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I put this up recently, it's a really awful novella that me and a few friends wrote. It's basically low-brow toilet humour fantasy. I'm not sure if the blurb can be improved any. Probably? GLORY. HONOUR. LARGE WORDS. One man must forego these luxuries and begin an epic quest filled with danger, peril, redundancy, and sodomy. One man must brave the uncertainties of a world filled with men, because it was written by men who are afraid of women. One man must set aside right and wrong, and do what needs to be done. When sidekicks can't be trusted – when captured princesses aren't worth the hassle – when you're in the toilet and you've forgotten your smart phone – only one man can be relied upon to handle the situation: BON'JELLAR: HERO OF ORDEGRON On a journey to rescue a princess, an unlikely hero is determined to conquer any obstacle he may encounter – including the princess. Bon'Jellar, the Prince of Ordegron travels far and wide in pursuit of acquiring new skills, meeting resistance at every turn and finding himself in perilous situations. Along the way, the seemingly incompetent warrior battles kidnappers, warlords, and Bon'Jellar's cleverly disguised arch-nemesis, Ulcerman.
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Feb 18, 2015 00:40
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Imperfect posted:I guess I wouldn't have understood that it was supposed to be absurdist fantasy if you hadn't hinted at it before the blurb. The blurb needs to be a lot more ridiculous in order to indicate that, otherwise it just looks like kind of off-kilter fantasy. Thanks, I'll try and have a poke around it and see if I can get anything better out of it. The first half of the blurb was written by one of the guys who wrote the book with me, and the second half was written by someone on Fiverr after giving them the plot details.
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Feb 18, 2015 21:37
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Had another go at a blurb, but it's still ploppy. "In the kingdom of Ordegron, the vulgar Princess Spendalot has been kidnapped by an incompetent warlord known only (for some reason) as Chubs, and the malodorous antagonist, Ulcerman, is plotting similarly nefarious deeds. Unfortunately, the only man for the job is the narcissistic Prince of Ordegron, Bon’Jellar BonWinkle. What begins as a routine princess-rescue soon becomes a bewildering adventure into the unknown."
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Mar 4, 2015 23:11
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