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Welp, I just powered through all five books recently, AND read this entire thread. My ultimate conclusion is this: Victarion is the best character.
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Aug 10, 2011 17:46
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Quantify! posted:No he doesn't die from the fire, instead he drowns because he always wears heavy armor on his boat. He'd just rise again (that which is already dead can never die, etc.) with a water arm from the Drowned God to go along with his fire arm. Then he'd offer tributes to the other gods and get corresponding limbs from them as well. Like a weirwood leg from the Old Gods and... nothing from the Seven because they don't seem to have any real magic. Then he'd be like the Fantastic 4/Super Skrull. GRRM loves pop culture references like that, right?
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Aug 10, 2011 18:50
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I was under the impression that it was similar chicken pox. Not as dangerous in children, but fatally dangerous in adults. I assumed that the disease had run its course in Shireen and she was just left with "pock marks." The Maesters say she is alright. Of course, maybe the Wildlings have more knowledge of it. Perhaps the greyscale is just dormant in Shireen and she's a walking time-bomb of a disease vector.
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Aug 11, 2011 06:23
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Ever since the reveal of the dragon-binding horn in AFfC, I've had this suspicion that Euron was going to wind up as THE major threat. I mean, there seems to be this theme of the world (Westeros) underestimating the Ironborn. It's like, ever since the first Greyjoy rebellion was quashed no one takes them serious anymore, and yet they keep fuckin' poo poo up. Most factions are too preoccupied with who rules the Iron Throne, and all the related intrigue that goes with it. The big threat to the throne is probably going to be whoever brings over the dragons. I know the general expectation is that Victarion is going to gently caress up with the horn and Dany will bind the dragons, or whatever, but I feel it'd be more inline with GRRM to NOT play into our expectations and have the Ironborn succeed in getting a dragon or two. As much as medieval politicking is cool, I think it'd be totally rad/hilarious for Euron or Victarion to come riding in on loving dragons and blow poo poo up. Maybe in the middle of a big stupid feast, or a small council meeting too. It'd be akin to some rear end in a top hat running into a room and knocking over a house of cards that someone had spent hours trying to build.
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Aug 11, 2011 06:52
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TheFatController posted:He refers to himself as a 'holy man' a few times who doesnt need to fear the others, implying there is a religion which is on the side of the others, I wonder if it's one of the one's we've met so far and if that's going to be a big reveal next book.. It's the Seven. The Others are the physical manifestation of the aspect of the Stranger, and they're out for blood because not enough people pay homage to him/her/it. The threat to the world is ended when all people in Westeros put aside their differences and pray to the Stranger for forgiveness. Appeased, the Stranger and the Others will disappear from the world. Nothing about dragons, or wargs, or prophecies will wind up mattering in the least.
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Aug 22, 2011 17:50
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Unzip and Attack posted:That's an interesting theory. I've always thought the Stranger was the least thought-out of the religious ideas presented in Martin's writing, but maybe I was wrong. Then again, if all that's required is a bunch of prayers, why did the Night's Watch build the Wall and safeguard it all these years? When the Children and First Men defeated the Others last go-round, there wasn't even a Faith of the Seven around if memory serves. Since gods are immortal, they don't perceive time the same way mortals do. The Children of the Forest and the First Men lucked the gently caress out when they used their combined forces/magic/giant-gently caress-off-walls to beat the Others. Enraged by their affront to him, the Stranger would marshal his forces for a second wave - thousands of years later. Only for the Stranger, it felt like the blink of an eye. The cycle will continue until people join hands and pray for forgiveness from the Other; their armies will never be able to ultimately triumph over the Stranger and her/her/its Others. (Or it's just a silly joke theory. I never thought the Stranger was the least thought out, just the most ignored. The Stranger is a Charon-like figure who is meant to take people to whatever heaven the Seven have when they die. I figure that because the Stranger has so little to with actually LIVING, people only pray to it when they are near death. I always thought it strange that there were never more candles devoted to the Stranger during the war. I mean, I get that most warriors don't expect to die, and so they pray to the Warrior or Smith for bravery and good steel, but why not pray to the Stranger as well asking for it to leave them alone for a few more years, or let them see the morning after the battle, etc.)
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Aug 23, 2011 02:24
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YES bread posted:he genital area look like a flayed dishrag  Is this the bad thread now?
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Oct 16, 2011 01:30
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There is a low "things happening" to "page count" ratio in AFFC and ADWD. Whereas the first three novels felt very dense and exciting, the most recent two feel bloated and somewhat boring. I feel A Feast For Crows and A Dance With Dragons would be more enjoyable reads if they were edited and combined into one book called A Feast For Crows.
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Nov 2, 2011 05:13
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Simon Draskovic posted:Which zooms out to show Gurm on a toilet, licking a grease globe marked "Pizza Rolls". This is more realistic.
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Nov 4, 2011 06:24
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Blade_of_tyshalle posted:The comet/meteor everyone was sperging about earlier in the series! When it crashes into the world, it will explode and cover the planet in phazon dust. Sansa will have to don an ancient suit of armour from the Arryns and run around the ruins of Westeros trying to repair her ship while fighting off Lannister troops subjected to bizarre experiments (oh no, Omega Clegane!) and eventually having a fight atop a temple against a robotic version of Petyr Baelish who is vulnerable to plasma shots, before descending into the meteor crater to deal with a giant Cersei. This is wonderful. 
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Nov 28, 2011 05:42
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SteepleJack posted:I'm outta here, though. This whole thread doesn't seem constructive. I felt compelled to write some stuff in response to your stuff, but not anymore. What a waste. See you around.
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Dec 9, 2011 08:33
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SammyWhereAreYou posted:I'm pretty sure most of us are exaggerating our hatred of the book and of GRRM for the sake of humor. Saying "Dance wasn't terrible but it wasn't that great either. I'm slightly disappointed but it's just a book and it's not really that important to me" isn't particularly fun or funny. It's a lot more fun to act like Dance is worse than AIDS. I've received more enjoyment following this thread than I have reading AFFC and ADWD. Not to say I didn't enjoy either of those books to some extent, because I did, but this thread is hilarious and I love seeing the books' faults blown up into absurd proportions. Plus, a lot of the fanboy defense in favour of GRRM, AFFC, and ADWD is insane. Like, extreme FF7 fanboy insane. I mean, the books were pretty decent and better than a lot of other fantasy out there, but come on, they're not the second coming of
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Dec 10, 2011 03:50
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Simon Draskovic posted:Basically, this. When a novel has "BOOK ONE" or "VOLUME ONE" plastered on the cover, the reader buys it understanding that it is not the full/finished product, and has the reasonable expectation that the author will deliver the rest of the series. It's not a novel, but man am I pissed about this movie. I have been waiting for the teased Part II to come out for-loving-ever.
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Dec 12, 2011 06:49
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my cat is norris posted:I think Melisandre said something about sharing his bed in one of her POVs. Or...someone said that. But it was never specifically stated they had sex. They were probably just hot bunking.
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Jan 10, 2012 00:07
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Stannis is a secret Unsullied. He shares a bed with Melisandre so that he can just lie next to her and hold her.
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Jan 11, 2012 19:11
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whowhatwhere posted:e: Also you guys are forgetting her bleeding from menstruation/miscarriage while making GBS threads. I wish I could forget the whole book.
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Feb 7, 2012 09:17
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General Battuta posted:Half Life 3 (nee Half Life 2 Episode 3) Haha, awesome. If Half-Life 3 was built off of Dark Souls' engine, that would be soooo cool. Though I can't imagine it being very hard - the combine would still be pretty easy to kill, I bet.
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Feb 9, 2012 22:36
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Azure_Horizon posted:No, what I said was that the battle would take up the whole episode, I didn't say that it would be all loving fighting. That's not what mind the walrus was saying either, they said, "your language made it sound as though we'll have 60 minutes of shots of ships firing on each other." Your inference wasn't clear, no need to get bent out of shape about it.
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Feb 16, 2012 21:26
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Tony Danza Claus posted:I love your doe-eyed innocence, you Bambi-rear end TVIV chumps. I was one of those chumps last season. The HBO viewer's guide had enough hints in it for me to come up with the idea that Jon Snow was Rhaegar's son with Eddard's sister, and I thought I was the cleverest bastard for coming up with it. I was probated for my speculation, and was pretty bummed out because I figured I had been spoiled because of it. I broke down and read all of the books during the break, and was pretty upset to find out that nothing ever really comes of Jon Snow's parentage. After finishing AFFC and ADWD, I felt empty inside, like I had been cheated of my time and money. Then I started reading the Bad Thread, and everything made sense again. Now I look at the people in the TVIV No-Spoiler thread, and am filled with happiness and sorrow. Happiness, because I am no longer a part of that mess, and sorrow, because I read their speculation and anticipate their utter disappointment. No, wait, sorrow is the wrong word--more like, joy. The Rains of Castamere will be made up of the tears of the posters in the TVIV No-Spoiler thread.
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Apr 3, 2012 03:16
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Azure_Horizon posted:Oh JOY, another person who hates the last two novels. How exciting. Eh, I don't hate them (never said I did), I just feel like they were a waste of my time and money. Given some of my previous posts I don't think it's at all surprising I came to that conclusion.
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Apr 3, 2012 08:44
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Junkenstein posted:The other funny thing about the TVIV thread is that it's so strict with bans, if someone does speculate correctly, they'll probably be assumed to be posting spoilers so will get banned. Therefore any speculation that doesn't end in a ban is essentially proven wrong. Heh, yeah, happened to me last season (well, probated). Then I read the books and got out of Dodge.
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Apr 4, 2012 17:46
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Sophia posted:bigmcgaffney is trolling them. bigmcgaffney posted:From first glance I think Dolorous Edd is probably gay, will be interesing to see how he develops into more than just a black Eeyore. hahahahahaaa!
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Apr 5, 2012 05:55
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bigmcgaffney posted:No trolling there either, it will be interesting how they spin the Edd/Jon/Sam dynamics, and how they portray a non-sterotypical gay man in the medium. Hopefully no different than anyone else, and I'd be pretty thrilled if they held back from adding a non-book gay sex scene for him. Dude's gay, no big deal. It's the TVIV thread. They've only seen this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3pLxri6Aofs&t=0m31s So you must be very perceptive!
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Apr 5, 2012 06:53
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I don't believe in the GRRM anymore. I'm too old to believe in fairy tales. I used to leave lemoncakes under my pillow at night, hoping that GRRM would come and take it away, leaving a new Song of Ice and Fire in its place. But it never comes. I only ever find Wild Cards and pizza sauce wiped on the sheets.
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Apr 6, 2012 18:06
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Tony Danza Claus posted:
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Apr 7, 2012 23:17
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nwin posted:Bran If you could call that living.
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Apr 7, 2012 23:35
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Maybe people are just spelling "Sirsay" wrong on purpose. You know, to be annoying or something.
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Apr 10, 2012 09:21
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Contra Calculus posted:Y-y-you actually dislike something? What planet am I on? Whatever planet A Song of Ice and Fire takes place on.
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Apr 11, 2012 04:14
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Krinkle posted:They aren't making jaqen memorable enough, nobody is going to recognize him when they reintroduce him again in a few. He's supposed to have red hair with a white streak in it right? People will remember him because he's the only weirdo around Arya who talks in 3rd-person.
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Apr 16, 2012 17:16
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crazypeltast52 posted:Ah ok. I intend to post the first use of absolute fucker when I reach it, possibly more details as they emerge. Hopefully my thread archeology isn't detracting too much from regular book discussion, the Giants winning the Super Bowl prompted a more muted reaction in that thread compared to now, but GRRM did make a blog post about his heart stopping multiple times that game and the reactions were of actual concern before delving into fury at the upcoming 6 month of not writing. Robert Jordan's death also occurs in that thread with actual sympathy for GRRM's loss of a friend and views the people referencing his own impending demise with a bit of distaste. I have no intention of doing thread archeology myself, so please, post the hilarious ramblings and hopes of the proto-bad thread.
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Apr 17, 2012 08:58
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The TVIV thread is now entertaining a discussion on who the best swordsman of the realm is. Most people have it down to arguing between Jaime and Barristan. Fools, if only the knew the skill of ~~~***D*a*r*k*s*t*a*r***~~~.
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Apr 24, 2012 04:01
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Fort McMurray's a dump. I hate it, and I will never visit it again: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OodRu_laGwc Some other videos about how Ft. McMurray is a dump. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YkwoRivP17A&feature=related http://www.pembina.org/oil-sands/video/oil-sands-fever This one is probably the most interesting. It's a photo essay on an oil spill in Lubicon Cree territory, which is West of Ft. McMurray, but it has some pretty surreal photos. Like, rivers are literally black: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qz3nSscXamI Sally fucked around with this message at 03:18 on Apr 27, 2012 |
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Apr 27, 2012 03:00
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Blade_of_tyshalle posted:I start discounting someone's opinion whenever they compare stuff to Shakespeare. I don't mind his plays, though they pretty much require a pamphlet to comprehend, and it's just baffling that, for instance, every love story is held up against Romeo and Juliet; that's not a story that ends well, and anyone who's passingly familiar with the material should know it. I'm sorry if you feel that way, but Shakespeare isn't that hard to comprehend. I mean, if you want to understand every cultural and literary reference then yes, cliff notes sure are useful (though this is the case with anything, really), but the stories themselves are pretty universal. Also, it's not really baffling that everyone compares stuff to Shakespeare. His themes are, again, pretty universal, and he is such a major figure in the English literary canon that pretty much everyone has at least heard of him and are thus able to make comparisons to his work in an attempt to sound cultured/educated.
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May 4, 2012 06:29
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SpaceMost posted:Part of the pleasure of Shakespeare is the language, and the games he plays with language. A lot of the cleverness is lost if you translate to modern English. Admittedly, that requires some level of familiarity with the work, and some comfort with Elizabethan English (which doesn't take as much effort as you might think) -- but it's no more spergy than saying flag football has no place in the NFL. I agree. If you're having a lot of trouble understanding it, you either have a poor translation or aren't really trying--if it's the latter, I understand. Not everyone likes Shakespeare, and it's hard to motivate yourself to learn something if you don't like it. Still, that fact doesn't make Shakespeare nearly incomprehensible for modern readers; that's just nonsense. Shakespeare is supposed to be filled with elaborate prose, verse, and thous/thys. It's what people expected back then (they didn't really speak in blank verse), and it's what people expect in Shakespeare now. It's meant to sound all weird and put on and over elaborate. But yeah, whoever said watching a Shakespeare play was easier because the actors did all the work for you is bang on. It's a huge disservice to what Shakespeare was trying to do if you only READ his works. Also, Austen is kind of dull, and her works are kind of bloated. To be fair, most Victorian era novels were anyways.
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May 5, 2012 23:45
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DirtyRobot posted:Austen isn't a Victorian. My copy of Pride and Prejudice is, like, 300 pages. Northanger Abbey is less than 200. Compare that to, say, Clarissa or Tom Jones. Right, I confused her with Bronte. Still- Arnold of Soissons posted:Something can be noteworthy, innovative and groundbreaking, but still not very good or enjoyable by modern standards. Also, a book can have a low page count and still be bloated. It's all in the way it's written, man. Sally fucked around with this message at 00:45 on May 6, 2012 |
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May 6, 2012 00:38
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Urdnot Fire posted:And instead of vagina-monsters, their prophetess shits hers out, much to the dismay of DavOther. At this point, I would be completely unfazed if that happened.
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May 18, 2012 06:55
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Rattleshirt looks more badass than I pictured him in the books. Wasn't he just a scrawny chump?
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May 22, 2012 08:00
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Alfred P. Pseudonym posted:You were also impressed by Osmund Kettleblack and Moon Boy, for all we know. The Kettleblacks, and their interactions with Cersei in King's Landing, were the most engaging parts of AFFC and ADWD. Well, almost the most engaging. That honour goes to the political machinations of Hizdhar zo Loraq and Skahaz mo Kandaq in Meereen.
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May 31, 2012 07:03
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"I skipped that scene the first time round because I read on the train and am a little uncomfortable with reading sex scenes in public," said Rape Jake.
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May 31, 2012 08:04
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Tony Danza Claus posted:
This. Is. Amazing. Somebody make this work for TDC.
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Jun 1, 2012 03:41
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