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dreadmojo
Oct 23, 2010



Legit Cyberpunk

SurreptitiousMuffin posted:

If I ever win, I promise to write all my judge commentaries in blank verse (or haiku, if appropriate).

Huh.

SO LET IT BE WRITTEN

SO LET IT BE DONE

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JimsonTheBetrayer
Oct 13, 2010

Game's over, and fuck you Jimson. It's not my fault that you guys couldn't get your shit together by deadline. No one gets access to docs because I don't fucking care anymore, I hope you all enjoyed ruining my game, and there won't be another.


About to watch Mad Max again. Just thought all of you guys would like to know.

Also, yeah I kinda rushed it. I had a hard time even coming up with a base idea. All the other prompts I was like, oh hell yeah! I can totally write something for this! They were just all long past. What I wrote for this prompt was just spur of the moment, Oh poo poo I have no idea what to write let me just start writing.

SurreptitiousMuffin
Mar 21, 2010

I got it wrong. Look, I'm well aware I got it wrong and uh, I got it wrong.


I've contacted the two other judges about the prompt and have the post written up and ready to post. If they don't reply in the next 15 minutes, I assume they consented.

sebmojo posted:

Huh.

SO LET IT BE WRITTEN

SO LET IT BE DONE
Deal.

The Saddest Rhino
Apr 29, 2009

I could hear the roots of loneliness creeping through me when the world was hushed at four o'clock in the morning


I have only just watched Mad Max II and III the first time ever in my life yesterday. Suddenly everything is making sense.

SurreptitiousMuffin
Mar 21, 2010

I got it wrong. Look, I'm well aware I got it wrong and uh, I got it wrong.


hay hay Sebmojo. Hay Sebmojo. Sebmojo. I've got something for you.

Thunderdome VII: The goons who lose will pay the highest price.

I asked last week if anyone knew the cantata I was riffing off and noone answered. Not one of you recognised Carmina Burana, one of the best-known classical (Late Romantic/German Expressionist, specifically) pieces of all time. Fortuna Imperiatrix Mundi, bitches. Well Thunderdome, it's time to complete your educations and dredge up the forgotten lore because we're getting motherfucking classical up in this piece.

Remember in high school when your English teacher said you were going to learn "Iambic Pentameter" tomorrow so you decided to stay home and jack off to your dad's old playboy collection? Me neither. Point being, your challenge this week is:

Write a piece of blank verse poetry about a journey.

What is blank verse? This is:

John Motherfucking Milton posted:

O Hell! what doe mine eyes with grief behold,
Into our room of bliss thus high advanc’t
Creatures of other mould, earth-born perhaps,
Not Spirits, yet to heav’nly Spirits bright
Little inferior; whom my thoughts pursue
With wonder, and could love, so lively shines
In them Divine resemblance, and such grace
The hand that formd them on thir shape hath pourd.
Blank verse is unrhymed iambic pentameter. A line of iambic pentameter consists of ten beats, divided into five iambs. Iambic Pentameter = five iambs. An iamb is a pair of beats with the stress falling on the second beat. If the stress does not fall on the second beat it is not an iamb and you have failed your family, house and nation.

Well, that's a lie. If the stress on the first beat, it's called a trochee. If it's on both, it's a spondee and if it's on neither, it's pyrrhic. These are called substitutions and you are allowed no more than two per line. Get that? It's iambic pentameter, so a majority of the line must be made up of iambs. A good guide can be found here.

And of course:

Stuporstar posted:

Executive Order: Next week your main character must wear a silly hat, toupee, or full wig, regardless of context or what the judges come up with for a prompt. I won't be judging because I'll be on vacation, but that doesn't matter. I want to see ridiculous headgear. NO FEDORAS.

Because it's poetry and poetry doesn't necessarily have a main character, I'm switching this up to the following:

Your poem must contain reference to a silly hat, toupee or full wig. Considering the prompt, this headgear is allowed to be metaphorical but it must be silly. Bonus points to anyone who can make Stuporstar laugh.

Judges: Myself, Fanky Malloons and Bad Seafood.
Word Count: 750. Poetry's strength is being able to say a lot while writing very little, so consider that an upper limit, not a goal.
Deadlines: Entry before Midnight, September 19th and completed work posted by Midnight, September 21st (GMT).

In addition, each judge will have two hidden hats: a surprise bonus hat and a hidden dog-poo poo bullet hat. If you write about the former, you get bonus points. If you write about the latter, you lose points. We won't be telling each other our hats, so it's entirely possible to get penalized and rewarded with the same hat. Good luck. You'll need it.

p.s. while you're in a poetic state of mind, check out the Daily Poetry Thread, filled with sexy people doing awesome things.

---

Entrants:

sebmojo finds a way to force sci-fi into loving everything.
Wrageowrapper loves the sea almost as much as me.
Chairchucker wrote something actually pretty funny this week holy crap guys.
Bear Sleuth has reached CHIM.
Sitting Here is a poet ... with a shotgun.
Jon Joe is now on the no-fly list. [LATE ENTRANT . Saved only by the grace of Fanky.]
toanoradian is ballsier than he is wise.
Noah knows the ancient fish slapping art.
Black Griffon writes about anime or something? I don't know.
Jonked shows up in the killfeed as [lucky bastard].
Dr. Kloctopussy has yet to hear my true thu'um.
Erik Shawn-Bohner stalks New Orleans with a knife.
Martello turned up drunk on the New Vegas turnpike.
budgeinspector has the bipartisan party plan.

The Dickhead List, who came late but fought anyway:

Bassetking is a drunk hipster on Wednesday afternoon.
Kangaroojunk, why don't you take a seat over there?

The following losers submitted nothing:

Jimson - committed honourable seppuku.

Zack_Gochuck
Benagain
Y Kant Ozma Post


dreadmojo
Oct 23, 2010



Legit Cyberpunk

SurreptitiousMuffin posted:

hay hay Sebmojo. Hay Sebmojo. Sebmojo. I've got something for you.

Oh, yes. This is going to be great.

JimsonTheBetrayer
Oct 13, 2010

Game's over, and fuck you Jimson. It's not my fault that you guys couldn't get your shit together by deadline. No one gets access to docs because I don't fucking care anymore, I hope you all enjoyed ruining my game, and there won't be another.


This one is gonna be a hard one, I think I might want to torture myself though so count me in.

Jonked
Feb 15, 2005

by exmarx


Oh gently caress. I've got to admit, actually trying to write Iambic Pentameter feels me with a deep and abiding sense of dread, and seeing that prompt really made me consider bowing out. But I'm in this to push my own limits, so gently caress it.

I'm in.

SurreptitiousMuffin
Mar 21, 2010

I got it wrong. Look, I'm well aware I got it wrong and uh, I got it wrong.


breaking kayfabe: Blank Verse is actually pretty easy to write in. Try to wrap your head around the idea of an iamb and the rest will fall into place. There's a reason half of English poetic canon is written in BV.

If it's too difficult for you sunshine, try a loving sestina. RX was thinking about it, I swear to God. Sestinas are to poets as the aristocrats is to comedians: we bring it out while we're drunk as poo poo to show everyone else at the party how terrible a person we are. It's poetic waterboarding.

Wrageowrapper
Apr 30, 2009

DRINK! ARSE! FECKIN CHRISTMAS!

I am in on this.

Though I am a little surprised that we are not required to record our poems and post that rather than just post the words. Isn't poetry suppose to be spoken not read.

Jonked
Feb 15, 2005

by exmarx


SurreptitiousMuffin posted:

breaking kayfabe
Oh, I know it's not that bad. I got my head around it easily enough in that Intro to Poetry class half a decade ago. It's just actually trying to write using rules and shits, man. I'm a rule breaker, I don't follow what The Authority tells me to do.

Bad Seafood
Dec 10, 2010

If you must blink, do it now.


Wrageowrapper posted:

Though I am a little surprised that we are not required to record our poems and post that rather than just post the words. Isn't poetry suppose to be spoken not read.
I'll be reading all submissions aloud to determine their quality.

My apartment isn't soundproof, so if the neighbors or Jehovah's Witness knock and complain about it, consider your entry disqualified.

toanoradian
May 30, 2011

The happiest waffligator


When I saw that SurreptitiousMuffin was one of the judges, I instantly think "Oh, poo poo, poetry is going to be in this." So I went ahead and borrowed Stephen Fry's The Ode Less Travelled and was reading it when I saw the prompt posted. For once I am not surprised.

Doesn't change the fact that for me poetry is another language entirely though. This is going to be a tough week.


SurreptitiousMuffin posted:

I asked last week if anyone knew the cantata I was riffing off and noone answered.

quote:

if it's on neither, it's phyric.

I think there are misspellings here.

SurreptitiousMuffin
Mar 21, 2010

I got it wrong. Look, I'm well aware I got it wrong and uh, I got it wrong.


Wrageowrapper posted:

I am in on this.

Though I am a little surprised that we are not required to record our poems and post that rather than just post the words. Isn't poetry suppose to be spoken not read.
Not everyone has recording equipment. If you want to read your own and/or someone else's and post it up to tindeck, feel free.

e: noone is a word. Prescriptivists must die.







i did get pyrrhic wrong though yeah

budgieinspector
Mar 24, 2006

According to my research,
these would appear to be
Budgerigars.



Well, poo poo -- half the reason I've been lax about Thunderdome for the past couple weeks has been the amount of homework and reviewing I've been doing for one poetry class in preparation for another that starts in ten days. Guess I'm in.

Noah
May 31, 2011

Come at me baby bitch


Oh, why not. In.

SurreptitiousMuffin
Mar 21, 2010

I got it wrong. Look, I'm well aware I got it wrong and uh, I got it wrong.


Because I'm a huge nerd, both my bonus hat and penalty hat have been chosen from this list. That page has rather a large selection of hats, many of which are exceptionally silly. Use it as you see fit.

e: while Paradise Lost is considered the archetypical example of blank verse in Western canon and the example I gave is a great piece of poetry, I've just realised it plays with the rules a lot and might not be a great example for y'all. Here's something a bit neater, if it helps.

Twelfth Night 1:1. Will "the ill" Shakespeare posted:

If music be the food of love, play on;
Give me excess of it, that, surfeiting,
The appetite may sicken, and so die.
That strain again! it had a dying fall:
O, it came o'er my ear like the sweet sound,
That breathes upon a bank of violets.

Chairchucker
Nov 14, 2006

The man was stunningly well dressed. He had a smart looking jacket, and a really neat looking cape, the lining of which was shimmering and sparkling in more than Oriental splendour, which is a great deal of splendour indeed, just ask Kipling.

Stuporstar posted:


Chairchucker - More Small Than Medium
DQed for formatting. Every paragraph should be double-spaced. Every one. The woman who talks to ghosts is an awesome character though.


I'm a maverick! A loose cannon! I space my paragraphs however I want! I bow to no man!

Oh well, at least my disqualification somehow didn't make me the loser. I wonder what non-story related transgression I can get penalised for this week!


I am going to lose all my points this week, I can feel it. I'm in by the way, but drat, poetry?

Black Griffon
Mar 12, 2005

Now, in the quantum moment before the closure, when all become one. One moment left. One point of space and time. I know who you are.

You are destiny.


I am so in. Believe.

Wrageowrapper posted:

I am in on this.

Though I am a little surprised that we are not required to record our poems and post that rather than just post the words. Isn't poetry suppose to be spoken not read.

My handsome, dashing voice will roam through the dome.

Bear Sleuth
Jul 17, 2011



Well dang I just found this topic and was all excited to write some fiction and now you're saying we've got to write poetry? Guess it's time to learn how to write a poem.

So put me in coach, I'll win one for the team! (I haven't seen Bad News Bears, the Thunderdome is the name of the little league, right?)

SurreptitiousMuffin
Mar 21, 2010

I got it wrong. Look, I'm well aware I got it wrong and uh, I got it wrong.


Black Griffon posted:

My handsome, dashing voice will roam through the dome.
Oh man, this is so close to a great line of IP. Cut 'through' and it works.

I'm not sure if that was intentional or not.

Chairchucker
Nov 14, 2006

The man was stunningly well dressed. He had a smart looking jacket, and a really neat looking cape, the lining of which was shimmering and sparkling in more than Oriental splendour, which is a great deal of splendour indeed, just ask Kipling.

At first I wasn't sure if I could manage Iambic Pentameter but then I remembered the dude rapping Shakespeare in 10 Things I Hate About You and I'm pretty sure I'm all over it now. I just have to listen to some rap throughout the week and I'll be set.

Fanky Malloons
Aug 21, 2010

Is your social worker inside that horse?


Jonked posted:

Oh, I know it's not that bad. I got my head around it easily enough in that Intro to Poetry class half a decade ago. It's just actually trying to write using rules and shits, man. I'm a rule breaker, I don't follow what The Authority tells me to do.

On that note, I may allow some creative cheating to slide. But you better cheat spectacularly, or I'll kill disqualify you.

Chairchucker
Nov 14, 2006

The man was stunningly well dressed. He had a smart looking jacket, and a really neat looking cape, the lining of which was shimmering and sparkling in more than Oriental splendour, which is a great deal of splendour indeed, just ask Kipling.

The first to enter the Thunderdome this week! The first to take a bold step! The first to throw down the gauntlet!

The first to die!

His Papal Majesty

The pope sat, regal, in his Popemobile,
He clutched his Popestaff, pulled his Popehat on.
His Popechauffeur began to pull away,
They drove out now to join the Popeparade.
The pope’s employees knew their time was now;
They must work hard, such was the pope’s decree.
They scurried forth between the Popetrees tall,
The Popewall gave them shade as they all toiled.
Out through the gate now came the Popemobile,
Down from Pope Road, turning onto Pope Lane.
Pope Avenue was next, ‘round the Popepond,
To where all the pope’s people stood and waved.
They slowed down as they passed through the Popecrowd,
His Popehand strong, he gave them a Popewave.
A Popecheer went up as they went on through,
Pope pope hurray, and long may he Popereign.
Too soon the Popeparade drew to a close,
The Popemobile rolled back from whence it came.
The Pope climbed from his Popeseat, all Poped out,
Into Popebed, where Popesleep would await.

Zack_Gochuck
Jan 3, 2007

Stupid Wrestling People


I am totally tone deaf and I am totally in.

Chairchucker
Nov 14, 2006

The man was stunningly well dressed. He had a smart looking jacket, and a really neat looking cape, the lining of which was shimmering and sparkling in more than Oriental splendour, which is a great deal of splendour indeed, just ask Kipling.


Also there was one terrible pun I missed, but I checked and someone had me covered:



Obviously, the sung version of my poem would feature in this movie.

Bad Seafood
Dec 10, 2010

If you must blink, do it now.


Chairchucker posted:

His Popehand strong
+1 just for this.

But also -1 because seriously.

Martello
Apr 29, 2012

by XyloJW


Chairchucker posted:


His Papal Majesty

I'm not sure anyone can top this.

Benagain
Oct 10, 2007

Student of the principle art of posting

Fun Shoe

I'm in, because that pope hat thing is so annoyingly good that I must attempt to best it despite the near-certainty that I won't. Such is the glory and despair of Thunderdome.

Dr. Kloctopussy
Apr 22, 2003


In for atrocious poetry time.

Fanky Malloons
Aug 21, 2010

Is your social worker inside that horse?


Dr. Kloctopussy posted:

In for AMAZING poetry time.

FTFY

Erik Shawn-Bohner
Mar 21, 2010

by XyloJW


How do you do a poetry? Thanks in advance.

Black Griffon
Mar 12, 2005

Now, in the quantum moment before the closure, when all become one. One moment left. One point of space and time. I know who you are.

You are destiny.


SurreptitiousMuffin posted:

Oh man, this is so close to a great line of IP. Cut 'through' and it works.

I'm not sure if that was intentional or not.

It wasn't, but I guess I just have a natural talent from it if you remove one word.

Also: Space Opera poem, most def.

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007


Blood Empress of Thunderdome

Tap to emit spores


Clapping Larry

I'm in, I don't know what I'd do every week if I weren't panicking about an internet forums fiction submission.

SurreptitiousMuffin
Mar 21, 2010

I got it wrong. Look, I'm well aware I got it wrong and uh, I got it wrong.


Chairchucker posted:

The first to enter the Thunderdome this week! The first to take a bold step! The first to throw down the gauntlet!

The first to die!

His Papal Majesty

The pope sat, regal, in his Popemobile,
He clutched his Popestaff, pulled his Popehat on.
His Popechauffeur began to pull away,
They drove out now to join the Popeparade.
The pope’s employees knew their time was now;
They must work hard, such was the pope’s decree.
They scurried forth between the Popetrees tall,
The Popewall gave them shade as they all toiled.
Out through the gate now came the Popemobile,
Down from Pope Road, turning onto Pope Lane.
Pope Avenue was next, ‘round the Popepond,
To where all the pope’s people stood and waved.
They slowed down as they passed through the Popecrowd,
His Popehand strong, he gave them a Popewave.
A Popecheer went up as they went on through,
Pope pope hurray, and long may he Popereign.
Too soon the Popeparade drew to a close,
The Popemobile rolled back from whence it came.
The Pope climbed from his Popeseat, all Poped out,
Into Popebed, where Popesleep would await.
The bar has been set. I'm going to ask pipes! (or whoever does the avatars) about my suggestions from earlier on: if someone with a loser av wins, they can have it taken down.

More, more! I tire of prattle, more blood in the water!

Fanky Malloons
Aug 21, 2010

Is your social worker inside that horse?


Since SurreptitiousMuffin and Bad Seafood both claim to be in 'different' 'timezones,' I will henceforth be keeping order in here whilst they are sleeping or whatever it is they do in their moon countries.

The judges have eyes on you AT ALL TIMES, BITCHES.

Stuporstar
May 5, 2008

Where do fists come from?


sebmojo posted:

Stuporstar did you just... disqualify the judges? Metal as gently caress.

In any case. I'm in.

That's right. No more slacking off for the judges. The bread and circuses must continue to sate the unruly rabble.

Chairchucker posted:

The first to enter the Thunderdome this week! The first to take a bold step! The first to throw down the gauntlet!

The first to die!

His Papal Majesty

The pope sat, regal, in his Popemobile,
He clutched his Popestaff, pulled his Popehat on.
His Popechauffeur began to pull away,
They drove out now to join the Popeparade.
The pope’s employees knew their time was now;
They must work hard, such was the pope’s decree.
They scurried forth between the Popetrees tall,
The Popewall gave them shade as they all toiled.
Out through the gate now came the Popemobile,
Down from Pope Road, turning onto Pope Lane.
Pope Avenue was next, ‘round the Popepond,
To where all the pope’s people stood and waved.
They slowed down as they passed through the Popecrowd,
His Popehand strong, he gave them a Popewave.
A Popecheer went up as they went on through,
Pope pope hurray, and long may he Popereign.
Too soon the Popeparade drew to a close,
The Popemobile rolled back from whence it came.
The Pope climbed from his Popeseat, all Poped out,
Into Popebed, where Popesleep would await.

YAY! I like where this is going already.

Erik Shawn-Bohner
Mar 21, 2010

by XyloJW


Yes, cheer and flap your jowls in admiration. Just wait until she starts charging taxes.

Erik Shawn-Bohner
Mar 21, 2010

by XyloJW


Shall I part my hair behind? Do I dare to eat a peach?
I shall wear white flannel trousers, and walk upon the beach.
I have heard the mermaids singing, each to each.

I do not think that they will sing to me.

I have seen them riding seaward on the waves
Combing the white hair of the waves blown back
When the wind blows the water white and black.
We have lingered in the chambers of the sea
By sea-girls wreathed with seaweed red and brown
Till human voices wake us, and we drown.

""

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Chairchucker
Nov 14, 2006

The man was stunningly well dressed. He had a smart looking jacket, and a really neat looking cape, the lining of which was shimmering and sparkling in more than Oriental splendour, which is a great deal of splendour indeed, just ask Kipling.

This is clearly a pro-pope audience. Perhaps I should stick to pope fiction from now on.

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