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My advice to you as a new writer is to drop the gimmicks and try writing a straight story until you can pull it off, because this is just a bunch of newspaper snippets about a fire and nobody is seriously going to sit down and analyze your subtext in their free time. Your English is okay and you seem to proofread your stuff so I guess you could try a week of Thunderdome and see how it goes.
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Jul 18, 2014 22:56
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ScottyWired posted:Do I also spell colour, neighbour and clamour incorrectly? What about centre and fibre? Yes, all of those are wrong.
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Sep 12, 2014 17:41
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There is a similar twist in The Sixth Sense. I'm going to hide it in spoiler tags, because not everyone has seen it: M. Night Shyamalan is actually a bad writer. What it does better than you was to make the story about something else (the boy's visions, the therapist's attempt to help him). Imagine if the Sixth Sense was just Bruce Willis and Haley Joel Osment sitting around watching terrible movies and then it goes PSYCHE, M. Night Shyamalan actually sucks. Would you stick around? No, of course you wouldn't. If you wanted to see somebody watch terrible movies you'd watch your own reflection during an M. Night Shyamalan marathon. But you don't because that's boring. Don't be boring. Instead, why not write an interesting story? I'll start you off with a good idea: there's a man, and his flatmate is a ghost girl. One of them wants something, but they can't have it. You can take it from here.
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Sep 16, 2015 23:09
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