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# ? May 1, 2013 22:47 |
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# ? Sep 9, 2024 18:15 |
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Winner Announcement This weeks winner(s) and the judges for the next week are: Nubile Hillock, Nikaer Drekin, and Fumblemouse. All of you had impressive submissions blablabla. Yes, that's right, all three of you are winners and all three of you have to judge. I hope you hate it just as much as I did. Ultralosers: The cats. Try again next week. I still suspect you are both the same person... registering on the same day just two months apart. angel opportunity fucked around with this message at 23:12 on May 1, 2013 |
# ? May 1, 2013 23:05 |
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The kat people. Both losers.
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# ? May 1, 2013 23:07 |
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Martello posted:The kat people. Both losers. Hahahahaha. At least they don't have to judge next week. systran posted:Ultralosers: The cats. Try again next week. I still suspect you are both the same person... registering on the same day just two months apart. It's a catspiracy Erik Shawn-Bohner fucked around with this message at 23:16 on May 1, 2013 |
# ? May 1, 2013 23:14 |
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Well, thank you for this... dubious honor, judges. I guess my Boris Grishenko-style invincibility will be unchallenged for another day. I don't have PM, so if my fellow judges want to get in touch, my email is nikaerd at gmail.
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# ? May 1, 2013 23:43 |
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Hey Sebmojo I'm still all dressed up with no blood spatters to show. You owe these people a spectacle. FOR THUNDERDOME SUPERIORITY. Congrats winners(?), welcome to hell
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# ? May 2, 2013 02:56 |
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systran posted:Winner Announcement Haha no, not really. Though I know kazakiri IRL. He introduced me to the joys of SA. He was spending so much time lurking here that even I get jealous. I'll be joining depending on how soon the prompt gets out. zakucat fucked around with this message at 03:59 on May 2, 2013 |
# ? May 2, 2013 03:57 |
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First the that girl told me "we should just be friends" gets arrested in a big RCMP thing, and now I've won the Thunderdome! What a glorious day Prompt will be up shortly, I think. edit in case anyone wants to call my bluff edit2: The three worst contestants along with the three best contestants shall get a line by line! autism ZX spectrum fucked around with this message at 04:26 on May 2, 2013 |
# ? May 2, 2013 04:11 |
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PROMPT As my fellow judges and I were each robbed of a victory to call our own we're bitter. We wanted the glory, not the soggy mouth ashes of a 'shared victory'. So we're going to have to exert our innate superiority over you in a different way. Your basic prompt is to write a genre piece involving Bad Luck, because gently caress the last judges. Each entry must be submitted to an imaginary Pulp Genre Magazine which you get to invent. You know the kind; Weird Tales, Amazing Stories, True Zombie Romance, whatever, go wild. Don't get too excited, though, this is the rope by which we fully expect you to hang yourselves. The judges are the Editors of your magazine. If you're submitting to Two-Fisted Tales of Terror a one fisted tale of mild unease, you will be rejected with extreme prejudice. The same with True Zombie Slight Crushes - we want to be amazed and astounded but we've got a stonking great circumstantial hate-on for everything, so it better be loving amazingly astounding. You will be graded on how far down in the Slush Pile your entry ends up, if you're good enough to make it to the slush pile. Include the name of your Pulp Magazine when you sign up. Otherwise you'll just look at your story and go "This is my submission for 'Crap Emo Bollocks'." Yes, you would. Oh, and the stories have to deal with anarcho-syndicalism or straight up libertarianism. We don't care how, just so long as it's there. WordCount: 1200 + Magazine Title Signups By Midnight Friday PST Submission by Midnight Sunday PST Judges: Nubile Hillock, Nikaer Drekin, and Fumblemouse --- The unwashed masses, barely literate, yearning to be pro and the publishing empires to which they have attached their hopes and dreams: HaitianDivorce: Firestar Science Fiction Auraboks: Testosterone Tales Erogenous Beef: Brosef Stalin's Yankee Yarns V for Vegas: Arm Wrasslin' - True Tales of Bicep Bravery Radioactive Bears: Romancin' & Wranglin' Systran: Enduring Atlas: Tantalizing Tales of Space Bootstraps and the Magnificent Men who Pull People (and sometimes Aliens) up by Them. JonasSalk: Fantastic Fantasy: Where the Fantasy is Fantastic. crabrock: Animals of Tomorrow Cancercakes: SciFi Spy Bi-weekly. Kaishai: Eldritch Tales of the Uncanny Perpetulance: Galt's Gilded Tales. Sitting Here: Tales for the Modern Misanthropist. Cpt. Mahatma Gandhi: Tinseltown Terrors: Grim Tales of Hollywood Sebmojo: Flabbergasting Science Wonder Yarns! magnificent7: Astonishing Creeps Symptomless Coma: Time Travellin' Weekly! Dr. Kloctopussy: Spaced! Outrageous Stories from Outerspace!! Black Griffon: Four Balls: Treacherous Tales of Steampunk Adventures. Echo Cian: Phantasmagorical Fantasy Fantasia Weekly. Fumblemouse fucked around with this message at 07:41 on May 4, 2013 |
# ? May 2, 2013 05:13 |
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Nubile Hillock posted:edit2: The three worst contestants along with the three best contestants shall get a line by line! Yeah, creepy glee aside is this two line-by-lines from each of you or is this something you're doing all by yourself? E: oh, yeah, I'm in I guess. E2: Off to a great start ! Let's send this one in to Firestar Science Fiction. HaitianDivorce fucked around with this message at 15:17 on May 2, 2013 |
# ? May 2, 2013 05:16 |
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No idea! I'm doing line by lines for sure, the other judges can do whatever the hell they want!
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# ? May 2, 2013 05:21 |
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Nubile Hillock posted:No idea! I'm doing line by lines for sure, the other judges can do whatever the hell they want! Cool. I'll... try to make sure I'm not on the bottom, I guess.
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# ? May 2, 2013 05:24 |
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HaitianDivorce posted:E: oh, yeah, I'm in I guess. I have bolded a certain section of prompt. Reading Submission Instructions is vital for sending stories to magazines and so is not forgetting to write the address on the loving envelope.
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# ? May 2, 2013 06:06 |
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HaitianDivorce posted:
Shitkittens. By "name" we meant "invent a name for“, not "point at". Feel free to submit to the magazine of your choice on your own time, but for our purposes it would be hard to judge if you were sufficiently Clarkey or worldy. I have edited the prompt for clarity.
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# ? May 2, 2013 07:11 |
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In. Writing for Testosterone Tales.
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# ? May 2, 2013 08:00 |
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Tentatively in, pending actually having time this weekend. I'll be writing for Brosef Stalin's Yankee Yarns. Founded in 1981 after the Kent State Revolution by an alcoholic Turk with money from the Moldovan Mafia as a midwestern Gosizdata firm, tragedy struck BSYY after its editorial board were discovered dead beneath an avalanche of Ayn Rand fanfiction in '92. Sold to the lowest bidder, the mag was "reinvented" by the world-famous fanzine authors the Hoopblatt brothers, fraternal Siamese twins from Rolla, MN with a penchant for Wild Turkey and shooting competing editors in the buttocks. The current editor-in-chief is Happy Boy, a badger with heart arrhythmia, who has guided the rag to dominance in the field of hard-boiled post-bropocalyptic action.
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# ? May 2, 2013 10:02 |
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# ? May 2, 2013 10:35 |
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I'm in, writing for Romancin' & Wranglin'
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# ? May 2, 2013 13:14 |
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In. Submitting to Enduring Atlas: Tantalizing Tales of Space Bootstraps and the Magnificent Men who Pull People (and Sometimes Aliens) up by Them.
angel opportunity fucked around with this message at 23:16 on May 2, 2013 |
# ? May 2, 2013 14:40 |
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I'm in. Writing for Fantastic Fantasy: Where the Fantasy is Fantastic.
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# ? May 2, 2013 14:46 |
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Fumblemouse posted:Oh, and the stories have to deal with anarcho-syndicalism or straight up libertarianism. We don't care how, just so long as it's there. Correction: I write as well as I research.
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# ? May 2, 2013 15:36 |
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Submitting my entry to Animals of Tomorrow!.
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# ? May 2, 2013 16:04 |
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magnificent7 posted:What the goddamn loving christ? Just flick through this: http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3543334 In for this week, submitting to SciFi Spy Bi-weekly.
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# ? May 2, 2013 16:18 |
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While we're on the subject of magazines, have the other people who got accepted by the Thunderdome mag been paid yet? Because I haven't and "Mid April" is starting to ring a little hollow.
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# ? May 2, 2013 17:15 |
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In, submitting to Eldritch Tales of the Uncanny.
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# ? May 2, 2013 17:34 |
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Submitting to Galt's Gilded Tales.
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# ? May 2, 2013 17:44 |
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Hopefully this time I'll get accepted to Tales for the Modern Misanthropist. I'm in since Sebmojo is the worst nemesis ever.
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# ? May 2, 2013 19:33 |
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Gonna give this a shot. Hopefully Tinseltown Terrors: Grim Tales of Hollywood enjoys my entry!
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# ? May 2, 2013 20:04 |
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Sitting Here posted:Hopefully this time I'll get accepted to Tales for the Modern Misanthropist. HA! I will literally physically destroy you with my submission to Flabbergasting Science Wonder Yarns!.
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# ? May 2, 2013 20:42 |
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sebmojo posted:HA! I'll face you down in-prompt of course But I want something ~special~
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# ? May 2, 2013 20:59 |
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In with a submission to Astonishing Creeps!
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# ? May 2, 2013 22:37 |
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In with a submission to that classic biannual journal, Time Travellin' Weekly!
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# ? May 2, 2013 22:46 |
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The frontpage just mentioned a published work that has beaten all of you already.
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# ? May 3, 2013 04:52 |
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IF KAISHAI AND ECHOCIAN DO NOT SIGN UP THEY WILL FOREVER BE KNOWN AS TEAM SMELLS-A-BUNCH
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# ? May 3, 2013 22:36 |
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Kaishai posted:In, submitting to Eldritch Tales of the Uncanny. Nubile Hillock posted:IF KAISHAI AND ECHOCIAN DO NOT SIGN UP THEY WILL FOREVER BE KNOWN AS TEAM SMELLS-A-BUNCH IF HILLOCK DOESN'T LEARN TO READ, I WILL SIC LEVAR BURTON ON HIM.
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# ? May 3, 2013 22:56 |
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SurreptitiousMuffin posted:While we're on the subject of magazines, have the other people who got accepted by the Thunderdome mag been paid yet? Because I haven't and "Mid April" is starting to ring a little hollow. I don't expect to see money from this, ever. Also, in with my submission to Spaced! Outrageous Stories from Outerspace!!
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# ? May 3, 2013 23:00 |
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Thunderduel: Martello v ESB The Boy and the Crib Frankie was locked in the corncrib because he was a bad boy. He had done a very naughty thing, and his father said he wasn’t fit to live in the house until he learned to act like a big boy. The sun had gone down, and the crickets were singing. The lock on the door rattled. Frankie rose to his feet and bounced with joy as his father unlatched the chain. His daddy had a bandage around his neck, a dark spot along the left-hand side below his beard. Frankie’s dad set a plate down. It was stacked with cornbread, a pile of sugary beans, and a great big porkchop that edged off the side of the plate. “Daddy,” Frankie said, “I’ve learned my lesson, and I want to come back inside.” Frankie’s father shook his head as he walked backwards out the door, “Not yet, son. Not yet.” Cradled in the dry husks in the corner, Frankie sopped up the sweet bean juice with the cornbread and relished the flavor. “I’m so hungry,” came a sweet voice from the pig pen, “Will you share with me, Frankie?” Frankie crawled back into the corner and hid in the husks. “Frankie. I know why you’re in there,” she snorted, “You didn’t stick him well enough, you naughty boy!” “Go away!” Frankie shoved his plate under the rough wooden wall into the pig pen, “Take it and leave me alone!” The greedy, sloppy gnawing and grunting made his tummy hurt. “I always loved them porkchops.” She nudged the plate back into the corncrib. “Thank you my darling,” the piggie said, “I’ll let you out since your evil daddy won’t.” The husks rattled and rasped as Frankie quivered behind them. Tears dripped down his cheeks, and he laid his head against the corner. The sow butted her head against the wall, punctuated by Frankie’s screams of fright. The old hickory crackled as it bent inward. Frankie thought the whole corncrib would come down around him the way it shook and shimmied. It creaked until the sow had busted through, her fat pied head sticking in. “Come on boy,” she said, “come on out and do what you have to do.” Frankie smudged the dirt on his face and crawled through the hole into the pig pen. The rest of them were asleep except for the old sow. She butted him towards the gate, “Climb over.” He did as he was told, stretching high and climbing up and over, landing flat on his back on the other side. Frankie stood and walked to the house. He passed the corn crib with the chain and lock, the grave where he stopped and said, “Goodnight momma.” He picked up the pocket knife his father used to whittle on the porch, now gone rusty from the year of sun and rain. Frankie entered his father’s bedroom, the knife in hand, “Daddy.” His daddy woke to a terrible fright. Frankie’s daddy cried. # In the morning, Frankie and his daddy went down to the pig pen. His daddy’s hand had a cotton wrap with a big red spot in it. Frankie dragged a large, two-headed axe with him, fresh sharpened edges glinting in the morning light. His father took him to a stump where the old sow was tied down, her neck stretched over. Frankie spread his feet apart and lifted the heavy axe over his shoulder, back taught and ready to swing. “Do it, boy,” his father said. The old sow craned her neck up and looked the boy in the eye, “I never loved you anyway.”
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# ? May 4, 2013 00:39 |
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Thunderduel Prompt: Operation Circlejerk: Martello vs Sebmojo Aight, boys. We almost have all the hands in the right places, so we can't break the chain. Aim for the cracker in the center, last one to finish has to eat it. Prompt: In <1000 words, write a flash story that covers a specific point in time of about two minutes. It must pose a philosophical question that is exemplified by the story.
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# ? May 4, 2013 00:50 |
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SIGNUPS CLOSE IN LESS THAN FOUR HOURS Most of you guys signed up Thursday, but just a heads-up for any stragglers.
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# ? May 4, 2013 04:21 |
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# ? Sep 9, 2024 18:15 |
Signing up. Writing a story for Four Balls: Treacherous Tales of Steampunk Adventures. Also, judgment for the brawl is coming in eight hours or so. Just got a new job, so it's been a busy couple of days.
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# ? May 4, 2013 05:24 |