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I always felt like Push Presents were something pushed by jewelry stores and celebrities using them as yet another chance to show off some conspicuous consumption.
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May 10, 2021 14:53
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Much like baby showers, valentine's day gifts, Mother's and Father's day, etc. Just something we ignore in my family, thankfully. I mean, after we had our baby, everyone who visited would bring flowers and a small gift for the baby, but I don't think that even has a name. The concept of a push present doesn't (yet) exist here, it seems, as in nobody brings presents for the mother, not even the other parent.
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May 10, 2021 14:59
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Hippie Hedgehog posted:Maybe you didn't experience this in your first baby delivery, but my own experience was heavily colored by the fact that hospitals are optimized for resources, not for users. Yeah, first kid was a different hospital in a different state (yay being military), but her water broke, so things moved a bit quicker as far a petocin and the epidural. They did mention to my wife with this one that if someone came in active labor then they generally move ahead of us. Makes complete sense….just thinking of the sleep we could have gotten and how our kid could have stayed with us last night. Oh well.
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May 10, 2021 15:11
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nwin posted:Current status: they had us here at 6:30 am. It’s 9:45 am. Starting to get prepped for the epidural. No petocin or painful contractions yet. Why the gently caress were we here 3 hours ago? I don’t get hospitals-maybe they’re busy with other deliveries or something. Administrative poo poo. Takes time to get you in the system, get her health info all settled, get the anesthesiologist or NA in there, get the other drugs, put in the IV, etc. Same with us this last kid. We are lucky we had an appointment and they were expecting us and still it was that way. Given this is your second I can’t guarantee anything and especially because I’m not a woman and thus I lack a uterus, but my wife’s OB was like, “the second is always easier. It’ll go quicker.” My wife scoffed and was like, “Sure I’ll believe that when I see it.” Same day we went in, a couple pushes and babby was out. Not saying that absolutely will be the case but it’s nice to think about.
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May 10, 2021 15:14
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Yeah, our neighbor almost missed the birth of his second because he went to to pick up lunch and dinner, figuring that they had a long while since that was the case last time.
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May 10, 2021 15:16
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I don't know what push presents are and I ain't gonna google it because then I'm sure I'd get ads for a year. I'm guessing it's like: "ONE MORE PUSH HONEY!!" "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGHHERERRDER" "ITS A GIRL! AND HERES THE LATEST APPLE WATCH!"
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May 10, 2021 15:37
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gently caress. gently caress. Y’all better check that your anesthesiologist or NA group is in your insurance network. Because we thought we were good. Now we are paying $6000 because they are no longer in-network (they blame it on our insurance company unilaterally reducing their comp) and this has been financially a totally poo poo year for us. This amount is almost all we have in savings. Right now my only job is my company I run which is doing lovely this year and I’m currently looking for a FT job but it’s not going great so far. We simply cannot seem to win this year in terms of money. This is poo poo.
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May 10, 2021 15:39
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life is killing me posted:gently caress. gently caress. Y’all better check that your anesthesiologist or NA group is in your insurance network. Check your state laws. Some states have recently enacted laws about balance billing. Mostly regarding emergency services, but some require it to be explicitly posted or communicated to the patient in a specific way that they are responsible for out-of-network services. Also did they go out-of-network before or after services? I assume before, but if they decided after the fact then they can gently caress right off. Insurance companies are shitbags and are single-handedly loving up the American healthcare system.
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May 10, 2021 15:45
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call the hospital, and see if they can provide financial/payment assistance. When our twins were born, even after insurance, we couldn't afford the bills. We talked with the hospital, and they reduced the bills by nearly half, and have us a two year payment plan with zero interest.
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May 10, 2021 15:49
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I had never heard of a push present until someone mentioned it to my wife after her extremely long and difficult labor. She said she didn’t care and didn’t want one, but I decided to head that one off at the pass before the incredible hormone swings caused a change of opinion. So because our puppy had previously eaten her AirPods I got her a new pair. Very expensive but I’m starting to see their value now that the infant is constantly grabbing my headphone cords.
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May 10, 2021 15:51
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Lol, I realized that my mom got "push presents" for each of us, but it was basically a gift of our bithstones plus a ring that we would give to our future spouses. Mine was a black and white pearl ring we used as an engagement ring. I'll probably be getting my wife some citrine/topaz jewelry at some point that our son can eventually give to a future spouse. I think she has a necklace somewhere with all three of our birthstones she got when she decided she was having no more kids.
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May 10, 2021 15:53
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I didn't find out about push presents until this year when I was watching some trashy teen mom show. I guess my push present for my first was being off the hook cooking Thanksgiving dinner for 5 years because I was in labor for the entire day of it (and he wasn't even born on Thanksgiving! He was born at 2am the next day)
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May 10, 2021 15:59
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My wife orders what she refers to as "butt tea" for new moms we know does this count.
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May 10, 2021 16:00
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We are gonna try something. We even checked before our first when my wife was at a different company and we didn’t this time. Not sure of laws in Texas, will try hospital; we are relatively certain the anesthesia group is different billing from the hospital proper somehow, but I am furious that not everyone caring for her was in-network and no one said a goddamn thing. We are going to fight it either way, by getting the anesthesiology group to decrease and/or the insurance to increase the payout. It’s lovely to just stick someone with a bill. This after the hospital calls our room twice after the birth to settle up an amount we knew we didn’t owe; they didn’t even wait until we went home.
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May 10, 2021 16:34
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life is killing me posted:We are gonna try something. We even checked before our first when my wife was at a different company and we didn’t this time. Not sure of laws in Texas, will try hospital; we are relatively certain the anesthesia group is different billing from the hospital proper somehow, but I am furious that not everyone caring for her was in-network and no one said a goddamn thing. Here's a start, at least: https://www.tdi.texas.gov/tips/texas-protects-consumers-from-surprise-medical-bills.html If the law doesn't help, might be some other resources there to help.
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May 10, 2021 16:47
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life is killing me posted:We are gonna try something. We even checked before our first when my wife was at a different company and we didn’t this time. Not sure of laws in Texas, will try hospital; we are relatively certain the anesthesia group is different billing from the hospital proper somehow, but I am furious that not everyone caring for her was in-network and no one said a goddamn thing. If you have insurance through your employer see if there's an advocate/liason you can bring this to. You tell them the deets, then they go off and fight all this bullshit on your behalf. Insurance bullshit pisses me off so much. So much. Fight every loving step of the way, ask for itemized bills, all that good poo poo. And if you still end up having to pay, send a dollar a month (maximum pettiness). Can't send you to collections because you're making an effort to pay. gently caress. Them.
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May 10, 2021 16:51
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DaveSauce posted:Here's a start, at least: Thanks, we will check out anything that could possibly help! topenga posted:If you have insurance through your employer see if there's an advocate/liason you can bring this to. You tell them the deets, then they go off and fight all this bullshit on your behalf. The problem here is that the anesthesiology group says that our insurance unilaterally decreased their payout and that terminated the relationship so I’m not sure our insurance will help. They are the ones who didn’t wanna pay the people.
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May 10, 2021 16:55
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life is killing me posted:Thanks, we will check out anything that could possibly help! That’s loving wild to me. Like, anesthesiology is part of any surgery…insurance kinda has to cover it. It also would make sense that you’re grandfathered into it if they didn’t do this prior to your wife being pregnant. I dunno/insurance here loving sucks.
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May 10, 2021 16:59
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Even more insurance fun is having twins that get drs visits, procedures (tubes), etc at the exact same time. We’ve had it where one was approved and the other wasn’t, because they see two submissions from the same office on the same day and they think it’s double billing.
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May 10, 2021 16:59
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nwin posted:That’s loving wild to me. Like, anesthesiology is part of any surgery…insurance kinda has to cover it. It also would make sense that you’re grandfathered into it if they didn’t do this prior to your wife being pregnant. Insurance does cover it... IF the provider is in network. Problem is, lots of providers aren't part of the hospital. They're part of some separate business entity that works in the hospital, but not FOR the hospital. So by the end of a given procedure, you get bills not just from the hospital, but potentially any doctor, consultants, even nurses that cared for you, and if any of them are out-of-network then you could be stuck paying full price. No idea how this arrangement came to be, but it's how it works at a lot of places.
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May 10, 2021 17:05
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devmd01 posted:Even more insurance fun is having twins that get drs visits, procedures (tubes), etc at the exact same time. We’ve had it where one was approved and the other wasn’t, because they see two submissions from the same office on the same day and they think it’s double billing. Oh my god that sounds insane. Our kid is almost 5 months old and we’re still getting bills from the birth. We had to go through three rounds of talk to employer, talk to insurance company, talk to hospital to make sure the baby was added to the insurance and billed correctly. And the hospital Pediatrician is billing separately so gotta redo the same steps with them. Always nice to get a $9,000 bill in the mail (directed to a 0 day old baby) because the paperwork hadn’t caught up to their birth and they didn’t have a social security number yet. I think the total cost was close to $100,000, which is insane. What do you do if you don’t have insurance? Just beg for mercy? At the bare minimum you’re going to pay the max on all your deductibles (which we did).
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May 10, 2021 17:07
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devmd01 posted:Even more insurance fun is having twins that get drs visits, procedures (tubes), etc at the exact same time. We’ve had it where one was approved and the other wasn’t, because they see two submissions from the same office on the same day and they think it’s double billing. LOL, literally the first year of our twins we had call insurance half a dozen times to tell them they were twins, and no we didn't get their birthdates entered incorrectly. Like, twins aren't that uncommon, but maybe insurance fraud is more common... idk. I just don't know why they didn't put a note or something on our account after the first couple times.
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May 10, 2021 17:09
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space uncle posted:I think the total cost was close to $100,000, which is insane. What do you do if you don’t have insurance? Just beg for mercy? I used to do social work, and you call the hospital, tell them you're uninsured, and tell them you can't and won't pay that amount. Hospitals want money, and if you're uninsured and poor they won't get any money if they bill uninsured at the same prices they bill to insurance companies. They'll lower the cost, put you on a payment plan, and depending on the hospital, dip into a charitable account the hospital has to help you pay. The hospitals here will always adjust costs for uninsured, and always give a payment plan (unless you have a previous payment plan you didn't pay on), but they only let someone use the charity once.
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May 10, 2021 17:23
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RE: Medical billing - don't forget that most medical places will absolutely negotiate pricing if you can pay in lump sums (and probably otherwise to). I've done this a lot. If I owed $6,000 and had it in the bank... I'd definitely pull the sympathy card (tell them everything going on) and then offer a $3,000 one time cash payment and they'll likely take it or being negotiations. When my dad had a stroke in 2009, I took over his finances and in addition to the hundreds of thousands in medical bills (surprise he had no insurance despite being a former doctor) there was a ton of IRS poo poo (in the almost six figures land) that he had neglected. I had to negotiate with *everyone* and saved probably $200K just pulling the sympathy card and being a hard rear end.
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May 10, 2021 17:23
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I bought a card for my wife. She doesn't like chocolate and the cats eat flowers so I made pancakes for her mother's day breakfast after I got the kids up, and generally was attentive all day. last night after mother's day had ended I remembered that I had forgotten to actually give her the card. I apologised a bunch. She was very happy with it. Dobbs_Head posted:TFW your toddler misses your cornea by the skin of your blink reflex. I didn't have a reflex when my son threw a wood block in my eyes a couple of weeks ago, but, I wear glasses so I was ok.
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May 10, 2021 18:58
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nwin posted:That’s loving wild to me. Like, anesthesiology is part of any surgery…insurance kinda has to cover it. This is actually not the case! I had a pretty extensive sinus surgery a couple years ago. Insurance would not cover an anesthesiologist. They told me I could do it awake or pay $13k out of pocket to get it asleep. It was a several hour surgery and was easily the worst pain of my life and I got 3 Xanax for it.
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May 10, 2021 19:46
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I am so glad I gave birth in Spain. This insurance bullshit is beyond.
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May 10, 2021 19:59
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I had that California insurance so it ended up all paid for. Fully free. Except for the circumcision. That poo poo cost $300. OBGYN came up to our recovery room with her cell phone and card reader dongle to make us pay that before the procedure. Ultimate grift, all the men born before 2005 got their dick snipped as a matter of course and free service. Now, I must pay for my son to experience the same horrific ritual, and I did because I was terrified of the day my son would ask "Hey dad, why is your pee pee different from mine?"
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May 10, 2021 20:00
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My husband is circumcised and my kiddo is not. There has not been any consternation or anything about why their penises look different. He just said one day "Dad's penis is a different than mine because all bodies are different! Nobody's going to look exactly the same as anybody else!"
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May 10, 2021 20:02
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Blessed
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May 10, 2021 20:07
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KirbyKhan posted:I had that California insurance so it ended up all paid for. Fully free. Cost us $600. And it got infected so we had to pay to have it fixed on top of that. I hate insurance, what a scam. But I am glad that all of my recent ills (kids and mine) are all coming while I still have the loving awesome insurance from my old job (Max OOP including deductible is $1500 for me and like an extra $1500 for the kids). My new job's insurance is *shitttttt* - like max OOP with Deductible is $17,000.
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May 10, 2021 20:25
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And just like that-30 minutes of pushing-we’ve got another boy! 8 lb 9 oz which is a far cry from our first who was 5 lb 15 oz.
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May 10, 2021 20:36
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nwin posted:And just like that-30 minutes of pushing-we’ve got another boy! 8 lb 9 oz which is a far cry from our first who was 5 lb 15 oz. Congrats!! Now leave the thread for a while and go be with your family!!
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May 10, 2021 20:39
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Called our insurance and the lady said she showed we owed only $~450 and that there is indeed a limit placed by the state on how much insured pays out. We still need to call them back and she said that if they keep hounding us and insisting we owe almost $7k, they would get involved. We will see. She basically said, “I wouldn’t panic about this,” after we told her we were in panic mode. Hopefully, crisis averted. We’ve also been getting bills from our PCP saying we owe them for things that’ve historically been covered, like physicals and a mental health visit for me. This has happened numerous times and I don’t understand why they keep doing this, it should be evident by now when we see the same NP every single time that they are still in-network and they didn’t suddenly go OON. It’s a pain in the rear end to keep calling them and fighting. God I hope I get a job at Lockheed because I’ve heard good things about the health insurance benefits offered there. UHC is poo poo.
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May 10, 2021 20:41
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We turned a profit on our delivery. Insurance fully covered everything then we got a check for $25 from the hospital as a refund for a copay they thought they charged us but actually never did. Considering that same hospital had recently fired 6-months-pregnant Mrs Pony with zero warning as a Covid cost saving method, we didn't correct their mistake. And congrats nwin!
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May 10, 2021 20:47
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Hell yeah dude! Grats on continuing to perfect the recipe. Med Bill: So we had a med emergency about 2 years before baby. That came out to be $4000 to $7000 dollars depending on how you account for what money left my family unit. I remember pouring through the line by line and seeing a $250,000 somewhere on there and laughed, giggled, absolutely howled. After stringing along with 5% payments we got the monkey off our back. I was willing to stand off harder, I didn't really feel like they were applying credible pressure. Medical Billing is so much more messy and fluid as a contract invoice, so many different parties to the same procedure gets so many conflicting pieces of information. I learned that they smell fear and just make up numbers based off your insurance carrier, reaction, and demographics.
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May 10, 2021 21:27
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life is killing me posted:Called our insurance and the lady said she showed we owed only $~450 and that there is indeed a limit placed by the state on how much insured pays out. We still need to call them back and she said that if they keep hounding us and insisting we owe almost $7k, they would get involved. We will see. She basically said, “I wouldn’t panic about this,” after we told her we were in panic mode. Hopefully, crisis averted. 1: I'm really happy you were able to get someone to tell you WTF. Insurance bullshit makes me so goddamn angry and I hate seeing ANYONE deal with dumb crap like this. 2: OMG UHC WILL BE FIRST AGAINST THE loving WALL WHEN THE REVOLUTION COMES. UHC and loving OptumRx.
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May 10, 2021 22:03
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topenga posted:1: I'm really happy you were able to get someone to tell you WTF. Insurance bullshit makes me so goddamn angry and I hate seeing ANYONE deal with dumb crap like this. Oh God we have optumrx also and Aflac supplementary and it’s all been loving poo poo. We constantly have meds denied. Aflac people are incompetent also, they accidentally cancelled the policy when we were asking them to do something completely different. And yeah, we were sweating hard on that bill. Thank gently caress
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May 10, 2021 22:42
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KirbyKhan posted:Mom didn't like the gift I generally hate advice books, especially relationship advice once, but I encourage you to go read the cliff notes for "the five love languages", should be able to Google it. I think the actual book is about $20 Fun story, my girlfriend at the time just absolutely craved constant praise and compliments for very minor things. Me personally, my opinion, what you do is a combination of effort and natural ability, no praise is required for these things beyond "thank you". So my girlfriend got me the book to read to understand her need for praise. I ended up breaking up with her, using the book as justification, as I knew I'd never meet her praise requirements. It's just not in me Anyways, TL;DR there's roughly 5 broad groups of ways to show love and affection, two of them are giving/receiving gifts, another is quality time There's a tiny chance that minor holidays allow your SO to capitalize on these two love languages. That doesn't solve your problem, but maybe it'll help you understand that stuff better
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May 10, 2021 23:15
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killer crane posted:LOL, literally the first year of our twins we had call insurance half a dozen times to tell them they were twins, and no we didn't get their birthdates entered incorrectly. Like, twins aren't that uncommon, but maybe insurance fraud is more common... idk. I just don't know why they didn't put a note or something on our account after the first couple times. Our kid was born during open enrollment, which is about.... Slightly more than one in 12 children born every year. Took about 90 days of phone calls before they accepted that our child was born and we (adults) weren't trying to scam them out of infant hospital services
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May 10, 2021 23:30
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