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Strong Female
Jul 27, 2010

I don't think you've been paying attention


Note: You can post wonderful/ridiculous/hilarious game mods in here that aren't completely awful just so we don't lose our minds looking at cat dongs all day.

Game mods can be wonderful things. They can be tiny, like an improved texture for a sword, but they can also be massive, like an entirely new game built on the engine of the original game.

Some mods like Counter-Strike, Red Orchestra, Team Fortress, and DOTA have actually opened up entire new genres and actual careers for the mod-makers! That's really awesome in a lot of ways!

However, not all mods are so good as to bring such joy to the world. Some mods are bad. Some mods are really bad. Some mods are weird as poo poo. Some mods are outright terrifying and make you really wish for better mental health care infrastructure.

These are the sort of mods this thread is dedicated to simultaneously appreciating and denigrating.

Once you look at enough of these mods, you'll see some threads of commonality: surprise sex, uncanny valley, beastiality, anime on everything, boobies on everything, dongs on everything, torture, a profound lack of comprehensive sex education, incorporating cartoon ponies on everything, etc

These mods disproportionately tend to congregate in the Nexus Mods network (mostly because the network is really popular and also allows modders to post all their weird poo poo too). The original thread was the Skyrim Nexus Appreciation thread, but this thread has an expanded scope so you can post whatever bad mod for whatever game from wherever you want.

Anyway, enough writing on my part. I'll gently start us off with a Skyrim mod from the last page of the Skyrim Nexus Appreciation thread that actually doesn't have dongs or ponies in it (and the weird part? it's from Japan!). However, it will still haunt my dreams:







http://dragonporn.ldblog.jp/archives/6639902.html

Strong Female fucked around with this message at Jun 10, 2013 around 21:05

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Strong Female
Jul 27, 2010

I don't think you've been paying attention


This thread will also cover the awful people who make these awful game mods. For a depressing example of just how awful modders can be, check out this wonderful synopsis of "Gategate" by Upmarket Mango:

What is Gategate?

There's a popular mod for Skyrim called Open Cities that is made by a modder called Arthmoor. Open Cities gets rid of the loading screen between the game world and each of the major cities by transferring the cities to the main game world, allowing for a seamless transition between city and wilderness. Towards the end of June, Arthmoor released an updated version of Open Cities that added standing Oblivion gates to each of the major cities. These gates stand out because they're large and are placed in the middle of each city. They also look like poo poo and have terrible textures. They don't even make sense from a lore perspective.

A lot of people didn't like this and wanted Arthmoor to remove the gates or at least make them optional but he refused, saying he wouldn't compromise his "artistic vision". This led to lots of arguing and bitching between people who didn't want the gates forced upon them (everyone), and a group of "veteran modders" (including Arthmoor) and their associated entourage of supporters. These supporters very often stated how thankful we should be that these talented demi-gods, with their vast, arcane knowledge on modding, would even bless us with an ounce of their talent, and without them the entire community around these games would fall apart and die because literally nobody else can do what they do (no, really, people were actually saying this).

Goon Upmarket Mango took Arthmoor's mod, removed the Oblivion gates, and put it up for download on the Steam Workshop with full credit and praise to Arthmoor.

Arthmoor flipped the gently caress out.

He railed against what he called a "stolen mod" and called Upmarket Mango a thief and a liar who was in on a conspiracy to drive him away from modding and Destroy Modding Forever. He also called Something Awful a warez site and a den of pirates and thieves. He went on to caused a lot of noise on the Bethesda forums, and after a few days Upmarket Mango's version was banned from the Workshop.

After that, goon Ardeus released a patch for Open Cities that removed the Oblivion gates. This patch required Arthmoor's Open Cities and in fact wouldn't even do anything without it. Additionally, the patch used absolutely no resources from Open Cities. It is a completely independent, third-party mod. Everybody is happy, right? Not quite.

Arthmoor went on the offensive, saying our (modding) days were over, that he's going to sue Something Awful, and that we better watch ourselves because THE GUILD will be coming after us. There was lots and lots and lots of internet-lawyering to be had and eventually both Ardeus and Arthmoor got in contact with Peter Hines, a community manager for loving vice president of Bethesda, who ended up siding with Ardeus on the issue. Arthmoor was obviously not happy with this and it seemed like he was going to implode at any moment. On the Bethesda forums (and other places) he was going on and on about what a dangerous precedent Bethesda had set by siding with Ardeus and how we damned goons ruined the community. He painted a dangerous world (using lots of sensationalist language) where mod pirates delivered precise and tactical strikes against people using virus-ladden mod bombs, and the esteemed modding community would be gripped in a cold war where both sides stockpiled these virus-mod-bombs until eventually it all blew up and we'd all die or something.

Arthmoor didn't implode like we'd all though he would and eventually things calmed down and Arthmoor even "authorized" an Official Gate Removal Patch to be made by one of his supporters with the warning that he will not be supporting it and that people should only use this authorized patch because other, unauthorized patches are in fact likely to break your game.

Throughout the whole episode, Arthmoor often stated that his Oblivion gates were in fact lore-friendly, adding that Bethesda only programmed, modeled, and animated the gates crumbling into pieces after being closed because... I don't know, who cares? Arthmoor's word is law and even Bethesda is subject to it. He even wrote an incredibly spergy rant about how Bethesda is wrong about their own game:

Arthmoor posted:

Why are there dead Oblivion gates in the cities now?

While the gates in TES4 were shown to collapse into their debris piles, the only known reason for why the physical parts vanished is because that's just how the animation was done. All gates used the same resource file so they all collapse the same way. Further, the gates that you as the player close down are done via removal of the sigil stone power source. So when those close, they're doing so under a controlled set of conditions and the physical portal withdraws as per whatever designed system the Daedra use for that.

When Martin pulls the Akatosh avatar bit at the end of TES4, whatever gates were standing open would have had their dimensional bridge abruptly severed, and I believe that would result in the physical manifestation remaining behind since it was NOT properly shut down. The end result of this should logically have been a series of gates still standing but with no portal. This was limited by how the scripting works to call their shutdown code though. All it did was instruct every gate to run the reverse animation. The code was also supposed to have caused all the debris everywhere to vanish as well but that doesn't happen, nobody reported it as a bug, and Bethesda didn't care enough to fix it.

So there ought to be various gates all over Tamriel that were left intact, including gates within cities. 200 years isn't long enough for solid stone to crumble into nothing. It is long enough for those gates which aren't being marginally maintained by those near them to become overgrown, cracked, damaged by weather, wars, etc. Could be up for debate as to weather the Nords would leave them sitting around like this or not, but there's nothing in the lore that says these couldn't simply have been left there as monuments to the Crisis.

Even here on Earth we build monuments to incredibly painful events in our history - like the WWII memorial at Pearl Harbor where they left the sunken ships in the harbor and turned it into a national monument. The statue representing the Battle of Iwo Jima. Whole museums dedicated to WWII history, and other wars fought as well. Battlefield memorials for the Civil War are everywhere. People even reenact these battles on a regular basis.

Arguments of it being feature creep don't fly either. No more so than a smelter in Riften where none exists, or gatesmen who open the gates for you if you're on horseback. These gates add a touch of uniqueness to the mod, and pay what I believe is an homage to TES4:Oblivion as one of the best games of its time. They are not active portals and nor are they eyesores. They're not even in your way.

Still not happy? Thomas Kaira has created a patch to remove the gates. Keep in mind that use of this patch is unsupported by me. Any problems arising from using it will be ignored. His is the only authorized patch, any others have been produced without permission and are likely to have game killing bugs in them. Any mention of an unauthorized version will be reported.

Oh, and uploading any other Open City mod, whether you made it yourself or not, will probably get you banned on the Nexus now. Hooray for hugboxes!

MMF Freeway
Sep 15, 2010

Later!



Umm actually this guy is cool.

Brainamp
Sep 4, 2011

More Zen than Zenyatta



voltron lion force posted:

Umm actually this guy is cool.

I think it was said that nobody likes him in the place he is mascot of. Aslo giant heads are creepy.

Strong Female
Jul 27, 2010

I don't think you've been paying attention


Brainamp posted:

I think it was said that nobody likes him in the place he is mascot of. Aslo giant heads are creepy.



Just look at this scene.

Yodzilla
Apr 29, 2005

Now who looks even dumber?

Beef Witch


I know, her dress is so last season and that hair is a disaster!

MMF Freeway
Sep 15, 2010

Later!


Can't stop laughing at the 2nd pic.

Cream-of-Plenty
Apr 21, 2010


Strong Female posted:



Just look at this scene.

It's not nearly as funny until you start thinking that this screenshot might not have been intended to be funny.

TheSpiritFox
Jan 4, 2009

I'm just a memory, I can't give you any new information.



I look forward to many more escapades into the dank pits that video game modding has to offer.

NihilVerumNisiMors
Aug 16, 2012


Can't wait to see what a concentrated effort might bring to light, terribleness-wise.

I was going to post about a Shogun 2 texture mod that was released shortly after the game was out. The maker basically just opened the 16 bit texture files and re-saved them at 24 or 32 bit, claiming it would somehow magically improve the textures in the game. Then people started pointing out that just upping the bit rate doesn't do a loving thing. As can be expected of places like Total War Center, a greater number of people, including the maker himself, staunchly defended the mod, claiming "they" were able to "see" a difference nonetheless.

Sadly, the thread doesn't seem to exist anymore.

C-Euro
Mar 20, 2010



Soiled Meat


This is now canon in my eyes.

(I'm sorry, I wish I had more to contribute but I don't really seek out terrible mods, even if it would just be for cheap laughs. I know the Elder Scrolls game are a goldmine for them though. Maybe Maxwell Adams' LP of Oblivion would be a good place to look?)

C-Euro fucked around with this message at Oct 30, 2012 around 03:43

Strong Female
Jul 27, 2010

I don't think you've been paying attention


TheSpiritFox posted:

I look forward to many more escapades into the dank pits that video game modding has to offer.

How about the...EVIL LAIR OF HYDRA - PLAYER HOME WITH SEXY GIRLS

http://skyrim.nexusmods.com/mods/12556

The barely broken English just makes it even better:

quote:

Want to see some eye-candies back home between your adventures?
Have many skimpy armor mods but hate the wooden mannequins?
Enjoy watching hot cat-fights in arena, or fight them youself?
You have found the perfect mod for all these and more!

Don't worry! It gets better:

quote:

Optional dungeon to imprison, torture and execute victims



This is the stuff that should get you put on some sort of FBI list

Strong Female fucked around with this message at Oct 30, 2012 around 03:46

Naky
May 30, 2001

Resident Crackhead

You haven't seen awful game mods until you've swung by loverslab for Gamebryo engine games.

Shumagorath
Jun 5, 2001


Strong Female posted:

This is the stuff that should get you put on some sort of FBI list
If the FBI isn't sending weekly IP/e-mail requests to Nexus they're missing out on a lot of future child molesters or worse.

Cantorsdust
Aug 9, 2008

Infinitely many points, but zero length.

Top Cop

You may want to recheck your image link, it got placed as a timg instead of an actual link.

Strong Female
Jul 27, 2010

I don't think you've been paying attention


Cantorsdust posted:

You may want to recheck your image link, it got placed as a timg instead of an actual link.

The one for the Evil Lair of Hydra thing? I kept it a timg because I'm not sure what the main forum policies are on NWS/NMS content.

Cream-of-Plenty
Apr 21, 2010


Naky posted:

You haven't seen awful game mods until you've swung by loverslab for Gamebryo engine games.

You beat me to it, but only because I was giving a salty taste of the things Loverslab had to offer.

Query: What do you get when you take Fallout + Sex?
Sexout, a comprehensive STD/Pregnancy/surprise sex/BDSM/Sex mod. Complete with:

Blessings!

quote:

I began receiving annoying informative messages that my toon had become pregnant eight in a row at all sorts of times, including the middle of combat. I was looking forward to them finally stopping when the pregnancy was over; but, even though the toon is no longer pregnant, the harassing messages continue.

Perks!

quote:

Victim tracks how many times u get raped and gives you some small bonuses per 50 times.

Immersion!

quote:

You can make douches at campfires if you have any kind of soda in your inventory. And if you can't find them anywhere else, the medic in Sexout Store usually has at least 1 std treatment available.

...but no fisting?

quote:

no fisting?
after playing for a while with Sexout and mods, i suddenly realized what i never seen any kind of fisting in any of the Sexout plugins, is it intentional or just no animation for it? or i simply missed it?

Yodzilla
Apr 29, 2005

Now who looks even dumber?

Beef Witch


Fisting should open up someone's Super Secret Inventory.

Eldoop
Jul 29, 2012

Cheeky? Us?
Why, I never!


Douching with soda sounds like the worst loving idea.

Strong Female
Jul 27, 2010

I don't think you've been paying attention


Eldoop posted:

Douching with soda sounds like the worst loving idea.

Only if you don't have a vagina or haven't been near one since being born

BigRed0427
Mar 22, 2007

There's no one I'd rather be than me.


So wait...You get raped during combat or...how does that work?

OldTennisCourt
Sep 11, 2011


BigRed0427 posted:

So wait...You get raped during combat or...how does that work?

Only nightmares lie on the path this question leads.

Upmarket Mango
May 21, 2011

HI DUDES, WHERE'S THE DESPERATE SITUATION?


There's even beastiality... I'm fairly certain I even saw a thread on Loverslab once asking about the possibility of implementing human/animal hybrid offspring as a result of surprise sex.

Ape Has Killed Ape
Sep 15, 2005

M'caque


Strong Female posted:

Only if you don't have a vagina or haven't been near one since being born

I'd be willing to go one further and say that these people were born via Cesarian section.

OMGVBFLOL
Dec 20, 2003


BigRed0427 posted:

So wait...You get raped during combat or...how does that work?

edit: Nevermind. If you want to go down the rabbit hole, you'll do so under your own power.

Underwhelmed
Mar 7, 2004



Nap Ghost

Upmarket Mango posted:

There's even beastiality... I'm fairly certain I even saw a thread on Loverslab once asking about the possibility of implementing human/animal hybrid offspring as a result of surprise sex.

Someone posted a list of patch notes for one of these mods in some nexus associated thread at some point. One of the notes was something on the order of: "horses are now less likely to mount everything unprovoked due to a bug in their AI".

Some people have seriously hosed up power fantasies.

Upmarket Mango
May 21, 2011

HI DUDES, WHERE'S THE DESPERATE SITUATION?


THE PUNISHED: VIRGIN BLOOD 2 (click for images)

The modder posted:

Comes in three flavors:
-Deflowered#1
-Deflowered#2
-Menstruation

I wonder why the lovers developers never made this? So i made it anyway. Now please hit THANKS button if you use it. This makes a good loving screenshoot on every lovers actions. Anyway, Enjoy!!

CREDIT.WOLFZQ
LOCATIONS: BRAVIL Mage Guild 2nd floor. Inside small Cask, Beside the bed - Under the shelf.
Occupy: Ring Slot (Gloves that hide rings, hides the mesh from showing) - Lower body slot (greaves slot)

I gotta say, the lack of vaginal bleeding in Oblivion was a serious oversight on Bethesda's part. Luckily this modder's got us covered.

Ape Has Killed Ape posted:

I'd be willing to go one further and say that these people were born via Cesarian section.

Hahah, nice.

Haruharuharuko
Mar 24, 2008

Yeah I lied; so what is the truth?



Sexout Plugin is probably my favorite phrase I've heard in a while.

Upmarket Mango
May 21, 2011

HI DUDES, WHERE'S THE DESPERATE SITUATION?


"Sexout" would be a good title for an Electric Six song.

Sankis
Mar 8, 2004

But I remember the fella who told me. Big lad. Arms as thick as oak trees, a stunning collection of scars, nice eye patch. A REAL therapist he was. Er wait. Maybe it was rapist?



NihilVerumNisiMors posted:

Can't wait to see what a concentrated effort might bring to light, terribleness-wise.

I was going to post about a Shogun 2 texture mod that was released shortly after the game was out. The maker basically just opened the 16 bit texture files and re-saved them at 24 or 32 bit, claiming it would somehow magically improve the textures in the game. Then people started pointing out that just upping the bit rate doesn't do a loving thing. As can be expected of places like Total War Center, a greater number of people, including the maker himself, staunchly defended the mod, claiming "they" were able to "see" a difference nonetheless.

Sadly, the thread doesn't seem to exist anymore.

This happened with Dragon Age: Origins, too, except in that case it was just the author using the "sharpen" tool on every single texture and claiming it was now HD . It looks awful.

Does anyone have pictures of the Oblivion gates mentioned in the Gategate post? All of my googling simply shows me what I assume are pre-oblivion gate screenshots of the mod. I want to see what all the fuss is about.

I hate how every good mod for every game has to have this happen to them. Someone will do something really cool and then decide that their cool visual mod also needs to fit their vision of what the game will be so here are a bunch of game changes or new NPCs. Ugh. It's especially bad with the Bethesda games since you can make your mods so modular in design. Just that no one ever does.

Argas
Jan 13, 2008
SRW Fanatic

Sankis posted:

I hate how every good mod for every game has to have this happen to them. Someone will do something really cool and then decide that their cool visual mod also needs to fit their vision of what the game will be so here are a bunch of game changes or new NPCs. Ugh. It's especially bad with the Bethesda games since you can make your mods so modular in design. Just that no one ever does.

Wouldn't want to compromise that artistic vision.

It's been compared to defacing famous works of art, as if changing a mod's code is equivalent to painting over the Mona Lisa. Computer code is like real life after all.

Strong Female
Jul 27, 2010

I don't think you've been paying attention


Argas posted:

Wouldn't want to compromise that artistic vision.

It's been compared to defacing famous works of art, as if changing a mod's code is equivalent to painting over the Mona Lisa. Computer code is like real life after all.

Now that you mention it, a lot of the initial Skyrim texture overhauls were basically the digital version of this:

Cerevisiae
Jul 19, 2009

I'll protect you, Mayor!


Sankis posted:

Does anyone have pictures of the Oblivion gates mentioned in the Gategate post? All of my googling simply shows me what I assume are pre-oblivion gate screenshots of the mod. I want to see what all the fuss is about.

They have since been changed to look like:


But at the height of Gategate they appeared more like:

Cerevisiae fucked around with this message at Oct 30, 2012 around 04:56

TacticianMagician
Aug 19, 2009

I claimed this title entirely by lurking around and not having a life. Woo!

Those gates just look annoying and in the way, even with the proper textures. I can totally see how people would get pissed off. I only play stuff on consoles so I usually miss out on all the mod stuff, the last cool thing I remember was building towers and such in morrowind. Looks like things got a lot grosser since!

edit: maybe I'm just used to vanilla skyrim but they stick right the gently caress out

TOOT BOOT
May 25, 2010



Grimey Drawer

How did I know this thread would prominently feature mods from the Nexus?

Typical Pubbie
May 10, 2011


ten dollar bitcoin posted:

How did I know this thread would prominently feature mods from the Nexus?

How couldn't it?



http://newvegas.nexusmods.com/mods/46128

Typical Pubbie fucked around with this message at Oct 30, 2012 around 06:38

Gonkish
May 19, 2004



Ah, loverslab. You never fail to disappoint.

Argas
Jan 13, 2008
SRW Fanatic

Strong Female posted:

Now that you mention it, a lot of the initial Skyrim texture overhauls were basically the digital version of this:



Nah, it's clearly exactly the same.

It's hilarious how much people act as if digital art is exactly the same as physical art. I can understand being irked by someone doing something to something you created but the original is untouched.

The hilarious arguments over whether or not the Skyrim modding tools ToS meant the mod owners didn't have full control over their work was amusing. Last I checked, Blizzard doesn't allow people to monetize stuff created with their editors or act as if they're some kind of sanctified work of art.

Strong Female
Jul 27, 2010

I don't think you've been paying attention



Is that someone (something?) from Star Fox? I didn't know they had girl animals

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Ape Has Killed Ape
Sep 15, 2005

M'caque


Strong Female posted:

Is that someone (something?) from Star Fox? I didn't know they had girl animals

I envy you.

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