JoeRules posted:

Little Mac brought us the idea: Taking the May 1996 mod to TEW 2013 and pitting two goon factions against each other, one as WWF, and the other as WCW. The mod begins with the signing of Kevin Nash and Scott Hall to WCW.

We have WCW's booking team:
Great White Hope
Golden Bee
CaptainYesterday
RZApublican
AfterFather

And WWF's booking team:
I Before E
Abrasive Obelisk
Junpei Hyde
GenericMartini
Defiance Industries
Xerzes
NowOnSA

You may join a booking team at any time, but choose wisely - once you've picked a team, you cannot switch teams for any reason. Booking is mostly done via IRC chat, with some notes passed back and forth via Google Docs. For folks who played the previous version, we have new IRC channels and documents, but the old doc will be provided for you as a resource.

New folks and old folks alike, I need your e-mail address to give you your IRC channel and give you permission for the Google Doc. I have PMs, or you can e-mail me at SAJoeRules on gmail.

I've never run a TEW game of this nature before, so bear with me. I hope to run shows every other day (once we get started), and hopefully I can even give you a specific time, for booking deadlines and any in-game incidents that occur.

Little Mac posted:

Awhile back I did a TEW2010 thread that had a lot of weird rules and ended up getting overtaken by some weird spergy guy and eventually ended in people playing Trivial Pursuit and becoming skeletons.

With Rarity doing an excellent modern TEW thread that I hope returns very soon, I figured I'd set up another one in a different niche with a different gimmick. We're heading out of modern WWE territory and heading just past the Death of the Territories. The WCW re-watch is almost right after where we'll begin, so turn your Wayback machines to May 1996.

The gimmick of this thread isn't just to lead the WWF or WCW to win the blossoming Monday Night Wars, but to choose a side.

Both WCW and WWF will be booked here and the catch is that you can only book for one or the other. Anyone can join or leave the booking teams at any time, but you cannot switch once you choose (unless prompted by certain events). So if you choose to join WCW, decide you don't want to play anymore, and then come back - you can't come back with the WWF.

Total Extreme What Now?
Total Extreme Wrestling is a booking simulation series made by this guy named Adam Ryland. He's been making them since forever and up to TEW2005 is freeware. While the game comes with a host of fantasy characters Ryland and others have created, there's also a pretty intense modding scene that allows for various real world scenarios. We'll be using a modded scenario here in TEW2013, which came out late last year. It's a much faster game and seems like it might just be the best in the series so far - that remains to be seen!

So What's May 1996 Like?

WCW
. The Giant is currently in his second WCW World Title run. Konnan is currently the United States champion, while Lex Luger holds two belts: The Television Title and the Tag Titles along with Sting.

. Following the failed "Alliance to end Hulkamania," the Dungeon of Doom and The Horsemen have split up and look to be heading into battle with each other.

. Hulk Hogan is becoming slightly stale in his character and fans are starting to turn on him.

. Introduction of foreign stars like Konnan, Jushin Liger, Eddie Guerrero etc.

. Kevin Nash and Scott Hall have just signed for the company but the news has yet to be spoiled online.

WWF
. Shawn Michaels is the top babyface and just won his first World title from Bret Hart in a sixty minute iron man match. Now Bret looks to take a short period of time off to let Michaels adjust to the top babyface role. In addition to this, Goldust holds the Intercontinental Title while the Bodydonnas hold the tag belts.

. Losing two major stars to their rivals, the company needs to find new stars in the undercard which currently includes Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Steve Austin and Owen Hart.

. Struggling for star power, Roddy Piper and The Ultimate Warrior have been brought back for another run with the company.

. The recently debuted Vader is being positioned to be a monster heel to take on Michaels in the future and is gearing up for a rivalry with Yokozuna to get him to that level.

So What Else Do I Need To Know?

While discussion and shows will be posted in thread, actual decisions will be made in ~seeecret documennnnnts~ so that we actually have a sense of competition (though sometimes shows might be taped before others - so beware!). Booking decisions will be based on majority rule of who's voted by time limit (so if there's 20 bookers, ten people vote, and 6 say that the Giant should lose to Kevin Sullivan, then that's majority). I will write the shows, though all the ideas behind them come from you.

There won't be any self-imposed limits here like my last game, but the goal is to keep it mostly serious since going insane and making Triple H a nazi sex character will probably cause you to lose to the other team. The only limits are what the game has imposed - some workers have creative control, so Kevin Nash might not lie down for Chris Jericho. You definitely don't have to follow history - unless you want to. Have fun and be creative, but maybe giving Hulk Hogan an alien from Mars gimmick might not work so well?

Additionally, there will be some out-of-game events. WCW might sway a couple of bookers from WWF, or perhaps a hurricane keeps part of WCW's bookers away from the show, and of course there will still be interaction with management. While I'm acting as a conduit for playing the game, I want to make it a little different than if you were playing by yourself.

So all that's left is for you to choose a side. Will you help Eric Bischoff and the just-out-of-the-minors WCW overtake Vince McMahon or will you help new writer Vince Russo keep the struggling WWF afloat? I'll give it a day or two for signups then we can start. Remember, even if you're late to the thread we're always taking new hires (and the teams need not be balanced - potentially WWF could be 20 guys and WCW could be 1).

JoeRules posted:

No. Sorry if that's not clear - we're picking up from the same save file. But I do want some more security on the IRC channel and the Google Doc, so those will be starting anew. But truly, there's nothing stopping you from copy/pasting the entire old doc into the new version.

JoeRules posted:

I'm not following your question - the last thing that Little Mac ran was both companies PPVs that occurred on Sunday Week 3 May 1996. We're picking up from Monday Week 4, the very next day.

JoeRules posted:

I just left WCW a nice present under their IRC tree.

JoeRules posted:

Superstars will run by tomorrow, and SatNight has already been run. In the meantime, here's a mini-Observer.

Q7kid posted:

Truly, we anticipated using Paul Orndorff as a perennial main eventer and are crushed utterly that he has opted to end his in-ring career.


Intercontinental Champion Dr. Tom Prichard.

Q7kid posted:

All-hands meeting in WCW IRC tonight to discuss this latest escalation of the Monday Night Wars and to openly mock WWF for losing Maivia. Maybe 8:00 PM EST?

I'd also like to throw out an open call for anybody who has been reading the thread and itching to start contributing to come play with the big boys--your fresh ideas are more than welcome at Turner, and we'd be pumped to have you join the team.

quote:

<USENET REPORT FROM USER: heymanhustle@aol.com>

WOOOO! It’s been a while, but I’m a WWF boy again! To all ya’ll you couldn’t catch tonight’s show, here’s the scoop:

Before the show, there were ONE dark match. ONE! Looks like Russo and friends heard our complaints!

First up was Smoking Gunns vs. Wild Sparks… as a singles match! Billy Gunn w/Bart Gunn vs. Marc Mero w/Marlena and Bob Holly! It was fairly even, got decent time, but Billy took the win as he should by overcoming the odds. The crowd were sorta into it, but they all noticed that Billy and Marc have some nice chemistry!

The main show kicked off with the title feud being displayed as a video, including all the actions of Good Guy Shawn Michaels! The crowd went absolutely crazy for it!

First match was new Gary Albright vs. Savio Vega. Even with Gary’s legendaryness, the crowd didn’t like it and made them sad.

And now Backlund comes out! Strolling to the ring, he rambles on. "I, FOR ONE, AM SICK! AND! TIRED! OF THE BOORISH MISCREANTS THAT MAKE UP TODAY'S YOUTH! YOU PARENTS ARE CONTENT TO LET YOUR CHILDREN SIT UNEDUCATED WHILE THEY'RE GLUED TO THEIR FANCY-SCHMANCY TELL-O-VISIONS, AND YOU LET THEIR YOUNG BRAINS ROT AWAY! THEY SIT THERE WATCHING THE DEGENERATE MONKEYS OF THE SO CALLED EXTREME CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING, AND THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT REA WRESTLING IS! BUT CHARLIE HAAS HERE IS DIFFERENT! HE, MUCH LIKE MYSELF AT HIS AGE, IS A PURE BORN NATURAL TECHNICAL WRESTLER, AND HE AND MYSELF ARE HERE TO PROVE THAT REAL WRESTLING SHALL REIGN SUPREME! I AM MR. BOB BACKLUND, FORMER WWF CHAMPION AND THIS IS FORMER NCAA CHAMPION CHARLIE HAAS AND WE ARE THE EPITOME OF WRESTLING'S PAST, ITS PRESENT, AND WE SURE AS HECK ARE GONNA BE THE FUTURE! AND IF YOU IDIOTS AREN'T HAPPY, THEN YOU CAN COME DOWN HERE, AND WE CAN SHOW YOU JUST HOW GREAT OUR STYLE IS BY PUTTING YOU IN THE CROSS! FACE! CHICKEN! WIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!" Crowd liked it better than the last match, that’s for sure.


Now on to King Of The Ring action! Part 2, Owen Hart vs. Bob Holly! Holly never had a chance as Owen throws him around like a ragdoll with torn rags! To finish him off, Owen delivers a piledriver!

Jim Cornette appears backstage! He puts over Owen Hart quite well. "WHOEVER WINS LATER TONIGHT, WHETHER IT'S THAT SPOILED BRAT MAIVIA OR THAT POMPOUS rear end HELMSLEY, THEY CAN'T SHINE THE BOOTS OF THE HART SCION! THEY WON'T STAND A CHANCE IN THE SEMIFINALS AGAINST OWEN HART, THE BEST TECHNICAL WRESTLER IN THIS FEDERATION OR ANY OTHER!" Crowd quite liked it.

After that, we get treated to another video of the Chris Candido/Tom Pritchard feud. It seems like this is going to be going on for quite a while, but no one cares.

Next, the Dudleyz come out and challenge the Gunns to a fight! "Unless you're not man enough!" Gunns also ride out, and accept! Dudleyz vs. Gunns, King of The Ring for the belts!

Gunns leave, and out comes the newest tag team. Comprised of Dick Togo and Kaz Hayashi, they are the HAY DICK! Dudleyz beat HAY DICK in some time, with Buh-Buh Ray pinning Dick Togo. As both these teams are new, crowd didn’t like it.

After that match, Jake “The Snake” Roberts crawls out and speaks along with Edge! Edge vows to show that he can recover from losing, and that he'll be a winner. Jake says, "Now I hear some people have been wondering why I've been in the corner of this young man here, and that's because he's told me he wants to change. Starting now, Edge is gonna start on the path of a winner, and he won't need any dirty tricks like I did. This kid's gonna win fairly." So… Jake is Edge’s manager? And Edge is a good guy?

In the ring, Marty Jannetty and the Brooklyn Brawler are sparring, and- it ended. Jannetty won as usual.

Mankind is rocking back and forth, backstage, ranting. "Ultimate Warrior, you may believe you have the power to go where no other man can go, but you don't know what Mankind is capable of! At King Of The Ring, I want to show you just where I can take you, show you parts unknown even to you, Warrior! YOU TAKE THAT PLANE INTO A NOSEDIVE! YOU TAKE THE CONTROLS AND DIVE IT INTO THE DARK, MYSTERIOUS RECESSES OF THE HUMAN PSYCHE, WARRIOR! BECAUSE THAT'S WHERE I LIVE! THAT'S WHERE I THRIVE! THAT'S WHERE MONSTERS LIKE ME ARE MADE!" Pretty creepy, overall, but crowd just ate it up.

And now, Jake Roberts vs. Mankind! Mankind won with the Mandible Claw! Everyone loved it; for them, it was the match of the night.

Another promo, this time with Jerry “The King” Lawler! And special guests Jim Cornette and Mr. Fuji! Those two argue about their clients, Vader and Yokozuna, while they stand menacingly. As the bosses get angrier, so do the behemoths! After a shoving contest broken up by King, it cuts to backstage. Cornette was good as always, but Fuji wasn’t.

Triple Triple H came out to speak! "About my upcoming King of the Ring quarterfinals match. Or at least, that's what I'd like to say. It seems my opponent, one Rocky Maivia, has gotten cold feet and ran off. I can't say I blame him, we all know how the match would have gone. Perhaps he realized that and decided it wasn't worth the effort of showing up. Regardless, I suppose I shall now make the announcement personally. I, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, shall advance to the quarterfinals by forfe..."

Suddenly, Edge with Jake storms down to the ring to confront HHH! "Hunter, something tells me that these fans aren't gonna be happy if there's no main event. I want another chance at this thing. How about you fight me, and the winner is the one who shall advance in the tournament! Unless, of course, you're afraid you'll lose?" Hunter retorts "I'm not afraid of anyone, least of all a piece of trash who couldn't even make it past round one. Fine, you have your match, though the people in the crowd should get their cameras ready now, because this one's gonna be over quick!"

And now for the main event! KING OF THE RING Round 2: HHH w/ Stone Cold Steve Austin v. Edge w/Jake Roberts. All contestants gave everything they got. Stone Cold tried to interfere, but Edge accidentally cased Austin to hit HHH! Confused, Edge beat HHH with the Snakebite! Edge is moving on to end the show! HHH was very pissed about the result, and it showed. While it was a good match, the crowd were sick of Edge.

I loved the show, but I have to give it a C rating. Better luck next time!

Evil Badman posted:

Is this Raw or Superstars? What happened to Superstars?

Skunkrocker posted:

Part of me wants to ask WWF if they want the real Skunkrocker to start writing Marty's promos.

Then I remembered I work for WCW.

BoredDG posted:

A Fans Bring the Weapons match would be the perfect opportunity for the Hulkamaniacs to prove their loyalty!

Also, I just realized how weird this "Attitude Era" is going to be. There's no nWo in WCW, no Austin 3:16 promo in the WWF, Rocky might not become famous in the WWF, Jericho started by being mentored by Piper in the WWF, and who knows what's happening in ECW with most of their talent raided by both companies.

I Before E posted:

I'm sorry what? Rocky's in NJPW?

Nystral posted:

Is Yoko's weight a real concern within TEW or just something made up as flavor?

I'm really liking both sides here as they both have some really compelling story lines.

MysticalMachineGun posted:

Man, why aren't you squashing 1-2-3 Kid on tv, WWF? Bury him in public!

Shogunate posted:

What was the actual rating for the MitB match? How much did it drag the show down by?

Also you have made me so hyped for the debut of Dave Taylor, such a man.

Golden Bee posted:

WWF should be disqualified. As good as they've gotten with Goldust, Dave Taylor hasn't technically debuted.

MysticalMachineGun posted:

The only option is Fans Bring the Weapons and All the Weapons Are Yappapi Straps Match

Volcano Style posted:

Great White Hope posted:

Is "We have the power to do anything but are too afraid to come up with our own ideas" supposed to be a good thing?

GenericMartini posted:

triplexpac posted:

If it were up to me, I would have done MITB as a different kind of match besides a high spot ladder match. Those types of matches just weren't a thing in mainstream wrestling 1996/97. It's like when Marty McFly goes back in time and blows everyone's mind playing modern music, it doesn't click.

CaptainYesterday posted:

Skunkrocker, I don't have your poster.

Skunkrocker posted:

Yeah guys, sorry. Been feeling a bit burnt out on the thread. Taking a break for now.

Q7kid posted:

God bless you, you're a treasure.

Abrasive Obelisk posted:

All WWF writers, report to IRC at Noon ET

Q7kid posted:

I feel for you. The show rating was conspicuous by its absence, though--care to share?

Sanguinia posted:

WWF gave away Mankind vs The Undertaker for literally no reason and no stakes on their first Raw, I think we're entitled to a throwaway gimmick match for some midcarders.

Little Mac posted:

WWF Monday Night Raw, Week 1, May 1996
<USENET REPORT FROM USER: scoopsullivan@mail.com>

Alright, so I was at Raw. Here's the scoops. No dark matches. Show started with Ahmed Johnson beating Mabel - drat Mabel is fat. Afterward, Bob Backlund came out for some reason and yelled at Ahmed. Ahmed laughed him off and Backlund put him in the crossface.

The announcers talked about Mankind facing Undertaker in a #1 Contender's Match for the WWF title and afterward Vader completely killed Isaac Yankem in a short squash. Looks like the dentist got injured.

They showed a boring video for Yokozuna.

123 Kid fought Henry Godwinn and it was okay, I guess. Phineas interfered to help HOG get the win and then they turned heel to stomp on the Kid. Kid turned face when Marty Jannetty of all people came out to save him. Weird segment.

New team: Marc Mero and Bob Holly - "The Wild Sparks" (who comes up with this poo poo) - fought Owen and Bulldog. Owen won with the sharpshooter. Okay match.

In what might've been match of the night, Roddy Piper fought Tatanka. Tatanka usually blows major chunks so this was weird to see. Fun match! Piper wins with the sleeper.

HBK did a promo backstage talking about how awesome he was and it didn't matter who was winning tonight: he'd beat them In Your House.

HHH beat Savio Vega. Eh match.

Mankind fought Undertaker. Good match until Goldust came in to interfere, giving Mankind the win. Not a bad ending.

FINAL RATING: C

Little Mac posted:

WWF Superstars, Week 1, May 1996

<USENET POST FROM USER: stillreal2me@altavista.com>

OKAY PROMISED SUPERSTARS REPORT HERE IT IS.

IN A DARK MATCH MARTY JANETTEY BEAT RAD RADFORD. WHO THE HECK IS RAD RADFORD

IN ANOTHER DARK, 123 KID BEAT MARC MERO. THEY DIDNT REALLY WORK WELL TOGETHER I GUESS BECAUSE THEY ARE BOTH LAME!!! AFTERWARD THEY SHOOK HANDS

ONCE THE CAMERAS TURND ON IT WS BODYDONNAS VS WILD SPARKS (SO MARC MERO FOUGHT TWICE - SOMEONE THINKS HE IS A WORK HORSE OR SOMETHING). ZIP PINNED MERO

BROTHER LOVE CAME OUT TO DO INNERVIEW SHOW AND HE WAS TALK TO YOKOZUNA. YOKOWAS ABOUT TO SAY WORDS IN JAPANES I GUESS AND THEN JESS JAMES HIT HIM FOR NO REASON. WHY THE ROADIE HIT A SUMO? YOKO VS JESSE MADE FOR LATER TONITE

OWN HEART BEAT BARRY HORWITS. P EASY MATCH. THEN CORNETTE AND BULLDOG TALK ABOUT HOW HBK IS LOSER WHICH IS FACTUALLY UNTRUE.

STONE COLD STEVE AUTSIN FIGHT PHATU AND PHATU GET STONE COLD STUNNERED. AUTSIN WENT TO THE BACK AND TALKED TO HUNTER HEARST HELMSEY AND HE SAYS THEY MAYBE WANT TO TEAM UP AND AUTSIN SAYS HE'LL THINK ABOUT IT.

GUNNS VS GODWINNS, GUNNS WIN. GODWINNS SUCK. GUNNS THEN HAVE ANNOUNCED THEY WILL FIGHT BODYDONNAS FOR TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS AT IN YOUR HOUSE.

A CREEPY AND COOL MANKIND VIDEO PLAYED. LOVE ME SOME MANDKIND.

YOKOZUNA DEF JESSE JAMES CLEAN AND EASY. OKAY

DARK MAIN EVENT HAD HBK FIGHT BRIT BULLDOG AND WIN CLEAN. REALLY NOT AS GOOD OF A MATCH AS YOUD EXPECT. OH WELL.

I GIVE THIS SHOW A C-. WWF CAN DO BETTER.

PEACE OUT YALL SEE YA NEXT WEEK!!!

quote:

<USENET REPORT FROM USER: scoopsullivan@mail.com>

Hiya WWFans! Scoop here with your weekly scoop on Raw!

In a dark match, Zip def Avatar. Sunny was hot as usual.

The show opened with an Owen Hart interview where he was going to talk about his next steps in the WWF, before Roddy flippin' Piper interrupted! The Rowdy One went nuts on Owen, calling him the "best that never will be" and saying that "even a man on leave is better than you, Owen." Not even sure who's the heal, but it was still a great segment!

Goldust def Duke Droese. Marlena is just terrible out there - she looks so bad. After, Goldust cut a promo on the Undertaker saying he was after Taker's gold - the one that Paul Bearer held so tightly all those years. The urn!!!

H.O.G. def Bob Holly. Close match, but neither is a very good wrestler. Afterward, the Godwinns cut a promo on how they're coming for the tag belts soon and said only one thing was holding them back: then they laid out Hillbilly Jim!

Smoking Gunns vs Rad Buffalos (Rad Radford and Tatanka). Really weird pairing that second team - they really don't mesh well. Sunny came out to watch the match, which the Gunns won. Then she blew the Gunns a kiss.

Jerry Lawler gets interviewed by Vince McMahon about his match with Yokozuna later tonight. Lawler states that he's confident he'll win and that he'll send Yoko back to Japan a, quote, "poached whale." Yikes.

Quick video for the Undertaker. Really cool video team they have at WWF. They need to get a raise.

Vader attacks Steve Austin out of nowhere, but then Hunter Helmsley shows up for the save. I guess Austin and HHH are teaming up? Again, who's the face?

Yokozuna def Jerry Lawler after Lawler escapes outside and then clocks Yoko with his crown.

Mankind def Marty Jannetty. Not a bad match, actually. Ends with Mankind putting the mandible claw on Jannetty as he jumps off the top for a double axe handle. Cool ending.

Afterward, HBK came out to stare down Mankind and end the show.

Not a bad Raw, looks like WWF is kinda coasting though.

Final Rating: C

quote:

WWF Superstars, Week 2, May 1996


<USENET REPORT FROM USER: bazooka@kabo.om>

Alright, and now the Superstars report! Lotsa wrestling on this show.

Dark Match - Savio Vega def. Sir Mo. Meh match.

Phineas Godwinn def. Aldo Montoya (THE PORTUGUESE MAN O WAR!!!) with Henry at ringside. Pretty sloppy match, no pun intended.

Bart Gunn def. Justin "Hawk" Bradshaw. They worked really well together, but both are limited performers. Sunny came down for guest commentary and said a bunch of sexually suggestive things.

1-2-3 Kid def. Brooklyn Brawler clean. Short match. Crowd shat on it.

Hunter Helmsley and Steve Austin are told by someone backstage they have a match with the Bushwhackers and Hunter cuts a pretty smarmy promo about how they're uncivilized and weak. Austin stands in the back and just looks mean. Then the match happens and sure enough, the 'whackers lose to a Pedigree.

Ahmed Johnson def. Phatu. Even, quickly paced match, but boy do they not work well together. Afterward, though, Bob Backlund showed up afterward to say he was impressed by Ahmed's victory, but that Mr. Backlund was still stronger. Ahmed rebuffed him but Backlund said Ahmed could have a front-row seat as the special guest ref in his next match!

Jake Roberts def. Bob Backlund. Pretty good match. Backlund should've won after a pretty good bridging butterfly suplex, but Ahmed stalls the count enough for Jake to kick out. While Backlund's arguing with Ahmed, Jake gets up and hits the DDT.

Shawn Michaels def. Tatanka in a pretty great match that the crowd was hyped for - which I think you could say of HBK vs. Anyone, really. Not a lot of storyline movement on this show and honestly, maybe there was TOO much wrestling.

Final Grade: C-

quote:

WWF Monday Night Raw, Week 3, May 1996


<USENET REPORT FROM USER: scoopsullivan@mail.com>

Hey gang it's Scoop with the Scoops here! I've got your Raw report and, spoiler alert: it's pretty great show! (also please don't steal "spoiler alert" - I came up with it! It's kinda my thing!!!)

In a dark match, the WWF debuted their new guy from USAW, Rocky Maiavia, and he had a pretty impressive win over Justin Bradshaw. Not the worst match I've ever seen. Maybe this kid will go places?

When the show started we were immediately treated to Zip vs. Phatu. While most people would wonder what they could've done to deserve this, it wasn't that bad of a match either! Zip went over clean, but Phatu put up a good fight.

Immediately afterward, the Undertaker squashed Rad Radford. No one will mourn him. Afterward, Goldust stared at the urn from the stage. Dude loves gold, I guess?

A video played for Maiavia. Again, not a surprise they want to push him but this went over like a wet blanket.

Hunter Helmsley fought 1-2-3- Kid and Kid won cleanly. Afterward Hunter and Austin got on the mic and started yelling about how Kid was lucky. "No peasant like you could defeat a real man like me!" So Kid said he and Jannetty would take them both on at IYH, and I guess the match was made.

Freaking CHRIS JERICHO came out for his debut promo. I was a big fan of Jericho's stuff in SMW and Japan, so seeing him come out was a treat for me - maybe not the rest of the crowd, though. He talked about how he's done it all around the world and now he's come to America to be a champion. "You've NEVER - EEEEEEVER - see anything like Chris Jericho - before!" Jericho and Skip had a quick and fun match that Jericho won. He still needs time to get the crowd on his side, but I'm marking out bro!

Backstage, Ahmed Johnson and Bob Backlund got in an argument and started wailing on one another after Backlund called Ahmed a, quote, "Less-than-vociferous loblolly." Half the lockeroom showed up to pull them apart before President Monsoon showed up to say they, too, could settle their differences on Sunday.

Shawn Michaels def. Hakushi with the superkick. Cool to see Hakushi back, too. Afterward, HBK cut a promo on Mankind and how he'll gladly knock some sense into his lunatic #1 contender.

Finally, King's Court. Jerry Lawler came out to interview the Ultimate Warrior who pretty much frothed at the mouth for two minutes. Then Vader came out and Lawler turned on Warrior, backing up the big man. Yokozuna comes out and clobbers Lawler and the fight's on. Monsoon comes out and books a tag match - RIGHT NOW! That match is pretty good and ends with a double-count out: Warrior and Vader brawl to the back, leaving Yoko to get hit with a lowblow and stomped on by Lawler to end the show. The camera faded out on Mr. Fuji looking at Yokozuna with disappointment.

In a dark main event, Jake Roberts lost to Mankind. Okay match - Jake might be a bit past his prime.

Good Raw. I got to see Chris Jericho.

Final Score: C+

quote:

WWF Superstars, Week 3, May 1996 posted:
<USENET POST FROM USER: hbksexyboy1981@hotmail.com>

Oh my god y'all I just got back from the Superstars taping.

Before the show they had a couple dark matches. The first weren't nothing special, Marc Mero and this little flippy dude, they called him Tie-jiri. He was pretty cool, but nobody really got going. Mero got a quick pin off a rollup, but you could tell they was equals in skill.

The second... the second, y'all. I've heard a lot about a little promotion called E-C-Dubya, but oh my god I did not expect this. These 2 dudes, a fat black guy called Devon and this fat white dude called Buhbuh Ray, just set it the gently caress off agin' a couple scrawny little country boys, called 'em the Encyclopedia Browns or summat. It was so cool, y'all. They flowed real well together, they all were cool as ice, especially Buhbuh, that dude is intense. But again, the crowd didn't really get going, and it really hurt the match. Dudleys won, but still, it coulda gone either way.

When the show actually got to goin', it was 123 Kid up against Tatanka, an' 123 used all his razzle dazzle to get that big ol' Indian down for the 123. The crowd was p. hype for this one, but it still wasn't super crazy or nothin'.

Then Hunter Hearst Helmsley demolished this dude, D'lo Brown. Kind of a snoozer. After, the dude got on the mic, started givin' guff to dudes who like Janetty and 123 Kid. gently caress that rich-rear end mufucker. Kid Rockers gonna beat his bitch rear end at Heartbroken. That Stone Cold dude is alright though. Likes bustin' poo poo and drinking beers, just like me.

Then that Goldust guy came out, talked to Cornette about wantin' Taker's urn or whatever, but then Phatu came out. Phatu was like, "I know you like gold, dude, I like some gold myself. Your IC title gold, playaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa" and it was pretty sick.

Then Owen Hart came out and talked some crap, thankfully MY BOY CHRIS JERICHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO came out to set his rear end right. This wasn't as sick as the Goldust/Phatu confrontation, but it was sick.

Then it was Zip and Bart Gunn, who are gonna have a tag title match at Heartbroken. Their tag partners, Skip and Billy Gunn, got into it too, and Zip ended up getting the pin. Bart even went through an announcer table! Still pretty sick.

Then Jerry Lawler and Yokozuna came out, and yo. I'm not no sensitive guy, but this kinda crossed a line. You just don't say some of the poo poo Jerry said. I hope that asian motherfucker Bonsai Drops or whatever the gently caress outta him. The crowd was pretty into it though, booing, making a little noise, but nothing much.

Then my boy JERICHOOOOOOOOO came out to have a match with Owen Hart, and these dudes set it the gently caress off. They're so drat good, y'all. It was even until Owen hit this crazy belly-to-belly for the pin, and after, he put Jericho into the Sharpshooter and wouldn't let it go, and Rowdy Roddy had to come get him out! That dude was all out of bubble gum, if you know what I'm sayin'. Then they did a little talking, and they're working together! God drat, man! These are some cool dudes.

Then Warrior squashed King Mo and faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaart. But then Vader came out, Vaderbombed Mo, and they stared it down! Sheeeeeeiiiiiit!

Then HBK, the Heartbreak mu-fuckin' Kid, and Mankind had the contract signing for Heartbroken. Mankind tried some poo poo, and HEARTBREAK GAVE IT RIGHT BACK! HELL YEAH, HEARTBREAK! TEACH THAT MASK-rear end MUFUCKA YOU DON'T MESS WITH TEJAS!

Then the dark main event was HBK and Yoko versus Mankind and Lawler. Lawler didn't get a big rear end to the head like I wanted, but he got a Sweet Chin Music that almost knocked him out of his boots! Mankind and HBK can do some stuff together, that's no lie!

The show was pretty decent overall, a solid C.

quote:

<USENET REPORT FROM USER: scoopsullivan@mail.com>
WWF In Your House 8: Heartbroken

Hey Federation Fanatics! The Scoopster's here with another batch of results, this time from the big WWF pay-per-view extravaganza: In Your House! I never got what that meant. I mean, none of them take place in my house. Silly, WWF! I don't live in arenas (anymore)! The results:

Dark Match - The Dudley Boys def. The Wild Sparks. Pretty dead crowd.

The show starts with Rocky Maiavia hitting his Rock Bottom maneuver on Jesse James for a three-count. Rocky's got a big future in the WWF, I can smell it!

The Two Man Power Trip (Austin/HHH) def. the Kid Rockers. The TMPT beat on the Kid for a long time but he finally makes his hot tag to Marty! Of course, Marty comes in and IMMEDIATELY eats a Stone Cold Stunner. OUCH!

Goldust vs. Phatu for the IC Title. Goldust ends up hitting Phatu with the belt and right before he can make the pin, the lights go out and a GONG hits. When they come back up, Phatu is on top of Goldust. The ref counts and PHATU is your NEW Intercontinental Champion! The Undertaker walks in and kneels in front of the former champ.

Smoking Gunns def The Bodydonnas for the WWF Tag Team Championship. The Donnas seem to be jealous over receiving Sunny's affections, an that resulted in Skip getting pinned by Bart. The Gunns left with the titles held high!

In the back, Roddy Piper is psyching young Chris Jericho up. He says Jericho should go out and look for a fight if they're not gonna give him one, so he goes to the ring and delivers an open challenge. Tatanka answers. Quick short match. Jericho could only do so much to cover up to Tatanka (BUFFALO).

Yokozuna vs. Jerry Lawler. Lawler comes out in freaking YELLOW FACE surrounded by several geisha and tiny Asian men carrying him to the ring. Lawler takes the mic and says he wanted Yoko to, quote, "get the Jap experience" and is ready to send Yoko home a loser. Yoko comes out to a pop but gets clobbered by a statue of Buddha Lawler was carrying. Lawler lays his hands on Fuji and Yoko goes nuts, eventually Banzai Dropping Lawler like a bad habit. Yokozuna wins.

Ahmed Johnson def. Bob Backlund. Ahmed breaks out of the chicken wing - TWICE - and eventually plunges Bob to his defeat. Afterward, Charlie Haas shows up, runs down, and unprovoked attacks Ahmed, beating him down in the ring. Haas stands to accept boos, but really the crowd is just mega disinterested.

Owen Hart def. Roddy Piper. AWESOME match with some great back and forth. The most alive I've seen Piper in ages. Piper kicks out of every pin attempt Hart throws at him, so Owen applies the Sharpshooter. After minutes of agony, Piper taps out.

Vader def. Ultimate Warrior. Pretty blah match, but to be expected with the Warrior. It was cool to see Vader just straight outpower Warrior, though. He ends up powerbombing Warrior for the win.

Finally, main event. Shawn Michaels vs. Mankind for the WWF Championship. Mankind immediately gets HBK on the defensive with relentless strikes, and chases him around the ring. This quickly turns on Mankind when Shawn finds an opening. They brawl on the inside and outside of the ropes, but outside is Mankind's forte. As they get back in the ring, Michaels makes an opening for Sweet Chin Music and tunes up the band. However, Mankind wises up and ducks under the kick. He counters with a neckbreaker and applies the mandible claw, screaming and slamming HBK's head on the canvas repeatedly while applying it. Michaels gets a hand on the ropes, keeping him in the match. Mankind remains on top throughout, until HBK finds another opening for a superkick and tunes up the band. Mankind ducks again, but HBK sees it coming and nails Mankind with another superkick as he turns around again! Shawn quickly climbs the turnbuckle and hits a diving elbow drop to make sure Mankind stays down, then covers him for the 3-count. STILL your WWF Champion: Shawn Michaels!!!

All in all, not a bad show. AWESOME Main event didn't hurt matters. Final score: C+

Sanguinia posted:

Are they not spaced out? They look fine to me. They're not perfectly formatted but we're trying not to take up an excessive amount of page space by keeping each segment in its own block of text.

sk posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gsNaR6FRuO0
Monday Night Cold War? We have seen both WCW and WWF take lots of potshots at each other for the past several months, but we've learned that each side independently decided to try and work with the other on an "invasion" storyline. Unfortunately things seem to have fallen apart before such a storyline could get rolling, but hopefully we'll see it come up again soon--there's really no way to screw up a WCW v. WWF angle.
New Japan, Old Problems: We don't cover Japanese wrestling here often, but major news has been developing regarding New Japan Pro Wrestling. A source has said that attendance to shows has been dropping rapidly and many of the company's top stars are ready to walk out. Some insiders are saying the end could come for NJPW by the end of the month, but we'll keep you posted as more comes in.

Senerio posted:

I'll toss my lot in with WWF if they still need dudes. I'm on IRC a lot.

Nystral posted:

This bit was hard to decipher




HHH has to beat both Piper at IYH and Jericho when?

Sanguinia posted:

I think we can all agree that a wrestling bear is such an amazing idea that it was inevitable that we would both come up with it independently.

Why do you think people like Tekken so much? The 'gripping drama' about how the Kazama family are demons and the Mishima family are probably also demons? gently caress that, BEAR!




(Bet you WWF guys wish you could use this emote )

CaptainYesterday posted:

Oh no, we've had plans. This is just Plan B coming into action.