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There's some German guy who posts videos on YouTube where he talks about his misunderstandings of American idioms and slang. He also watches Game of Thrones and posts a synopsis video of each episode from Season 3, which someone else then animates. I don't know how much of it is real and how much is a Borat-shtick, but his GoT synopses feature Bad Thread favorites such as mangling of Joffrey's name, discussion of lemoncakes and Tyrone Lannister. Episode 1 synopsis: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Xt6tUyn3XQ
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Jun 25, 2013 19:08
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| # ¿ May 16, 2024 12:16 |
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HELLO LADIES posted:unfortunately, Dany totally will go crazy and be evil in the books. I don't see what's unfortunate about it. She's been boring in the books pretty much since the dragons were born. Making her Targ-crazy is the only way to make her even sort of interesting again.
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May 12, 2015 01:06
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One of my favorite things about Barristan is the way he takes his squiring job seriously when he's posing as Arstan. He's the greatest living swordsman and pretty much a legend in his own lifetime, yet when he has to take on a job as a squire, he doesn't half-rear end it or think that he's above this lowly station. He takes his job as squire as seriously as he took his job as a knight and keeps Strong Belwas' poo poo immaculate.
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May 14, 2015 00:49
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syscall girl posted:Refresh my memory about how chivalrous Barristan was being while Sansa was being tortured in court? Barristan was gone by the time Sansa was being tortured. Cersei tried to "retire" him and he told her to gently caress off and left. He was no longer Kingsguard from that point on.
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May 14, 2015 00:50
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savinhill posted:they even got me to like the tv humorless version of Tormund with that episode. Hey, he did say that Jon was pretty. Har.
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Jun 1, 2015 07:39
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OhYeah posted:I don't know why the words "hundreds of blades" stuck with me, I vaguely remember reading something along these lines the books. Still more than four. Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:The relevant sentence is "Valyrian steel blades were scarce and costly, yet thousands remained in the world, perhaps two hundred in the Seven Kingdoms alone." - you did see that. I think GRRM's "problem understanding numbers" comes in to play when talking about the scarcity of Valyrian steel. He claims that there are a few hundred / few thousand, but at the same time claims that they're scarce enough that all the gold of Casterly Rock can't buy one. The Lannisters have been trying to buy one for a very long time, and haven't been able to get anyone willing to part with one for any price. The Lannisters also have some guy who knows how to melt down existing Valyrian steel and reforge it into a new shape. That guy has to have had stuff to experiment with and practice on in order to learn how to do it. Where did he get his stuff? 
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Jun 1, 2015 19:39
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Tyrion wondered where the metal for this one had come from. A few master armorers could rework old Valyrian steel, but the secrets of its making had been lost when the Doom came to old Valyria. “The colors are strange,” he commented as he turned the blade in the sunlight. Most Valyrian steel was a grey so dark it looked almost black, as was true here as well. But blended into the folds was a red as deep as the grey. The two colors lapped over one another without ever touching, each ripple distinct, like waves of night and blood upon some steely shore. “How did you get this patterning? I’ve never seen anything like it.” “Nor I, my lord,” said the armorer. “I confess, these colors were not what I intended, and I do not know that I could duplicate them. Your lord father had asked for the crimson of your House, and it was that color I set out to infuse into the metal. But Valyrian steel is stubborn. These old swords remember, it is said, and they do not change easily. I worked half a hundred spells and brightened the red time and time again, but always the color would darken, as if the blade was drinking the sun from it. And some folds would not take the red at all, as you can see. If my lords of Lannister are displeased, I will of course try again, as many times as you should require, but—” -Storm of Swords.
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Jun 1, 2015 20:20
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A GLISTENING HODOR posted:They melted Ice. Valyrian steel can be melted and reforged. Tobho Mott says he used a bunch of spells to rework it, so it should be at least kinda magical. Though where he would learn spells from is another mystery.
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Jun 1, 2015 21:43
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So what's the opinion about how differently Myrcella's storyline will play out in the books as compared to the show? Obviously it's going to be different, but I had always assumed Tommen would die before she did. Does the "gold will be their crowns" prophecy mean she's going to actually be Queen at some point, or is being a princess enough to meet that requirement?
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Jun 16, 2015 04:40
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CaptainRightful posted:Someone wielding 2 swords at the Tower of Joy--presumably one of the dudes who wasn't the Sword of the Morning? The dual-wield guy has a Targ dragon on his armor, and it doesn't look like Kingsguard armor.
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Mar 9, 2016 01:11
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Lycus posted:It's old Kingsguard armor. Robert had it redesigned, obviously It just seems awfully plain for Kingsguard, but maybe the show's budget is stretched too thin this season for anything fancier.
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Mar 9, 2016 01:28
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Krinkle posted:I just want to remind everyone of the time a person on his back patting not-a-blog told him they got uncontrollably gooey thinking about Sandor yelling at them and GRRM hurtfully asked if sam's fat pink mast aroused anything in the fairer sex and was met with resounding crickets. I would enjoy a link to this conversation.
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Mar 19, 2016 09:21
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I read a quote from GRRM praising Outlander and saying how unhappy he was that it didn't get an Emmy. I was confused about what he saw in it, because I tried to watch the first two episodes when they came out, dismissed them as romance novel trash, and then didn't watch any more. After reading GRRMs high praise for the show, I went back and watched season 1, and I guess now I know what he sees in it. That is the loving rapiest show on TV. I swear to God, every episode has at least one attempted rape. And there's some fine, explicit torture scenes too. My mind is boggled that there have been so many complaints about GoT's comparatively few rape scenes, and nobody seems to bat am eye at Outlander.
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Apr 5, 2016 06:18
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ruddiger posted:First season of Outlander wasn't too bad, but holy hell did they double down on the rape quota in season 2. I'm not about to google "outlander rape scenes," but off the top of my head, I can count at least 7 times where rape is at least attempted in Season one. And that's if I only count the last episode as one, which hardly seems fair because it's almost an entire hour devoted to an extended rape/torture event. I haven't watched Season 2, but if they managed to significantly increase the rapes, I'm surprised there's time for anything else. But don't get me wrong, I'm not making any value judgments about rape scenes on TV, I'm just surprised that I heard such an outcry about every rape scene in GoT and never heard a peep about Outlander.
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Apr 5, 2016 19:23
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ruddiger posted:2nd season has a sadist British officer who whips the male protagonist so brutally, that he falls in love with him, captures him again, rapes him repeatedly and gets so into the protagonist's head that he starts to impress onto him, so even when the male protagonist finally escapes, he can't stop fantasizing about being back with his abuser. Oh, that's where our accounts of amounts of rape in season 1 vs season 2 differ. That's actually season 1 you're talking about. They did that thing where season 1 was split into two halves, but still considered to be Season 1.
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Apr 6, 2016 01:17
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Blade_of_tyshalle posted:Do none of you absolute fuckers hover over a link to see the url? I hovered, then clicked anyway, because my hope is that strong.
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Apr 12, 2016 06:36
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whatever7 posted:Nobody wants to watch any Dunk and Egg. But HBO can make a spinoff of GoT about Tyrion wondering around Westeros and the fantasy European continent. I'd love a Dunk & Egg series, but I doubt the average non-book-reader would be interested.
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Apr 16, 2016 01:17
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Shimrra Jamaane posted:Super Season 6 spoilers Did that dragon piss his suit?
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Apr 17, 2016 05:50
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Read this the first time as "twelve year old women auditioning for the part of Shae." I didn't even go "wait, what?" when I thought it said that, because it seemed plausible. Super Ninja Fish posted:To get ready for Season 6, I’ve been reading the Bad Threads. This is great. Haikus, poems, songs, gross hilarious stories, photoshops, banners, goons raging, creative ways of trolling Martin’s blog. It’s a goldmine. If you find the song that someone wrote to the tune of Baby Got Back, please repost it. It was hilarious, and I went looking for it about a year ago and couldn't find it again.
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Apr 22, 2016 23:37
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I really like the Bran stuff in the books, though less so in the show. Bran has so much potential to show us things that we won't see any other way. I guess it also helps that I really like Bloodraven in Dunk & Egg, and I'm excited to have more of him in ASOIAF. I'm hoping we get more backstory on him, but I'm not holding my breath there.
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Apr 28, 2016 23:05
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kcroy posted:I haven't seen the episode yet, but my mom emailed me at 3 am about how Tyrion's mother was raped by the mad king and he is a targaryen. Please loving tell me this was in the show last night. I'm having a super lovely month and your mom's theories are making me smile. Tell her never stop with the theories. And in a serious post, aside from everything else wrong with the theory, Jon can't be the "only" secret Targ, because Maester Aemon was our first secret Targ and they can't go back and change that. Bloodraven is another for-sure secret Targ, but I guess they could theoretically get around that by never going into anything relating to who he is/why he has powers/how he got there and just leave it at HE IS A TREE WIZARD.
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May 2, 2016 17:06
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TK-42-1 posted:Bloodraven isnt a secret targ tho? He's a targ bastard. Targ bastards are still Targs (in the ridiculous theory where Tyrion is a secret Targ, he would still just be a Targ bastard). In Dunk & Egg, Bloodraven isn't a secret Targ because everyone in the books knows he's a Targ, but in the current storyline, nobody has any clue that Tree Wizard is Bloodraven. Much like how Maester Aemon was clearly Aemon Targaryen, it's just that somehow people didn't know/forgot that Maester Aemon and Aemon Targaryen were one and same. Though Bloodraven pulled some secret Targ poo poo in Dunk & Egg too by going around in disguise. EDIT: I guess you're only talking about "so secret that the character themselves doesn't know it" vs my more liberal definition. It happens way too often in Martin's works that a big, shocking reveal is "You know that guy you were just talking to that you thought was a nobody? He's actually a Targaryen!" Mnemosyne fucked around with this message at 17:29 on May 2, 2016 |
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May 2, 2016 17:27
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kcroy posted:hrm, from : http://asoiaf.westeros.org/index.php?/topic/84292-lyannarobertjon-snow/&page=2 Aside from the above, there's really no reason for GRRM to continually bring discussion of Rhaegar back into the story if he's not significant to an ongoing storyline. Rhaegar is dead, his wife is dead, his children are dead...if Jon isn't his, then there was no reason to keep having characters reminisce and flash back to him. And all his poo poo about being obsessed with needing another child / the dragon must have three heads, etc isn't very relevant without Jon being his son.
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May 2, 2016 18:44
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A GLISTENING HODOR posted:Just had it pointed out that Melisandre is sitting under a bunch of blankets in the scene where Davos comes in. Mel is never cold, so that was a neat touch to show that she's lost faith. She's also pregnant in real life, and I don't know how pregnant she was at the time of filming, but so far they've made sure not to show her mid-section on the show (at least from the front). The blankets might have just be an "oh poo poo, how do we hide her pregnancy?" situation.
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May 4, 2016 05:49
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CaptainRightful posted:She announced her pregnancy about a month ago. As Cavelcade said, sometimes the people making this show do things for legitimate story reasons. I know she announced a month ago, but people generally don't announce until they're in the "safe zone" which is 4 months in. Maybe later if you're a celebrity and the pregnancy is going to be scrutinized. The prior episode where she was naked was very careful to only show from the bottom of the boobs up, and full-length in the back. Her boobs look bigger too, so it's possible she's early in her pregnancy in these two episodes.
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May 5, 2016 00:01
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esperterra posted:Yeah, people who don't understand Dany would be Jon's aunt amuse the poo poo out of me. It's stupid, but I can see that the confusion comes in because they're roughly the same age. Most people's think of their aunts and uncles at 20 - 40 years older than they are.
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May 7, 2016 18:47
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TommyGun85 posted:If any of you think the ToJ scene in the show is going to confirm Jon's parentage, you are going to be very disappointed. What would the point of showing the ToJ if you're not going to show Jon's parentage? Just because they thought people want to see Ned have a swordfight? It's not like show watchers even really know who Arthur Dayne is, so it's not for him.
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May 8, 2016 05:17
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Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:Bran is just about to penetrate meera as hodor when he has a vision showing that they are cousins. He doesn't stop. Well if he's warged into Hodor, it's all cool. Hodor isn't her cousin.
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May 8, 2016 05:58
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kcroy posted:I still think we will have a Ghost fucks Nymeria while both Jon/Arya are warged in scene in the book. 
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May 8, 2016 06:58
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Josuke Higashikata posted:It also makes me irrationally annoyed that Bran is rocking himself a neat and tidy haircut this year when he's chilling under a tree with only Meera, Hodor and Max von Sydow with next to nothing on his person. At least give him a long hair wig if he doesn't want to grow it out in real life. It's the easiest thing to make it look at least somewhat consistent. Everything with Bran's storyline is now "a wizard did it." Bloodraven has pretty tidy hair and beard for having been fused to a tree for what the show is calling "a thousand years," which I guess makes him pretty much not Bloodraven in the show anyway. Bran is no longer required to fuse with the weirwood, he just has to hold on to some tree roots to see whatever he wants. He's no longer limited to watching through the weirwoods; he can see anything that happened anywhere at any time, it seems. Why Bloodraven would end up fused to the tree is now a mystery, because it's not a necessary component of their remote viewing. JumpinJackFlash posted:Kinda sad we didn't get Arya warging into a cat It seems like they've all but written out warging in general. They've removed all instances of Arya doing it, I don't recall them showing that Jon might be able to do it, and Shaggydog is dead, so no chance for Rickon. Bran was doing it back in like, season 1, but I don't think he's done it since. They'll still probably shoe-horn it back in there for Bran later on, when it's convenient, but I think they're treating him as the only warg. Which means we also are probably never getting Nymeria and her wolf army.
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May 9, 2016 19:39
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But I guess that at least now we won't have people arguing the Howland Reed has been in hiding all these years because he got stuck inside Arthur Dayne's body.
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May 9, 2016 19:40
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Does Davos even know that Melissandre burned Shireen? He obviously knows she's not around, but he could have assumed that she died at some point after Stannis' battle.
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May 11, 2016 00:21
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Dangerllama posted:All the show talk and no one else is annoyed that Jon peaced out from Castle Black with nothing but a shirt and skinny jeans? Yeah, it was weird that he handed over that cloak like it was some sort of representation of the office of Lord Commander, but I'm pretty sure he arrived at the wall wearing it. Also, the synopsis for Ep 5 is "Tyrion seeks a strange ally. Bran learns a great deal. Brienne goes on a mission. Arya is given a chance to prove herself." So I guess we're not getting R+L=J for two more weeks.
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May 11, 2016 04:26
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jsoh posted:It mentions there are wild weirwoods too but presumably they need a face for the old gods to act through them I don't think they need faces for someone to see through them. I think the faces were carved later as a bit of a warning or reminder "hey, if you're near this tree, someone is watching you." I'd have to go back and look, but I don't think the children of the forest carved the faces, it was men, wasn't it? Which means that the faces aren't really necessary.
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May 11, 2016 20:21
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| # ¿ May 16, 2024 12:16 |
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Jorah can't disappear until he licks some honey out of Daenerys' hair. Or whatever it is that song was trying to imply.
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May 24, 2016 19:41
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