I hate children.

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > I hate children.

Uncle Salty: Jan 19, 2008; BOYS

I would like to quote and agree with this:

digitalscribbles posted:

I just want to say one more time...it is OKAY to feel the way you do. There is nothing wrong with you. Simply because we can reproduce, doesn't mean it is right for everyone. I say...accept who you are and how you feel about kids right now, but be open to the fact that someday when you are 35 you may change your mind.

And I want to tell you that I, too, kept waiting throughout my twenties and early thirties for that urge to reproduce to kick in. I honestly figured that it would either hit me in the face one morning upon waking, or be a slow realization, but I was certain it would come. I guess I sort of wanted to want it, in a way. I didn't want to be the cat lady.

It didn't come. I still don't like kids or want to be a parent. I love my own parents, and I love my gaggle of nieces and nephews. I am happy with my decision or character or choices or whatever you want to call it.

I have my own family; I just won't ever have kids.

# ¿ Jul 29, 2011 11:47

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# ¿ Apr 24, 2024 22:33

Uncle Salty: Jan 19, 2008; BOYS

Oh, I could get plenty crazy with respect to my dog.

# ¿ Aug 1, 2011 02:23

Uncle Salty: Jan 19, 2008; BOYS

OppositeOfLove posted:

I wasn't a fan, myself ... that is until a boiled chicken dropped out of my wife and proceeded to turn everything about my life on its head.

My own experience was that I disliked children because I was afraid of being a parent. I was afraid of being a parent because my parents were such tremendous dickholes that I thought I'd never be able to rise above it. 5 Years and Minus Two Abusive Parents Later - Life is pretty good. That kid is awesome and he makes me feel good because he's around.

Just remember - if you hate kids ... well ... you were a kid once, yourself. Unless you popped out of the 'gina independently wealthy, speaking three languages and changing your own butt - someone had to raise you. Sneering at that process makes you sound like a tremendous douchebag.

Yes, he makes you feel good! What a worthwhile service he provides you! Everyone should have lots of babies because they make you FEEL good about YOURSELF!
:saddowns:

(THIS IS EXAGGERATED TO MAKE A POINT ABOUT HOW PARENTS SOMETIMES COME ACROSS)

# ¿ Oct 6, 2011 21:42

Uncle Salty: Jan 19, 2008; BOYS

Fair enough! And in addition to SMUG ENTITLED MAN CHILDREN I think we should also include SHALLOW SELF CENTERED FRIGID BITCHES.
Although this conversation comes up over and over again, I enjoy it every time.

# ¿ Oct 6, 2011 22:17

Uncle Salty: Jan 19, 2008; BOYS

Whoa, Opposite of Love, you sure are getting tough on me!

Parents saying how good their kids make them feel can very easily come across as valuing the kids for their own vanities' sake. While I'm glad that your role as a parent makes you feel good, that's not really what kids are for (I think?).

That said, I am glad you're happy! But I'm sorry you're so anxiety-ridden and defensive(based on your posting).

# ¿ Oct 7, 2011 17:19

Uncle Salty: Jan 19, 2008; BOYS

I actually was coming back here to point out that there a lot of things about modern U.S. life which are pretty punishing to parents: healthcare, paternity/maternity leave, the general attitude that people should be at their jobs' disposal 24/7 via handy electronic device, the high cost and failing infrastructures of education at all levels.

I also would say that these systems are more punitive for U.S. women than for men (but I could just be saying that because I am a woman... that feeling probably has much to do with the facts of biology rather than some inveterate unfairness in the system).

# ¿ Oct 7, 2011 18:24

Uncle Salty: Jan 19, 2008; BOYS

OK, we get it- you're like, not just a Jesus for Parents, you're the beacon and shelter for all oppressed people. I hope that Something Awful is ready for the truth you are going to rain down upon us! Bring in the dancing horses! Bring in the new messiah.

Your points aren't horrible, but your method sucks! And that's not something that I can take 'laying down' as you put it.

Edit: Wait! I remember you! Opposite, you're the baby on the airplane fight guy. That thread was a trainwreck; and of course, everyone ended up looking idiotic in that version of this slapfight.

# ¿ Oct 7, 2011 20:39

Uncle Salty: Jan 19, 2008; BOYS

Ah, fair enough, my apologies for offending you.

But I agree with what Poop Deli posted there.

# ¿ Oct 7, 2011 20:57

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# ¿ Apr 24, 2024 22:33

Uncle Salty: Jan 19, 2008; BOYS

I guess I don't have hard evidence for it- can you point me to some? I wouldn't know where to begin, except for poverty levels broken down by gender. (That might be a new thread entirely.)

# ¿ Oct 7, 2011 21:40

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > I hate children.