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Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

horriblePencilist posted:

Lastly, how does Amusement Park Between work? I assumed it was a parallel world, but this chapter makes it sound like it's a single island like Azeroth. Where is that island? On another planet? Somewhere hidden in the pacific?

It was easily missed, but it looks like that when it is 11 PM in APB, it's 11 AM in the real world. And later this rule becomes mindboggingly stupid because of the situation at hand. I'm not going to spoil it further.

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Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

Bobbin Threadbare posted:

Detective Richard Black will return

Please be true :ohdear:

Bobbin, you might be sick of hearing this over and over again, but I love this story of yours. I never thought that Twisted! could inspire such a thing. What you've written is a thing of beauty and it is leagues better than what Joseph Wong is going through. Even if it is just a polished turd, it has been polished to the point where one can be fooled into that it isn't a turd at all.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

JosephWongKS posted:

What the hell is a “scream machine”?



http://railrunnermiranda.deviantart.com/art/Scream-Machine-304571927

quote:

What happened to the magical racist guard spiders?

Thunderbark obviously went out hunting and so he was not in range of the spider's protective radius, duh.

quote:

“Hello Bones, would you like to meet Thunderbark and - Ra–lrunner [sic]?” she hissed.

Holy crap was that actually in the book itself? The printed version? How do you miss that?!

quote:

What hints?

quote:

“Lets [sic] use him as bait for the red herring!” she laughed. “I’ll deal with him later. Now move!” She finished as the ship swam off.

...

“They will keep me alive! They...GRRARH...are using me as bait! I... will be... all right!” He said as the Fallen dragged him from my view.

There is one thing to to be subtle about it, but Miranda manages to be in a league of her own. She has no faith in the reader to puzzle things out for themselves, so she whacks them over with a 2-by-4 because she can't risk her precious book being complicated to any degree for her readers.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

Ahahah! I was wondering where that chapter was. :allears:

Hey Bobbin, I'm tempted to put your story, first part, into a kindle format for me to just keep and read whenever. I don't know how to put it in epub and I use kindle so it's pretty much for me. Would you mind if I did this? And perhaps upload it elsewhere for others to download and possibly convert?

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

I actually handcode the .opf and .ncx files, though I don't know all the shortcuts and tags to put in there. Has serviced me well before though. I'll have your username listed as the Author both in tags and on the title page, and the title page will also includes a link to the thread and, if you want, link to your SA profile.

Too bad I totally lack a cover page.

Looks like the site can convert .mobi files to .epub, but I have encountered a glitch already with that and gotta have to fix that. It also comes up with converting to PDF.

Thanks for the link, they really help.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

There is so much domestic violence subtext in all this that I'm afraid for Miranda. Him being someone in severe need for anger management becomes a plot point for Vertigo:

quote:

My oc Railrunner, for those who know that coaster well, know that he has an unstable temper - an unpredictable one at that. His temperment is a result of his dark past that troubles him greatly. Railrunner is stubborn and willful, but can be gentle and fun loving despite his appearance and threatening displays.

quote:

In Vertigo, Railrunner has a problem with his uncontrollable temper - in which his outburst are so violent that his will seems to not be in control and unexplainable happenings occur. He sits down with Mistymetal to explain what's been happening to him. Mistymetal is incredibly gentle with the red coaster. She thinks of him as if he's her son.
Note: Mistymetal is a character in Vertigo that does not appear in Twisted. My speculation is that she's the mother of Firetrack, the second red, there are couple of clues strewn around that hint at that.

quote:

Railrunner and Shadowtrack have been in love even before they were both transformed into twisted roller coasters (living roller coasters that reside in Amusement Park Between and you will find out how they changed in my book Twisted) In the sequel Vertigo, Railrunner begins to have...problems, horrendous displays through his unpredictable temper. Railrunner's temper is not ordinary like any other coasters. No, it is some sort of powerful force linked to him being a red. (you will find out what this is called once vertigo is released) His "power" is so severe that if angered to the breaking point, he could destroy both himself and Amusement Park Between. This has made Shadowtrack even more close to him despite the danger that she could endure. Her love seems to be the only thing that soothes him after any episode.

And it looks like compiling all the text from the ~*~Fanfic~*~ cracked my brain. I had my first Twisted! dream. I dreamt that I was visiting HorriblePencilist, and he had every published work of Miranda. All about Twisted! Some old comic/novel combo (where Railrunner befriends african-american bumper car and there are horrible racist undertones), and the first manuscript of Vertigo. I think there were 4-6 hardcovers in that collection of his, all first editions.

Iced Cocoa fucked around with this message at 10:06 on May 22, 2013

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

Radio! posted:

By "hints" you mean she outright states it several times over the course of one chapter, right?

Surprisingly enough, no. She hasn't published Vertigo yet, though a lot of her hold pieces have plot bits here and there. When we're at the last chapters I might end up compiling all those plot snippets to summarize Vertigo for the thread.

How I got to the conclusion is that Firetrack was raised in some specific place with his mother. He lived for most of his life there. Mistymetal has been at that location for ages, in some cave where she guards rides that were believed to be dead. (Please God don't have Angeltrack there :cripes:). Mistymetal also guards the secret on how Darkrail, the baddie of Vertigo, can be killed. Who was the one who killed Firetrack. And Mistymetal knows something about Railrunner's anger issues, and looks at Railrunner as his own son. Given how utterly simplistic and cliche Miranda's writing is, I don't really have any doubts that she is the mother of Firetrack.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

attackbunny posted:

Twisted rollercoaster names: Railrunner, Thunderbark, Firetrack, Shadowtrack, Angeltrack, Ironwheel, Mistymetal, Moonblood, Redrail, Freakshow, Prototype.

Actual rollercoaster names: The Cyclone, Leap-the-Dips, The Racer, Kingda Ka, Steel Dragon 2000, Top Thrill Dragster, Millennium Force, Saw: The Ride, Nemesis, Oblivion.

About the only thing I could see an amusement park actually naming a ride is Freakshow, although they would then get violently petitioned for disrespecting people with deformities or disabilities.

Well, you're not the only one thinking they're bad:

quote:

“First of all it’s not Woody – its [sic] Thunderbark.” He said as he stood there stone still while he barely breathed. He then dipped his head low, letting his long hair drape over his shoulders. The coaster engineer simply stared down, his eyes growing darker still.

“Okay, if that is your real name then don’t I have some freaky name if I’m from were [sic] you are?” I said letting out a soft laugh.

“Don’t mock our names they are warrior names.” Woody said crudely. “Your real name Rodney is Railrunner.”

“This is very dumb and confusing.” I replied sarcastically in defiance.

“I guess when you are in your human form for so long, you forget nearly everything.” Woody said under his breath.

And why does Thunderbark believe that Railrunner should remember anything, given that he was a newborn when he was moved across? :psyduck: Or is this a case of Miranda just reworking the plot of the book without editing what she wrote before?

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

JosephWongKS posted:

Wait a minute.

“Zegria was about the size of the shopping mall back in Huntersville”. This means an entire “city” in Amusement Park Between is only as big as one shopping mall in the “real world”.

“Zegria was about ten times bigger than Trenzon”. That means an entire “town” in Amusement Park Between is only 10% as big as big as one shopping mall in the real world.

In Chapter 21, it was stated of Trenzon that “The buildings were ten times the size here than in the real world”. This means that even though Trenzon’s buildings were ten times the size of those in the “real world”, the whole of Trenzon was still only 10% the size of the shopping mall in Huntersville.

Just how friggin’ enormous was the shopping mall in Huntersville? :stare:

:science:
Lets find out. So, lets say that Huntersburg/berg/ville is in pseudo-Tennessee, so let's check the biggest malls there... Well, apparently Tennessee doesn't have big enough malls to make the wiki list, so just lets say that Huntersburg/berg/ville was at one point called King of Prussia and it is in Pennsylvania. The largest mall in America is located there. It is 2,793,200 square feet. Now then, lets head back to Tennessee and find any towns the size of that, so we can have some measurement. 2,793,200 square feet = 0.1002 square miles.

But there is no town that size. The smallest town as far as I can see is Cottage Grove, which is 0.2 square miles, with the lowest population in that size category, 88 people.

Well, this is going nowhere, so lets check the other town, Trenzon. We know that it's 10th of the size of Zegria, and it had forty rides. Trenzon's size is 279,320 square feet, that divided by forty makes...

Population density is 3992 per square mile (1541.4 per square kilometer). Which is somewhere between Denver and Chicago.

Screw it, have the picture from the upcoming re-release that comes with this chapter:

Iced Cocoa fucked around with this message at 16:13 on May 24, 2013

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

You still haven't seen the most absurd piece of clothing in the book yet.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

Black: Paranomal Detective
Book V: The Deadly Ride

By Bobbin Threadbare

MOBI, ePub and PDF located here

drat this took a while, CSS was not co-operating in places and it's hard to make the book look consistent between the different kindle versions. I am unable to test the ePub format since I've not really installed any ePub reader or ebook emulators that read ePub.

If anyone makes a cover I'll add that to the file. If the ePub is broken, I can upload the raw html files for anyone who knows more than me on how to make ePub files.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

Antlerhill posted:

I tried my hand at a cover.



Nice! I'll update those ebooks after work. Having too much trouble for some reason, maybe in few days.

Is that a toilet plunger?

Iced Cocoa fucked around with this message at 20:32 on May 27, 2013

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

Voltin Bolt posted:

All of the drawings and descriptions treating the rides like anthropomorphic biped creatures really makes me think of the countless deviantART OCs with fuckoff huge wings which are optional / don't appear in shapeshifted forms / retractable / can be made invisible because they're too hard to account for. Don't design a character with a bunch of ostentatious bullshit details if you're not going to stick to it! :argh:

This is why I actually prefer her older art, not only does it not have that much human anatomy where it doesn't belong, but in most shots the rest of the bodies were doing at least something. Not disappearing or floating off in the distance or sitting down in chairs where it isn't possible.

But of course:

Miranda Leek posted:

Like I said, I HATE my old art and I've practiced Twisted's characters enough to where I can draw them as I imagined them.

Apparently she has always imagined them as humanoid bipedal creatures who have tail that's doing gently caress-all.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

I knew that Miranda never finished on a cliffhanger like this one, so I checked and yes, this is not the end of that chapter. Dunno what went wrong, so have the picture from that chapter that comes after this the last paragraph posted:



No higher picture quality on her site or the kindle copy unfortunately.

And here's the vampire angle on this story.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

This is how you write a villain that's rarely seen. This is how you manage a special power that makes sense even if it differs between individuals. That's of course if Beatrice is telling the truth. It's also interesting that she kept her human connection if she still considered herself to be Beatrice instead of her "True Name", subtlety that Miranda seems incapable of.


SSNeoman posted:

Railrunner is The Hero, right? Because "drinking blood of your enemies" is generally a villainous quality.

The reluctant and/or redeemable vampire is a common trope.

JosephWongKS, can you see in the book what it says in the picture that's with this chapter? The bark, the sign and the ribbon?

Iced Cocoa fucked around with this message at 23:38 on May 30, 2013

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

SSNeoman posted:

Yeah, except Railrunner is neither reluctant or redeemable. I mean he just killed a being and harvested its blood with no remorse or secondary thoughts.

I also meant to point out that I TOTALLY CALLED The Angu Ra to have other MacGuffin powers, and lo it was so. It can grant energy and deflect concussion beams! Maybe it has even more loving powers we don't know about.

While it is a common trope, it is to be expected from Miranda to only use a part of a trope. It's like she is just cargo-culting from popular books and movies without any thought behind it. Sometimes we end up with blatant ripoffs, other times we end up with unintended mix of good guy vampire and werewolf.

And im pretty sure that the beam that destroyed tanks and concussion beams is the one and the same power.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

I think I should mention that as someone who has read this book before, I actually can't pinpoint this particular passage to any point in the book, doesn't matter who is supposed to have blood-stained wheels. I know where it is supposed to be, but there are several things in the passage that contradict that part of the book.

Iced Cocoa fucked around with this message at 22:03 on Jun 1, 2013

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

The picture for this chapter:

quote:


I think the Chainlink name is a reference to the Chain Hill in roller coasters, the first hill in a roller coaster. That's the only thing I can really think of. But given how nonsensical the rest of the names are, such as Razorblade of all things, I can't really give any real assertion of how Miranda thinks things through.

And now Railrunner got an army of roller coasters.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011



Look at that bed. Look at the desk. That bed is too short to accommodate the sheer length of Railrunner.

Look at that book as well.

"Roller
Coaster"


And of course there is also a hanzo steel katana on the bookshelf.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

The whole thing about air-time is also absurd when considering the fact that Railrunner has never experienced it. He has never been on a roller coaster in his life as Rodney since that would have just changed him into Railrunner, and Railrunner can't experience air-time because he's a roller coaster train and only the passengers can experience it.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

One thing, how did they even know about this plan in the first place? It's not as if the Fallen would have just announced it to everyone or else rides would already have tried to escape and prematurely triggered the slaughter. And it's not as if there is some double agent because we know already that there is visible, or smelling difference between the Fallen and the regular rides, so any double-agent would have been found out because they weren't Fallen.

:ughh: Miranda.

Why am I so bothered with this particular issue?

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

Bobbin, you excel where Miranda flounders. Here the phrase “A place from the most imaginative mind” actually applies. And I also can't help but feel the "you don't belong here" atmosphere of the whole world. It takes certain willpower to really overcome the "strangeness" of the whole world and the set pieces and the creatures. As if that you're not seeing everything that is "wrong" with the world, and there are things lurking there waiting to surprise you and perhaps something more sinister than just that.

Or I've been reading too much Lovecraft lately.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

And now, the only limitation of the roller coaster prophetic vision is eliminated. Railrunner can predict death. And it also sets up one of the more stupider parts of the book which are actually rendered paradoxical but I'll not talk about it now and bring it up later when it actually comes up.

e: As for the ebook versions, I was going to update at milestones, but I'll change that to keep up with Bobbin.

Iced Cocoa fucked around with this message at 12:07 on Jun 5, 2013

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

Well, it appears that Miranda decided to prune her gallery. She had spoken about it for a while. Apparently her main reason for that is that there were tons of pregnancy pictures appearing in the "More Like This" sections in all of her deviations (I wonder why...)

I had known this was going to happen, and I managed to save all the colored illustrations of the book, "The Most Horrifying Thing that is was in Miranda's dA Gallery" (TMHTtiwiMdAG), and all the Vertigo hints and spoilers.

With the last one it appears that my hunch was right, most of the deviations that were about Vertigo got axed as well.

As JWKS is now over two thirds done with Twisted, is there any interest in knowing what's going to happen in the sequel? Don't worry, Railrunner still gets powers for no reason at all and will go unchallenged through everything and there will also be more stupid love stuff happening.

Or is there any interest in seeing :nms::gonk::nms: TMHTtiwiMdAG? :nms::gonk::nms:

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

Do let us know when it's out. From what I've seen of your writing I only want more.

As for some actual content, have some more cow Merrylegs



Goddamn Miranda, scale. Scale is so important.

Moo.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

JosephWongKS posted:

Why is Railrunner slipping the armor under his stupid trench-coat? Wouldn’t that undermine the point of trying to disguise themselves in the armor?
His trench coat has already proven to be able to obscure his identity as long as it doesn't slip off. He's just going incognito because the armor will reveal that he's a red.

JosephWongKS posted:

Do amusement park rides even have “skulls”?
Yes, but I can't remember if the throne room was layered with skulls, or if it was the throne or if Ironwheel dressed himself in skulls.

JosephWongKS posted:

Seriously, if you keep everything else in the story exactly the same (including Railrunner’s stupidity and Mary Sue-ness) but changed all the amusement park rides into werewolves, it would instantly reduce the silliness and ridiculousness of the story by 90%.
Including the whole "there is a special world just for werewolves" part? In its current form it's kind of ridiculous, but as Bobbin has proven, even the whole "special world for rides" concept can be reworked into something new and alien and isn't just parallel of our world.

JosephWongKS posted:

When and how did Buddy and Sly enter Amusement Park Between?
Buddy and Sly are no longer his friends. They've been replaced by Merrylegs and Static, because friendship is all about threatening to kill each other, or just one threatening to kill the other. As long as they know who's boss and that he can kill them without exerting himself, he'll be their friend, whether they like it or not.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

It's amazing that even after managing to decipher how it could actually be about no one is really sure if he was talking with some guys about the basics or if he was gathering supplies or making some basic plan all by himself.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

I've read Twisted! I know of all the plot yet to come, the twists and stupid powers and all that.

Reading your take on it is always surprising with what you bring to this world that I thought was done to death. I didn't know it was possible, the thought never really crossed my mind that something new could be done with the world of Twisted!

I did not see that twist coming. And while Black is certainly getting powers and insights in each chapter, it still feels more of a natural progression rather than power of convenience. While he may be diagnosed with small case of MC Syndrome, it still feels not like a cop-out and more realistic, well, within the rules of the world.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

I got a question. How the hell can Railrunner resemble the warden? Oh, I'm sure that here are some minute details of the face equal to how we can tell people apart by the face and how pet owners can recognize their labrador from a sea of labradors. However those minute details between two individuals do not really matter when they are of two different colors! And also when Railrunner is a red roller coaster, there is no mistaking him for anyone else. So how do they resemble? Do they have full-face skull helmets on? Do they both wear magic trenchcoats that hide their main color?

Please note the level of violence, ruthlessness and self-gratification bordering on masturbation in this chapter, or maybe just how long this chapter was. Then remember this was just to take over a prison. Then remember this same army is going to take down a capital city, which is going to be much bigger than just mere prison.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

Who's ready with their eyebleach? :v: Here are some of the most horrifying things that are were found in Miranda's dA gallery.

Note, everything is :nws:

Let's start light. Just what happens when a roller coaster is about to give birth to a red?

:gonk: http://i.imgur.com/cQHW4qD.jpg :gonk:

In the right page, to the left, the text says that the vagina only forms during labor. No sex bits at all until they're needed. But labor starts when the water breaks (where does it go out?) and the labor lasts between 30-48 hours.

So, what comes next?

:nms::gonk: http://i.imgur.com/dOmSh2k.jpg :gonk::nms:


Strange fact: I remember from the description of this piece that the orange coaster works as a midwife. In a world where that was the tenth birth. Miranda :argh:

And for the big finale.

:barf::gonk::nms::suicide: http://i.imgur.com/SjyenGs.jpg :suicide::nms::gonk::barf:

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

quote:

It now seemed like I was the balance to this world. A force that was to keep things at ease, harmonizing the good and bad things that I seemed to have no control over. Yet I had no control over some of the things that had to do with me. I had the dreams that caused pain; I had different abilities than any other roller coaster. There was also a predatory instinct, making me lick my lips when I saw blood, laugh when I saw my enemy’s death. Why? Was there something wrong with me? Couldn’t be, I was the way I was because I was born and not built.

Do you know how disturbing this is? It really says that nature trumps over nurture. That people are just born evil. It is in line with how the Fallen are created, caused by effects that they can't control but it was always going to be so.

But here it is simply stated that Railrunner can't do anything wrong because he was born unlike the other rides. It doesn't matter that he was raised by humans and learned their morals, when he went coaster, he went all in and believes that the supreme being such as him is supposed to be bloodthirsty, predatory and wholly lacks empathy for others.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

The illustration for this chapter:



Why are we supposed to think they're the good guys again?

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

Madoushi posted:

I was expecting the twist to be 'Railrunner, I am your father'. I guess my expectations are finally low enough that Miranda's writing can turn out better than not as terribly as I expected.

How could anyone actually not miss that? We've already seen so many pictures of pregnant Angeltrack and Thunderbark is always close to her. I was aware of that fact before I read the book, and I actually thought that Miranda had retconned the story, until Thunderbark said the story the second time, with another lie twist.

And also:

quote:

“Exactly. Then at the very end it all went to hell. When she well - delivered. Every coaster in our world knew.”

“Even Ironwheel.”

“Unfortunately. When he heard you had been born, he sent Freakshow and her troops. We found out that they were going to kill us and headed for the real world. And then the worst happened.”

So, Railrunner gets born and only the roller coaster trains of the Amusement Park Between get to know it, the moment he does. But the method of letting them know is strange. Apparently Ironwheel "hears" it. So Angeltrack or Railrunner would have had to screamed at a frequency that only roller coaster trains can hear, and also spread across the Amusement Park Between. :psyduck:

Or Miranda didn't realize she wrote "heard" instead of "sensed".

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

Piell posted:

Railrunner has already demonstrated that he can create sounds that are heard all across Amusement Park Between, when he roared earlier.

Yes, but the difference was that Merrylegs could hear it as well. So unless baby Railrunner instinctively knows how to produce that roar but only so that roller coaster trains could hear, and he had big enough lungs for it, I'm not so sure about that particular roar.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

Mercedes posted:

The tension rising and deflating in one breath are my favorite

This is something that repeats in the novel. Every single conflict that's within the group of heroes has to be resolved in one chapter, or in the same chapter it arises. We had Thunderbark being mad at Railrunner going to the real world to see his girlfriend, there was the fact that Merrylegs and Static were not happy about Railrunner fighting in the arena. Both those problems were solved in the same chapter. Railrunner being mad at Merrylegs because Thunderbark got kidnapped was a tension that lasted onto the next chapter!

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

And now that Railrunner and Ironwheel are back in the real world, how big do you think the body count will be? Or who is going to kill someone first?

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

I wish I could say we've seen most if not all the abhorrent spousal abuse subtext and how Clare is like a complete and utter fuckdoll only for Railrunner's gratification. But no, Miranda had to add that last thing that's only there to serve Railrunner and no one else, especially not Clare. :smith:

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

And where did that 20 feet long thing came to begin with? The first mention of it as far as I can see is when JWKS is doing the review of chapter 11. I can't see anything prior to that at least. If anything I imagine Railrunner being twenty-feet tall when standing on the big legs on car four.

Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

That clears things up. So I decided to figure out how long he was really.

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Iced Cocoa
Jul 14, 2011

^^^^ There are six limbs to be exact hiding in that suit.

JosephWongKS posted:

A trench-coat was bad enough, but how does a suit even fit around something whose back is a series of open boxes filled with seats?

(far right)


I dunno, looks like the seats disappear because of magic. Probably the same way the limbs do.

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