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Diet Crack
Jan 15, 2001

I had a game the other day where a guy had 3 shots on goal to my 32 and roughly 7 mins of possession to his 1. Take a wild guess who won the game because they were the home team on the last shift with a goalie literally standing on it's loving head..

Thing is I don't remember it being this bad when the game initially came out. It was either the patch or the latest tuner set that introduced magical puck possession abilities.

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Volkerball
Oct 15, 2009

by FactsAreUseless

THE MACHO MAN posted:



I had two other games just before this where I also doubled their shots and possession stats, and otherwise dominated the game in all other categories, but lost by 1 due to unscreened goals from the blueline.

I see why sba spends his time harassing Rammer.

You didn't even crack 20 penalty minutes. You deserved to lose.

bub spank
Feb 1, 2005

the THRILL

THE MACHO MAN posted:



I had two other games just before this where I also doubled their shots and possession stats, and otherwise dominated the game in all other categories, but lost by 1 due to unscreened goals from the blueline.

I see why sba spends his time harassing Rammer.

I just played a game where I outshot the other guy 32 to 9 and out possessed him 7:54 to 3:52.

He won 2-1.

I also just lost a game 8-3 where the other guy only took 16 shots. Almost all of his goals came from flipping the puck in from my blueline, having it hit the boards behind the net and bounce really high 2 or 3 times, and then tapping it in when it landed while I stood there futilely trying to stop him with pokechecks. I guess he figured out how to beat the game, because drat.

THE MACHO MAN
Nov 15, 2007

...Carey...

draw me like one of your French Canadian girls
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YAHaNYZgr4

DIE PUBBIE

aunt jenkins
Jan 12, 2001

Sounds like '15 will be unveiled on Monday.

Volkerball
Oct 15, 2009

by FactsAreUseless

xzzy
Mar 5, 2009

aunt jemima posted:

Sounds like '15 will be unveiled on Monday.

ULTRA HD RAGDOLL PHYSICS.

Furnaceface
Oct 21, 2004




aunt jemima posted:

Sounds like '15 will be unveiled on Monday.

Now featuring even more sub menus within the sub menus. And music by Nickelback.

Pleads
Jun 9, 2005

pew pew pew


NHL15: Everything New is Old Again

The Rev
Jun 24, 2008
NHL 15 will just re-hype their fight engine by allowing for the loss of player teeth. Next-gen NHL will have real teeth physics!*

*Your teeth will fall out five at a time whenever you nudge the goal off the pegs.

triplexpac
Mar 24, 2007

Suck it
Two tears in a bucket
And then another thing
I'm not the one they'll try their luck with
Hit hard like brass knuckles
See your face through the turnbuckle dude
I got no love for you
Am I crazy or was there a hockey game around 2005 that had funny commentary?

I seem to remember one of the games having announcers that would just make fun of poo poo sometimes, it made me laugh.

Volkerball
Oct 15, 2009

by FactsAreUseless

triplexpac posted:

Am I crazy or was there a hockey game around 2005 that had funny commentary?

I seem to remember one of the games having announcers that would just make fun of poo poo sometimes, it made me laugh.

Yeah, it was Don Taylor. He was in for a few years versions, but I remember him from 2002. "He plays hockey with a scowl on his face. But he also barbecues with a scowl on his face, so I wouldn't read too much into that." That game was the best.

Volkerball fucked around with this message at 19:04 on May 4, 2014

Hockles
Dec 25, 2007

Resident of Camp Blood
Crystal Lake

Maybe I'll play with sound on in NHL 15.

Nope, I still won't.

Doctor Butts
May 21, 2002

I saw the teaser video.

And apparently its realism when there's enough of a breeze in a stadium that your jersey will ripple like a flag.

Anders
Nov 8, 2004

I'd rather score...

... but I'll grind it good for you
NHL15: New commentary, game bought.

checksin
Nov 23, 2006

I joined the new sensation, the #RXT REVOLUTION~!

:chillout:

he knows...

Volkerball posted:

Yeah, it was Don Taylor. He was in for a few years versions, but I remember him from 2002. "He plays hockey with a scowl on his face. But he also barbecues with a scowl on his face, so I wouldn't read too much into that." That game was the best.

Was that a Hitz game? Hitz games had amusing commentary, particularly during loading screens when they just let the announcers do bits.

My point is bring back hitz forever please

sba
Jul 9, 2001

bae

Doctor Butts posted:

I saw the teaser video.

And apparently its realism when there's enough of a breeze in a stadium that your jersey will ripple like a flag.

*Dynamic Cloth Technology©

xzzy
Mar 5, 2009

New, smarter AI. For realsies this time.

aunt jenkins
Jan 12, 2001

Looks like a split release, with PS3/360 having a very small subset of the PS4/Xbone features - looks like basically just new commentary and some crap about multiplayer collision physics.

Here's the next-gen feature list, though:

12 PLAYER NHL COLLISION PHYSICS
For the first time in any sports game, real-world physics affects every player through every on-ice collision with the new 12 Player NHL ® Collision Physics. Utilizing the power of the next generation consoles, and building off the critically-acclaimed NHL Collision Physics system, every player on the ice is governed by physics at all times. Feel the hard-hitting chaos of NHL hockey through true-to-life secondary collisions, net scrambles and player pileups, capturing the desperation of every shift.

REAL PUCK PHYSICS
The puck is one of the most complex items in the game to authentically replicate and it finally gets its due in NHL 15. Completely rebuilt puck physics result in a more realistic feel to every puck interaction. Everything on the ice, including the ice surface itself, is live which leads to the unpredictable and authentic puck spins, rolls and bounces seen in a real NHL game.

AUTHENTIC PLAYER & EQUIPMENT MODELS
The Next Generation Hockey Player has been rebuilt from the ice up. Now player models have three distinct layers - the body, equipment, and jersey. Each layer interacts independently, making every contact with the puck or other players even more realistic. Dynamic Cloth technology adds an extra layer of realism as it reacts to the player’s movement as they explode up the ice, helping bring the speed of the game to life.

UNPRECEDENTED PLAYER LIKENESS
Powered by the same technology that brought the most realistic representation of the athlete to EA SPORTS UFC, NHL 15 delivers groundbreaking player likeness, emotion and animation. From the strides a player takes to get up the ice to the emotion on their face after scoring a game winning goal, the players are as real as they’ve ever been.

SUPERSTAR SKILL STICK
Now all the tools of an NHL superstar are in your hands. The revolutionary Skill Stick has evolved to give even more control to the player. Protect the puck, receive passes without breaking stride, and discover an arsenal of sweet new dekes, all with an intuitive right stick control scheme that is easy to use but packed with depth.

AUTHENTIC ARENAS
There is no feeling like being there, and we are giving you the best seats in the house. The power of the next-gen consoles finally allows the NHL franchise to capture every detail of an NHL arena. Unique arena elements from 19,000+ seat capacities to lighting and player entrance tunnels are captured with a level of detail not possible on the previous generation. Now those home games will truly feel like home.

NEW COMMENTARY TEAM
New voices for a new generation. NHL 15 welcomes the NBC Sports commentary team of Mike 'Doc' Emrick and Eddie Olczyk to the broadcast booth. TSN analyst Ray Ferraro will provide game insights at ice level. Combined with Real Life Broadcast Integration that will feature real-world pre-game video commentary with Doc and Eddie set against in-game visuals, NHL 15 takes a revolutionary step forward in sports videogames; where the lines between the real world of sport broadcast and the game are blurred.

NBC SPORTS GAME DAY PRESENTATION
The most realistic broadcast package in a video game to-date is possible because of a new partnership with NBC Sports. Set the scene with the NHL on NBC crew welcoming you to the city during the game intros and immerse yourself in an experience that matches what you see on television with NHL on NBC graphics and branding.

LIVING CROWDS
NHL 15 sets a new standard in videogames with over 9,000 individual crowd models with 4x the animations of previous generations. Take a look through the glass and you’ll see fans hold up signs with your name on them, costume wearing superfans, or even sections full of team rivals rooting against you. Feel their behavior change after dropping the gloves, landing a big hit, or scoring a clutch goal. The crowd is alive.

VISION AI
An elevated level of player intelligence, Vision AI features evolved awareness with players reading and reacting to potential plays. Scoring area recognition, pass anticipation, and enhanced team breakouts all improve the flow of the game.

xzzy
Mar 5, 2009

MEGA MENUS
Now with even longer lists of text to scroll through and even more submenus to dig through.



I really hope this game turns out good, I want to play video game hockey badly but they're just adding superficial poo poo instead of making the actual game better. :smith:

sba
Jul 9, 2001

bae
NO DEFENSE

Dangle motherfuckers who can't stop you and go top shelf bar down celly on every rush!!

Pleads
Jun 9, 2005

pew pew pew


Pleads posted:

NHL15: Everything New is Old Again

Nailed it

triplexpac
Mar 24, 2007

Suck it
Two tears in a bucket
And then another thing
I'm not the one they'll try their luck with
Hit hard like brass knuckles
See your face through the turnbuckle dude
I got no love for you
Can't wait to see all the new cheese goals and exploits these updated physics will have.

Soft Shell Crab
Apr 12, 2006

Sure the online will turn into a shitfest in couple weeks, most of the features will be rubbish and the ai will find new ways to be horrible, but I skipped 14 and want to see my jersey flap as I blow past a pile of players on a glorious next gen graphics.

xzzy
Mar 5, 2009

Only if they model hair too, if we can't rock the Giroux flow what's the point?

cname
Jan 24, 2013

by Lowtax
Can they actually program a hockey stick, this time? IE: If I skate through someone's stick, I don't literally skate through the stick.

Also, TURN THE gently caress AROUND! STOP SKATING BACKWARDS! loving TURN AND SKATE! Or is there a way to disable assisted backwards skating and I don't know?

Pleads
Jun 9, 2005

pew pew pew


cname posted:

Also, TURN THE gently caress AROUND! STOP SKATING BACKWARDS! loving TURN AND SKATE! Or is there a way to disable assisted backwards skating and I don't know?

There's an option under the settings > controller settings to disable auto-back skate.

Still doesn't work 100% of the time, and you're still hosed if you want to stand still but turn around so that you're not playing defense in the slot while facing the net because your character refuses to turn and face the puck.

xzzy
Mar 5, 2009

This cover vote is actually hard. Subban vs Kessel? How the gently caress do I pick between those two?

Aphrodite
Jun 27, 2006

xzzy posted:

This cover vote is actually hard. Subban vs Kessel? How the gently caress do I pick between those two?

Not Kessel.

aunt jenkins
Jan 12, 2001

How can you say no to this face?

xzzy
Mar 5, 2009

But Kessel is funny.

Aphrodite
Jun 27, 2006

xzzy posted:

But Kessel is funny.

Do you really want a picture of Phil Kessel in your house?

sba
Jul 9, 2001

bae

xzzy posted:

This cover vote is actually hard. Subban vs Kessel? How the gently caress do I pick between those two?

Kessel has the Boston vote on lockdown.

Jack_tripper
Jun 7, 2009

xzzy posted:

This cover vote is actually hard. Subban vs Kessel? How the gently caress do I pick between those two?

just use a picture of subban slew-footing kessel, I'm sure there are plenty of them already

sba
Jul 9, 2001

bae
NHL 15 thread:

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=3631670

Volkerball
Oct 15, 2009

by FactsAreUseless

Guignol posted:

Was that a Hitz game? Hitz games had amusing commentary, particularly during loading screens when they just let the announcers do bits.

My point is bring back hitz forever please

Nope. NHL 2002.

Duke Chin
Jan 11, 2002

Roger That:
MILK CRATES INBOUND

:siren::siren::siren::siren:
- FUCK THE HABS -
Oh sweet Jesus thank gently caress they left out Pierre Maguire

xzzy
Mar 5, 2009

Duke Chin posted:

Oh sweet Jesus thank gently caress they left out Pierre Maguire

I'm sure he volunteered but they didn't want to deal with the two bluray discs worth of audio.

Jovial Cow
Sep 7, 2006

inherently good

Pleads posted:

There's an option under the settings > controller settings to disable auto-back skate.

Still doesn't work 100% of the time, and you're still hosed if you want to stand still but turn around so that you're not playing defense in the slot while facing the net because your character refuses to turn and face the puck.

Holding vision control without touching the left stick generally cures this assuming you have auto back skate off. If it isn't doing it quite rapidly enough you can also flick the left stick in the opposite direction of the way you want to face while holding vision control. This will make your man back skate in that direction thus facing you towards the target. I'm not 100% positive but I think balance plays a role in how quickly your guy can pivot as well.

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waffle enthusiast
Nov 16, 2007



xzzy posted:

I'm sure he volunteered but they didn't want to deal with the two bluray discs worth of audio.

I could straight up listen to Doc read a Chipotle menu all day. Assuming it also comes with Eddy's patented "Now…stop it right here" technology, I will buy this game day one.

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