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CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Can't post for 8 years!

Communist Walrus posted:

The Six Day War comes to mind, if you're including modern wars. Though apparently initial Israeli estimates were that they'd have the war won in 3-4 days, so it actually took twice as long as envisioned.

The Ten-Day War worked out pretty tidily for Slovenia.

Subsequent conflicts in the rest of Yugoslavia...less so...

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CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Alhazred posted:

I honestly wonder I anyone actually considered this.

I assume whoever did ended up as a moist patch of ground.

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/world/watch-rhino-attacks-zookeeper-s-car-germany-no-one-was-n1047221

Per wikipedia:

"It is unsubstantiated that rhinoceros were used for war functions. By analyzing Albrecht Dürer's famous 1515 woodcut, it is possible that the liberties taken with the rhino's design[clarification needed] were in fact designs for a suit of armour created for the rhinoceros's fight in Portugal.[10] However, rhinos' apparently 'thick' or 'plated' skin is actually very sensitive and the animals have poor eyesight, heavily limiting their ability to run in a specific direction. Their overly aggressive nature would make them unsuitable for use in mounted combat."

Edit: This also led me to the entertaining story of Clara the Rhino - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clara_(rhinoceros)

CleverHans fucked around with this message at 03:41 on Sep 1, 2019

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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SlothfulCobra posted:

It's kinda funny in Vinland Saga when Canute is talking about how he's going to try making a paradise when you know what's going to happen in 50 years come 1066.


To put things in perspective, that's how the guillotine was initially a weirdly egalitarian invention, since it made beheading available to offenders of every class as opposed to the former series of differing execution methods.

I've heard of plenty brutal execution methods outside of Europe, the ones that stick out the most to me are the Mongols having trampled people to death, locked them in a small box to die, or that one guy that they poured silver into his ears. The Persians also had their own horrible methods. It's not about deterrence, it's just inducing suffering as retribution and some kind of twisted entertainment.


Not just egalitarian, the guillotine was regarded as a quantum leap in humane execution technology. Previously, people had the very real probability of slowly strangling to death at the end of the rope rather than a quick snapping of the spinal cord and numerous beheadings were hideously botched, requiring multiple ax/sword swings.

Come to think of it, it is probably a significantly more humane method than the U.S.'s current "hey, we just scrounged up this cocktail of bootleg execution drugs" system.

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Morholt posted:

Why is Babylon thought of as a big deal? From what I've read it was an above average kingdom under Hammurabi and then got owned repeatedly by Elamites, Hittites and Assyrians for a millennium. Why is Babylon more "well-known"? Is it the bible? Proximity to Baghdad?

I feel like the discovery of the Code of Hammurabi has to feature largely in this in modern times. That plus all the existing clout from loving up Solomon's Temple in the bible and Hellenic hype for the Hanging Gardens maybe?

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Arglebargle III posted:



I feel like this concerned Apollo has some meme potential.

When a Gorgon is like "Yo, check this out"

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Angry Lobster posted:

Question for historians: A friend of mine has spent a couple years in a North African country doing independent research as part of his doctorate studies. The government aproached him and asked for permission to publish a small part of his work, for tourism guides, websites, small magazines and such, nothing too serious. The thing is that when they did the translation certain parts were changed without his knowledge to give the text a nationalistic slant and he just found out and he's pissed. Probably gonna let it slide, but what can be done in this kind of situations?

If he ever wants to return to said country and not get jerked around in immigration / worked over by the govt. there, probably nothing.

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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skasion posted:

Not very ancient but lol



(from A View of Devonshire in MDCXXX: With a Pedigree of Most of Its Gentry, by Thomas Westcote, Gent.)

I'll have you know, I'm descended from a long line of Suckbitchs.

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Ola posted:

Speaking of owning old things, does anyone have any reproduction pottery in daily use? I wouldn't mind owning some Samian ware or orange/black figure, but they don't go very well with our interior. Particularly the Greek buggery...

Sounds like you need to redecorate.

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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DACK FAYDEN posted:

While this is true, you forgot "the number zero", meaning we don't have to go any further than first grade to prove that tweet is idiocy produced by a blithering moron. Zero hadn't even spread to Arabic in 800 (it took another decade according to Wikipedia), let alone the other side of the continent.

Eh, zero is overrated.

I'd say it actually has very little value.

Approaching nothing, even.

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Epicurius posted:

Fun fact a lot of people don't know. Montezuma's descendants are still Spanish nobility today. The Duke of Moctezuma de Tultengo just got into a public argument with the President of Mexico last year after AMLO wrote a letter to Spain and the Vatican demanding they apologize for the Spanish conquest of Mexico.

Accurate, because this just blew my mind.

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Nessus posted:

And Roma spelled backwards is -- By Hercules!

When you're stabbed in the chest
By the friend you loved best
That's amor(ae)

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Relatedly, how did Romans get anything done in the evening with their candles shooting exploding balls of fire everywhere?
Seems unnecessarily chaotic.

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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sullat posted:

A few minutes searching comes up with this. My Spanish is pretty bad after a few decades of not using it, so I probably won't look for naughty bits in it to determine if it's appropriate for fin de siecle lady factory workers.

NSFFDSLFW

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Grevling posted:

I've been interested in how people historically have made fabric so I've collected some nettles and want to try making thread out of them. I've taken the leaves off the stalks and now I'm soaking them in water, this part is called retting. I had to bend them to fit them in the tub though, I may have already hosed up.

I went down a rabbit hole of youtube "historical linen making" videos awhile back.

I remember being struck by how accurate the term "flaxen haired" is. I always just kinda assumed it meant "kinda straw colored" and was mostly poetic license.

No. Flax fibers as they are being scutched/heckled/spun look exactly like a fistful of long, light blond hair. I also learned where "towheaded" comes from.

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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ChubbyChecker posted:

I've seen similar type of protections by other cultures too. My guess is that it's to protect the neck and at the same time keep the neck mobile. This is difficult to achieve without mail or late medieval harnesses.

Correct, the importance of this is attested to by many early clan writings. Most notably, perhaps, the Wu Tang.

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Klyith posted:

For all of them you have the issue that determining succession by who can survive the plots and conspiracy to become the big cheese means you tend to get paranoids in charge of your nation.

Never before has weirdo joke "It's not paranoia if they're really after you" been so applicable.

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Elissimpark posted:

Well, that's something new I've learnt today. I'm starting to understand the appeal of capital punishment for a central authority now, especially if someone had differing views on the value of revenge.

I'd say that it was a much more equitable solution, but, even then, it greatly differed by social class, with the poor swinging at the end of a rope and those of rank treated to a swift beheading (assuming they were lucky enough to get a competent and sober ax/swordsman).

Hence the populist appeal of the guillotine: instantaneous, ostensibly painless ends for all!

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Slim Jim Pickens posted:

They didn't know how to smelt iron so it was just astonishingly rare. But gold was still valuable, because it was baller.

Ya, my understanding is that the list of all the places they got iron from is as follows:

A. iron meteorites they found in the desert

- end of list -

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Ola posted:

I've heard speculation that Chinese dragon legends have their origin in dinosaur bones, which are really easy to find in some areas.

This is one of those theories that, though probably impossible to definitively prove, is so convincing I feel like it has to be right.

Like, imagine you are a practical, non-gullible stone age person who stumbles upon a plesiosaur skeleton on the top of a mountain.

:science: "Well, actually, those wings are really flippers because this is millions of years old when everything around here was underwater and also these things basically turned into chickens."

:what:"Yeah right buddy, I know a dragon when I see one."

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Telsa Cola posted:

It reaally only needs to happen a few times and that poo poo does generally pop up sometimes in drainages and canyons so it's not insanely uncommon. We had a fairly recent discovery of a new dinosaur because someone noticed the bones on a beach.

Ya, and I imagine "here is indisputable physical proof of a giant loving monster" does not get forgotten easily in any culture, as you could never be 100% sure with contemporary technology that they weren't still out there.

CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Just wait till everybody a thousand years from now finds all of our ritual or religious Funko Pops.

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CleverHans
Apr 25, 2011
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Grand Fromage posted:

Yeah, it's easy to think that of course if you were in battle you'd want to be covered in armor, but there certainly seem to be plenty of situations where it's not helpful. Or, at least, being more mobile is more helpful. Medieval plate was very technologically advanced, it wasn't easy to make armor that protected you that well and also didn't restrict your mobility.

In addition, most people in medieval times who were wearing full plate mail had the advantage of getting carted around on the back of a horse, not having to schlep around on foot wearing an additional 30-60 lbs of steel.

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