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CharlieFoxtrot posted:They didn't have Lord Huggington? They're basically the same bear, CharlieFoxtrot.
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Jan 9, 2014 06:06
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Writer Cath posted:
Aw, I can't take his money. I can't print my own money. I have to work for my money! Why don't I just lay down and die?!
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Jan 11, 2014 23:30
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Money fight!
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TMMadman posted:Well, if you're talking about root beer, I plead guilt-diddily-ildly as char-diddily-arged! High as a kite, everybody! Goofballs!
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Jan 12, 2014 20:49
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Writer Cath posted:Why is that one Muppet made of leather? Well, it's not quite a mop and it's not quite a puppet... but man oh man  . So to answer your question, I don't know.
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Jan 13, 2014 15:30
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Mister Kingdom posted:Nothing could possi-BLY go wrong. So, Mister Kingdom, you think you're God's gift to women, do you?
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Jan 17, 2014 04:05
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Senior Woodchuck posted:They're really sticking it to that Spiro Agnew guy again. He must work there or something.  Oh, you'll pay! Don't think you won't pay!
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Jan 19, 2014 16:47
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MondayHotDog posted:I move for a bad... court... thingy. That's why you're the judge, and I'm the law... talkin'... guy. 
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Jan 21, 2014 06:07
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BloodDesk UnderHell posted:I sentence you to kiss my rear end! Anger is what makes America great. But you must find the proper outlet for your rage. Fire a weapon at your television screen. Pick a fight with someone weaker than you. Or write a threatening letter to a celebrity. So when you go out for a drive remember to leave your murderous anger where it belongs... at home.
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Jan 25, 2014 06:05
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IMJack posted:Here you go. "Gïf". From Sweden. Needs more dog.
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Feb 3, 2014 06:10
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After The War posted:Do you have diabetes? Well, you do now! That's because I've loaded it with sugar! After The War, our ship has come in! I found five hundred pounds of sugar in the forest that I'm going to sell directly to the consumer! All for a low, low price of $1 per pound. 
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Jul 26, 2014 17:32
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ThNextGreenLantern posted:Up yours, children! When I look at the smiles on all the children's faces, I just know they're about to jab me with something.
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Aug 1, 2014 05:13
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Skeesix posted:They used to call that the uh... Stinga They called me Kid Gorgeous. Later on, it was Kid Presentable. Then Kid Gruesome. And finally, Kid Class3KillStorm.
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Aug 1, 2014 22:32
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Hijo Del Helmsley posted:ACH! My retirement grease! Now if it was up to me, I'd let you go. But the lads have a temper, and they've been drinking all day!
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Aug 2, 2014 16:47
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MondayHotDog posted:I heard that goon's rear end has it's own Congressman. MondayHotDog, the whole reason we have elected officials is so we don't have to think all the time. Just like that rainforest scare a few years back: our officials saw there was a problem and they fixed it, didn't they?
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Aug 2, 2014 23:13
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Do over Ham posted:Drink-Mix Man: His jiggling is almost hypnotic.  WOO-HOO! Look at that blubber fly!
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Aug 3, 2014 03:26
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Drink-Mix Man posted:You didn't have to tell it like it is. Now that's just bad. You've got no attitude, you're barely outrageous, and I don't know what you're in, but it's not my face. Next!
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Aug 3, 2014 05:30
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The year was 1968. We were on recon in a steaming Mekong delta. An overheated private removed his flack jacket, revealing a T-shirt with an ironed-on sporting the MAD slogan "Up with Mini-skirts!" Well, we all had a good laugh, even though I didn't quite understand it. But our momentary lapse of concentration allowed Charlie to get the drop on us. I spent the next three years in a POW camp, forced to subsist on a thin stew made of fish, vegetables, prawns, coconut milk, and four kinds of rice. I came close to madness trying to find it here in the States, but they just can't get the spices right!
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Aug 5, 2014 03:01
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ThNextGreenLantern posted:We don't have bums in our thread, Drink-Mix Man, and if we did they wouldn't rush, they'd be allowed to go at their own pace.  ♪ Nothing beats the hobo life! Stabbin' goons with my hobo knife! ♪
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Aug 8, 2014 04:27
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Red posted:The winner will be showered with praise. The loser will be taunted and booed until my throat is sore! Yeah, Red, that team sure sucked last night. They just plain sucked. I've seen teams suck before but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks who ever sucked.
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Aug 8, 2014 23:19
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CharlieFoxtrot posted:Why, it's Fred Flintstone and his lovely wife Wilma! Oh, and this must be little Pebbles. Why, it's that delightful TV leprechaun. I'm going to get your Lucky Charms. 
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Aug 9, 2014 15:45
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Trash Boat posted:So let's review. You two screwballs have just strolled in here fresh from the sewer and given me a bunch of bulldink about creating Itchy with no proof at all, and you expect me to give you… how much? I don't need any more money, I'm not greedy. As long as I've got my health, and my millions of dollars and my solid gold house and my rocket car, I don't need anything else.
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Aug 9, 2014 19:28
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TMMadman posted:Oh, don't worry, IMJack. You know me, and I'm a superstar at the cracker factory. TMMadman, crackers are a family food. Happy families. Maybe single people eat crackers, we don't know. Frankly, we don't want to know. It's a market we can do without.
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Aug 12, 2014 04:20
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Benny the Snake posted:AAAH, MY RETINAS! Sorry about the landing, boys. This fog is so thick, I can't see my own cataracts.
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Aug 13, 2014 03:47
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jscolon2.0 posted:Stage directions? Highly dubious! What're you cackling at, fatty? Too much pie, that's your problem!
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Aug 13, 2014 23:35
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Drink-Mix Man posted:Free to loving home: world's most brilliant dog. Says "I love you" on command. Drink-Mix Man, are you wearing a tie to impress Laddie?
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Aug 17, 2014 00:07
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mrfart posted:I'm afraid "sorry" doesn't cut it with this pope! The phony pope can be identified by his high top sneakers, and incredibly foul mouth.
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Aug 17, 2014 17:18
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gingerberger posted:Trash, in, trashcan. Hmm, makes sense. Kill. Wealthy. Dowager.
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Aug 19, 2014 05:21
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ThNextGreenLantern posted:Let's HAUL rear end to Lollapalooza! Oh. I know that voice. TVIV's bottomless chum bucket has claimed TheNextGreenLantern!
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Aug 19, 2014 14:38
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Jackie D posted:My client has asked me to remind the court that he is rich, and important, and not like other men. Well, if it's a crime to love one's country, then I'm guilty. And if it's a crime to steal a trillion dollars from our government and hand it over to communist Cuba, then I'm guilty of that too. And if it's a crime to bribe a jury, then so help me, I'll soon be guilty of that!
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Aug 22, 2014 04:02
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NoMoneyDown posted:That dog can sell anything. 
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Aug 23, 2014 15:18
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ThNextGreenLantern posted:Way to make me feel obsolete. Jerusalem posted:How does it stay so topical!?! Don't. Praise. The Machine.
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Aug 25, 2014 23:17
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Lord Hydronium posted:Yeah, uh, give me one of those porno magazines, large box of condoms, bottle of Old Harper, a box of panty shields, and some illegal fireworks, and one of those disposable enemas. Eh, make it two. I don't know what you've got planned for tonight Lord Hydronium, but count me out!
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Aug 29, 2014 18:14
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Spectacle Rock posted:My Krusty calculator didn't have a seven or an eight! Careful, Spectacle Rock! You'll break my calculator... by which I mean my head.
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Aug 31, 2014 05:55
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mrfart posted:Your nickname will be Cosmos. Let's go burn down the observatory, so this'll never happen again!
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Sep 1, 2014 19:58
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I know those words, but that sign makes no sense.
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Sep 2, 2014 04:48
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CharlieFoxtrot posted:I've been reading a lot of scripts lately. It's cheaper than going to the movies, you know. MondayHotDog posted:Most movie scripts are 120 pages. This is only 17. And several of them are just drawings of the time machine. The important thing is, it's got the perfect part for you. Either one of you! It's about a killer robot driving instructor who travels back in time for some reason. Do over Ham's attached to direct!
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Sep 3, 2014 05:40
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ThNextGreenLantern posted:Good lord, what a dump. It's not surprising this thread was once classified THE most dilapidated in all of Missouri. I'll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missourah! 
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Sep 4, 2014 02:54
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Applewhite posted:No, they're really burning! I wanted to see inside so I lit a Q-tip. Shut up, brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip!
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Sep 5, 2014 02:06
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jscolon2.0 posted:Remember that old Plymouth we just couldn't fix? You're a dull boy, jscolon2.0.
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Sep 5, 2014 05:15
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CharlieFoxtrot posted:And the dog on the Coppertone ad? Same deal?
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Sep 6, 2014 17:00
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