Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Locked thread
Auraboks
Mar 24, 2013

...huh?


In. :toxx:, obviously. Wouldn't want my thumb to get stuck up my rear end again.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Baby Babbeh
Aug 2, 2005

It's hard to soar with the eagles when you work with Turkeys!!





In. :toxx: since that seems to be the only way I can motivate myself not to fail miserably, forever.

Tyrannosaurus
Apr 12, 2006



In.

J.A.B.C.
Jul 2, 2007

There's no need to rush to be an adult.




Not my story, but just something I'd like to share with the group.

So, I decided to at least try a Jack Rose before I start to brainstorm on the idea for my story. I understand that the story itself can't be about alcohol and that it can't play a central roll but I thought it might be a good way to get the creative juices flowing and a story going.

The problem is that Applejack, the most important ingredient, is both not very well known and very popular in Texas. Over the day, I've been to four different liquor stores in the area. Three didn't even stock the drink. Two didn't even know what the drink was. At one of the options in my immediate vicinity I got that 'This guy must be insane' look, even after I showed him the wikipedia article for the drink. Another kept confusing it for a sort of apple-flavored Jack Daniels, which I am sure doesn't exist.

For the second part of this fluid paradox, the store that did have Applejack didn't have any in stock. Apparently, the Lairds brand is the only brand of Applejack sold and it has quite a following, thereby making sure that the liquor store usually was out of the drink. So, in resignation, I deigned to grab a small bottle of Calvados to use as a substitute from the recommendations of the staff.

So, here I sit, sipping a concoction of French apple brandy, grenadine and lime juice in a chilled glass, hoping to get some idea of a way to make this work.

Sorry, thought I'd relay my story to people who might get it. Time to get back to seeing if I can get this idea going. Maybe after another Plastic Rose.

angel opportunity
Sep 7, 2004

Total Eclipse of the Heart

I'm actually on a plane to Recife right now to sample my drink in its native country

blue squares
Sep 28, 2007


My drink is only found in Ronaeu island. The main ingredient is phosphate. Also its the smallest drink in the world.

blue squares fucked around with this message at 01:02 on Dec 3, 2014

Obliterati
Nov 13, 2012

Pain is inevitable.
Suffering is optional.
Thunderdome is forever.


I'm watching Bond films.

Djeser
Mar 22, 2013


it's crow time again



I touched my dick a few minutes ago.

Jonked
Feb 15, 2005


Cyprus

Hammer Bro. posted:

This thread makes me giggle.

Also, I'm in a strange mood. This will be interesting. (In.)
Harvey Wallbanger

kurona_bright posted:

In for this week. Never been drunk before. :v:
Hurricane

SealHammer posted:

I, too, would like to write a non-alcoholic alcohol story.
Tom and Jerry

Auraboks posted:

In. :toxx:, obviously. Wouldn't want my thumb to get stuck up my rear end again.
Gunfire

Baby Babbeh posted:

In. :toxx: since that seems to be the only way I can motivate myself not to fail miserably, forever.
Screwdriver

El Presidente

Corn Syrup
Feb 6, 2006


With a username like mine, I can't skip this week. I'm in.

God Of Paradise
Jan 23, 2012
You know, I'd be less worried about my 16 year old daughter dating a successful 40 year old cartoonist than dating a 16 year old loser.

I mean, Jesus, kid, at least date a motherfucker with abortion money and house to have sex at where your mother and I don't have to hear it. Also, if he treats her poorly, boom, that asshole's gonna catch a statch charge.

Please, John K. Date my daughter... Save her from dating smelly dropouts who wanna-be Soundcloud rappers.


blue squares posted:

My drink is only found in Ronaeu island. The main ingredient is phosphate. Also its the smallest drink in the world.

The smallest nation in the world really is a sinking island made primarily of bird poo poo. It's located between Australia and Hawaii. It has the world's fattest populace. And it had the highest GDP of all third world countries, due to the mining of phosphate.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nauru

Nauru's former president was also the CEO of their phosphate company. Here he is performing the novelty rap song "Fat Boys Make Me Cry."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pRl5ctx-S1M

Here's an episode from Australia's version of Front Line. It tells the ridiculous story of how they lost all of their money. Their government squandered a ton of it on bullshit, then their remaining assets got ripped off by a predatory finance company. Australia's former secretary treasurer was an employee at the finance company at the time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wit3P2MqFeM

Nauru: The Silliest Place On The Planet.

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010


Legit Cyberpunk







God Of Paradise posted:

The smallest nation in the world really is a sinking island made primarily of bird poo poo. It's located between Australia and Hawaii. It has the world's fattest populace. And it had the highest GDP of all third world countries, due to the mining of phosphate.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nauru

Nauru's former president was also the CEO of their phosphate company. Here he is performing the novelty rap song "Fat Boys Make Me Cry."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pRl5ctx-S1M

Here's an episode from Australia's version of Front Line. It tells the ridiculous story of how they lost all of their money. Their government squandered a ton of it on bullshit, then their remaining assets got ripped off by a predatory finance company. Australia's former secretary treasurer was an employee at the finance company at the time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wit3P2MqFeM

Nauru: The Silliest Place On The Planet.

So, are you in?

Fuschia tude
Dec 26, 2004

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2019



Your Sledgehammer posted:

:siren:Week 121 SledgeCrits

Thanks!

Phobia
Apr 25, 2011

I'm a suave detective with a heart of gold in hot pursuit of the malevolent, manipulative
MIAMI MUTILATOR
and the deranged degenerates who only want their
15 MINUTES OF FAME.


OCK.


Alright Jonked, way to go!

Also, sure, why not? :toxx:

Clandestine!
Jul 17, 2010


In!

SurreptitiousMuffin
Mar 21, 2010


and now a public service announcement

:siren: IT IS CLOSING ON THE END OF THE YEAR, WHICH MEANS THE THIS THREAD WILL BE LOCKED SOON AND A NEW ONE LAUNCHED. THAT MEANS YOU CAN'T EDIT OUT ANY STORIES YOU'VE POSTED HERE, AND NO, THE MODS CAN'T DO IT FOR YOU EITHER. NOW WOULD BE THE TIME TO GO BACK THROUGH YOUR ENTRIES IN THIS THREAD AND EDIT OUT ANYTHING YOU THINK YOU MIGHT TRY TO GET PUBLISHED. :siren:

crabrock
Aug 2, 2002


put a link to the story in the writocracy.com archive tho, so that future generations of TDers who are reading the old threads can see the story.

I leave the title, word count, and a link to the archive

you can lock your own stories in the archive so that nobody can see them but you.

Jonked
Feb 15, 2005


Boozahol posted:

With a username like mine, I can't skip this week. I'm in.
Wolfram

Phobia posted:

Also, sure, why not? :toxx:
Bloody Aztec

Red Lotus

ollyd3000
Dec 1, 2014

THUNDERDOME LOSER

In

Mercedes
Mar 7, 2006

"So you Jesus?"

"And you black?"

"Nigga prove it!"

And so Black Jesus turned water into a bucket of chicken. And He saw that it was good.






It's a boy ya'll :3

Ironic Twist
Aug 3, 2008

I'm bokeh, you're bokeh


Let me be the first to say I hope he never becomes a goon.

Congrats, Merc!

newtestleper
Oct 30, 2003


Congratulations!

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010


Legit Cyberpunk







Inaugural babyprompt, for next 24 hours: "It's a boy", 100 words.

Mercedes
Mar 7, 2006

"So you Jesus?"

"And you black?"

"Nigga prove it!"

And so Black Jesus turned water into a bucket of chicken. And He saw that it was good.






It's a b-AUUUUGHHHHH

The mother was the first one to die. Spindly legs erupted from the vagina and dragged itself out into the world. The doctor took a step back, but slipped on blood. Baby boy leapt off the bed and did work. He held the entrails over his head like a makeshift mobile. Bodies pressed against the door in a frantic attempt at escape. Baby boy didn't care. He was happy with his new toys.

angel opportunity
Sep 7, 2004

Total Eclipse of the Heart

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007


BLO OD E M PR E SS

of

THUDNER-DOME







Mercedes posted:

It's a boy ya'll :3

Welcome to the world, Thunderbabby.

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010


Legit Cyberpunk







Now with PowerPunch Action!
71 words

Mercedes Cybercock, badass, stomped into the dirty bar and ordered a whiskey and a big cigar. "It's a boy!," he said, slapping it down on the bar.

Jim Cyberspaceman eyed it with his NanoEye. "It's a grapefruit."

Cybercock reached into his pants, unhitched his CyberDick with a click and a hiss, and slapped it down on the bar. "Yeah, the tech for babies is coming in the next rev."

autism ZX spectrum
Feb 7, 2007

by Lowtax


Fun Shoe

gently caress YOU BABY BITCHES THIS TINY-WEINY BLAST FROM THE PAST IS IN

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007


BLO OD E M PR E SS

of

THUDNER-DOME







Nubile Hillock posted:

gently caress YOU BABY BITCHES THIS TINY-WEINY BLAST FROM THE PAST IS IN

:eyepop: :eyepop: :eyepop:

The Saddest Rhino
Apr 29, 2009

Behold my brain the golden throne of my consciousness. In here I am seated. Shackled. From here I police the land.



Guys can I say I'm so glad Thunderdome is the only thing on Something Awful where there's a first goonbirth rather than a first goondeath

crabrock
Aug 2, 2002


not 100% sure cache cab didn't kill himself tbh

Liam Emsa
Aug 21, 2014

Oh, god. I think I'm falling.

Aw, drat I missed it by two hours.

edit: apparently it's midnight tonight instead, I'm in

Liam Emsa fucked around with this message at 07:35 on Dec 5, 2014

Martello
Apr 29, 2012

by XyloJW


Congrats Merc!

Jonked
Feb 15, 2005


Liam Emsa posted:

Aw, drat I missed it by two hours.

edit: apparently it's midnight tonight instead, I'm in
Greyhound

Black Russian

~9-ish Hours Left!!!!

Benny the Snake
Apr 10, 2012

GUM CHEWING INTENSIFIES


Mercedes posted:

It's a boy ya'll :3
Congrats, Merc! Me and fellow goon Broken Things will be signing up for your current MercBrawl. Hope there's still time and room for a perspective pair of godparents!

Mercedes
Mar 7, 2006

"So you Jesus?"

"And you black?"

"Nigga prove it!"

And so Black Jesus turned water into a bucket of chicken. And He saw that it was good.






Benny the Snake posted:

Congrats, Merc! Me and fellow goon Broken Things will be signing up for your current MercBrawl. Hope there's still time and room for a perspective pair of godparents!

First, thanks, second, Benny, I set up an arraigned marriage for you so both parties can participate. Instead you come to me with someone who hasn't even written a TD entry yet. I won't take an unknown into a brawl, sorry buddy. My original offer still stands, and if you can make it happen, you can participate.

autism ZX spectrum
Feb 7, 2007

by Lowtax


Fun Shoe

where's my goddamn drink assignment you idiots

Liam Emsa
Aug 21, 2014

Oh, god. I think I'm falling.

This is my first Thunderdome. So, I just post it in here when I"m done?

Jonked
Feb 15, 2005


Nubile Hillock posted:

where's my goddamn drink assignment you idiots
Buck's Fizz

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

J.A.B.C.
Jul 2, 2007

There's no need to rush to be an adult.




Liam Emsa posted:

This is my first Thunderdome. So, I just post it in here when I"m done?

A good rule is to bold the title, put in the word count then post the story, unless specified in the rules. There's lots of examples to review, but the format is mostly the same.

Other than that, welcome to the 'dome.

  • Locked thread