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Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

MrBling posted:

Wow, JR is really going nuts on twitter.

For those not watching...

quote:

4 the record, play by play in WWE's dead. Funkhauser,the GM, enforces 'story telling' on Raw. Holds don't exist. WWE board needs counseling.

quote:

If Laurinaitis & his corporate cronies feel Cole is the 'voice of Raw' then they are more out of touch than I thought. Fans want wrestling.

quote:

Funhauser/ Raw GM is avaialble for speaking engagement for schools for the hearing impaired. Contact @CMPunk 4 more info. This is too easy.

quote:

When announcers speak of something. TOTALLY unrelated 2 what viewers are seeing on TV screen it's disconnect. Does GM&cronies not get that?

quote:

The naive fan thinks some announcers can solve perceived WWE broadcast issues. News flash...THEY CAN'T. Announcers being 'Funkhausered'.

quote:

Note to Laurinaitis & peer hungry cronies: over mgmt of all broadcasters akin to putting a bit in a horse's mouth. It's all about control.

quote:

Funkhauser, hello. Doing English speaking, in ring promos to Spanish speaking audience=no reaction. Duh. Oh, wait my bad, WWE's 'global.'

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Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

He does most of his tweeting from an iPad, too. The mental image of him angry-typing into the on-screen iPad keyboard just makes me laugh.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

Lone Rogue posted:

But let's say, hypothetically, that you enjoyed it. Therefore, it was hypothetically a good blowjob.

Reminds me of one of my favorite off-color jokes.

:v: I ever tell you about the worst blowjob I ever had?
:confused: ... no?
:v: It was fuckin' great!

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

Lone Rogue posted:

I don't know whether that means Nash could call more or just text.

I would presume that it means when Nash actually calls, instead of them just trading texts or emails, it means something serious just happened.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

Glitterbomber posted:

Christ Foley how long have you been a wrestler? How do you act like a big baby over a sorta kinda bad review after so long in the business?

If there's one thing that Foley has never been good at, it's taking criticism. The Hardcore Diaries and Countdown to Lockdown are basically him screaming, "I'M RELEVANT! STILL RELEVANT! LOOK AT ME, I'M RELEVANT! I CAN GIVE YOU STARS! *hits self with frying pan* LOOK! LOOOOOOOK!"

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

Yeah, to Cena's credit, he isn't abusing that amount of influence he has over Vince, although I'd say part of that is due to him being the ultimate company soldier -- he has his own opinions, and he'll do little stuff here and there, but his mindset seems to be, "If the boss says do it, then I do it."

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

Gonzo McFee posted:

JR takes a brief vacation from being the bigger man.

If WWE hadn't stepped up to take over fulfillment of his BBQ business, I can't imagine he'd have any involvement with them right now -- it just feels like a marriage of convenience, since they handle both domestic and international shipping and they have far more money to advertise the stuff than he ever would.

JR's always been a target for mocking and the like from Vince and Co., but they've been using him as little more than a punching bag for the last year or so. It's well past the stage of ridiculousness now.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

Lone Rogue posted:

Tweetdeck broke for me :(

Odd.

Though speaking of TweetDeck, I am not at all a fan of TweetDeck's new desktop application -- the whole reason I use it is to get pop-up notifications of new tweets on my desktop, and the HTML5 rewrite of the desktop application removed that. Thanks, Twitter, not only does your new Web interface suck, but you ruined TweetDeck after buying it. Assholes. :argh:

(At least the older TweetDeck application hasn't had its API privileges revoked, like they did with the older Android Twitter app.)

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

coconono posted:

In all the years of taking stunners, why has no one ever spit the beer in Austin's face as a defence?

Because everyone knows the Barley & Hops Mist will make Austin more powerful than anyone can possibly imagine.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

FishBulb posted:

Are you people seriously having a "which pro wrestling personality could beat up the other one for realsies?" argument...

In the Twitter thread, no less.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

Gonzo McFee posted:

Is MD 20/20 a different drink in America than the UK cos if not drat Dusty, you're a jakey bastard.

Well, it isn't sold at 20% ABV anymore in the States, but it's still sold as a fortified beverage sort of thing. Pretty foul, too -- but Dusty's from the backwoods of Georgia. Don't forget that.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

DannoMack posted:

Is Regal ever going to get a retirement push or did he blow it with his last positive test when he was GM?

He's almost 44 and, outside of his epic GM run, has never been particularly over with the crowd. I'd say that ship has sailed.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

savinhill posted:

I'm just surprised he hasn't trashed Flair at all when he's talking about TNA people he don't like.

Steiner doesn't like Flair, yeah, but he was there for all the poo poo Hogan and BischoffBitchoff did in WCW, so seeing it all happen again in TNA has pretty clearly caused him to snap.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

TomWaitsForNoMan posted:



Thank God I wasn't the only one.

This is just a saga now...

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

njsykora posted:

The ex-writer behind the account is going to be on a Figure Four Daily next week, that should be a great interview.

Not necessarily -- we always hear reports about the creative team being constantly frustrated by Vince's mercurial personality, and then guys like DeJoseph and Lagana go on the record and we find out that their ideas were just as terrible, because WWE tends to hire failed sitcom writers.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

njsykora posted:

In fairness, to a man with Punk's music tastes that concert sounds pretty much like getting all your sexual desires satisfied in the same night.

Not to mention that Sioux City is a horrible shithole in the middle of loving nowhere. I'd hate to have to miss out on stuff because I had to head out there, too.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

coconono posted:

and Slayer is freaking awesome live.

Not my kind of music at all, so I'll take your word for it.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

PunkBoy posted:

I'm not sure whether the best part is that she's wearing sneakers or the BBQ chips laid out on her dress.

The shoes that go with wedding dresses are pretty loving uncomfortable (hell, the dresses themselves are pretty uncomfortable, if my wife and some other friends are to be believed) -- I know that on our wedding day, my wife was wearing sandals except for when pictures were being taken, and during the wedding itself.

:sigh:

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

Happy Happyist posted:

This boggles my mind to no end. They got Michael Cole for his legit broadcasting experience, but he rarely ever sounds like he's doing anything but reading news copy.

That's because Cole's broadcasting background is in news (he started as a CBS Radio correspondent, and I believe he then spent time working for CNN prior to joining the WWF). He had no sports experience before he started in wrestling.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

... wouldn't that be "wretched?"

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

Jelq Swagger posted:

It's ratchet. A ton of rappers say it and every teen says it. Trust me on this one

edit: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=ratchet AW is pretty childish

:stare:

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

I'm in the hospital with a 103 fever and a bunch of IVs plugged into me. Don't read Twitter in that condition. It's ... weird.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

Lone Rogue posted:

Dog opens one of the gifts. It's Raven. Raven adds the dog to his new Nest/Flock.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

bobkatt013 posted:

Here a great one from Bitchoff

Anyone care to remind him that the President is the commander-in-chief of this country's armed forces?

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

DannoMack posted:

Maybe it's an Owen DVD?

Martha Hart still has a pending lawsuit against WWE regarding non-payment of royalties for the use of his likeness (and she's also arguing that they don't have the right to use his legal name for promotional purposes), there's no way we're seeing an Owen DVD anytime soon.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

incredible bear posted:

So what happens when Owen turns up on other DVDs? Is that the non-payment in question.

Seems weird that Owen wouldn't have got anything from featuring so heavily in the Bret DVD.

Martha claims that WWE hasn't been paying royalties for several years for any usage of Owen's likeness. A large chunk of her lawsuit was thrown out back in April, but the judge ruled that there were sufficient grounds to proceed on the claims about non-payment and whether or not WWE has any rights to use his likeness / legal name.

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

JR's Twitter posted:

Headed to @okcthunder game..DVR'ing #WWE #RAW. Black hat in tow. Court side seats near center court. Farting thru silk. :) #sauceit

:stare:

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

Karmine posted:

I think he's saying that the idea of such primo seats going to him is like taking an elegant fabric like silk and farting through it? At least, poo poo, I hope that's what he means. It sounds like a JRism.

Or he's wearing silk underwear. :stare:

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

Karmine posted:



Don't want to get my hopes up but this is encouraging.

Day at a time, Jake. DAY AT A TIME. :ohdear:

Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

Sionistic posted:

I wanna see the whole WWE roster playing laser tag
Bryan would claim he cant lose because hes AGILE
Titus would bark for signals
Kane would melt people's gun and ruin the game :(
Cena would ignore people shooting him
Punk would claim he has the best high score while Heyman would shine the gun
AJ would be impossible to beat because small target and skipping is efficient
Miz would die first because hes huge and cant shut up
Dolph would sell a laser tag
Henry and Show would have to carry their armor in their hands, but no one would shoot them
Sandow would mock the others for not using optimal routes and not realizing that it is very hard to hit a person who is cartwheeling
Sheamus would be eliminated laughing while going down in a blaze of glory
Cesaro would want two guns
The shield would be pricks blocking a hall
Ryback would bring his lunch

What the gently caress is this?

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Timby
Dec 23, 2006

Your mother!

Realtalk, that tweet is actually troubling. Obviously there isn't an exact science or anything about it, but counselors generally recommend that recovering addicts have at least a year of sobriety under their belts before they start looking at getting into relationships; when you're a long-term user like Jake is, your brain is so hosed from that abuse, and it takes a long time, upwards of a year, before your reward system (dopamine) and your happiness system (serotonin) start to get back to normal. Relationships are something else entirely, and they can introduce a poo poo-ton of stress.

Jake's going to fight a daily battle as he moves forward ... I hope he can take things slowly. :unsmith:

Timby fucked around with this message at 02:50 on May 1, 2013

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