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TMMadman posted:Uh-oh. We've drawn Judge Ham. He's had it in for me ever since I kinda ran over his dog. Mr. Madman, you're in luck. Your Phil Hartman quote is exactly what I need to rebuild my shattered Simpsons quote thread practice! Care to join me in a belt of Scotch?
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Jul 31, 2015 22:34
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TMMadman posted:Yeah, but I haven't slept in days.  Well, that's just great, TMMadman. We've been out here for less then a day and you've already managed to blow the quote. Sexless freak...
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Aug 1, 2015 16:29
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Root Bear posted:I couldn't see what they looked like, they were too busy probing you. Stop! We have reached the limits of what rectal probing can teach us!
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Aug 3, 2015 16:59
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TMMadman posted:Oh my God! No, the other secret!
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Aug 4, 2015 21:41
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Justin Godscock posted:Oh crap, I shouldn't have said it was a secret. Hey, hey! I paid for this popcorn fair and square!
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Aug 5, 2015 03:59
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TMMadman posted:If you quiet down, I'd be happy to treat you to a garbage bag full of popcorn. You're gonna garnish my celery?! 
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Aug 5, 2015 14:56
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ShaqDiesel posted:Tut, Tut gentle poster. That triumvirate of twinkies merely overwhelmed my resolve.  Oh I don't understand, it all sounds so crazy to me!
BigDave fucked around with this message at 15:21 on Aug 5, 2015 |
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Aug 5, 2015 15:19
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York_M_Chan posted:Look at me, er, uh, Neddy. I am, er, uh, President Kennedy. Do you think they're connected to the Kennedy assassination in some way?
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Aug 5, 2015 17:12
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Do over Ham posted:Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Back up a bit now. When are the pancakes coming in the mail? Hey, these aren't waffles! They're just square pancakes!
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Aug 6, 2015 13:26
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Deviant posted:The waffle iron is in the shop. 
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Aug 6, 2015 20:57
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Monday_ posted:That's not God, that's just a waffle that Jerusalem threw up there. I know I shouldn't eat thee...  Mmm, sacrilicious.
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Aug 6, 2015 22:59
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Do over Ham posted:Here's your giant sub, swimming in vinegar, just the way you like it. I didn't see any UFO!
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Aug 7, 2015 12:52
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IMJack posted:You know that feeling you get when a thousand knives of fire are stabbing you in the heart? I got that right now. Send a ham to his widow.
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Aug 7, 2015 17:59
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Monday_ posted:Smashy smashy! Gas brake honk! Gas brake honk! Honk honk punch! Gas gas gas!
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Aug 10, 2015 00:48
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Jerusalem posted:You look like you could tell me where I could get some tang. Check with the FBI! I have a file! I HAVE A FIIIILLLLEEEE!
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Aug 10, 2015 03:22
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Do over Ham posted:Buenas noches, mein Führer!  Now they'll never save your brain, Hitler! BigDave fucked around with this message at 11:48 on Aug 10, 2015 |
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Aug 10, 2015 11:44
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Root Bear posted:Beer it is! I see you've played knifey-spooney before.
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Aug 10, 2015 19:43
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Jorghnassen posted:Deviant was charged with a violation of penal code section 618A: Wanton Destruction of Precious Antique Cans. Jorghnassen, aka Miguel Sanchez, aka Dr. Nguyen van Thuoc, was paid $8 for his 32 hours of babysitting. He was glad to get it.
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Aug 10, 2015 20:04
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CharlieFoxtrot posted:No refunds, force majeure! Read the back of your tickets! Stamp your hand for re-entry!
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Aug 11, 2015 03:31
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TMMadman posted:Oh dear, send a ham to his widow. TMMadman, are we Jewish?
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Aug 11, 2015 19:51
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IMJack posted:The way I was headed, it was just a matter of time before I wound up in front of a judge. Is that right, Principal Tazmanian?
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Aug 11, 2015 22:02
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Writer Cath posted:So you're saying I'm going to be a failure? Of course you are, Writer Cath. A spectacular failure.
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Aug 12, 2015 14:02
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Writer Cath posted:Are you stalling for time or just senile? I want my fly-fly da-da!
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Aug 13, 2015 13:05
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Boardroom Jimmy posted:Why don't I just give you this pen with my phone number on it. It looks just like a cigar. Isn't that something? It turns into a sponge when you put it in water!
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Aug 17, 2015 18:28
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Hey, Monday, can you help me get this Sugar Daddy off my back?
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Aug 18, 2015 01:42
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IMJack posted:No bathroom, only klavkolosh. Bathroom in tower, tower. Ahh, Flushing Meadows... http://i.imgur.com/qvqjZ.gif
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Aug 19, 2015 01:37
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Tokelau All Star posted:
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Aug 19, 2015 11:26
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Technogeek posted:The Soviet Union? I thought you guys broke up. Yes, that's what we wanted you to think! https://youtu.be/uDXtVlG2VW0  
BigDave fucked around with this message at 15:36 on Aug 19, 2015 |
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Aug 19, 2015 15:31
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IMJack posted:Wait a minute, that wasn't the wallet inspector... Sure, I might offend a few of the moderators with my cocky posts and musky quotings... BigDave fucked around with this message at 11:56 on Aug 20, 2015 |
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Aug 20, 2015 11:54
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Red posted:Well, I believe I'll vote for a third-party candidate! Don't blame me, I voted for Kodos! 
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Aug 21, 2015 17:45
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DizzyBum posted:Your guilty conscience may force you to vote Democratic, but deep down inside you secretly long for a cold-hearted Republican to lower taxes, brutalize criminals, and rule you like a king! I'll be back. You can't keep the Democrats out of the White House forever, and when they get it, I'm back on the streets! WITH ALL MY CRIMINAL BUDDIES! BWAHAHAHAHA!
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Aug 22, 2015 01:23
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Sasha aint ratchet posted:What country is this post from? This post was manufactured in Croatia from recycled Soviet tanks.
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Aug 23, 2015 20:26
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ShaqDiesel posted:Everyone knows rock achieved perfection in 1974. It's a scientific fact. Charlie didn't ask for I.D when I fought at La Choy and Chun King. I saw my best friend's head explode at Margaret Cho!
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Aug 24, 2015 00:11
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Hijo Del Helmsley posted:They're speed holes. They make the car go faster. The same Hijo Del Helmsley who keeps taking pictures of my sister?! 
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Aug 24, 2015 18:02
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Monday_ posted:We've got to start using that cheaper oatmeal. From now on, we use regular toilet paper, not the fancy quilted kind!
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Aug 24, 2015 21:26
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TMMadman posted:And from now on steak night will be chub night. Mmm, snouts...
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Aug 24, 2015 21:33
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TMMadman posted:Mmmm....open faced club sand wedge. Hmmm...crumbled up cookie things.
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Aug 24, 2015 22:13
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Boardroom Jimmy posted:I've got it all figured out. Skeesix can have Do over Ham's crib and Do over Ham'll sleep with us until he's 21. Won't that warp him? 
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Aug 25, 2015 04:05
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The Nastier Nate posted:Well, I've always been a firm believer in the three R's: Reading TV Guide, um...Writing to TV Guide, um...and Renewing TV Guide. Teacher! Mother! Secret lover...
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Aug 25, 2015 14:48
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JohnnyCanuck posted:Saxamaphone. Hey there...blimpie boy...flyin' through the sky so...fancy...free
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Aug 25, 2015 21:30
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