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Jun 20, 2002

Update 14: The Art of Doing Nothing

inthesto hates the next battle and agreed that in order to keep the LP alive and help him not have to rush while settling into new surroundings for an LP, I would guest post an update, quality is not guaranteed.

We've arrived in Quonos Village and Synbios' forces are in their HQ.

: I have the power to sense good and evil... This town certainly has been cursed.

: Hey... We don't need that kind of talk, Grace. Please don't say such things.

: Odd, where is Julian?

: Yes... You're right, Lord Synbios. I didn't notice until now, but Julian is not with us.

: That's pretty strange... He was with us outside the village. I wonder... did something happen to him?

: Grace, I asked you not to say stuff like that! I... I don't like all this creepy stuff.

: Really? Sir Dantares, the supreme knight of the Republic, is frightened? I'll have to remember this.

: Julian on the other hand doesn't seem to fear being out and about.

: Well... Julian is an able swordsman. I guess he should be all right on his own... There is something strange here... We might as well look into it. Go with Grace and take a look around.

At this point we're freed to walk around, lets take everyone's read on the current situation.

: Everyone is worried about Julian. No one dares take a nap. I suspect you can't sleep either... But you should try to get as much rest as you can.

: ZZZZZZ...... Aahh! Who... Who is it! Oh, it's you, Lord Synbios. Please don't scare me like that! I'm just a little edgy right now. I'm a centaur, and we are able to sleep standing up. But with all the noise you made, I woke up, and can't seem to get back to sleep. I might as well stay awake now.

: I know I sounded tough to Sir Dantares, but to tell you the truth, I'm not good with this creepy stuff either. Why do we have to spend the night in such and eerie place?

: They're all so superstitious... I wish they'd all just grow up. I'm not afraid at all... Really...

: Didn't someone say once we reach the village we can eat? Well, where's the inn?! And the people?! I'm not afraid, I'm just HUNGRY! And I'm starting to get cranky!

: Did anyone find Julian? What could have happened to him? Maybe a wild beast got him...

: I wonder if Zero managed to find Prince Medion, or is he still flying around the Empire... Who knows where he will end up... Zero is my little brother... I worry so very much about him.

This is our chicken, an able bodied and ultimately important part of our force. How else will we get fresh eggs on the road?

This town seems to be completely empty and immediately as soon as you start walking around things start happening that indicate all is not right.

: While we're searching through this village, keep an eye out for Julian.

A door ominously opens and slams shut, this immediately riles up Grace.

Turning around the corner the local goods have decided they have the best inventory system:

Moving along...

At this point in Symbios' place if I were not already comfortable with animal people and wishes coming true to miraculously heal the sick I'd be pretty sure I was on some sort of hallucinogen.

Even the Church is empty and there seems to be a fairy hanging out up front.

Well that's nice of you

There is nothing to do but progress into the graveyard/mansion. Honestly who designs such a thing? Have you ever known such a place to really exist outside of a funeral home? Sure Ted, come on over, just make sure you don't kick over Nana's tombstone when you round the corner! But I digress.

Taking Grace's advice we turn around but suddenly a wild NPC appears in this grey wash of desolation.

: This is not a ghost town. It is... ruled by an evil spirit.

: Who are you?

: My name is Kahn. I am an Elbesem monk in search of a key that will save the world.

: So, you ARE an Elbesem monk...!

: Ho! Now we finally meet face to face. You have been following me for a long time now. I had meant to greet you... sooner or later.

: I see I have worried you, Synbios. Well... I've finally reached my destiniation, but I couldn't sit still. You, monk... Your purpose here is to defeat the Vandal monster that rules over Quonus?

: Did you say Vandal? Can't be..! The mythical rulers of darkness? It just can't be that they exist!

: Julian, wasn't it? You seem to be quite knowledgeable in this area. My travels have just happened to bring me her, but this is obviously your chosen destination. Is it your intent to fight the Vandal?

: What's wrong with you, Julian..? The Vandals don't exist, but even if they did, how do you know you can defeat one?

: My father was brutally killed in the Kingdom of Enrich by Galm, a Vandal who most certainly does exist. I've been searching for Galm ever since.
Julian is actually making a reference to Shining the Holy Ark here, Galm was a Vandal in that game and it is largely implied that he is a child NPC you meet in the game.

: You have dedicated your life to avenging your father's death, but are you willing to dedicate your death as well? Vandals are very powerful...

: Vandals...

: Something's happening! Terrible evil spirits... Could it possibly be...? We better call everyone together.

: There is no need for that, Grace.

: When you did not return in time, we came out to look for you. Then we heard your voice.

: I had not known that a Vandal was behind the rumors of the cursed village of Quonus. Nor did I know that Julian was searching for it.

: I am sorry that I used you, but let's focus on the fighting for now. If we live, then you can chew me out.

: Wait. something's wrong... These kyon-shi... They aren't truly dead, and they're being controlled from the mansion!

: I see... to avoid fighting our forces, he's sent a bunch of peons to fight for him. Heh, heh.. Vandal, you are a coward!

: You don't quite understand. These kyon-shi are actually the villagers under a spell! We can't fight them, as it will kill them and really turn this into a ghost town. Leave them to me and I'll handle it.

Here is the map of the battle field, there's a big pond in the middle of it that makes me further incredulous of the design of this area, apparently there's no zoning laws in Quonos.
Throughout the fight as you progress in the map, several enemies will burst out of the gravestones, giving you actually something to do. You may be confused why I say that but they really aren't kidding, you can mass slaughter the whole town by killing any of the kyon-shi.

The kyon-shi themselves aren't that threatening but being that we just signed up for the pinic in a bog club their damage delt is completely one sided. Your entire force will spend the majority of the battle staring at the nonsensical mansion graveyard bog.

Kahn is AI controlled in this battle, he has a special orb that makes him able to defeat the villagers without killing them. It has the same area of effect of Blaze 2 but it's insanely good luck if you've ever got the staggering villagers more than 3 blocks from each other, they're just not motivated to move much

The animation is all flashy and reminiscent of an earlier time when people made jokes about Japanese cartoons causing seizures, this image gives you the basic idea of what it looks like but I felt like it wouldn't be a proper LP if you didn't share my suffering times a dozen kyon-shi almost exactly as it really is.

That's better!

The kyon-shi are not power hitters but you need to keep your team healing occasionally so in the rare instance that you charge around looking for ways to die you don't managed to get mobbed by two whole enemies at once.

Pictured: Dantares the great contemplates the nature of bogs.

His riding up to that location actually triggers the first tombstone spawns, these vampire bats will be around for a few battles so I'll let inthesto talk about them.

I feel a need to impress upon readers just how dull this battle is, you spend 80% of it with your party just shifting around acting like this is a great place to hang out to ominous music. I thought about making a joke about everyone taking drugs and just kinda stumbling around going "whoa man" but I'm too classy to do anything but over explain such a joke.

Dantares and Eldar make a pact to kill everything that moves and meets the criteria of "Not a villager under evil magic spells." It takes several turns of the force milling about before this comes to fruition.

I wanted to take a moment to point out that Kahn has the worst Cestus ever, I am pretty sure that just about anything they could have rendered on his arm would have been better than weapon that makes Barrett of FF7 look nominally scaled

As we round the pond a skeleton appears, he is not around long enough for me or the force to recall as Dantares and Eldar go berzerk trying to get dibs on it and any Vampire bats they can approach.

Eldar is helping

This right here is what upsets people most about this fight, if you have been spending time trying to keep your force strong and tough you get this ridiculous situation where a kyon-shi attacks Symbios and he decides to counter, beating the crap out of our magic zombie in a single hit, if it was Dantares we'd have lost one.

Kahn's AI follows Symbios all over the place, resulting in a situation where not only is your force hanging out doing nothing, you have a ping pong of Kahn chasing the leader around as if fully aware of the new vow of pacifism they have all embraced and intent on making it as painful as possible.

Yeah that's right, take care of that and get back to me. I'll be in my office.

Eventually everyone makes it to the mansion side of the map and then the first major threat appears.

The Lich!

At this point I've barely been paying attention so long I put no thought into sending Julian in to beat on the new and imminent threat to our well being.
The Lich knows this.

: Tornado 3!

Wait, what?


Julian No!

Cybel quickly retaliates with a critical to avenge Julian's sudden vampire bat tickled death instigated by the lich.

Alright, he should be about done.

The Lich introduces itself as the first enemy that casts heal.

Hayward quickly gets tired of this nonsense and jumps up with his own critical to put the battle to an end with an ice arrow.

After the battle

: I'm still sensing evil energies from within. If we want to revive Quonus Village, we must brave the dangers, and enter this unholy mansion.

: I'm well aware of the dangers, Kahn. I came here to defeat it, and I'll fight it even if I have to go in alone.

: Goodbye? You're kidding right?

: Synbios is right. Listen, both of you, did we ever say we wouldn't fight the Vandal? The Vandal can plunge this land into darkness. It is the enemy of all sane men. We cannot run from this. But are we ready to face it now? Now is not the time to be rash and leap into things prematurely. Proper preparations will prove to be our best ally.

: In any world, there are men of purity. Your courage is impressive. For now, allow me to join forces with you.

: This fight will be quite difficult. Once we are all healed and prepared, then we will return to battle this Vandal.

Our village is not massacred, but the people are not free, a vandal lurks in the mansion and we're just now starting to learn that it's not just politics we have to deal with but supernatural evil as well.

Hope you didn't think I was going to do the mansion for you inthesto

Next time: Existential Evil enjoys summer homes

RuanGacho fucked around with this message at Jul 9, 2013 around 22:41


Jun 20, 2002

Kahn is a fair to good character, I voiced my resentment about him mainly out of a quiet decade old ache that this game get a western localized remake very badly. Maybe it's time has passed as far as the western market's appetite for SRPGs not released by NIS but when I day dream about a Shining Force Strategy Anthology made of the 3 central titles of the series I imagine Kahn would look more like the benders from the Avatar series than the cestus that shouldn't be.

Jun 20, 2002

Ahaha holy poo poo inthesto I thought I messed up bad when I let Julian eat the one tornado 3 in the SS cover of that fight but that was a pretty hillarious twist I was not expecting from your video.

Ok so my rendition of the orb was a little over the top but I'd argue modern screens make it less bad.

Kahn dying twice

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