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JackDRipper
Feb 13, 2013

Its all about the Fishing.

RFC2324 posted:

I was really hoping you were reading through the thread opening replies in new tabs so we could enjoy random replies to posts from years ago.

I can drink enough this next weekend and do just that.

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Judge Schnoopy
Nov 2, 2005

dont even TRY it, pal

MF_James posted:

Looking at other people's code is like staring into the abyss.

Hey I commented everything perfectly on the dev build! Then I refactored and had to rewrite all the comments, so they were a little less flushed out. Then a core requirement in the scope changed, a version or two went by, another refactor, and bug fixes after test deployment.

None of the comments were accurate so I deleted them all. I figured the code would change again so I didn't write new comments, but then it was packaged and delivered as final.

Totally not my fault my code has no comments.

dogstile
May 1, 2012

fucking clocks
how do they work?


The best bit of code i've ever written I did while blackout drunk. I spent the night before at a party, got convinced to have a drink, ended up drinking until 5am, then decided "gently caress it, i'm not gonna sleep" and drank through my college classes.

According to everyone else I was very quiet (i was probably too scared to talk in case i'd get thrown out) but the code I wrote worked and didn't have a billion wasted lines of dumb poo poo.

I also didn't comment it.

gently caress.

I'm usually not able to program without asking for a ton of help because i'm an idiot

xThrasheRx
Jul 12, 2005

Surrealistic

xzzy posted:

Anyone who doubts this needs to work with python's datetime module for a while. After a few hours you'll be converting everything to UTC just so you can compare timestamps without wanting to stab yourself.



Have a big local customer which wanted things our local time _because_. All sorts of headaches regarding Elastic stack since they are super hard on the "No, UTC only, if you are using anything else, change that"

Bigass Moth
Mar 6, 2004

I joined the #RXT REVOLUTION.

he knows...


I get so pissed when I see comments that are like “temporary!!!!” Or “do not remove!” With no additional documentation.

BaronVonVaderham
Jul 31, 2011

At the beginning of your upkeep, draw a card if it was illegitimate.

My favorite comment was discovered in the bowels of legacy code at my last job. "TODO: Find a better way to do this."

I checked, and that comment had been added over two years prior and it was doing some really shady raw SQL poo poo that turned out to be the root cause of a half dozen bugs in the backlog.

pixaal
Jan 8, 2004

All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

Bigass Moth posted:

I get so pissed when I see comments that are like “temporary!!!!” Or “do not remove!” With no additional documentation.

I find that "DO NOT REMOVE" is not from the person that wrote that code, but from someone else who found it, thought it was doing nothing removed it and the entire thing broke horribly. They then failed to figure out what it was doing before giving up and just leaving it. There's also generally something wrong that makes you think maybe it's that bit of code so you're going to trace an error to it over and over again until someone finally figures out just what that does.

Kyrosiris
May 24, 2006

You try to be happy when everyone is summoning you everywhere to "be their friend".

BaronVonVaderham posted:

My favorite comment was discovered in the bowels of legacy code at my last job. "TODO: Find a better way to do this."

I checked, and that comment had been added over two years prior and it was doing some really shady raw SQL poo poo that turned out to be the root cause of a half dozen bugs in the backlog.

This feels like a really big metaphor for life.

Schadenboner
Aug 15, 2011



Kyrosiris posted:

This feels like a really big metaphor for life.

It would be a better metaphor if the guy Karoshi’ed a week after making that comment.

dogstile
May 1, 2012

fucking clocks
how do they work?


My IRL todo list would probably make my life better if i just did it, so it's pretty apt imo

Sirotan
Oct 17, 2006

Sirotan is a seal.


College Slice

poo poo pissing some poor SOB off: Some kind of explosive lying on the floor of server room?



Schadenboner
Aug 15, 2011




So, what you need to do is make sure the clockwork for the detonation inhibitor is still working. Get real close to the device and see if you hear a ticking (like from an old wristwatch). If you don't, find a baseball bat or something and whack the nose (front) of the device until you start hearing that.

Please post results, I'm very worried for you!

JackDRipper
Feb 13, 2013

Its all about the Fishing.


I know what this is, this is a snow cone maker.

The Macaroni
Dec 20, 2002
...it does nothing.

At my wife's new hire orientation, they told a risk management story that involved someone opening up a filing cabinet and finding a grenade.

The grenade's pin had been pulled. (Edit: this was an army base, but still.)

pixaal
Jan 8, 2004

All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

Schadenboner posted:

So, what you need to do is make sure the clockwork for the detonation inhibitor is still working. Get real close to the device and see if you hear a ticking (like from an old wristwatch). If you don't, find a baseball bat or something and whack the nose (front) of the device until you start hearing that.

Please post results, I'm very worried for you!



Turns out it was a bomb according to the op of that thread

https://www.reddit.com/r/whatisthisthing/comments/8kzx5p/some_kind_of_explosive_lying_on_the_floor_of/dzbu0dm posted:

Update #2:

Owner has no idea what it is or how it got there, there is a millitary warehouse few kilometers away with defunct BVPs nad V3Ss. Calling cops.

Update #3: 14:30 CET

Bomb squad is on the way, we are ordered to evacuate the building and leave the premises. Will update when they'll get here.

Update #4: 14:50 CET

Bomb Squad in the bulding: Police want to confiscate our phones and stuff for pics maybe? Hope I am not in trouble for posting that pic.

Update #5: 15:03 CET

Mobile phone confiscated, updating from notebook. We have been escorted maybe 2 kilometers away to some parking lot with police escort. We have to wait for a police interrogation. They are really not cool about it.

Update #6: 15:16 CET

Just heard from police radio. It is a freaking active bomb, live explosive, not inert or whatever is the correct loving wording for it in english.

Update #7: 15:32 CET

Bomb squad will try to remove the device if it is not wired and transport it to some safer place, we are on our way to a police station. Some black vans with no registration plates on the scene, few military cars. It looks like a complete military lockdown. Crazy stuff...

Thanks Ants
May 21, 2004

I am quite pissed at my fat man avatar.
I am too politically correct to say this out loud though.
I yearn for a reason to exist.
Help.


Fun Shoe

Haha how the gently caress

Sirotan
Oct 17, 2006

Sirotan is a seal.


College Slice

xzzy
Mar 5, 2009

wakey wakey to
this bowl of tasty


Yams Fan


Finally a use for windows defragger.

The Macaroni
Dec 20, 2002
...it does nothing.

Less-explosive poo poo pissing me off:

Nov 2017 - We start planning a major transition of an old process into a new system. It's a brand new world, and we have a blank slate to design the new process (within system constraints). I point out that I did this exact same project in my previous job, outline several pitfalls I encountered and eventually overcame, and suggest a strategy. Boss and clients overrule me and instead design a grotesque, needlessly complex system that requires daily admin-side work to keep running. It's confusing to users, the clients are unhappy, and oh did I mention that the data provided to us by the clients was faulty?

March 2018: We go live. Tier 2 tickets increase by about 300%, directly related to this project.

May 2018: We all agree that an overhaul is needed for FY2019. I again delicately point out that we might try a strategy that I have experience with.

I am again overruled by boss, who proposes a variation on the current system. My proposal has 11 objects, the boss' has over 600. This will be fun.

Burning_Monk
Jan 11, 2005
Mad, Bad, and Dangerous to know


Just had a interview with a potential CTO for my company. It started getting pretty hilarious, and I was stifling a laugh, when every time there was something this guy didn't know he would just say "well I would toss it up to the cloud." Not "we'll use the cloud" or "lets find a cloud solution" it was always "tossing it to the cloud" like he was playing basketball with servers and databases.

Still not as bad as the guy with the 6 page resume, with reference links to more pages. You know you have OCD when your resume has a glossary and table of contents.

Sickening
Jul 15, 2007

Black Summer was the best summer.



I feel like that should be making the news wherever it is.

Schadenboner
Aug 15, 2011



Sickening posted:

I feel like that should be making the news wherever it is.

Sounds like it's the former Jugoslavia so this is probably just a Monday for them?

E: Yup, that's the rear end-end of an AT-3 which (in addition to extremely wide use by Eastern Bloc forces) was used on the BVP, a number of which were stored nearby. That's probably where it came from?

Schadenboner fucked around with this message at May 21, 2018 around 14:54

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xzzy
Mar 5, 2009

wakey wakey to
this bowl of tasty


Yams Fan

No, Mondays are attempts at insurance fraud caught on dash cams. Bombs are a humpday activity, gets the heart rate up.

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