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Robindaybird posted:I decided at one point that I was gonna try "poaching" an egg on some hot rice. So I cook up some rice, and I think I probably put too much water in it, for when the rice cooker went off, it did look somewhat soggy, but basically - the instant it's done I dumped it in the bowl, crack the egg in it, broke the yolk and mixed it up good. Cracking a raw egg over rice is a real thing and it's delicious.
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Jan 28, 2014 22:51
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that I know, but it didn't turn out well in my case - the rice was too wet is what I think what caused the problem.
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Jan 28, 2014 22:52
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Thanks for the bukkake link. Wow, didn't think I'd be saying those words twice in one day.
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Jan 29, 2014 00:43
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Robindaybird posted:that I know, but it didn't turn out well in my case - the rice was too wet is what I think what caused the problem. If your egg refuses to cook in race, hock it in the microwave for 30 seconds. That's my fix when it's a bit too runt for my tastes. You'll figure out rice eventually, I have faith in you. dino. posted:A store where the shoppers have TASTE. I could not for the life of me find the sceen from Infamous where he tries to buy a honk of good cheese for xmas, and can only find Velveeta, so here's the sceen from a few minutes after with capote talking about football: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cfYtc-nDXzw I've made some terrible cooking mistakes in my time, but nothing compares to the time I teargassed the entire house when trying to saute some habaneros. Suspect Bucket fucked around with this message at 00:50 on Jan 29, 2014 |
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Jan 29, 2014 00:47
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Wife made some chocolate chip cookies today after I was like 'don't do that! I'm on a diet!' But then I told her to make em anyways since I have self control and she wanted them. They came out like a very thin sheet of cookies and were burnt and some were ok, others horrible. I asked her to show me the recipe and it looked normal, and then she said: 'Ill admit it seems weird that it only called for 2 Tbs of flour...' Recipe: 1 cup PLUS 2 Tbs flour Yep.
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Jan 29, 2014 02:21
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I learned why people say to wear gloves when preparing habeneros, by taking out my contacts 3 hours and several soap washes later and still managing to burn my eyes. Pasta was good though
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Jan 29, 2014 16:19
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After eating chilies in a contest barehanded I went home and masturbated. I couldn't figure out why my spit was not washing off whatever cause my genitals to be on fire.
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Jan 29, 2014 16:38
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Tweek posted:After eating chilies in a contest barehanded I went home and masturbated. I couldn't figure out why my spit was not washing off whatever cause my genitals to be on fire. Now that's what I call a dinner disiaster
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Jan 29, 2014 18:50
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Tweek posted:Thanks for the bukkake link. Yeah, but it was only sarcastic once.
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Jan 29, 2014 21:43
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CzarChasm posted:Yeah, but it was only sarcastic once. On the plus, I learned what bukkake means. I mean, I knew what bukkake meant, but I learned what bukkake means.
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Jan 30, 2014 01:44
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I was doing the (low-sugar, low-carb, high-protein, rather frustrating) Dukan diet a while back and was really craving sweets. I found an American recipe for Dukan-friendly ginger cookies using soya mince as the main ingredient. They were meant to be crunchy and good. I'm in Australia and I couldn't find soya mince anywhere but I found a vegetarian product called Quorn, which is basically tasteless mince made from fungus. I figured it would work pretty much the same but what I ended up with can be described only as squidgy ginger meatcookies. They were quite spicy and sweet but so texturally offputting. But I still ate them all.
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Jan 30, 2014 11:49
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The Door Frame posted:I learned why people say to wear gloves when preparing habeneros, by taking out my contacts 3 hours and several soap washes later and still managing to burn my eyes. Pasta was good though
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Jan 31, 2014 01:40
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Had a near disiaster last night for the super bowl: I made baked buffalo wings for the party and had prepped about 10 pounds of them ahead of time by parboiling them in some chili-spiced water (basically poaching em). They'd been in the fridge for a while to dry off their skin and then were about to go in the oven. As the oven was heating up, new people arrived to the party and I got out of the way so they could put their beers away in the fridge and start getting food. About 5 minutes later I notice some of the wings that I had taken out fridge to put on the baking trays had disappeared! I run out into the living room to see a couple of the people eating cold, boiled, unseasoned, unsauced chicken wings.  Fortunately, the wings were cooked through completely and no one got sick but I was still mortified! I was able to explain what happened and got them crisped up and sauced wings in a bit and they were much happier. 
Doh004 fucked around with this message at 20:43 on Feb 3, 2014 |
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Feb 3, 2014 16:59
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Tweek posted:After eating chilies in a contest barehanded I went home and masturbated. I couldn't figure out why my spit was not washing off whatever cause my genitals to be on fire. Oh god I've done that One time when I was a wee crunch, I attempted to generate fudge. I'm not entirely certain how I managed it, but I wound up with a brown tile of dental porcelain. I'm pretty sure it was one big sugar crystal. We tried getting it out of the pan by soaking it, scrubbing it, and shooting it with a goddamned bear rifle but nothing.
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Feb 3, 2014 18:20
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Late last year I got a Whipping Siphon. You know, those stainless steel pressure vessels that take CO2 or N2O cartridges to make foam or carbonate things? Yeeeaaaaahhhhhhh. Thanksgiving My first use of it was on Thanksgiving. My mother, being helpful, brought some 'leftover' Manufacturer's Cream. Now, regular heavy whipping cream is something like 36% fat. Manufacturer's Cream is double that, ~65% fat. So, we try to make sweetened vanilla cream, adding sugar and vanilla to a load of the instant arterial hardener, and pressurize the sucker. Shake, Shake, Shake. Invert over first guest's dessert. Squeeze the lever to open the valve to dispense out the nozzle. BBBBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOO High velocity slightly foamed milk-fat shoots out the nozzle, hits the plate and sends a cone shaped splatter fifteen feet across table, guests, furniture, wall, and dog. Pie slice blown off plate and across table. Stunned guests say nothing while we frantically clean up. Dog is still sticky. Luckily after the initial violent discharge the rest of the dessert topping comes out nicely. For the record, the manual for the siphon recommends using cream of no more than 40% fat. A Few Days Later Fast forward a few days. Sick of seeing the container in the fridge, mocking us, we decide to dump it. Now we know better than to just unscrew it while it is pressurized, so we invert over a container and squeeze the trigger to dispense what is left. Very little comes out and it seems there is no more gas/pressure left. Fantastic, to the sink! Unscrew, unscrew. BLAMMO Yours truly is covered from the waist up in whipped cream. Wall and ceiling behind/above me are splattered. Window and motherfucking blinds in front of me are well coated from that which ricocheted off of the sink and me. Wife looks at me and leaves the room, announcing she will return when there is no remnant of cream on any kitchen surface. A New Experiment Figuring that my lessons are learned with whipping siphons, I decided that it would be fun to try to carbonate some fruit. Strawberries were procured. After some reading up on the best way to carbonate fruit, we prepped like this: Strawberries were cut in half and loaded. Some water and sugar were added, since it sounded like fruits would carbonate better in water than dry. Put it all together, charge with two CO2 cartridges and leave in fridge for a few hours. Great, no explosions and all went well. Again, knowing not to unscrew while under pressure, I went to vent vent the air from the headspace. since its just gas, I figured it was safe to pull the trigger and vent the gas. Boy was I wrong! Trigger pulled, geyser of sweet, sticky, carbonated strawberry juice gushes forth, covering a roughly five foot oval on the ceiling and everything below. Wife and child leave to go do 'something' while I clean, dog now really sticky. Lots of cleaning ensues. Several hours later when everything was clean, I vented the unit into the sink and we all enjoyes some really fizzy, kind of mushy strawberries. I have not used the whipping siphon since. Anyone have any tips on how to use these without coating everything in a fifteen foot radius would be greatly appreciated.
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Feb 4, 2014 17:09
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PopeCrunch posted:Oh god I've done that I did simiar once, but caught my mistake (I had forgotten one element), as it was starting to form those crystals. I determined that I had started making toffee (jury is still out), so my fudge had pieces of toffee in it, and everyome told me it was the best fudge ever.
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Feb 4, 2014 17:12
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PopeCrunch posted:We tried getting it out of the pan by soaking it, scrubbing it, and shooting it with a goddamned bear rifle but nothing. It must be nice to live in Alaska where that is considered an acceptable kitchen instrument. 
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Feb 4, 2014 17:14
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Made french onion soup at work for restaurant week. After caramelizing 150 lbs of onions, I accidentally put about four times the garlic into the onions. This was 45 hours into my work week, middle of the fourth of six days. Made the soup, in it's entirety, chicken stock, veal demi, bouquet, etc. Tasted like fire. LOTS OF WASTED MONEY! Ironsolid fucked around with this message at 20:23 on Feb 4, 2014 |
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Feb 4, 2014 20:20
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Ultimate Mango posted:Explosions This is incredible.
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Feb 4, 2014 20:25
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Ironsolid posted:Made french onion soup at work for restaurant week. After caramelizing 150 lbs of onions, I accidentally put about four times the garlic into the onions. This was 45 hours into my work week, middle of the fourth of six days. Made the soup, in it's entirety, chicken stock, veal demi, bouquet, etc. I once did that with hummus. It mellowed out after a few days. Ironsolid posted:veal demi Oh, you poor bastard. 
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Feb 4, 2014 20:53
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I ended up taking 2 bunches of parsley per pot, and steeping the parsley in the soup. It removed a LOT of the burning garlic flavor. Afterwards I added another 50 lbs of caramelized onions, stretched it with MORE veal demi and chicken stock and re did the bouquet garnis. To my surprise this --- MOSTLY fixed it. We were able to use it through restaurant week, and we still have about 2 gallons left. Let's just say the regional chef tasted it and couldn't tell (Or at least, he didn't say anything). But I sure could. Still that aftertaste of garlic. Maybe he just liked the garlic, but god drat I'll never puree garlic again. Tweek posted:It mellowed out after a few days. Wish my project would have mellowed out. But hell, it sells. I have a hard enough time eating cooked eggs, this would murder my stomach. Oh man, I can feel the oncoming diarrhea. Ironsolid fucked around with this message at 21:51 on Feb 4, 2014 |
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Feb 4, 2014 21:48
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Ironsolid posted:Oh man, I can feel the oncoming diarrhea. Also a popular topping for rice.
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Feb 4, 2014 22:12
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Tweek posted:Also a popular topping for rice. In most cultures that's called curry
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Feb 4, 2014 22:16
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pandaK posted:In most cultures that's called curry Is that what that is? Paging dino.
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Feb 4, 2014 22:51
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Tweek posted:Is that what that is? Paging dino. Leave me out of this. In the South, curry means dry-cooked veg. It's the northerners who poop on their food, add sugar, add cream, and basically make it this stewy messy poo poo.
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Feb 5, 2014 22:19
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Doh004 posted:This is incredible. Let's call them rapid depressurizations. They didn't actually explode, just vented material under high pressure either from the nozzle or through the threaded neck. Google has failed me in finding actual helpful information on using an ISI without having it spew contents everywhere.
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Feb 5, 2014 22:21
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dino. posted:Leave me out of this. In the South, curry means dry-cooked veg. It's the northerners who poop on their food, add sugar, add cream, and basically make it this stewy messy poo poo. Really? Because I got a jar of something called, "curry powder", and it certainly smelt of diarrhea.
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Feb 5, 2014 22:40
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Tweek posted:"curry powder", Anything called curry powder belongs in this thread.
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Feb 6, 2014 00:11
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SymmetryrtemmyS posted:Anything called curry powder belongs in this thread. I was joking by the way, I ain't have such a jar. It may belong in this thread, but it don't belong in my kitchen.
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Feb 6, 2014 00:18
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SymmetryrtemmyS posted:Anything called curry powder belongs in this thread. No it belongs on a bratwurst with ketchup.
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Feb 6, 2014 02:04
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Atticus_1354 posted:No it belongs on a bratwurst with ketchup. Just about this. When I make curried stuff, I make a fresh blend right there, and it hasn't failed yet. (North and South Indian, Thai, Chinese) But I keep a thing of curry for the wurst.
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Feb 6, 2014 03:04
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Missing Name posted:Just about this. When I make curried stuff, I make a fresh blend right there, and it hasn't failed yet. (North and South Indian, Thai, Chinese) Curry powder is mainly turmeric with some other spices. You can make your own...
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Feb 6, 2014 03:41
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SymmetryrtemmyS posted:You can make your own... Would it curry your favor if we did?
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Feb 6, 2014 04:02
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Tweek posted:Really? Because I got a jar of something called, "curry powder", and it certainly smelt of diarrhea.
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Feb 6, 2014 04:32
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dino. posted:I know it's a joke, but for the record, we don't actually use curry powder in India. Isn't curry powder just already mixed Cumin, Mustard Seed, Chili Powder, and Coriander (gently caress Tumeric 4 eva)? Why are people making fun of it, is it bad to have that? Is it bad because it's preground and therefore not as fresh and tasty and roastable?
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Feb 6, 2014 05:02
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Drifter posted:Isn't curry powder just already mixed Cumin, Mustard Seed, Chili Powder, and Coriander (gently caress Tumeric 4 eva)? It's bad because it usually tastes like cardboard. If you grind spices, put them in a jar, and leave them in your cupboard for a decade, they're going to taste like poo poo.
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Feb 6, 2014 05:06
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Drifter posted:(gently caress Tumeric 4 eva) I want you to remember that I gave you a chance to that that back.
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Feb 6, 2014 05:11
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Tumeric definitely adds flavor, not just color.
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Feb 6, 2014 05:14
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Missing Name posted:Tumeric definitely adds flavor, not just color. The flavor is hard to describe, but I love turmeric heavy dishes. It's like an earthy citrus.
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Feb 6, 2014 05:24
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Ultimate Mango posted:Let's call them rapid depressurizations. They didn't actually explode, just vented material under high pressure either from the nozzle or through the threaded neck. http://www.cookingissues.com/2010/08/11/infusion-profusion-game-changing-fast-%E2%80%98n-cheap-technique/ I think it might have been overfilled in those fantastic stories. I have one and it's always done a great job (for infusing and for whipped cream/syllabub). Let me tell you about infusing chocolate vodka with fresh-cracked peppercorns. Also, butterscotch schnappes with fresh rosemary.
Splizwarf fucked around with this message at 05:34 on Feb 6, 2014 |
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Feb 6, 2014 05:31
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