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HUNDU THE BEAST GOD
Sep 14, 2007

everything is yours


khwarezm posted:

I thought the last planet of the Apes film was better than it had any right to be vv. If you add in remakes of old TV programs you get another slew of lovely films, i.e The lone ranger, Dark shadows, land of the lost and the last airbender.

Whoa, hang on a second. Land of the Lost owns. I actually don't think The Lone Ranger is that bad either.

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SuperMechagodzilla
Jun 9, 2007
Probation
Can't post for 28 days!


We had an hard-R Robocop remake called Gamer and y'all didn't watch it, so now we can't have good things.

However, it seems like people are mistaking what this film is about. Robocop 1 was obviously about a cop being rebuilt into a cyborg. This Robocop, however, is about Robocop being remade into a better, dumber Robocop. Like literally, there's dialogue about how how Robo needs to be redesigned into something 'modern', black-painted, decked out in tacticlol greebles, kept PG-13 in the media, etc. Clearly the slick, artificial look of the film is 'on purpose' - the question being of course how subversive this is.

Everyone who's seen the original Robocop hopefully realizes that the 'happy ending' is a bit of a sham. (Should I spoiler this?) Murphy believes he's regained his humanity, but he's still just a robot with a human face - his freedom consists of having a newer, kinder master. The nice-guy CEO. This remake seems to start at this point. Keaton plays the Jobsy cool guy at a more open, decentralized, well-marketed OCP - and Murphy thinks he's human the whole time.

So, here's how I predict it'll go down: after a middle segment of annoyingly PG-13 sanitized violence, Robocop gradually realizes that Steve Jobs hasn't really made him free at all. So he will assert himself by becoming increasingly 80s - he'll change the paint job back to silver, ramp up the inappropriate violence somewhat, etc. Basically fanservice. The line about the triumph of the human spirit from the trailer is undoubtedly ironic, because the film is most likely about a nostalgic regression back to the Reagan era.

My main issue is that this is not dissimilar from already-existing films like Live Free Or Die Hard, so they're going to have to do a lot to differentiate themselves. More than most people, I'm a big fan of the Thing prequel, Terminator Salvation, Transformers and such. Those films are already a few steps ahead of the base concept.

You also have those satirical films like Gamer, District 9, Rob Zombie's Halloweens, Watchmen, and Universal Soldier: Day Of Reckoning, which are both awesome and extremely violent.

And then you have just really brutal Pg-13 films like War Of The Worlds and Battle: Los Angeles...

The basic target here seems to be Tron: Legacy, but Tron: Legacy was itself self-aware and 'about' being trapped in a corporate franchise. So exactly which films are being commented on here?

SuperMechagodzilla fucked around with this message at Sep 16, 2013 around 17:09

computer parts
Nov 18, 2010

PLEASE CLAP

WarLocke posted:

I think he meant the Mark Wahlberg Planet of the Apes anyway. With the space station and Ape Washington DC and all.

That was more than a decade ago and if you're judging based on that context I can say "Superhero movies are still uniformly terrible".

WarLocke
Jun 6, 2004

You are being watched.


computer parts posted:

That was more than a decade ago and if you're judging based on that context I can say "Superhero movies are still uniformly terrible".

Idunno, ask him if he is I guess?

boar guy
Jan 25, 2007


I did mean that one but I don't see why a remake being more than 5 years old means it gets a pass on being terrible?

khwarezm
Oct 26, 2010

Deal with it.

WarLocke posted:

I think he meant the Mark Wahlberg Planet of the Apes anyway. With the space station and Ape Washington DC and all.

I meant Rise, though its funny you say that since I totally forgot the Mark Wahlberg version existed!

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD posted:

Whoa, hang on a second. Land of the Lost owns. I actually don't think The Lone Ranger is that bad either.

I can't speak for individual people's opinions on these movies but they were roundly trashed by critics and didn't exactly set the box office on fire either.

khwarezm fucked around with this message at Sep 16, 2013 around 18:19

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD
Sep 14, 2007

everything is yours


What the hell? Rise is clearly the best Planet of the Apes movie that isn't the original.

WarLocke
Jun 6, 2004

You are being watched.


HUNDU THE BEAST GOD posted:

What the hell? Rise is clearly the best Planet of the Apes movie that isn't the original.

Yeah, I have to agree with this. I'd place it above the sequels (original sequels?) even.

khwarezm
Oct 26, 2010

Deal with it.

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD posted:

What the hell? Rise is clearly the best Planet of the Apes movie that isn't the original.

WarLocke posted:

Yeah, I have to agree with this. I'd place it above the sequels (original sequels?) even.

There was bit of a communication breakdown, I'm saying I like Rise, but I didn't expect to.

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD
Sep 14, 2007

everything is yours


Oh. Phew! I'm always surprised when someone doesn't like that movie.

Gr3y
Jul 29, 2003


khwarezm posted:

I can't speak for individual people's opinions on these movies but they were roundly trashed by critics and didn't exactly set the box office on fire either.
America wasn't ready for Will Ferrell mugging to CGI dinomonsters in a bizarre dadaist time/space hell. The blame lies with us, not the movie.

computer parts
Nov 18, 2010

PLEASE CLAP

Efexeye posted:

I did mean that one but I don't see why a remake being more than 5 years old means it gets a pass on being terrible?

Because a lot can change in 10 years (or hell, even 5)?

teagone
Jun 10, 2003

Valyrian, motherfucker! Do you speak it?!

While I don't really care if remakes are good or bad (RoboCop is one of my favorite movies of all time), I agree with several points made in this video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xgZFcP7N6ZM

Even if this remake sucks, I still have my original

Rhyno
Mar 22, 2003

Coach Bloodshot
Default Status: SHOUTING


One of the best parts of past Robocop threads is all the behind the scenes info we've gotten about the previous films and shows. I always laugh when I see Prime Directives and Robocop is shorter than his grown son by several inches. If memory serves they took a hacksaw to the suit to make it fit the actor?

Young Freud
Nov 25, 2006



teagone posted:

While I don't really care if remakes are good or bad (RoboCop is one of my favorite movies of all time), I agree with several points made in this video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xgZFcP7N6ZM

The problem with I have with this video is that it's becomes very clear that her love of Robocop is motivated by nostalgia. Not that I don't love the original for the same reasons, but nostalgia can be blinding. She brings up The Fly and it's remake and then brings up Weller's somewhat disapproval, but I can remember that Vincent Price hated Cronenberg's version, feeling turned off by the graphic violence and feeling it missed the point. Roger Ebert disliked the Carpenter remake of The Thing on release, feeling that the goriness was unnecessary "because this material has been done before, and better, especially in the original 'The Thing'", and that Carpenter had "concentrated on the special effects and the technology and to allow the story and people to become secondary". Tell me if these are not the same criticisms being brought up.

teagone posted:

Even if this remake sucks, I still have my original

That's really the important thing to remember, when it comes to remakes or adaptations. There's always the original source material, it's not like it's going to go away. I hate Watchmen and V For Vendetta adaptations, but those comic books are still on my shelf.

WarLocke
Jun 6, 2004

You are being watched.


Young Freud posted:

That's really the important thing to remember, when it comes to remakes or adaptations. There's always the original source material, it's not like it's going to go away.

As long as we're not talking about George Lucas stuff and/or Star Wars.

Young Freud
Nov 25, 2006



WarLocke posted:

As long as we're not talking about George Lucas stuff and/or Star Wars.

Yeah, but hopefully we'll see a remastered rerelease of the original theatrical print with no added bullshit since the rights have changed hands.

You could amend that as well for Ridley Scott and Blade Runner.

Rhyno
Mar 22, 2003

Coach Bloodshot
Default Status: SHOUTING


Young Freud posted:

Yeah, but hopefully we'll see a remastered rerelease of the original theatrical print with no added bullshit since the rights have changed hands.

You could amend that as well for Ridley Scott and Blade Runner.

From what I've read, a condition of the sale to Disney is that they can never release the originals again. Lucas kept the only masters. The only sources out there are ancient film cans or VHS and I doubt Disney would use those.

WarLocke
Jun 6, 2004

You are being watched.


Rhyno posted:

From what I've read, a condition of the sale to Disney is that they can never release the originals again. Lucas kept the only masters. The only sources out there are ancient film cans or VHS and I doubt Disney would use those.

Wow, even after selling over the rights he has to twist that knife just to spite everyone, huh?

LeJackal
Apr 4, 2011
Probation
Can't post for 25 days!


WarLocke posted:

Wow, even after selling over the rights he has to twist that knife just to spite everyone, huh?

Its mostly to spite his former wife, who acted as editor for the originals. She can't get a dime for the 'Special Editions'.

spikenigma
Nov 13, 2005

by Ralp


drat, most things are so 'plasticy' these days.

I can't find many meaningful moments. Like in Robo-2 where Robo reclaims some of his humanity as the drug kingpin kid dies in his arms reaching out for the father he never had with murphy as a surrogate. Poignant stuff.

I can't see that getting past a focus group in favour of more explosions or a super-obvious-for-the-audience-we-have-no-respect-for "HUD says: I'm feeling saaaad".

spikenigma fucked around with this message at Sep 18, 2013 around 13:47

Shanty
Nov 7, 2005

I Love Dogs


"What is this?
A Robocop movie for ANTS???"

Terror Sweat
Mar 15, 2009



LeJackal posted:

Its mostly to spite his former wife, who acted as editor for the originals. She can't get a dime for the 'Special Editions'.

Hahahaha thats hilarious

AlternateAccount
Apr 25, 2005
FYGM

Terror Sweat posted:

Hahahaha thats hilarious

Well until you realize that the consensus basically is that she made Star Wars something good out of a pile of poo poo that Lucas shot. You could just about say she's more responsible for his success than he is.

SALT CURES HAM
Jan 3, 2011


What's wrong with just rereleasing the 1997 Special Editions then? If I remember correctly those barely changed anything aside from touching up a few effects.

Steve Yun
Aug 7, 2003

I
ANALYZE
CARTOONS


Grimey Drawer

The 1997 editions are most of the problem. 2004 and later editions have some minor improvements over the 1997 versions but they're mostly the same.

...of SCIENCE!
Apr 26, 2008

43 species of parrot?! Nipples for men?! SLUGS?! Are we not in the hands of a lunatic?! If I were creating the world I wouldn't mess about with butterflies and daffodils. I would have started with lasers, 8 o'clock, day one!


Terror Sweat posted:

Hahahaha thats hilarious

It's also a complete myth.

Corek
May 11, 2013

SMG Macklemore Fanclub

...of SCIENCE! posted:

It's also a complete myth.

It makes no sense if you think about it. All she was was one of three editors on Star Wars and one of three on Return of the Jedi, and I doubt the editors of any release are still paid 30 years later.

Payndz
Sep 22, 2006

They smelled of pubs, and Wormwood Scrubs, and too many right-wing meetings.

So I twatted them with a magic yo-yo. Because, hell, why not?


It's probably more to do with her being married to Lucas at the time she helped salvage his movie than just that she worked on it. (If there's any truth to the story at all.)

Cardboard Box A
Jul 18, 2004

Please grab the extinguisher


Grimey Drawer

"It's great to see american machines promoting peace abroad! But why are we so robophobic of machines at home?"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DbP4Ky5TUO0

Now that's closer to the Robocop satire we know and love

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD
Sep 14, 2007

everything is yours


I said the same thing when the original trailer came out - it looks like they're trying to make a talky rear end movie seem action packed, which makes me hopeful. Note that pretty much everything in this trailer action-wise was in the previous trailer.

Rageaholic Monkey
May 31, 2005

"What do you fear
most in the world?"

"The possibility that
love is not enough."


Yeah that line was pretty great. But the rest of the trailer still seemed overly serious. Hopefully that's just a sterotypically designed trailer and the actual movie will be more unique. But it's hard to tell from that 2 minutes.

Steve Yun
Aug 7, 2003

I
ANALYZE
CARTOONS


Grimey Drawer

The paintings on the wall behind Michael Keaton were great

Brown Moses
Feb 22, 2002


Steve Yun posted:

The paintings on the wall behind Michael Keaton were great

Francis Bacon did love to put lumps of twisted flesh in cages.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010
ASK ME ABOUT MY SELF-PUBLISHED WARHAMMER FANFICTION AND MY KNIFE COLLECTION


Rageaholic Monkey posted:

Yeah that line was pretty great. But the rest of the trailer still seemed overly serious.

The original is completely serious, or at least played completely straight, that's what makes it work so well as a parody.

Dr. Lariat
Jul 1, 2004

by Lowtax


C'mon whoevers behind this movie, an Imax release? I'm trying to hate and avoid this film, your new, better trailer and Imax tag are weakening my resolve.

Rageaholic Monkey
May 31, 2005

"What do you fear
most in the world?"

"The possibility that
love is not enough."


Snowman_McK posted:

The original is completely serious, or at least played completely straight, that's what makes it work so well as a parody.
True. Okay, maybe serious was the wrong word choice. I meant gritty and grimdark.

ghostwritingduck
Aug 26, 2004

"I hope you like waking up at 6 a.m. and having your favorite things destroyed. P.S. Forgive me because I'm cuter than that $50 wire I just ate."


HUNDU THE BEAST GOD posted:

I said the same thing when the original trailer came out - it looks like they're trying to make a talky rear end movie seem action packed, which makes me hopeful. Note that pretty much everything in this trailer action-wise was in the previous trailer.

The action looked more satisfying in this trailer. I have a feeling reactions will depend on how highly people hold the original. I predict that huge fans will probably hate this, while other people will probably enjoy it.

computer parts
Nov 18, 2010

PLEASE CLAP

Rageaholic Monkey posted:

True. Okay, maybe serious was the wrong word choice. I meant gritty and grimdark.

I mean aside from hammy poo poo like "Bitches leave" that's how the original was too.

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LeJackal
Apr 4, 2011
Probation
Can't post for 25 days!


computer parts posted:

I mean aside from hammy poo poo like "Bitches leave" that's how the original was too.

Hammy? That was genius! Part of the draw was in how Smith look and played as Boddicker - and that line from that scene is a brilliant encapsulation of his character.

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