates even the M&M commercial.

# ¿ Dec 18, 2013 04:28

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Brian Moser posted:

What's so wrong with white people that I constantly hear Taco Bell ruins their insides? Is it serious, or is it a joke reference to a movie or cultural zeitgeist piece of humour? Here's a hint, if you stop eating canned food and mayo out of jars, you'll be able to handle Real World Food, and hell maybe even leave the country and eat Other Stuff, too!

It's probably because Taco Bell meat is made of grade Z chicken asses and/or pulverized meat from retired dairy cows.

# ¿ Jan 27, 2014 04:01

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

ElwoodCuse posted:

The new Cadillac commercial is one of the douchiest, smuggest things I've ever seen (yes, even from Apple) but considering who drives Cadillacs they probably hit a bullseye

They cast Neal McDonough for it. I'm pretty sure that "smarmy douche" is the angle they were going for.

# ¿ Feb 19, 2014 02:58

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

ElwoodCuse posted:

There's this match dot com ad where some guy whines about how this girl he liked dated someone else before he could do the "conversion". Is that godawful PUA poo poo or does it just sound like it?

Perhaps he's a Scientologist.

# ¿ Jul 21, 2014 02:06

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Mahoning posted:

Oh my, there is an awful commercial for one of those lovely Surface laptops comparing it to a MacBook. It sounds like some fatass that can't carry a tune is changing the words to Winter Wonderland on the fly and singing about how the MacBook can't do all this poo poo that nobody wants their laptop to do anyways. It's terrible.

Describing a car wreck isn't nearly as good as slowing down to watch it yourself
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H5_CrXh227Q

# ¿ Nov 27, 2014 04:33

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

AT&T has always been pro tier for poo poo commercials and I know the internet in general likes to nerd out over the new ones with the cute salesgirl but

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_74315l2yss

gggggggghhhh just gently caress this, it's so drat obnoxious

# ¿ Dec 20, 2014 02:39

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Taco Bell's still riding that whole "counterculture breakfast" horse pretty hard:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQcz32s_2IA

What really kills me is how she pronounces the word "taco" and does it several times over.

TAAAAHHHHCOOOOOOOWWWWHHHH

# ¿ Aug 3, 2015 22:59

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

DerekSmartymans posted:

There's more than one and they're all good. I love it when an ad actually makes the product seem like a good buy just to support the company for doing a good job.

I love Old Spice b/c of Terry Cruise's commercials, for instance :-).

But I like Isaiah Mustafa too.

Why not both?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_hWeN249fs

Also in the vein of competing mascots, I realized that KFC's latest ad wasn't actually a fever dream I had:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=er_owYCDZUk

^^efb^^ Well, the link's here for anyone interested.

# ¿ Aug 17, 2015 03:56

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

SpacePig posted:

That shrug just loving killed me. Oh my god, what a perfect use of Norm.

# ¿ Aug 17, 2015 04:21

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

computer parts posted:

That's actually appropriate considering it's University of Phoenix.

This commercial is obnoxious as gently caress, esp because I know a coworker who now receives a doctoral stipend and the Ph.D was through Phoenix which is kinda galling on a few levels

# ¿ Mar 3, 2016 01:43

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

FetusSlapper posted:

I don't have a problem with Cookie Monster but the new ad he's in asking siri to set a timer activates the siris on my ipod and ipad when they're supposed to be doing perk stuff.

All this tells me is that you sound like Cookie Monster irl

# ¿ Mar 27, 2016 12:45

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Mister Kingdom posted:

There's really no good reason Sony can't revisit him as the VP of Marketing

# ¿ May 7, 2016 02:47

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

They dragged George Hamilton off of his tanning bed to take a run at Colonel Sanders.

# ¿ Jun 28, 2016 01:15

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# ¿ Apr 25, 2024 16:44

ElectricSheep: Jan 14, 2006; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Gaunab posted:

I'm not sure why Burger King is using douchebags to try and sell their burgers.

It works at their restaurants

# ¿ Oct 24, 2016 05:02

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > TV IV > The bing to the McNugget bong, the ding to the dong: Ads You Hate.

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