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my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous


Dio, are we allowed to make negative votes?

If we are, negative vote for H
If we're not, vote for D

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cxp
Mar 27, 2010


Fun Shoe

I've been convinced, changing my vote to F.

Lord Cyrahzax
Oct 11, 2012



I

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007


my dad posted:

Dio, are we allowed to make negative votes?

If we are, negative vote for H
If we're not, vote for D
For now, sure. That may change of it becomes a problem but I don't think it will be. All I ask is, to make it easier to count, just say "Not X" For the love of Denziroh please don't cast a regular vote AND a not-vote, you get one or the other, if we get two we may count both by mistake.








Blood dripping from your scalp in a narrow stream and down your face, terrified shrieks behind you, you run as fast as you can, trying to choke back tears. Others in the village watch you as you run and watch the scene unfolding but all keep their distance and do nothing as Jalitha continues to shriek and beg.

You find your uncle Jorah at the edge of the village chopping trees. He is a grown up and very old but younger than your father. You, being a four year old are too young to understand, but your uncle Jorah is in his mid 20s and your father, is in his late 30s. Jorah sometimes takes you out to fish with him, or takes you when he goes to cut wood. He spends lots of time with you and likes to have you with him when he works. Sometimes he throws you so high in the air you can almost touch the birds! You laugh and giggle with delight when he does so because you know he will always catch you!

He can take down a tree in a single blow with his stone axe!






He must be the strongest man in the world! Well, no, he is not the strongest man in the world, which to your young mind may as well be this village, nor can he cut down a tree in a single axe blow, but he is tall and he is strong. His hair is long and braided behind his head, like all of the men of your home and is almost two feet long.



You race towards where you hope he is cutting down trees.







You run as he takes a final swing at the large palm tree and it begins to fall over, you, a young child, continue to run, oblivious.

You look towards Jorah who now sees you and whose face is an expression of horror as the tree falls in your general direction.

He yells to move as he races towards you and you, towards him. The tree is falling. You are oblivious to the tree and do not know if it is going to fall on you, he scoops you up and moves aside at the last moment, carrying you, the tree slamming into the ground somewhere near the two of you and making a loud and startling crashing sound which causes you to let out a shriek of terror.

Jorah, holding you in his arms looks at your bloody face and half finished haircut and yells in great confusion over the source of your injuries "Are you alright!? Are you alright?! You almost fell beneath the tree! What happened!?"

You....

OPTION A Break down completely and shriek and sob because your family is fighting, you were hurt, you were almost hit by a tree and there was a loud and scary sound from the tree falling and now Uncle Jorah is yelling too and this is all too much for you and WAAAAAAAAAAH!

OPTION B stammer out between sobs "Papa...! HURT!" then break down sobbing.

OPTION C say between choked sobs "Papa...! Help...!

OPTION D scream "JALITHA IS A WITCH!"

OPTION E yell out the words "SEA CAKES!" to your confused uncle between sobs and point towards your home.

OPTION F scream out "JALITHA!"then break down sobbing.

OPTION G Something else! Specify what you want to say. Today, you, a four year old, were about to get your favorite treat, watched one family member savagely beat another, took a cut to your scalp, now have a bloody face, almost had a tree fall on you and there was a loud and scary noise and are now held in the arms of a confused and scared adult who is yelling also! It's been a rough morning, hasn't it, Champ? Make what you want to say appropriate for your age and experience. If G wins but a single variation does not beat the other options, we will combine the winning Gs.

OPTION H Try to summon all of the self control, discipline and willpower that you, a four year old child can in a herculean effort to yell out "PAPA IS HURTING JALITHA! STOP HIM!" and THEN break down sobbing. This will be tough and random chance is a factor in the game. If you pick this one, there is a chance you might replace words with sobs, not saying what you intended, or breaking down completely, this also applies to G above.

Random chance sometimes comes into play, beside your abilities, the nature of the world and many other things come into play. Written options wont always succeed. Generally, if it is clear if an option is guaranteed to succeed it will say that you do it, if success is uncertain, it will usually say something like you try, attempt, make your best effort etc. The odds of your success and your ability to accurately judge those odds wont always be written perfectly correctly but tend to be in the rough ballpark. I am a MOSTLY reliable narrator! Or not!

Diogines fucked around with this message at May 22, 2013 around 16:15

the_steve
Nov 9, 2005

We're always hiring!

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous


the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

This Changed my vote.

my dad fucked around with this message at May 22, 2013 around 16:24

There Bias Two
Jan 13, 2009

Chakh'mah Mush'lam Echad Rak

F! There's no need to attempt to shout save Jalitha when Jalitha will work just fine.

Okay, you've convinced me F could be misinterpreted. Let's gamble on Save Jalitha!

There Bias Two fucked around with this message at May 22, 2013 around 17:32

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous


UnassemblyRequired posted:

F! There's no need to attempt to shout save Jalitha when Jalitha will work just fine.

What if uncle thinks that we meant that Jalitha hurt us?

Neraren
Sep 15, 2006
Random Nerd #753897

Diogines posted:

OPTION B stammer out between sobs "Papa...! HURT!" then break down sobbing.

This is the option most likely to send him running back the way we came. We don't have to explain the whole situation, just get him over there.

B!

Xun
Apr 25, 2010

Help I can't get up I'm Gay


the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

I like this

Theglavwen
Jun 10, 2006

Frankly, I don't know anyone who likes Chinese bronzes, but I have one of the finest collections in the country.

C: Straight forward, no chance of loving up, it'll get Jorah moving urgently back to where he needs to be, but not specify too much, so he arrives with an open mind. Saying 'Papa Hurt', or B, will probably make him think his brother has been hurt, or is in danger, either confusing him or pissing him off when he gets back and finds out his brother isn't hurt, or worse, may make him think Jalitha was trying to hurt his brother, delaying his intervention as he wonders if his brother has just gotten things under control.

Of course, I suppose Papa Help might suggest to him that we want him to help beat up Jalitha, but I doubt it.

Hobo
Dec 12, 2007
Forum bum

the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

Voting for this. G

Beef-Stew
Feb 1, 2005
mmmmmmm... Beefy

If we can reliable choke out two words, how about "Papa... Mad!". This way he'll show up with the intention of calming down his brother or at least knowing he's upset. He may momentarily think that dad hurt us, but I think he'll restrain him before getting all stone axey on him. Showing up bleeding and specifying Jalitha with elaboration, a known foreign slave who dad is actively pummeling, may not pan out well.

Edit: My concern with "Papa...Help" is that, as you mentioned, it might sound like we want him to help Papa whoop on Jalitha. What if we point at our head as well as where the smackdown is occurring? It's a little dishonest, but again, it will probably get uncle to pull daddo off her.

Beef-Stew fucked around with this message at May 22, 2013 around 16:31

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous


Theglavwen posted:

C: Straight forward, no chance of loving up, it'll get Jorah moving urgently back to where he needs to be, but not specify too much, so he arrives with an open mind. Saying 'Papa Hurt', or B, will probably make him think his brother has been hurt, or is in danger, either confusing him or pissing him off when he gets back and finds out his brother isn't hurt, or worse, may make him think Jalitha was trying to hurt his brother, delaying his intervention as he wonders if his brother has just gotten things under control.

Of course, I suppose Papa Help might suggest to him that we want him to help beat up Jalitha, but I doubt it.

Alright, you've convinced me. C it is.

Supreme Allah
Oct 6, 2004

I choose to expose myself

Nap Ghost

the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

This G.

Grognan
Jan 23, 2007

Money And Power Through Homicide!



the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

This

Althair
Jul 26, 2006
words are weapons

H Willpower is like a muscle. Exercising it makes it stronger. We will be strong!

Walrusmaster
Sep 21, 2009


the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

This, then we can collapse into incoherent sobs

Greaseman
Aug 12, 2007


the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

Has my vote. We may break down afterwards.

dyzzy
Dec 22, 2009

argh


the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

Sounds good to me.

Pochoclo
Feb 4, 2008
I like bread



Clapping Larry

G. "Save Jalitha!" while pointing

Flame112
Apr 21, 2011


I'm voting for G: Papa mad! it gets the point across and, if uncle agrees with Dad about the demon witch, doesn't implicate us as a nonbeliever or anything.

GoneWithTheTornado
Mar 27, 2013


the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

Should be effective, voting for this.

OhYo
Apr 13, 2006



A, D, F and E are off the table for me. They're either useless to our mission, distracting or confusing.

Diogines posted:

Written options wont always succeed.
Both G and H are less likely to get their messages across than the other options. B and C match our mission and C is more neutral for Jorah to make up his mind upon sight of the situation.

Althair posted:

H Willpower is like a muscle. Exercising it makes it stronger. We will be strong!
Whoa you may have a point here. So you think taking chances like these will improve our character's personality? Definitely puts custom or "dangerous" options back on my table. This might suggest there's a reward for risking something.

Diogines posted:

Random chance sometimes comes into play, beside your abilities, the nature of the world and many other things come into play.

...

Try to summon all of the self control, discipline and willpower
Let's start growing self control, discipline and willpower, 3 things our father doesn't have.
H

Beef-Stew
Feb 1, 2005
mmmmmmm... Beefy

Yeah, actually I'm down with G. Save Jalitha!. I'm a little worried we might only choke out Jalitha... but I don't think two words should be too much to ask.

Hot Dog Day 80
Jun 23, 2003


the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

This works for me.

Mexican Deathgasm
Aug 17, 2010



Ramrod XTreme

B, "Jalitha" is a long word and I don't trust our dumb 4-year-old lips to say it. "Papa! Hurt!" will be sure to get a fast response.

Pochoclo
Feb 4, 2008
I like bread



Clapping Larry

We could always just say something like "come! quick!" and let our uncle sort out the situation without prior bias.

HardDiskD
May 6, 2009

HaHAHhehehehuhehahehhahahhaue




Grimey Drawer

the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

This!

Arkanomen
May 6, 2007

All he wants is a hug


Pochoclo posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" while pointing

Voting for G. but with the modifier of not trying to hard to get her name perfect. We are 4 years old, try Jali or JalJal.

Christina Arugula
Aug 10, 2004
How do you like your lawn? Broiled or charred?


Ramrod XTreme

Save Jalitha! and then run back towards our father.

Hot Dog Day #82
Jul 5, 2003



Soiled Meat

the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

I am with the_steve! Choice G seems to be our best bet to get Uncle's attention, given our age.

EVG
Dec 17, 2005

If I Saw It, Here's How It Happened.


Pochoclo posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" while pointing

This!

Jenner
Jun 5, 2011
Lowtax banned me because he thought I was trolling by acting really stupid. I wasn't acting.


WAAAAAAH, that was scary!

Dog Kisser
Mar 30, 2005

But People have fears that beasts do not. Questions, too.


the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

Yepppp. That.

GloriousDemon
May 1, 2009


the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

Voting with this. Maybe our 'willpower' comes through stronger on our collective voices agreeing like on the MINE votes, or maybe it's all random chance, this could be a good indicator.

Canuck-Errant
Oct 28, 2003

MOOD: BURNING - MUSIC: DISCO INFERNO BY THE TRAMMPS

Grimey Drawer

Voting for H, and I made a thing:


Not sure about the background image, but that's easy to replace.

Save Target As
Oct 13, 2008



Joining the G "Save Jalitha!"

Deadly Ham Sandwich
Aug 19, 2009

Labaras went into the wilds and brought Enkidu food and then, brought him a slave from the Temple of El, to um... shall we say, gentle him.



Smellrose

Voting G. "Where to begin. I have had one heckof a day, uncle. I was having a good time with Jalitha and she was going to make me some delicious sea weed cakes. Then my father goes into a rage and grabs Jalitha and starts beating her. No one is stopping him. You have to stop him before he kills my sea weed cakes, I mean Jalitha."

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Snow Job
May 24, 2006



The G vote that sounds like F.

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