GWS General Chat: Damn I feel like a boss when I have one in each hand.

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Goons with Spoons > GWS General Chat: Damn I feel like a boss when I have one in each hand.

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pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Ah mussels. So delicious and good until you hit that one bad mussel.

Then you glimpse the pits of hell as you wrap yourself around the porcelain portal of despair. But will we stop eating mussels because of that threat? Hell no.

# ¿ Mar 14, 2012 15:10

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# ¿ Apr 19, 2024 03:52

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Halalelujah posted:

I'm want to start a "high" seafood trend among paleo eaters where they stick shellfish in a bag for weeks on end so they can suck the putrefied goo from the leg of a king crab and then die.

Rumor has it that models prepare for big shows by buying a bunch of cocktail shrimp, leaving it out for a while, then gorge on the rotting shrimp so they can get food poisoning and trim down by the inevitable consequences.

I stress that this is rumor, and I have not heard it from an actual model, as I am a horrible, horny, forever alone goon.

# ¿ Mar 14, 2012 16:37

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Halalelujah posted:

Whenever I want to lose weight I just put some mayonnaise out in the sun for a few hours and mix it with some kashi.

Bowel lacerating diarrhea, sounds like fun times.

...Actually, we should market that as the next upscale diet trend. 'Clean your colon AND lose weight!'

# ¿ Mar 14, 2012 17:02

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Wroughtirony posted:

If you're a dude.

What, you don't like a hard fleshy appendage going back and forth between buxom bosoms that looks remarkably like a flesh colored turd being pushed out then sucked back in?

# ¿ Mar 14, 2012 18:07

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Dane posted:

Someone here has problems, either ocular or otherwise.

I have a poo-centric mind.

# ¿ Mar 14, 2012 18:29

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

bunnielab posted:

When thrusting away at a lady's tits it is assumed you will be reaching back and fingering her at the same time.

Ohhhh....I see where the skidmark remark comes from now...

# ¿ Mar 15, 2012 17:20

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Darval posted:

I really did not know women can get nipple hair.

I made a girl cry in college because of this.

I'm a horrible person.

# ¿ Mar 15, 2012 19:00

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Happy Hat posted:

It's confusing, that's all..

Kind of like using "x is different than y" - shouldn't it be "x is different from y" instead? Or is it ok to use than when you compare two? I could understand it if it was in the form of comparing a difference from a subject between two other subjects, but then I guess it should still be from?

And affect and effect is interchangable too...

Also - pronounciation of certain words doesn't make sense either!

Kinda like.. beer...

Beard is pronounced as beer with a d.
Bared is pronounced as bear with a d.

poo poo man, I moved around so much as a kid I never got a proper education into all this weird, technical English poo poo. I just read so much I've been able to fake it by feel.

I mean, what the gently caress is a split infinitive, anyway? Or a dangling participle? And plus, I seem to have done just fine without knowing.

Although there was an embarrassing moment in fifth grade when I was reading aloud in class and pronounced 'chaos' as 'chao-os', because my Korean parents didn't exactly speak English at home and I never heard the word aloud before. I mean, I knew what the word meant because I read a lot, but man, did I feel ashamed.

# ¿ Mar 16, 2012 20:03

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Halalelujah posted:

English is the shattered brandy-glass in the roaring fireplace of language.

The only real answer to all "WTF English" questions.

# ¿ Mar 16, 2012 20:54

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

i shoot friendlies posted:

You cannot keep it. That is profiting from misfortune. Found money has to be used charitably, it cannot be kept. If you keep it, it becomes wallet poison, spoiling any money it contacts. If you use it charitably, it goes out and finds other money that has nothing to do, and sends it back to you wallet.

-The Rules according to i shoot friendlies, Volume XXIV, Section VII, Paragraph III.

Charitable use of found money = buy your friends shots.

# ¿ Mar 18, 2012 15:07

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

I wanted to join the boy scouts once. Went to some meetings to see what it was like; all they did was sit in a church meeting room and eat fig newtons and drink ice tea. Also, the scout leader was this creepy looking dude who read out of this boy scout manual and mumbled a lot.

My mom was on a 'no quitting' policy so she demanded I keep with it after I told her my initial impressions. Then she learned that I'd have to get a uniform and that we'd have to pay for it, so after a quick price check on those things, I was given full license to never attend one of those meetings again.

# ¿ Mar 19, 2012 17:15

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Why? Why must my boss spend the last 5 hours on the phone with Dell tech support when I TOLD HIM that all but one of his usb ports were busted, and that it was NOT a software problem? He just got off the phone and said he needs a usb hub so he can split that one good port...something I TOLD HIM 5 hours ago. Like...goddamn dude, next time don't even bother asking me what's up if you're gonna go ignore that advice.

# ¿ Mar 20, 2012 21:38

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Charmmi posted:

I signed up for the chili cookoff at work. I will not let you down, GWS.

Except there's a small part of me that wants to bring a crockpot of Hormel Chili...

Psh, everyone knows the real deal is Stagg chili with cubes of Velveeta.

# ¿ Mar 22, 2012 16:04

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Mmm, pickled eggs are always good. My ma makes a really nice Korean version where she boils sticks of flank steak and sliced garlic cloves in soy sauce and sugar, then sticks in peeled, boiled eggs after it cooled a bit. Then the whole mess goes into the fridge to sit for a week or so. Nice side dish that can serve as a whole meal with just a bowl of rice. My sister and I used to fight over the slices of egg.

# ¿ Mar 23, 2012 20:19

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Wroughtirony posted:

See also: Motarded, Motard. Portmanteau of "motivated" and "retarded"

It is also worth noting that between American military branches, coordinated group grunting is surprisingly sophisticated. The difference between "Hooah!" and "Oorah!" while phonetically minor, is actually very significant, to the point where using the wrong one is a serious social gaffe, akin to wearing a read shirt to a Crips party.

:themoreyouknow:

Indeed, them Crips really hate reading. :xd:

# ¿ Mar 29, 2012 16:03

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Phummus posted:

Fantastic:
http://bites.today.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/03/29/10924885-marilyn-hagerty-in-talks-with-anthony-bourdain-for-book-deal

Oh man. I wonder if, deep down inside, she's a little bit bitter that it was an Olive Garden review late in her life that went viral and caused all these opportunities to happen.

# ¿ Mar 30, 2012 20:04

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Phummus posted:

My wife took me out for my annual sushi dinner last night for my birthday. Fantastic stuff. I had a couple of questions that the folks at the restaurant couldn't really answer for me though. So of course I turn to internet strangers.

My kids got a grilled chicken and vegetable dish. It was garnished with chips of some thinly sliced, deep fried vegetable that I couldn't identify. Circular in shape with symmetrical holes in it. They looked like 1-2" diameter lace doilies.

They comped me an ice cream dessert, and it was delicious, but the ice cream was wrapped in a gelatinous shell. I've never encountered it before. It was sticky and chewy and delicious. Anyone know what I'm talking about here?

Lotus root and mochi ice cream.

# ¿ Apr 4, 2012 13:48

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Phummus posted:

drat, that was fast. Thanks!

It's only because I hate lotus root (and water chestnuts) with an undying passion. Just something about the texture makes me feel like I'm chewing styrofoam.

# ¿ Apr 4, 2012 13:58

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

The Macaroni posted:

Really? When I've had lotus root, it's just like a potato: either a super crisp potato chip or a nice stewed potato.

My ma's favorite way of making lotus root was to lightly saute with soy sauce sweetened with malt syrup. She liked the crunch; I detested it. If I had it fried or stewed, I probably wouldn't hate it as much now.

# ¿ Apr 4, 2012 14:16

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Phummus posted:

Why do you have to go and ruin all my fun things!?!?!

They're screwing with you, man. Everyone knows British people do the ultimate troll on the world on April Fools, because they have a tradition of not fooling people on April 1, but making it seem like it's a trick, so everyone gets confused.

Fear not, unicorn recipes are real! Really, really real!

Oh, and would you be interested in buying a bridge? I got some sweet deals, man.

EDIT: In all honesty, I feel ya. I don't like April Fools because I am fairly easy to fool over the internet; I remember falling hard for a slashdot April Fools joke that involved the 'discovery' of a new color that you couldn't see because, duh, your monitor can't display a color it doesn't know.

# ¿ Apr 4, 2012 16:59

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

KozmoNaut posted:

Having watched the movie, I can only agree.

I liked the first book; I don't want to watch the movie since I have such a vivid idea in my mind of how things should look. Katniss, for example, looks just wrong to me. (Of course, the actress is drat hot, but still, not what I had in mind at all.)

I couldn't get past the first few chapters of the second book. I heard the third book was even worse.

And if I lived in France, I wouldn't eat toast either. I'd eat butter and baguettes and croissants every day, and die of diabetes and a heart attack all at once.

# ¿ Apr 6, 2012 15:40

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

mediaphage posted:

You forgot chocolate. It's a thing to butter up baguettes and dip them in chocolates of various drinkability.

How could I forget? I remember the first time I saw someone have a baguette and chocolate; it was one of Jacques Pepin's shows, and I immediately went out and bought a good baguette and a bar of nice bittersweet chocolate. I was in heaven for the next twenty minutes.

# ¿ Apr 6, 2012 16:10

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

gently caress this profession. Evidently, my name is not 'Murican enough for the legal profession. So he wants me to think about changing my name.

God I hate this job.

# ¿ Apr 9, 2012 18:10

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Fun video of a dude working in a bakery.

Nothing crazy or shocking, just commercial bread making set to a tune, baked by a guy who likes his job.

# ¿ Apr 9, 2012 22:04

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Experto Crede posted:

A few days ago I spilt a pan of boiling water, just off the hob, onto my bare foot and now have some pretty bitching first degree burn blisters on my big toe.

Out of curiosity, what's your worst kitchen related injury?

Not that I'm not interested in your, or anyone else's, injury, but we have a thread for that.

# ¿ Apr 12, 2012 18:37

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Reading about this throwdown in the morning; I now have West Side Story music stuck in my head.

# ¿ Apr 17, 2012 15:47

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

The Macaroni posted:

From a DC lunch truck today: fontina/parmesan mac & cheese with slow-roasted pork, broccoli rabe, and olive oil toasted breadcrumbs on top. Good lunch.

Ugggg, I hate you. I think I'd rather go hungry than hit up the bad deli next door. NJ, why no awesome food trucks?

# ¿ Apr 18, 2012 17:57

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Ahahaha, I love your updates on corporate life, HH.

Stick it to the (wo)man!

# ¿ Apr 18, 2012 18:04

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Vlex posted:

This thing has no bearing on reality.

*quotes a bunch of statistics and literally does the math for us*

I am very confused by what you're saying. Who are you talking about anyway? I shoot friendlies? The guy who showed you exactly why the statement "Every 30 seconds in the US a woman is raped in the workplace." is ridiculous?

# ¿ Apr 18, 2012 20:14

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

So, a confirmed case of mad cow in Cali. The first thing I thought was, "YES! Cheap beef!" That was also the second, third, and all subsequent thoughts as well.

# ¿ Apr 24, 2012 21:28

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Walk Away posted:

Where, exactly?

The news outlets are reporting that the USDA did not specify the location or the facility name other than to say it was discovered at a rendering plant in "central California". Also, it was a dairy cow. No further details at this point.

EDIT: Also, they state that it was an atypical case as it occurred spontaneously, and it was not due to the cattle feed.

pnumoman fucked around with this message at 21:49 on Apr 24, 2012

# ¿ Apr 24, 2012 21:46

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Shiiiit; here's hoping for the best, Phummus.

# ¿ May 1, 2012 16:05

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Sorry about the bad news, Phummus. Hopefully things will turn out well in the end.

# ¿ May 1, 2012 19:21

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Mr. Wiggles posted:

If you want to shop at large warehouse stores that ruin the environment with their unnecessarily long supply chains, that destroy local businesses by forcing them into economies of scale in which they cannot compete, that completely wreck local cultures and neighborliness by enforcing a bland similarity and corporate culture on communities, that extinguish the unique and wonderful local and regional products and preferences in the name of conveniently marketable homogenization, and that on top of all that treat you like a thief and criminal every time you shop at their store, then fine, go for it. You probably vote republican, too.

My overpriced, hippie, New England Liberal Arts education loves you, Mr. Wiggles. :allears:

# ¿ May 7, 2012 02:39

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

NosmoKing posted:

Yeah, it seems that whole eugenics and genocide thing kind of has fallen out of favor.

Which is why we should just institute a blind lottery to decide who gets culled. Everybody wins! (except for those who die)

# ¿ May 8, 2012 16:15

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Mr. Wiggles posted:

Have any of you rented a car in Israel before?

No, but I definitely applaud whoever got you that custom av and title.

# ¿ May 8, 2012 17:52

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Halalelujah posted:

Girl I just stopped seeing after a cataclysmic night just posted her new tattoo on Facebook.

It is of a skeleton dancing on a dead man.

Wheeeeee

Seems like she's taking it well.

# ¿ May 11, 2012 23:26

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Walk Away posted:

We went to lunch for an early Mother's Day. My mom and her mother-in law got each other gifts. I got them cards and some chocolates, too. Neither of them even told me happy Mother's Day, let alone give me a stupid card or anything. Now I'm kinda bummed.

Aww, no mother should be left out on Mother's Day. Happy (early) Mother's Day, Walk Away.

# ¿ May 13, 2012 00:52

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

How DARE wiggles imply that I sweat from my rear end. My perfect Asian hairless body does NOT sweat from anywhere below the armpits, sir. I wash my jeans never, because I have a holy Asian aura of dirt and smell repulsion.

# ¿ May 18, 2012 17:15

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# ¿ Apr 19, 2024 03:52

pnumoman: Sep 26, 2008; I never get the last word, and it makes me very sad.

Scientastic posted:

Your lifestyle can be unique or not, it cannot be somewhat unique. Unique is an absolute.

I am quasi-unique. Or semi-unique. But I am not somewhat unique.

# ¿ May 18, 2012 18:41

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Goons with Spoons > GWS General Chat: Damn I feel like a boss when I have one in each hand.

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