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DaveSauce
Feb 15, 2004

Oh, how awkward.


When is about the right time to consolidate naps again?

Our 12 mo (next week) has been taking 1 nap at day care for a while now. Thing is, he still takes 2 good naps at home on the weekends. Looking at the schedule, it seems really consistent, so I think they're consolidating nap time for the room since it's older infants. I didn't think they did this until the next room (24+ mo).

Wondering if we should raise a fuss about this, since he's kinda tired and cranky in the evening, or if we should just let it slide.

Our 3.5 year old never was a good napper so consolidation for her just made sense.

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Eggnogium
Jun 1, 2010

Never give an inch! Hnnnghhhhhh!

Our kid just out of the blue switched to one nap at just before 12 months. This was 2 months before he switched to a daycare classroom that would have forced the issue. One day at home he just didnít tucker out all morning and only got sleepy after lunch and then it just stuck.

davebo
Nov 15, 2006

Parallel lines do meet, but they do it incognito

College Slice

Joey Steel posted:

I feel like a colossal idiot.

You think 6mo is bad? We almost hit 11 before I could convince my wife to let him nap on his own instead of me just sitting quietly in the dark with him sleeping on a boppi pillow in my lap five days a week for over an hour, hoping he had really fallen asleep so I could start using my phone without the light waking him.

remigious
May 13, 2009

Destruction comes inevitably




Hell Gem

How do you get your baby to sleep without rocking? Tell me your secrets Iím dying!

L0cke17
Nov 29, 2013



remigious posted:

How do you get your baby to sleep without rocking? Tell me your secrets Iím dying!

We just put him down. Sometimes he cried, sometimes he didnít. If heís still upset we go back in in 20 minutes and decide nap time isnít a thing right then.

remigious
May 13, 2009

Destruction comes inevitably




Hell Gem

L0cke17 posted:

We just put him down. Sometimes he cried, sometimes he didnít. If heís still upset we go back in in 20 minutes and decide nap time isnít a thing right then.

Ok. I think the child is almost old enough that we can try that, he is 3.5 months now.

devmd01
Mar 7, 2006

Elektronik
Supersonik


I really, really appreciate that my relationship with my wife is such that when she is trying to talk to me while I am in the middle of cleaning poop out of undies, I can effectively tell her to gently caress off

L0cke17
Nov 29, 2013



remigious posted:

Ok. I think the child is almost old enough that we can try that, he is 3.5 months now.

Oh, we didn't do that til kiddo was 5 months old.

Pre 5 months we found the easiest way to get him to sleep was to lay down with him on my chest in his bedroom til he passed out. Just the motion from breathing was usually enough. Took 15-30 minutes most nights.

Joey Steel
Jul 24, 2019

Big Dictatorship-of-the-proletariat Energy


remigious posted:

How do you get your baby to sleep without rocking? Tell me your secrets Iím dying!

Put baby in crib after they're old enough to roll over from front to back and back to front, and wait 20 minutes to see if they put themselves down. Have monitor to watch them from outside the room.

I also made sure to use blackout curtains in front of 100% light blocking window film, and a white noise machine at near max volume (Hatch mini for me) which probably also helps.

wizzardstaff
Apr 6, 2018




Seconding the white noise and blackout curtains as must-haves. And remember your lessons from eclipse watching: blocking 99% of the sunís light is nowhere near as effective as blocking 100% of it. The sun is very very bright.

davebo
Nov 15, 2006

Parallel lines do meet, but they do it incognito

College Slice

Yeah if there was any light in the room he would just stay up looking at everything. We had to get double blackout curtains on each window, then stick cardboard on one of the windows and another in the adjacent bathroom because light leaked in all around the door frame. And the white noise machine to drown out all the idiots going through the neighborhood with huge mufflers on their 4cylinder engine econoboxes.

In terms of sleep training at night my wife completely jumped the gun and tried doing the Ferber method at like 3 months which failed so hard she wouldn't let us try again until about 6 months. I was always on duty from 11pm-6pm before she was working from home, so whenever he'd wake up at night I'd just sleep the rest of the night in his room because once you did get him down good loving luck opening the door to get out without waking him again. Boy it's nice to remember this stuff now and then just to reaffirm why I wouldn't want to start over from scratch with the added hassle of already having a 2 year old.

femcastra
Apr 25, 2008

If you want him,
come and knit him!


I found settling easier by necessity the second time around. We did sleep school with my first because I had gotten into the habit of cosleeping for naps and I was driving myself bonkers with no time for myself.

Used the same strategies but gentler right from the start with the newborn - put her down on a safe surface often, swaddle and white noise in a dark room for sleeps. Attempt as often as possible to just put her down drowsy, and go in to settle when needed. It helped that I was chasing around a toddler all day and didnít have time to sit in a darkened room with a baby in my arms. Used a dummy until the 4 month regression nightmare when I encouraged her to find her thumb, and sheís been alternately a finger and thumb sucker since.

Everything has been easier sleep wise with the second because she self settles.

Eggnogium
Jun 1, 2010

Never give an inch! Hnnnghhhhhh!

We switched to cry it out around 4 months because we were getting frustrated with every sleep starting with a 30-60 minute rocking and shushing fest and finally snapped and put him in his bassinet and he fell asleep in 5 minutes. Turns out some babies just want to be left alone.

We still kept feeding him whenever he woke up until 6 months but after each feed it was just back into swaddle and bassinet and heíd pass out after 5 minutes of sobbing.

citybeatnik
Mar 1, 2013

You Are All
WEIRDOS





Our toddler has figured out how to climb up on the couch. And of course he is now obsessed with doing that constantly before proceeding to try and run along it.

How the gently caress do we make sure this tiny maniac doesn't leap over the edge and hurt himself?

wizzardstaff
Apr 6, 2018




a) Give absolutely zero emotional reaction when he climbs up, beyond what is necessary to physically intervene if he's in danger of hurting himself
b) Put pillows on the floor

Sipher
Jan 14, 2008
Cryptic

citybeatnik posted:

Our toddler has figured out how to climb up on the couch. And of course he is now obsessed with doing that constantly before proceeding to try and run along it.

How the gently caress do we make sure this tiny maniac doesn't leap over the edge and hurt himself?

Same, exactly same, within the last week. He currently thinks it's hilarious when you stop him.

life is killing me
Oct 28, 2007



Our first we rocked and bounced to sleep with heavy shushing and heíd fight and fight, moving his feet and squirming just to squirm. But if we ever did try to put him down in bed while awake he got irate. Felt like we couldnít win and to this day he struggles with sleep and we regret it. Granted heís gotten a lot better about sleeping thru the night versus what he was doing given we can now just walk out of the room at night and he will go to sleep in his own provided we leave his door open.

Our daughter, though, is gonna get sleep trained. Weíve been down the path of not doing it or starting and not sticking to it, so we know if we donít we are hosed for sleep and more importantly so is she. We got a book for it, and itís relatively short but I canít remember what itís called. Basically it is just revolving around setting feedings on a twelve hour schedule and making sure they are getting a certain amount each time, not letting them fall asleep while feeding, and putting them down awake. When they cry you arenít supposed to pick them up unless they are really distressed. The feeding schedule is really strict. I hope we can manage all of that.

calandryll
Apr 25, 2003

Ask me where I do my best drinking!



Pillbug

It's amazing watching the development of our daughter. She really loves 80s music videos. Sledgehammer came on and we've watched it so many time she was singing along with it. She was missing some words but the words she knew she hit right on the beat.

She definitely has a preference for 80s music.

Joey Steel
Jul 24, 2019

Big Dictatorship-of-the-proletariat Energy


My son will giggle at the first few bars of Folsom Prison and Boy Named Sue and will just kick and smile happily whenever it's sung to him.

His great grandfather sent him a silver dollar coin when he found out.

citybeatnik
Mar 1, 2013

You Are All
WEIRDOS





We're now busy shopping around for floor pillows because that's cheaper than new furniture.

Can't wait for him to superman leap off of it. Or for the dogs to sleep on them. Or the 5yo to decide they're her pillows and move them.

L0cke17
Nov 29, 2013



citybeatnik posted:

We're now busy shopping around for floor pillows because that's cheaper than new furniture.

Can't wait for him to superman leap off of it. Or for the dogs to sleep on them. Or the 5yo to decide they're her pillows and move them.

This is what we have, totally worth it. Also very easy to clean when he spills food on it.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B07BXMCNM8


Unrelated: when do babies start doing actual words?? He just sorta has like 5 or 6 different grunts and will babble at us in repeated syllables like "dadadadadadadadada" but no words yet.

Dobbs_Head
May 8, 2008

nano nano nano


BadSamaritan posted:

Iím looking forward to when my baby is old enough that he doesnít yell about the farting/pooping experience. Every. Morning. At 4:30.

Alterian
Jan 28, 2003



My 8 year old keeps telling me he has dreams where he gets to be vaccinated and no longer needs a mask.

KirbyKhan
Mar 20, 2009




Soiled Meat

remigious posted:

How do you get your baby to sleep without rocking? Tell me your secrets I’m dying!

Oh when we have him in the lil grub velcro swaddle, there's some rocking.

I put my hand on his chest. That's just like good enough and I can keep that going for a good 20 min until sleep. It is a physical contact, but less pressure

citybeatnik
Mar 1, 2013

You Are All
WEIRDOS





L0cke17 posted:

This is what we have, totally worth it. Also very easy to clean when he spills food on it.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B07BXMCNM8


Unrelated: when do babies start doing actual words?? He just sorta has like 5 or 6 different grunts and will babble at us in repeated syllables like "dadadadadadadadada" but no words yet.

My wife's super worried about him breaking his neck or something but i'm not sure if she's going overboard.

As for words we were told that plague babies are a little delayed in words due to them not being in daycare. Ours still does that save for just a few mamas and dadas.

wizzardstaff
Apr 6, 2018




Yeah, our plague baby is still barely showing any words at 2.25 years, though sheís had an explosion of repeating stuff back at us in the last couple weeks. She understands us fine though, so Iím hoping when she starts preschool in a few months itíll all catch up.

Eggnogium
Jun 1, 2010

Never give an inch! Hnnnghhhhhh!

My plague baby is in daycare but still seems slightly speech delayed compared to the norm. He is 16 months and has two words: mama and owl. Sometimes we think there is a new one and get excited but then he never says it again.

KirbyKhan
Mar 20, 2009




Soiled Meat

BabyYaga Listicle posted:

11My Son Comes Alive When His Dad Comes Home


When you have carried a child for nine months and brought it into this world, you love it like nothing else. So when that love isn't returned, it can break you, as this mom explained:

"I am a first time mother - left a v. good job to stay at home with the baby - he is now 5 months old. I spend the whole day with him and try to play and keep him entertained and happy - sometimes he smiles but doesn't really respond if I hug or kiss him.

However he just comes alive when my husband comes home from work and is with him. I can accept being #2, but for there to be such a difference in his behaviour towards the two of us just makes me really sad and dejected."


So son has been showing a preference for me the past two days so mom has been tagging herself in the feelbad parenting articles. I'm at a loss of what I can or should do. Thinking about going out for a pack of smokes and coming back in 3 years, that'll get lil dude to stop smiling at me more than ma.

meanolmrcloud
Apr 5, 2004

rock out with your stock out



Nthing the sound machine at what I would consider very high volumes. My wife read it helped one night, and though it sounds like Niagara Falls in the nursery, the quality and quantity of sleep has increased, and we can pretty much do whatever else we want in the rest of the house without worry.

It sounds like we are lucky. At 4 months, our baby can fall asleep on the boob and transition to bassinet 90% of the time. The other 10% involves this adorable hand holding/hand pushing away motion while she drifts off.

The ped at her 4 month appointment said based on the amount of drool sheís likely experiencing teething gum irritation, which explains the torrents I guess. She also recommended starting on purťes, just to see if it can be done. Are there any veggie ones that are particularly good beyond sweet potato and carrots? Iíd be afraid to do a broccoli or bean one, and she said veggies are better than fruits so they donít get hooked on the sugar. Also, do you just plop em down and try to get a spoon in there or what.

External Organs
Mar 3, 2006

A cheerful person, he is known as the king of vulgarities (cursing?)

Baby has a red spot rash all over her stomach and front, arms, and neck. It's been about a week since her MMR vaccine and I am hoping this is a common reaction- that's what doctor google says! Her behavior is normal and she has no fever.

Nurse on call told us to give her some Benadryl to see if it gets any better. We'll see I guess!

Other options: amoxicillin allergy, milk allergy?

life is killing me
Oct 28, 2007



External Organs posted:

Baby has a red spot rash all over her stomach and front, arms, and neck. It's been about a week since her MMR vaccine and I am hoping this is a common reaction- that's what doctor google says! Her behavior is normal and she has no fever.

Nurse on call told us to give her some Benadryl to see if it gets any better. We'll see I guess!

Other options: amoxicillin allergy, milk allergy?

When our son would take antibiotics when he was younger, he would routinely get infections in his diaper area. Thinking it was some kind of non-oral thrush but IANAD. So thatís something to consider, but Iíd be surprised if it wasnít a reaction to MMR as far as your kiddo is concerned. Our NOC usually will tell us the doc wants us to bring our son into the office if they are concerned and not absolutely sure what the issue is and need to see it to really diagnose. At the same time they are trained to recognize common things and encourage you to try treating it at home so who the hell knows.

space uncle
Sep 17, 2006


meanolmrcloud posted:

Nthing the sound machine at what I would consider very high volumes. My wife read it helped one night, and though it sounds like Niagara Falls in the nursery, the quality and quantity of sleep has increased, and we can pretty much do whatever else we want in the rest of the house without worry.

It sounds like we are lucky. At 4 months, our baby can fall asleep on the boob and transition to bassinet 90% of the time. The other 10% involves this adorable hand holding/hand pushing away motion while she drifts off.

The ped at her 4 month appointment said based on the amount of drool sheís likely experiencing teething gum irritation, which explains the torrents I guess. She also recommended starting on purťes, just to see if it can be done. Are there any veggie ones that are particularly good beyond sweet potato and carrots? Iíd be afraid to do a broccoli or bean one, and she said veggies are better than fruits so they donít get hooked on the sugar. Also, do you just plop em down and try to get a spoon in there or what.

Iíve tried avocado, sweet potato, and green bean so far starting at 4 mo. Little dude hated green beans, likes sweet potatoes, had about half of his avocado tbsp before he started spitting it out.

We also have the white noise machine and mountains of drool.

Our pediatrician gave the opposite advice on fruits and veggies. Honestly how much more sugar content is in an apple vs. a sweet potato. We started with applesauce, mushed banana, pear purťe. So far pears are the losers and banana is a huge winner.

As for technique - because our guy was still a bit floppy for the high chair, we stick him on a lap. You start by resting the infant spoon on bottom lip and eventually they will open their mouth a bit, then stick it in. They wonít know how to bite or use their tongue so it will take a while to actually get the food off the spoon, you may need to do some scraping against top lip. After a few days our guy figured it out and now opens his mouth super wide as soon as he sees the spoon coming, and tries to chew on the spoon. Baby will also want to grab spoon and bowl which is a terrible idea.

BonoMan
Feb 20, 2002


Jade Ear Joe

External Organs posted:

Baby has a red spot rash all over her stomach and front, arms, and neck. It's been about a week since her MMR vaccine and I am hoping this is a common reaction- that's what doctor google says! Her behavior is normal and she has no fever.

Nurse on call told us to give her some Benadryl to see if it gets any better. We'll see I guess!

Other options: amoxicillin allergy, milk allergy?

IANAD but our second would commonly get these fm body spotty rashes at the end of normal viral sicknesses. Just a cold? It would often end in a harmless rash. Apparently it's a thing some bodies does with viral stuff.

It's most likely the MMR vaccine... Although a week out seems like a little far.

Koivunen
Oct 7, 2011

there's definitely no logic
to human behaviour

This might not be the right forum and I probably shouldnít post about it at all, but today I found out my husband has been having an affair. He said heís been unhappy in our relationship since our daughter was born. Our sonís due date is in about five weeks. My husband has been seeing this other person for about two months and says he thinks he might love her. I am absolutely crushed, this is completely out of the blue. I donít know what to do. I called in sick to work and my husband isnít staying in our home tonight. What is a person supposed to even do? I canít even think. I thought things were going fine. Yeah, being a parent is tough and changes a marriage, but I really thought we were doing fine, good actually. I donít know what to do.

redreader
Nov 2, 2009

I am the coolest person ever with my pirate chalice. Seriously.



Dinosaur Gum

I'm so sorry this happened to you. You don't deserve this. It's ok to post about it here.

Joey Steel
Jul 24, 2019

Big Dictatorship-of-the-proletariat Energy


Yeah, sounds perfectly reasonable to post about it here.

KirbyKhan
Mar 20, 2009




Soiled Meat

You will be ok, holler at some old friends to see who can watch your baby and wipe your butt. Try and set aside some time hollar at spouse out side. Spouse is still very obligated to you and coming clean does not absolve those obligations. Show time is in 5 weeks, best of luck and all the strength in the world to you.

Alterian
Jan 28, 2003



Koivunen posted:

What is a person supposed to even do? I can’t even think. I thought things were going fine. Yeah, being a parent is tough and changes a marriage, but I really thought we were doing fine, good actually. I don’t know what to do.
It's rough you are going through this right now. No matter what happens make sure you take care of yourself, especially post pardum. Do you have anybody you can rely on for emotional support?


My almost 3 year old woke up with a fever and he sounds hoarse and has a bit of a cough. Calling his ped when it opens.

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

"When you put your hand into a bunch of goo that a moment before was your quarterback's face, you'll know what to do."



Koivunen posted:

This might not be the right forum and I probably shouldnít post about it at all, but today I found out my husband has been having an affair. He said heís been unhappy in our relationship since our daughter was born. Our sonís due date is in about five weeks. My husband has been seeing this other person for about two months and says he thinks he might love her. I am absolutely crushed, this is completely out of the blue. I donít know what to do. I called in sick to work and my husband isnít staying in our home tonight. What is a person supposed to even do? I canít even think. I thought things were going fine. Yeah, being a parent is tough and changes a marriage, but I really thought we were doing fine, good actually. I donít know what to do.

Iím sorry. Thatís really awful. I would do whatever you can to call in reinforcements from friends and family who can help support you, your daughter and your new son.

Itís probably also a good idea to speak with a professional to help sort through all the stuff youíre feeling.

Also, I hope this isnít too upsetting to hear at this point, but if you decide to part ways please get a good lawyer to protect yourself and kids. This happened to my mom and she got terrible advice that left her in a lurch for years. Find somebody who is on your side who will help get you the support you deserve.

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External Organs
Mar 3, 2006

A cheerful person, he is known as the king of vulgarities (cursing?)

Koivunen posted:

This might not be the right forum and I probably shouldn’t post about it at all, but today I found out my husband has been having an affair. He said he’s been unhappy in our relationship since our daughter was born. Our son’s due date is in about five weeks. My husband has been seeing this other person for about two months and says he thinks he might love her. I am absolutely crushed, this is completely out of the blue. I don’t know what to do. I called in sick to work and my husband isn’t staying in our home tonight. What is a person supposed to even do? I can’t even think. I thought things were going fine. Yeah, being a parent is tough and changes a marriage, but I really thought we were doing fine, good actually. I don’t know what to do.

Literally said "oh no!" when I saw your post. I'm so sorry. I also remember you posting recently about your best friend leaving the area soon (are they already gone?) and honestly it's just extremely lovely because you're gonna want those extra hands and ears...

I do know that in the long run, I think you will be okay, regardless of whether you and your husband stay together or not. It may take some time and it may take some therapy - which may be more accessible than ever because of telehealth.

My wife and I had a pandemic baby and she felt extremely isolated when I went back to work - something that helped her, weirdly, was the Peanut app which I guess is like tindr for moms... it'll connect you with other moms you can chat with and form real life friendships with. She's met a handful in real life and it's been really good for her. With the due date soon it may be just something to keep in the back of your head for late night baby feeding / phone use.

I'm really sorry, and I wish I had better things to say. We are all here for you!

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