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  • Locked thread
Beef Turret
Jul 9, 2009

by Lowtax

their lil poopers posted:

don't be a dismissive little bitch

if he cant imagine a few natural sounding convos where "male" is used as a noun that's his problem

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Sancho
Jul 18, 2003

This club has some really fine rear end females.

So I've been talking to this female the last few days...

You see when you're trying to land a female, ...

Look at that female over there, is she looking at us?

Yeah these things are commonly said too.

Titty Warlord
Apr 28, 2013
friendl zone is a voluntary concentration camp

pixelbaron
Mar 18, 2009

~ Notice me, Shempai! ~
was hangin out wit my female yesterday and

Titty Warlord
Apr 28, 2013
http://vimeo.com/m/28466163

cool video

Moola
Aug 16, 2006

annoys me

sort out your loving appearance and lack of personality and maybe you stop getting rejected you lovely as loving goons

also



lol

Moola fucked around with this message at 15:34 on May 29, 2014

Chairchucker
Nov 14, 2006

to ride eternal, shiny and chrome

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2022




Well, the two statements aren't necessarily linked.

uncop
Oct 23, 2010
This thread has gotten a little stale so I'll create some content.

I'm sure I'd be ZergFluid 2 if I had landed on the chans or somewhere on "the manosphere" instead of SA, because I always found it natural to reduce people, even my closest friends, to charts and abstractions. When my abstraction and the real person clashed, it felt like the real person had gone crazy and would come around soon. Like every popular crazy virgin talked about here, I also thought that a girlfriend was something I deserved and some law of the universe would get me one as a counterbalance to my social isolation. It's simply the same just world belief that people apply to all kinds of ethically complex questions they don't understand. You know male gaze and other feminist critique of media. As a sperg I can say it's all true. Women absolutely do look like passive rewards to be earned, and if you're an autist or a narcissist or whoever who can't naturally relate to other people, even interacting with women personally doesn't fix the view since you're just looking at them from the outside, seeing a black box whose supposed input-output -combinations you've learned from mass media. I understand perfectly well why Elliot Rodger believed that girls should fall all over him just because he dressed expensively and drove a BMW. It's cargo cult socialization, it makes sense to the person doing it and doesn't automatically mean they're crazy or malicious. (Mr. I-should-kill-my-little-brother-so-he-can't-ever-surpass-me was definitely crazy and malicious though.)

The advice I see on SA is stuff like "talk to people", "be fun to be around", "learn to love yourself" etc. which I don't disagree with but they're abstract enough to sound like intentionally obtuse bullshit and ridicule to the truly socially impaired, which I think is why many will rather believe simplistic and logical-sounding MRA charts. Personally, I don't enjoy getting to know people or trying to have fun in groups of people I barely know (part of me) and bare acquaintanceships and being around a lot of people makes me anxious (probably fixable) so I've always preferred to skip the to more personal relationships. Apart from the internet, it also worked really well as a kid, but I got alienated as a teenager when the norms of meeting people changed, which was right around the time my bullying and social isolation ended. Past that moment I couldn't figure out how to spend time with people outside school and hobbies. I didn't figure out that parties were real and normal people drank alcohol until I was 17, bitter and frantically trying to make sense of a world I didn't understand.

On the other hand, I connected with several girls online, mainly through online games when I was a teenager, and found online interaction much more rewarding than real life interaction. I learnt I was ok, although I used to turn into a huge creep when I got infatuated with someone and thus lost contact with everyone except the one who's asexual and never has any flirt or that kind of stuff in her "voice". Nowadays though I find that the only new people interested in talking to me online are women barely older than back then, like 18 to my 22 (as opposed to 17 to my 15 or similar) and that's whe I realize I've made no progress in my life at all, except, thanks to SA, understood and thrown away my most glaring creepy habits. Not that it helps since now I'm instead overly self-conscious and eager to sever only to back down due to fear of loneliness, which people seem to like even less. Basically I (eventually) notice problems, but so far haven't internalized solutions that actually works. I can't really tell when something works, only when it fails spectacularly and there's no one to learn from. Note that I'm not looking for actual relationships online and never have, it's just that like 90% of the people who want to talk with me on the internet happen to be female.

Back to real life. Holy poo poo, I'm afraid of real women. They just trigger my fear of rejection like no other if they even look at me. There was one who I'd known online beforehand and that was no problem because I knew what she thought, but talking to people I don't intimately know, no way. Tbh I'm afraid of everyone that isn't a harmless-seeming nerdy white guy, including blacks, good-looking people, clearly extroverted people and so on. Obviously I sometimes have to interact with all kinds of people since I study, but I haven't had a relaxed and fun moment in years talking to new real-life people and I'm sure I leave the worst kind of first impressions. No social skills, lack of self-control due to anxiety and zero self-confidence.

I'm not specifically looking for a girlfriend, but I think it's the most likely way I'll find the friend and validation I crave for, since it's been easy to talk to women and at best they really like me too. But I often feel that I'm too far gone to actually become the person that can have even one real friend without it becoming a codependent mess. Welp, I hope I shed some light on some stuff this thread is about and my sad existence has brightened up someone's day.

Yes, I'm in therapy. My therapist is a respectable mental health professional but sadly not really a having-a-healthy-social-life professional.

Tezzeract
Dec 25, 2007

Think I took a wrong turn...

uncop posted:

The advice I see on SA is stuff like "talk to people", "be fun to be around", "learn to love yourself" etc. which I don't disagree with but they're abstract enough to sound like intentionally obtuse bullshit and ridicule to the truly socially impaired, which I think is why many will rather believe simplistic and logical-sounding MRA charts. Personally, I don't enjoy getting to know people or trying to have fun in groups of people I barely know (part of me) and bare acquaintanceships and being around a lot of people makes me anxious (probably fixable) so I've always preferred to skip the to more personal relationships. Apart from the internet, it also worked really well as a kid, but I got alienated as a teenager when the norms of meeting people changed, which was right around the time my bullying and social isolation ended. Past that moment I couldn't figure out how to spend time with people outside school and hobbies. I didn't figure out that parties were real and normal people drank alcohol until I was 17, bitter and frantically trying to make sense of a world I didn't understand.

I think you're devaluing your personal contributions.

The real moral of 'learn to love yourself' is that you don't have to take societal values as the objective function. What you choose to do with your life is subjective and if things aren't working out, you have the freedom to say gently caress it.

Part of being a nerd is that Star Trek owns D&D owns and WoW owns and you're own interests shouldn't be an object of shame. Having that kind of shame is just like being closeted and it makes life miserable.

So really try to find a community where you can contribute to and be a giver. I have a friend who was an active giver/teacher in his church and it made him into an object of desire for the ladies (and its not like he has a six pack and super masculinity) without him even meaning for it to happen. You can be constructive with your own experiences and knowledge too. Hope this helps.

Tezzeract fucked around with this message at 18:15 on May 29, 2014

Spanish Manlove
Aug 31, 2008

HAILGAYSATAN

uncop posted:

This thread has gotten a little stale so I'll create some content.

I'm sure I'd be ZergFluid 2 if I had landed on the chans or somewhere on "the manosphere" instead of SA, because I always found it natural to reduce people, even my closest friends, to charts and abstractions. When my abstraction and the real person clashed, it felt like the real person had gone crazy and would come around soon. Like every popular crazy virgin talked about here, I also thought that a girlfriend was something I deserved and some law of the universe would get me one as a counterbalance to my social isolation. It's simply the same just world belief that people apply to all kinds of ethically complex questions they don't understand. You know male gaze and other feminist critique of media. As a sperg I can say it's all true. Women absolutely do look like passive rewards to be earned, and if you're an autist or a narcissist or whoever who can't naturally relate to other people, even interacting with women personally doesn't fix the view since you're just looking at them from the outside, seeing a black box whose supposed input-output -combinations you've learned from mass media. I understand perfectly well why Elliot Rodger believed that girls should fall all over him just because he dressed expensively and drove a BMW. It's cargo cult socialization, it makes sense to the person doing it and doesn't automatically mean they're crazy or malicious. (Mr. I-should-kill-my-little-brother-so-he-can't-ever-surpass-me was definitely crazy and malicious though.)

The advice I see on SA is stuff like "talk to people", "be fun to be around", "learn to love yourself" etc. which I don't disagree with but they're abstract enough to sound like intentionally obtuse bullshit and ridicule to the truly socially impaired, which I think is why many will rather believe simplistic and logical-sounding MRA charts. Personally, I don't enjoy getting to know people or trying to have fun in groups of people I barely know (part of me) and bare acquaintanceships and being around a lot of people makes me anxious (probably fixable) so I've always preferred to skip the to more personal relationships. Apart from the internet, it also worked really well as a kid, but I got alienated as a teenager when the norms of meeting people changed, which was right around the time my bullying and social isolation ended. Past that moment I couldn't figure out how to spend time with people outside school and hobbies. I didn't figure out that parties were real and normal people drank alcohol until I was 17, bitter and frantically trying to make sense of a world I didn't understand.

On the other hand, I connected with several girls online, mainly through online games when I was a teenager, and found online interaction much more rewarding than real life interaction. I learnt I was ok, although I used to turn into a huge creep when I got infatuated with someone and thus lost contact with everyone except the one who's asexual and never has any flirt or that kind of stuff in her "voice". Nowadays though I find that the only new people interested in talking to me online are women barely older than back then, like 18 to my 22 (as opposed to 17 to my 15 or similar) and that's whe I realize I've made no progress in my life at all, except, thanks to SA, understood and thrown away my most glaring creepy habits. Not that it helps since now I'm instead overly self-conscious and eager to sever only to back down due to fear of loneliness, which people seem to like even less. Basically I (eventually) notice problems, but so far haven't internalized solutions that actually works. I can't really tell when something works, only when it fails spectacularly and there's no one to learn from. Note that I'm not looking for actual relationships online and never have, it's just that like 90% of the people who want to talk with me on the internet happen to be female.

Back to real life. Holy poo poo, I'm afraid of real women. They just trigger my fear of rejection like no other if they even look at me. There was one who I'd known online beforehand and that was no problem because I knew what she thought, but talking to people I don't intimately know, no way. Tbh I'm afraid of everyone that isn't a harmless-seeming nerdy white guy, including blacks, good-looking people, clearly extroverted people and so on. Obviously I sometimes have to interact with all kinds of people since I study, but I haven't had a relaxed and fun moment in years talking to new real-life people and I'm sure I leave the worst kind of first impressions. No social skills, lack of self-control due to anxiety and zero self-confidence.

I'm not specifically looking for a girlfriend, but I think it's the most likely way I'll find the friend and validation I crave for, since it's been easy to talk to women and at best they really like me too. But I often feel that I'm too far gone to actually become the person that can have even one real friend without it becoming a codependent mess. Welp, I hope I shed some light on some stuff this thread is about and my sad existence has brightened up someone's day.

Yes, I'm in therapy. My therapist is a respectable mental health professional but sadly not really a having-a-healthy-social-life professional.

I'm gay.

nomadologique
Mar 9, 2011

DUNK A DILL PICKLE REALDO
this thread got a lot more interesting after elliot rodger

Ponce de Le0n
Jul 6, 2008

Father jailed for beating 3 kids after they wouldn't say who farted in his car

uncop posted:

This thread has gotten a little stale so I'll create some content.

I'm sure I'd be ZergFluid 2 if I had landed on the chans or somewhere on "the manosphere" instead of SA, because I always found it natural to reduce people, even my closest friends, to charts and abstractions. When my abstraction and the real person clashed, it felt like the real person had gone crazy and would come around soon. Like every popular crazy virgin talked about here, I also thought that a girlfriend was something I deserved and some law of the universe would get me one as a counterbalance to my social isolation. It's simply the same just world belief that people apply to all kinds of ethically complex questions they don't understand. You know male gaze and other feminist critique of media. As a sperg I can say it's all true. Women absolutely do look like passive rewards to be earned, and if you're an autist or a narcissist or whoever who can't naturally relate to other people, even interacting with women personally doesn't fix the view since you're just looking at them from the outside, seeing a black box whose supposed input-output -combinations you've learned from mass media. I understand perfectly well why Elliot Rodger believed that girls should fall all over him just because he dressed expensively and drove a BMW. It's cargo cult socialization, it makes sense to the person doing it and doesn't automatically mean they're crazy or malicious. (Mr. I-should-kill-my-little-brother-so-he-can't-ever-surpass-me was definitely crazy and malicious though.)

The advice I see on SA is stuff like "talk to people", "be fun to be around", "learn to love yourself" etc. which I don't disagree with but they're abstract enough to sound like intentionally obtuse bullshit and ridicule to the truly socially impaired, which I think is why many will rather believe simplistic and logical-sounding MRA charts. Personally, I don't enjoy getting to know people or trying to have fun in groups of people I barely know (part of me) and bare acquaintanceships and being around a lot of people makes me anxious (probably fixable) so I've always preferred to skip the to more personal relationships. Apart from the internet, it also worked really well as a kid, but I got alienated as a teenager when the norms of meeting people changed, which was right around the time my bullying and social isolation ended. Past that moment I couldn't figure out how to spend time with people outside school and hobbies. I didn't figure out that parties were real and normal people drank alcohol until I was 17, bitter and frantically trying to make sense of a world I didn't understand.

On the other hand, I connected with several girls online, mainly through online games when I was a teenager, and found online interaction much more rewarding than real life interaction. I learnt I was ok, although I used to turn into a huge creep when I got infatuated with someone and thus lost contact with everyone except the one who's asexual and never has any flirt or that kind of stuff in her "voice". Nowadays though I find that the only new people interested in talking to me online are women barely older than back then, like 18 to my 22 (as opposed to 17 to my 15 or similar) and that's whe I realize I've made no progress in my life at all, except, thanks to SA, understood and thrown away my most glaring creepy habits. Not that it helps since now I'm instead overly self-conscious and eager to sever only to back down due to fear of loneliness, which people seem to like even less. Basically I (eventually) notice problems, but so far haven't internalized solutions that actually works. I can't really tell when something works, only when it fails spectacularly and there's no one to learn from. Note that I'm not looking for actual relationships online and never have, it's just that like 90% of the people who want to talk with me on the internet happen to be female.

Back to real life. Holy poo poo, I'm afraid of real women. They just trigger my fear of rejection like no other if they even look at me. There was one who I'd known online beforehand and that was no problem because I knew what she thought, but talking to people I don't intimately know, no way. Tbh I'm afraid of everyone that isn't a harmless-seeming nerdy white guy, including blacks, good-looking people, clearly extroverted people and so on. Obviously I sometimes have to interact with all kinds of people since I study, but I haven't had a relaxed and fun moment in years talking to new real-life people and I'm sure I leave the worst kind of first impressions. No social skills, lack of self-control due to anxiety and zero self-confidence.

I'm not specifically looking for a girlfriend, but I think it's the most likely way I'll find the friend and validation I crave for, since it's been easy to talk to women and at best they really like me too. But I often feel that I'm too far gone to actually become the person that can have even one real friend without it becoming a codependent mess. Welp, I hope I shed some light on some stuff this thread is about and my sad existence has brightened up someone's day.

Yes, I'm in therapy. My therapist is a respectable mental health professional but sadly not really a having-a-healthy-social-life professional.

Girls like it when you are concise

Tumblr of scotch
Mar 13, 2006

Please, don't be my neighbor.
The problem isn't necessarily with the term "female" inherently, although calling women "females" in general conversation is still kind of weird. The problem is that most of the people who do call women "females" in general conversation still usually refer to men as "men" or "guys" or "dudes." Like, my mother usually says male and female instead of man or woman in general conversation, which is weird, but it's at least consistent in using the clinical and detached terminology for both. But using "man" while also using "female" is inconsistent and carries the connotation that the person, on some level, sees men as people and women as not.

Zzulu
May 15, 2009

(▰˘v˘▰)
sounds like a lot of these virgins need to start drinking a lot of alcohol in places with a lot of people who have also had a lot of alcohol


alcohol is your friend, virgin. Let it wash over you and drown your anxiety and rinse your social retardation away

nomadologique
Mar 9, 2011

DUNK A DILL PICKLE REALDO
seriously if you haven't gotten laid yet now is the time for bad decisions.

you can make good decisions later.

Moola
Aug 16, 2006
*has a toxic personality and makes no attempt to fix appearance*

whyyyy wont anybodyyyyyy ahve seeeeeeex with meeeeeeeee?! :gonk:

Ponce de Le0n
Jul 6, 2008

Father jailed for beating 3 kids after they wouldn't say who farted in his car

Flagrant Abuse posted:

The problem isn't necessarily with the term "female" inherently, although calling women "females" in general conversation is still kind of weird. The problem is that most of the people who do call women "females" in general conversation still usually refer to men as "men" or "guys" or "dudes." Like, my mother usually says male and female instead of man or woman in general conversation, which is weird, but it's at least consistent in using the clinical and detached terminology for both. But using "man" while also using "female" is inconsistent and carries the connotation that the person, on some level, sees men as people and women as not.

:goonsay:

Gatts
Jan 2, 2001

Goodnight Moon

Nap Ghost

Ponce de Le0n posted:

Girls like it when you are concise

DTF? U want sum fuk? *sends dick pic*

pathetic little tramp
Dec 12, 2005

by Hillary Clinton's assassins
Fallen Rib

Gatts posted:

DTF? U want sum fuk? *sends dick pic*

Way too many words, I just like to send "D?" It's up to her if I'm asking if she's down or if she wants some dick.

Cnut the Great
Mar 30, 2014

Sancho posted:

This club has some really fine rear end females.

So I've been talking to this female the last few days...

You see when you're trying to land a female, ...

Look at that female over there, is she looking at us?

Yeah these things are commonly said too.

these phrases sound really loving weird and no one i know talks like that, and no (non-crazy) person in this thread has talked like that to my knowledge

that one poster used the word "female" in a context where it actually made sense and aided clarity, and then another poster sperged out because this is something awful where everyone's always on the lookout to shame and assert their superiority over others for doing innocuous things. that's basically it

Cnut the Great fucked around with this message at 22:38 on May 29, 2014

FoolyCharged
Oct 11, 2012

Cheating at a raffle? I sentence you to 1 year in jail! No! Two years! Three! Four! Five years! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Somebody call for an ant?

Benedick Cuckold posted:

these phrases sound really loving weird and no one i know talks like that, and no one in this thread has talked like that to my knowledge

That was the point. The guy directly copied someone's example of how nobody would use male because it sounds weird and replaced every instance with female. Turns out the dude in question just can't word.

messagemode1
Jun 9, 2006

Benedick Cuckold posted:

these phrases sound really loving weird and no one i know talks like that, and no (non-crazy) person in this thread has talked like that to my knowledge

that one poster used the word "female" in a context where it actually made sense and aided clarity, and then another poster sperged out because this is something awful where everyone's always on the lookout to shame and assert their superiority over others for doing innocuous things. that's basically it

https://twitter.com/ifinessinmoney/status/472133370722648064

https://twitter.com/laurenash__/status/472133115243421696

https://twitter.com/bestofaries/status/471826124881022976

https://twitter.com/trippydezz/status/472124134299009024

https://twitter.com/lilmrsspiffy/status/471892458171670528

Whatever just call everyone females inbd my BFF Jill.

Cnut the Great
Mar 30, 2014

these phrases sound really loving weird and no one i know talks like that, and no (non-crazy) person in this thread has talked like that to my knowledge

that one poster used the word "female" in a context where it actually made sense and aided clarity, and then another poster sperged out because this is something awful where everyone's always on the lookout to shame and assert their superiority over others for doing innocuous things. that's basically it

Who Is Paul Blart
Oct 22, 2010

Tezzeract posted:

I think you're devaluing your personal contributions.

The real moral of 'learn to love yourself' is that you don't have to take societal values as the objective function. What you choose to do with your life is subjective and if things aren't working out, you have the freedom to say gently caress it.

Part of being a nerd is that Star Trek owns D&D owns and WoW owns and you're own interests shouldn't be an object of shame. Having that kind of shame is just like being closeted and it makes life miserable.

So really try to find a community where you can contribute to and be a giver. I have a friend who was an active giver/teacher in his church and it made him into an object of desire for the ladies (and its not like he has a six pack and super masculinity) without him even meaning for it to happen. You can be constructive with your own experiences and knowledge too. Hope this helps.

Tezzeract posted:

I think you're devaluing your personal contributions.

The real moral of 'learn to love yourself' is that you don't have to take societal values as the objective function. What you choose to do with your life is subjective and if things aren't working out, you have the freedom to say gently caress it.

Part of being a nerd is that Star Trek owns D&D owns and WoW owns and you're own interests shouldn't be an object of shame. Having that kind of shame is just like being closeted and it makes life miserable.

So really try to find a community where you can contribute to and be a giver. I have a friend who was an active giver/teacher in his church and it made him into an object of desire for the ladies (and its not like he has a six pack and super masculinity) without him even meaning for it to happen. You can be constructive with your own experiences and knowledge too. Hope this helps.

Same

Moon Wizard
Dec 29, 2011

Benedick Cuckold posted:

these phrases sound really loving weird and no one i know talks like that, and no (non-crazy) person in this thread has talked like that to my knowledge

that one poster used the word "female" in a context where it actually made sense and aided clarity, and then another poster sperged out because this is something awful where everyone's always on the lookout to shame and assert their superiority over others for doing innocuous things. that's basically it

No, she mentioned using 'female' as a noun (as opposed to 'women' or as an adjective) was a pet peeve, which was a legitimate complaint in context. Then it devolved into a slap fight about whether or not people actually do that in real life or whether it happened to men too.

This argument is incredibly stupid. Don't use male or female as a noun when referring to people. TIA

nomadologique
Mar 9, 2011

DUNK A DILL PICKLE REALDO
psst (gestures come over here, whispers in your ear) females is "urban lingo" for pussy

Homura and Sickle
Apr 21, 2013
http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/tech/news/2002/04/01/fee-mail.htm

Cnut the Great
Mar 30, 2014

DaVideo posted:

No, she mentioned using 'female' as a noun (as opposed to 'women' or as an adjective) was a pet peeve, which was a legitimate complaint in context. Then it devolved into a slap fight about whether or not people actually do that in real life or whether it happened to men too.

This argument is incredibly stupid. Don't use male or female as a noun when referring to people. TIA

it was a dumb complaint in context because the original poster used it as a noun in a completely innocuous way, i.e. as a way to refer to both girls and women as a group

i suppose he could have literally said "girls and women", but there was no reason for him to because "female" isn't actually a misogynistic slur in all contexts except in the minds of weirdo hypersensitive internet people

you're right, this argument is incredibly stupid because people like you are being incredibly stupid about it

Homura and Sickle
Apr 21, 2013
everyone please enlist and tell the nearest nco your thoughts about using female as a noun at every opportunity and please shut the gently caress up about that goddamn word here

cuckold you aight imo

net cafe scandal
Mar 18, 2011

Benedick Cuckold posted:

these phrases sound really loving weird and no one i know talks like that, and no (non-crazy) person in this thread has talked like that to my knowledge


there are a fukton of black and hispanic teens and young adults that talk like that, bitch, use a facebook

Cnut the Great
Mar 30, 2014

net cafe scandal posted:

there are a fukton of black and hispanic teens and young adults that talk like that, bitch, use a facebook

sounds like ethnic minorities are pretty problematic

net cafe scandal
Mar 18, 2011

Benedick Cuckold posted:

sounds like ethnic minorities are pretty problematic

I'm savagely beaten by them nearly every day.

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A Keg
Jan 7, 2014

by Ralp
Happy Meltdown May

  • Locked thread