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V for Vegas posted:Confirmed winners in the first round - Thanks! I'm actually surprised, because for some reason I found that really difficult to write, and therefore assumed that that meant it was terrible. Nevertheless: 
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Dec 8, 2012 06:09
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| # ? Apr 27, 2024 13:58 |
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 ROUND TWO One of the best flash fiction authors was, of course, Donald Barthelme. I first read about his stuff a while ago in George Saunder's book - the Braindead Megaphone where Saunders dissects Barthelme's story - The School. Saunders of course is a great writer himself, who has written a bunch of funny short stories, like Comm Comm Given this week's stories have, for the most part, been pretty grim (honourable exception being LordVonEarlDuke ), for the Battle Royale with Chicken and the Battle Royale with Cheese here is your assignment: Write a humourous satirical story. 500 words. The losers have to incorporate 'cheese' into their story. The winners have to incorporate 'chicken'. It can be central or tangential to the story.No other rules. (Etherwind, if you make a post asking what 'no other rules means' so help me God...). You have 48 hours from NOW (that's Sunday midnight eastern, Sunday 9pm western, god knows when European)
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Dec 8, 2012 06:11
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quote:Bear Sleuth v Fanky Malloons Fanky Malloons. Obviously 'shawl' and I'm mortified that I missed it during my edits.
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Dec 8, 2012 06:44
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Since the other two are obviously bums who have no jobs, I'm posting this without comments til I get some time. Or never, whichever happens sooner. SurreptitiousMuffin v Erik Shawn-Bohner SurreptitiousMuffin Sitting Here v Etherwind Sitting Here Jonked v Jeza Jonked Capntastic v Zack_Gochuck Zack_Gochuck Bad Seafood v Tender Child Loins Tender Child Loins The Saddest Rhino v sebmojo sebmojo AutoSnakes v Ronnie_Long Ronnie_Long (win by forfeit) Benagain v Noah Noah Velyoukai v sentientcarbon sentientcarbon Found Sound v Seldom Posts Seldom Posts Canadian Surf Club v Rose Wreck Canadian Surf Club Peel v Greatbacon Greatbacon Bear Sleuth v Fanky Malloons Fanky Malloons LordVonEarlDuke v Martello LordVonEarlDuke (I was DQ'd otherwise i'd have one bitch  )I'll edit in the rest so my judge post isn't so far down the page from the others.
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Dec 8, 2012 06:51
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Well, gently caress. Congratulations. Anyway, V for Vegas posted:500 words. ... No other rules. (Etherwind, if you make a post asking what 'no other rules means' so help me God...). No worries man, I'm not that dumb. ...By the way: is it 500 words minimum, or maximum? 
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Dec 8, 2012 06:59
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Etherwind posted:Well, gently caress. Congratulations.  : Watch out, Graham!
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Dec 8, 2012 07:02
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Congrats ZG you cretin. I hope you're happy!!
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Dec 8, 2012 07:09
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F64wDQJLWMQ Etherwind, you've been bitten by a POISONOUS snake. As such, your ability to act has been compromised, and you must accomplish your entry in only 400 words. Exactly. Including the title.
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Dec 8, 2012 07:12
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Nope! I'm not going to compound my dumb joke with your dumber ideas. You'll get a 500-or-so word entry. 
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Dec 8, 2012 07:23
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Etherwind posted:Nope! I'm not going to compound my dumb joke with your dumber ideas. You'll get a 500-or-so word entry. Let me look into my crystal ball and see what I see in your near future:  Looks about right.
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Dec 8, 2012 07:26
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Man, please, go ahead and buy me the custom title now: save me having to deal with your bullshit. I'm still writing the entry.
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Dec 8, 2012 07:27
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You realize we make the rules in this thread, that's like kinda the whole point, right? More importantly, sebmojo and sentientcarbon are now confirmed winners with my judgment matching ESBs on both those stories.
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Dec 8, 2012 07:31
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Yeah. If you don't like what I submit, you can call me the loser and move on.
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Dec 8, 2012 07:34
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It's gettin' pretty hostile here in the Thunderdome. Let's all take a step back then take two steps forward and kick each other in the head.
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Dec 8, 2012 08:03
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LordVonEarlDuke posted:It's gettin' pretty hostile here in the Thunderdome. Let's all take a step back then take two steps forward and kick each other in the head. bitch
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Dec 8, 2012 08:07
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losersaywhat e: cool new av
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Dec 8, 2012 08:09
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Martello posted:bitch 
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Dec 8, 2012 08:09
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Dec 8, 2012 08:10
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Dec 8, 2012 08:10
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LordVonEarlDuke posted:losersaywhat I also have a cool new gf irl. your mom lol
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Dec 8, 2012 08:11
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mrs vonearlduke is a saint e: the patron saint of MAD ORAL
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Dec 8, 2012 08:12
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In celebration of the first round, I'm getting drunk for alla you. Don't forget to wake aunty up when the next round's over. Also: 
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Dec 8, 2012 08:17
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Etherwind posted:Well, gently caress. Congratulations. Yeah, I'm being soft. Anyone who has a problem with that speak up then get on your knees, because my dick's going in your eye socket.
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Dec 8, 2012 08:31
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SurreptitiousMuffin posted:Putting you up against Sitting Here is kind of like throwing a middle-aged woman at a rhino. If I didn't know better, I'd say they were setting you up to fall there. Solid entry anyway. Keep hacking at it. Please post in this thread thanks in advance 
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Dec 8, 2012 08:32
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Martello posted:Please post in this thread thanks in advance
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Dec 8, 2012 08:50
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Dec 8, 2012 08:55
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Dec 8, 2012 08:57
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SurreptitiousMuffin posted:Putting you up against Sitting Here is kind of like throwing a middle-aged woman at a rhino. Sebmojo was a very tough middle-aged woman. I just got back so I'm going to do what is asked of me re: baguettes.
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Dec 8, 2012 11:20
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Martello posted:Hey guys, did you know I like to post in FYAD? Because I do. Let me tell you more about how I like to post in FYAD. FYAD guys.
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Dec 8, 2012 11:28
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Whoa, Martello posts in FYAD? Can I... can I touch you, Martello? With my mouth?
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Dec 8, 2012 12:01
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Satire? Nasty. Congrats GB, I don't think mine quite held together so not a big surprise.
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Dec 8, 2012 13:03
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V for Vegas posted:Sorry Rose Wreck, I know that the Nails may not be your thing, but just reading the occasional cameo of an album cover in the story was kind of jarring when reading it. I went after the spirit of the thing! If I lost I lost, but that was a thematic story with one woman unable to break out of the corrupt throes of the recording industry (unlike the later band) with song titles sprinkled in and at least one reference to the artist's playing style. And some other stuff because what is an ouvre anyway, is that like a window? Congrats CSC. [e: Also I literally set it in the industrial underground, I hope someone caught that.]
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Dec 8, 2012 14:50
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If it's not too much trouble could I get a little more feedback on my story? I won't get better if I don't know what I'm doing wrong. Not a full critique or anything, just a couple lines about why it didn't work (aside from that typo) would be much apprciated. Thanks.
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Dec 8, 2012 14:57
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Dec 8, 2012 15:14
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You did well to best me, sentientcarbon. Now you just have to watch out for the legitimate monsters you're up against instead of an old man-avatar.
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Dec 8, 2012 15:39
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Peel posted:Satire? Nasty. Well thank you. I did enjoy the fact that your story managed to stay true to the prompt and undermine it at the same time. Good luck with your satirical cheese.
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Dec 8, 2012 16:24
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'Grats Jonked, my last second botch-job of a story deservedly lost. Good luck in flaying the other winners and bring me back a skin cape. EDIT: I DON'T EVEN READ THE RULES SO I'M AN IDIOT.
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Dec 8, 2012 17:42
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Prompts with pictures had a 1000 word minimum, not an 800 word maximum. http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3499761&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=59#post410269558 (minimum word counts are the devil)
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Dec 8, 2012 17:48
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Peel posted:Prompts with pictures had a 1000 word minimum, not an 800 word maximum. That makes me a moron. Revising.
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Dec 8, 2012 17:49
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| # ? Apr 27, 2024 13:58 |
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Jeza, you're right about one thing though, people like LORDVONEARLDUKE shouldn't have won because they grossly exceeded the word oval office. Dukey-boy had the fortune of going against a judge who wasn't going to move on to the finals anyway. And he wrote a drat good story. 
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Dec 8, 2012 17:56
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