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CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




LOCUST FART HELL posted:

In our new thread tonight, the Simpsons Quote Thread finally gets the chance to show off the full range of their posting. Unfortunately, one goon didn't want that chance and refused to participate. But thanks to some creative account naming, you won't even notice. Show us what you got, TV IV!

So we just transplant the thread? We're just going to trash the new thread too.

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CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Skeesix posted:

A man with plenty of quotes is LESS likely to be a quotery dealer

Hold up... Maybe those quotes are medicinal.

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Cookie Kwan posted:

No you shut up!

If they're not having a go with the birds, they're having a row with the wankers!

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Funky See Funky Do posted:

The OP has no decency. He called me "Monkey See Monkey Do"!

All this time I've been calling her Crandall!

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




LOCUST FART HELL posted:

Owww! Is that a new kind of mace? It's really painful!

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007





They should have called this thread Johnny Deformed!

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Hogburto posted:

And Apu Nahasa... pasa... well just Moe, just Moe.

Hogburto de Beaumarchais!

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Cookie Kwan posted:

Failure is so dangerous. Just look at Roark's teeth!



I need the biggest screenshot you have!













No, that's too big.

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Drink-Mix Man posted:

The script might even work if you got rid of the talking pie.

And that talking pie was really just a talking dog!

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Luigi Thirty posted:

I hate having parties. The toilet always gets backed up.

Who's playing that music? And where's all that liquor coming fom?

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Drink-Mix Man posted:

Do you like pina colonics, and getting caught in the rain?
Passing out in the ocean...


If you like refund adjustments,
And the music I play,
Send a check to my friend Ralph,
And he'll mail you a tape!

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Vicissitude posted:

Don't say revenge, don't say revenge...

Uh... revenge.

That's it, I'm outta here.

But why wound his body with bullets when I could set his soul afire with a slanderous mambo?

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007





CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




ebilflindas posted:

Das ist nicht eine boobie!

ebilflindas, do you know what Schadenfreude is?

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Drink-Mix Man posted:

Notice I no longer say "libary" or "tommorry."

I'll be teaching your goon riding, grooming, and at no extra charge, pronunciation.

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Drink-Mix Man posted:

Come on, Locust. It's like kissing a peanut!

Overflowing with the oil and salt of its departed brothers?

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




BloodDesk UnderHell posted:

Couldn't Itchy share his pie with Scratchy? Then they would both have pie!

Now BloodDesk, don't you eat this pie!

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




ShaqDiesel posted:

Well here we are, the star of The Blue Lagoon, and me, a blue haired goon... what the?

It's not your fault, ShaqDiesel. It's these lousy quoters. They make madder than a... yak in heat!

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




DrBouvenstein posted:

You know that feeling you get when a thousand knives of fire are stabbing you in the heart?

I got that right now...

Ooh, bacon!

That's guilt. You feel guilty because your stunt wound up costing a man his job.

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Jorghnassen posted:

We sell forbidden objects from places men fear to tread. We also sell frozen yogurt, which I call "Frogurt"!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOx09eKybDg

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




CatchrNdRy posted:

you missed the best part, when Bart starts "Can we..." and then stops short due to Lisa's commanding hand gesture


They swore they'd get us back by spiking our water supply. But they didn't have the guts.

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




DrBouvenstein posted:

Oh, I'm not a doctor.

This is probably the third time I've made this quote...and I'm ok with that.

For all the latest medical poop
Call Surgeon General C. Everett Bouvenstein

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Sanguinia posted:

Maybe if I fiddle with these knobs...

Wait! Don't panic -- remember the advice your father gave you on your wedding day!

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




MondayHotDog posted:

I'm aware of his work.

I am familiar with the works of Pablo Neruda.

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Hogburto posted:

We now return to "Blood on the Blackboard: The Bart Simpson story"! Starring Richard Chamberlain as Principal Skinner, Joe Montegna as Fat Tony, Jane Seymour as the woman he loved, and TV's Doogie Howser, Neil Patrick Harris, as Bart Simpson!

Oh, maybe TV is right. TV's always right!

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007





Your husband's work is what we call "outsider art". It could be by a mental patient, or a hillbilly, or a chimpanzee.

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Drink-Mix Man posted:

Oh, gee, a joke. Um... Um... Uh, funny, uh, okay. Uh, this guy walks into a bar and takes out a tiny piano and a twelve-inch pianist. Oh hoho, no, wait! I can't tell THAT one!

I used to do a lot of tumbling in my act, but I'm phasing it out for more dirty limericks: "There once was a man named Enis..."

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Cookie Kwan posted:

"Well dear, you always wanted a compact"

Ain't that the truth!

In over 15 pages, we have never had a female quoter. But that seems to be the way the wind is blowing these days. After all, we have female singers, female motorists...

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Do over Ham posted:

Explain how.


Do over Ham posted:

Needs more dog.


Do Over Ham, we've talked about you hogging all the quotes...

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Everything Counts posted:

Years of exposure to radiation has given me this otherworldly glow, and has left me as sterile as a Nevada boxing commissioner.

By the power vested in my by the state gaming commission, I pronounce you man and wife. Here's ten dollars worth of chips. You may kiss the bride.

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




DrBouvenstein posted:

I was really pissed with the Tomaco episode when they just showed up at the Simpsons farm, no damage, despite us seeing it on fire.

Of course, had they included a "lampshade"/"fourth wall" joke about how it burned down, but someone rebuilt it in the same dilapidated state it was in previously, we'd hate that too, so, what I'm trying to say is, it was a motivated seller, and then a handy man's dream.

Not sure if it was cozy, though...

Ah, yeah, well, whenever you notice something like that, a wizard did it.

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Do over Ham posted:

I'm a surfer!


Will you two stop saying "gummi" so much?

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Cookie Kwan posted:

I also fed some ducklings!

Joe Banks, eighty-two years young, has come to this pond every day for the past seventeen years to feed the ducks. But last month Joe made a discovery. The ducks...were gone. Some say the ducks went to Canada. Others say, Toronto.

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Do over Ham posted:

Will you two stop saying "gummi" so much?
Well, I got everything I was supposed to get. I'm not going to buy any gummi bears, though... that quote had absolutely no effect on me whatsoever.

I saw some Haribo at the grocery store, and remembered this quote... then ended up buying some

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Cookie Kwan posted:

We tried to flush Jerusalem down the toilet, but he got stuck and now we have to feed him.

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Luigi Thirty posted:

No bowl, stick! Stick!

If you really wanted us to be neater, you'd serve us out of one long bowl!

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007





Oh, it's just Bart and a mysterious stranger!

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




Cookie Kwan posted:

What do you think Bjay9 is doing in there?

CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




MondayHotDog posted:

Shut up, brain, or I'll stab you with a q-tip!

No, my ears are really burning. I wanted to see inside so I lit a Q-Tip.

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CharlieFoxtrot
Mar 26, 2007




LOCUST FART HELL posted:

Hey, Drink-Mix Man, you should try one of these smart drinks!



Oh, wow, I've wasted my life!

I don't know where you magic pixies came from...but I like your pixie drink!

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