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Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.


Reboot Lara ranks among the worst protagonists I've ever played on the grounds she's not interesting, has no sense of humour, no depth or noticeable character-development, no empathetic backstory (My daddy's dead and I live in a mansion, boo hoo) and she falls into the white savior mold without irony. The self-pitying, endlessly bickering leads of GTA V and that loser-uncle from Watch Dogs are the only protagonists worse than her.

Pretty much every other decent protagonist has a memorable trait like: a thick North-Dublin accent, a fatal case of TB, a painful transition into a cyborg, looking like a member of Boyzone, or saying "Malaka" all the time.

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oldpainless
Oct 30, 2009

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You have to remember that Lara is British so she already lacks empathy and compassion for any living being.

Inspector Gesicht
Oct 26, 2012

500 Zeus a body.


oldpainless posted:

You have to remember that Lara is British so she already lacks empathy and compassion for any living being.

A fact us Irish know too well.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



oldpainless posted:

You have to remember that Lara is British so she already lacks empathy and compassion for any living being.

It's so disappointing we never got a sequel with her gleefully seizing control of an undead army and taking over the entire earth.

BioEnchanted
Aug 9, 2011

He plays for the dreamers that forgot how to dream, and the lovers that forgot how to love.
The best dialog in the Tomb Raider reboots in my opinion went to the first game's villain. I just love during the late game conversation where he just throws out "We're both survivors Lara! I've just been doing this a whole lot longer!" I also didn't mind some of Lara's dialog, like I loved "If it comes out of there and it isn't me or Sam, shoot it!"

Philippe
Aug 9, 2013

(she/her)

Inspector Gesicht posted:

Reboot Lara ranks among the worst protagonists I've ever played on the grounds she's not interesting, has no sense of humour, no depth or noticeable character-development, no empathetic backstory (My daddy's dead and I live in a mansion, boo hoo) and she falls into the white savior mold without irony. The self-pitying, endlessly bickering leads of GTA V and that loser-uncle from Watch Dogs are the only protagonists worse than her.

Pretty much every other decent protagonist has a memorable trait like: a thick North-Dublin accent, a fatal case of TB, a painful transition into a cyborg, looking like a member of Boyzone, or saying "Malaka" all the time.

Μαλάκα!

Lunchmeat Larry
Nov 3, 2012

oldpainless posted:

You have to remember that Lara is British so she already lacks empathy and compassion for any living being.
More like oldsixcountyless

Jestery
Aug 2, 2016

Eat a dick unicycle boy!
I recently got playing a sequel to the point and click game The Fall

The first one had this really compelling hook.
You are playing as the AI of a combat exosuit and your pilot is unconcious. Get the pilot to safety.

The twist sort of being that you are bound by the laws of robotics and need to engineer situations that establish a reason for you to unholster your pistol , or use abilities

It's a great idea and compelling enough to finish it.

The Fall 2 has you playing as the same AI that is physically locked to a location and you are metroiding your way through cyber space to inhabit other random robots ( army bot, Butler bot etc) and exploiting loopholes in their programming/scheduleding for...reasons...

It is significantly less compelling as a narrative device, and there are side on combat portions that just kinda suck . This is because the "combat" system has been lifted from the last where it was more about using your pistol to push a faraway button at the right time or as part of a prescribed stealth section. It's almost like monkey island meets Metroid in the worst way.

Also it's weirdly windowed on my machine and just uncomfortable to play.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Playing through MGS Peace Walker now, and man the resupply mechanic is annoying, at least where I am right now. You run into occasional boss battles against tanks and such, and occasionally their heavily-armored troop escorts, but the amount of ammo you need seems disproportional to what you can carry.

Two problems: first, I didn't even unlock the resupply option until after the first fight, and felt like it was only multiple tries and dumb luck that let me win. Even bigger, as far as I can tell, it's just a handful of randomly selected items regardless of what's in your inventory. Real annoying when I'm almost dead in an extended battle and I get no rations and the minimum possible amount of RPG ammo, along with some tea (which I specifically did not equip because I have never had a use for it so far). Thanks Kaz

muscles like this!
Jan 17, 2005


A problem with Minecraft Dungeons is how you never really feel like you're progressing in power because skills are randomized and attached to weapons so you can't rely on them.

Len
Jan 21, 2008

Pouches, bandages, shoulderpad, cyber-eye...

Bitchin'!


muscles like this! posted:

A problem with Minecraft Dungeons is how you never really feel like you're progressing in power because skills are randomized and attached to weapons so you can't rely on them.

People love that about PoE though

peter gabriel
Nov 8, 2011

Hello Commandos
I am currently enjoying video games and have no real complaints

Cleretic
Feb 3, 2010


Ignore my posts!
I'm aggressively wrong about everything!

peter gabriel posted:

I am currently enjoying video games and have no real complaints

That sounds awesome, I wish I had that.

Soul Calibur VI's create-a-character story mode makes one of the weirdest missteps I've ever seen in a character creator. When you first make the character, you have no control over their outfit, only the actual character. You get access to the full creator once you get into the actual game mode, so it's not even kept from you for long.

But the problem is that the default outfit they give you is a full suit of armor, which almost completely obscures the effect of body sliders. You need to make REALLY extreme changes to have any effect at all on the shape of full armor, so if you do that and then remove that armor, chances are you find you accidentally made a weird exaggerated cartoon character.

oldpainless
Oct 30, 2009

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peter gabriel posted:

I am currently enjoying video games and have no real complaints

hosed up if true

The Moon Monster
Dec 30, 2005

CJacobs posted:

Edit: Really that's an issue I held with all of the TR reboot games. They pretend to be about Lara becoming The Tomb Raider and struggling to maintain her innocence but they're not reeeealllyyy about that. That's just a pretense to give Lara stuff to do. Only occasionally does the writing remember "oh yeah heart of darkness Lara becoming numb to the killing or whatever" and when it does it falls flat.

I'm not sure this sort of plot is possible to do well in a game where the core gameplay is shooting dozens of guys in the head.

My favorite version of this is in Tales of the Abyss where after the first time the protagonist kills a human mook you get an optional skit where he angsts about having to kill people and then the entire cast, including the obligatory little girl with a huge weapon, chimes in about how great, healthy, and normal it is to kill lots of people.

Other than the optional skit there's absolutely no fanfare to Luke doing his first murder, either. You're probably just wandering around the overworld and get a random battle against "rogue mage" instead of "green slime" or whatever.

Inspector Gesicht posted:

Reboot Lara ranks among the worst protagonists I've ever played on the grounds she's not interesting, has no sense of humour, no depth or noticeable character-development, no empathetic backstory (My daddy's dead and I live in a mansion, boo hoo) and she falls into the white savior mold without irony. The self-pitying, endlessly bickering leads of GTA V and that loser-uncle from Watch Dogs are the only protagonists worse than her.

Pretty much every other decent protagonist has a memorable trait like: a thick North-Dublin accent, a fatal case of TB, a painful transition into a cyborg, looking like a member of Boyzone, or saying "Malaka" all the time.

Loser uncle has his iconic look that puts him above reboot Lara, imo.

The Moon Monster has a new favorite as of 13:28 on May 28, 2020

Lunchmeat Larry
Nov 3, 2012

in fairness to Watch Dogs guy I still mutter "Aiden Pierce's Iconic Hat" to myself prodromally at random intervals whereas I cannot remember a single memorable thing about new Lara

Veib
Dec 10, 2007


Lunchmeat Larry posted:

in fairness to Watch Dogs guy I still mutter "Aiden Pierce's Iconic Hat" to myself prodromally at random intervals whereas I cannot remember a single memorable thing about new Lara

:same:

It turned out to be very iconic, but not at all in a good way

Morpheus
Apr 18, 2008

My favourite little monsters

Lunchmeat Larry posted:

in fairness to Watch Dogs guy I still mutter "Aiden Pierce's Iconic Hat" to myself prodromally at random intervals whereas I cannot remember a single memorable thing about new Lara

"Lara Croft's Iconic Desire for so much Murder"

CJacobs
Apr 17, 2011

Reach for the moon!
Lara Croft's Iconic Dual Wielded Pistols

oh... she doesn't dual wield pistols a single time in the reboot series outside that one moment at the end of the first game?

oh...

Dewgy
Nov 10, 2005

~🚚special delivery~📦

Lunchmeat Larry posted:

in fairness to Watch Dogs guy I still mutter "Aiden Pierce's Iconic Hat" to myself prodromally at random intervals whereas I cannot remember a single memorable thing about new Lara

“I’m coming for you, you BAHSTARDS :black101:

She does have some occasional great VO work.

Doctor Spaceman
Jul 6, 2010

"Everyone's entitled to their point of view, but that's seriously a weird one."

Lunchmeat Larry posted:

in fairness to Watch Dogs guy I still mutter "Aiden Pierce's Iconic Hat" to myself prodromally at random intervals whereas I cannot remember a single memorable thing about new Lara
The lesbian subtext in the first game was cool, then they did nothing with it.

Ugly In The Morning
Jul 1, 2010
Pillbug

Dewgy posted:

“I’m coming for you, you BAHSTARDS :black101:

She does have some occasional great VO work.

I love when you get the grenade launcher and every enemy mook browns their trousers at the same time. That was so satisfying.

Strom Cuzewon
Jul 1, 2010

CJacobs posted:

Lara Croft's Iconic Dual Wielded Pistols

oh... she doesn't dual wield pistols a single time in the reboot series outside that one moment at the end of the first game?

oh...

You spend the whole first game only using one of the pistols, and then the mentor dude with the other pistol dies, and you think that this is gonna be the moment when you get to dual wield, and then you never do.

IIRC you even take his pistol!

oldpainless
Oct 30, 2009

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It’s actually extremely difficult to dual wield pistols with any type of accuracy not to mention it would make reloading more difficult so I appreciate the realism in the game.

CJacobs
Apr 17, 2011

Reach for the moon!
This is accurate in Max Payne 1 where your accuracy while dual wielding is pretty crap compared to one-handing, but by Max Payne 2 they realized who cares and Max can now essentially dual wield laser beams. Max Payne 3 continues this trend to the point where you can dual wield two different guns and they're both exactly as accurate as one-handing. :blastu:

Just Offscreen
Jun 29, 2006

We must hope that our current selves will one day step aside to make room for better versions of us.
I wish there was a t-rex like in TR 2.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Just Offscreen posted:

I wish there was a t-rex like in TR 2.

In retrospect, dinosaurs would've been a solid way to get out of the "more of the same" trap the third new one really suffered from.

Just Offscreen
Jun 29, 2006

We must hope that our current selves will one day step aside to make room for better versions of us.
Thats true for most games.

RareAcumen
Dec 28, 2012




Lunchmeat Larry posted:

in fairness to Watch Dogs guy I still mutter "Aiden Pierce's Iconic Hat" to myself predromally at random intervals whereas I cannot remember a single memorable thing about new Lara

It's a good thing they rebooted it and fixed so many of the problems. There's less enemy variety, most people don't seem to enjoy the story, you have less ways to move around the environment, less ways to jump and dodge, and they nixed Lara's gigantic chest in this series about fighting mummies and dinosaurs with handguns.

...Hey wait a minute, everything about this sounds like it sucks.

Just Offscreen posted:

Thats true for most games.

Since we know that a lot of dinosaurs had feathers that means that the ones without them are fantasy monsters. They should be in every game now.

Kennel
May 1, 2008

BAWWW-UNH!
Dinosaur enemies suck.

Big ones: bullet sponges
Little ones: annoying fast assholes

Lobok
Jul 13, 2006

Say Watt?

Kennel posted:

Dinosaur enemies suck.

Big ones: bullet sponges
Little ones: annoying fast assholes

I think for the TR reboot series they would need to make a fight against a T-Rex some kind of big setpiece fight where you're using unconventional weapons or things in the environment

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Kennel posted:

Dinosaur enemies suck.

Big ones: bullet sponges
Little ones: annoying fast assholes

I have not played enough games featuring dinosaurs to evaluate this broad-reaching of a judgment, I require more.

Zanzibar Ham
Mar 17, 2009

You giving me the cold shoulder? How cruel.


Grimey Drawer

Captain Hygiene posted:

I have not played enough games featuring dinosaurs to evaluate this broad-reaching of a judgment, I require more.

You probably ran into plenty of flying dinosaurs, they tend to make you fall down pits.

Kennel
May 1, 2008

BAWWW-UNH!

Lobok posted:

I think for the TR reboot series they would need to make a fight against a T-Rex some kind of big setpiece fight where you're using unconventional weapons or things in the environment

IIRC Anniversary made it a combination of a bullfight boss and QTE.

rydiafan
Mar 17, 2009


Kennel posted:

IIRC Anniversary made it a combination of a bullfight boss and QTE.

So every boss in Arkham Asylum?

Byzantine
Sep 1, 2007

Otoh, Byzantine armor sets and Greek fire arrows.

Leal
Oct 2, 2009

CJacobs posted:

Lara Croft's Iconic Dual Wielded Pistols

oh... she doesn't dual wield pistols a single time in the reboot series outside that one moment at the end of the first game?

oh...

Shoulda went with Lara's Iconic Breast Cancer. Imagine the shock and drama that would unfold onscreen by a vulnerable Lara Croft.

My Lovely Horse
Aug 21, 2010

They could have eventually recast her as a modern day amazon what with the bow and arrow.

muscles like this!
Jan 17, 2005


So it turns out that whoever was responsible for making the "Definitive Edition" of Mafia 3 screwed up the game. Unlike Mafia 2 there wasn't supposed to be any changes made to the actual game itself but somehow they removed the coding that makes the game run better on a PS4 Pro/Xbox One X.

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Smirking_Serpent
Aug 27, 2009

i've been watching someone stream Mafia 2 Definitive and it's hilarious. In one major dramatic cutscene, the eye models got all screwed up and everyone was just constantly looking off to the left.

i mean, it would be lame if I paid for it, but I cracked up.

definitely seem like screwed up ports.

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