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 Most Recent Update: Update 04: Some Grinding, Then Some Fisting https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LXpE3JdprWs  Still doing the file-name joke thing. Maybe one of these days I'll actually finish an LP with it. Hi, I'm Poison Mushroom, formerly Colon V, and I'm going to be doing a Let's Play of a game that I love. And as is LP Subforum tradition, since someone else has already done this game much better than I ever could, I'm going to be using a dumb gimmick in an attempt to make it more interesting! What? I'm very partial to informative screenshot LPs, but I have absolutely no chance in hell of doing that for this game better than Orange Fluffy Sheep did almost four years ago. There is nothing that I can say that hasn't been said already. If that's what you're looking for, check out that LP, because it is A) phenomenal and B) not at all what you're going to get here. In fact, I'll be summarizing cutscenes rather than fully presenting them, as even if I did, it'd basically just be a copy-and-paste of OFS' LP. So, what's the gimmick? Let's be honest. Aside from the Deep Dungeon, FFTactics is not a difficult game once you know its quirks. In the years since its release, all kinds of bizarre challenges have been come up with, and stomped flat. I... have neither the time nor the inclination to run one of them. Nor do I care to chronicle my suffering through one of the several 'make this game ball-bustingly hard' versions that are floating around. (FFTactics 1.3 being the most famous one.) Instead, I'll be doing something that should add some challenge to the game, while keeping things relatively interesting both to play and to read. The rules I'll be imposing upon myself for your amusement are as follows.
How do I get in on this bullshit? Submissions are currently closed, but the link is here. If you want to see what else is coming up, or know when it's your turn to die in your first battle, you can find the list of corpses and soon-to-be corpses here. This list will contain unmarked spoilers for future updates, as it's also one of my personal resources for keeping track of everything. Spoilers? Code Green. Even the remake of this game has been out for a long time, so I'm not going to get bent out of shape if you mention that, say, Gafgarion is a duel boss that utterly wrecks a lot of unprepared players. If you're worried about spoilers, I'd really recommend scrolling up, clicking the link to OFS' LP, and reading that. You'll get a hell of a lot more out of the experience than you will with this. Anything else? Updates may or may or may not be sporadic, depending on how things go, but I'll be trying to get one full update in every two weeks, or every month at the latest. girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 18:15 on Jun 16, 2014 |
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Jun 8, 2014 04:12
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Main Updates Update 00: Start-To-Save Time, 20 Minutes Update 01: This Update Ends With Me Trying To Sing A Jock Jams Song Via Text -Micro-Update 01 Update 02: I Strongly Dislike Argath Update 03: I Break My Own Rules And Someone Dies Update 04: Some Grinding, Then Some Fisting girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 18:16 on Jun 16, 2014 |
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Jun 8, 2014 04:12
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Links Orange Fluffy Sheep's much better FFTactics LP J. Alfred Prufrock's ongoing FFTactics 1.3 LP Betting Pool Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Character or Location Specific
Fanart Hahaha. Maybe. girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 15:58 on Jun 28, 2014 |
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Jun 8, 2014 04:13
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This post may contain spoilers for in-progress updates! Current as of: Update 04 Roster of the Living A list of the in-game names, genders, and classes of the current roster.
Tribute to the Fallen A memorial for those who have died because of PoisonMushroom's incompetence.
girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 18:21 on Jun 16, 2014 |
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Jun 8, 2014 04:13
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You'll need to put in through the form, so I can get it all in one place, but... 
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Jun 8, 2014 04:26
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Just got enough input to confirm my decision to Call falling down death and Replace the generics ASAP. Applications are still open, but that section of them is being removed. Now to work on an update instead of my actual job. Gyre posted:Signed up. I always wanted to get into FFTactics, but the PSP version runs super slow (I remember Cure's animation taking forever) and the PS version has a terrible translation. Is there any fan version that combines the best of both worlds?  .
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Jun 8, 2014 05:00
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Ciaphas posted:gently caress, I knew there was one. That's even more thematically appropriate given the job of a Commissar, too. Should I redo the application to say Mediator, Poison Mushroom, or does it matter? EvilUrchin posted:Hmm, since everyone and their brother is apparently jumping on the White Mage train, would switching be an option Poisonous Mushroom? If not that's cool, I'm fine with what I initially went with. Might wanna change my preferred job to Lancer though if I may.
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Jun 8, 2014 05:51
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Kaboom Dragoon posted:Signed up. Are you going for the optional dungeons and crap as well? I want to see how many fall to the Deep Dungeon and its horrors therein. Edit I'll probably be closing applications pretty soon here, at least for a while. This is filling up remarkably quickly, and I have no idea how long it will take me to burn through. girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 06:26 on Jun 8, 2014 |
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Jun 8, 2014 06:24
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Aaaand closing the sign-ups for now. They may or may not open back up quickly, but 34 is probably enough for the time being.
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Jun 8, 2014 08:04
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Update 00: Start-To-Save Time, 20 Minutes I cannot recommend enough that if you care about the story at all, you stop reading this and go read through OFS' LP of this game. This really is a very cool and intricate plot (for the first two thirds) and it's a very fun game that just happens to have been played to death and have some rather blatant balance... quirks.  TL;DR, though, it's a fantasy War of the Roses. Rich old white guys waging war over which one of them gets to be the richest old white guy while this rich YOUNG white guy grows up. The narrator talks about a dude named Delita who history says is a hero, and a dude named Ramza who history says is a villain, and then implies that this might not be the whole truth.  I went back and forth on what to name the main character. Ramza would be faithful, and less narcissistic than naming the main character after myself...  But then I realized that with a 14-character maximum, I could just barely fit my whole username. Probably would have used a pun instead if I could think of one.  Used my own birthday, too, because why not. (Also, Capricorn is good for going on the offensive with some of the bosses.)    A 3D PS1 cutscene that probably took dozens if not hundreds of manhours in 1997, summarized in 3 images.   Princess Ovelia. She's kinda important to this whole 'war of succession' business. She's also not super happy about being passed around like a "Get onto the throne free" coupon, but that doesn't come up for a while.  Gaffgarion is a character who could have all his dialogue replaced with "Look how evil I am, I'm going to kick a puppy next chance I get" and very little would change.  Female Knight #3 limps in to warn everyone that bad guys are coming. Everyone rushes outside for the tutorial battle.  There's a tutorial battle.  It's over quickly.   But the battle was a distraction, and Ovelia is being dragged off by Delita, a young man who is implied by the narrator at the start to maybe not be quite as much of an upstanding dude as history makes him out to be. He immediately works to dispel this notion by sucker punching a princess and then kidnapping her.  The original translation for this line is the source of the thread title.  The prologue is now only half over, so I'm gonna skip quickly through the second half.     It's always baffling to me that history seems to be full of rich folks paying people to get really good at killing other people, then being surprised when those people, after not being paid, try to kill them instead.   Lots of talking about what this bodes for the knights-to-be.   Turns out the answer is 'Okay, we're gonna put all the recruits in one place to protect our flank, and really really hope that nobody in charge notices how green you all are. But first, go kill some deserters.'  And with that, the game can be saved. Start-To-Save is an informal measurement of 'how long after I start this game can I save', and thus A) start actually playing, and B) skip all the intro crap next time. FFTactics clocks in at just about twenty minutes, which is actually really good for a Final Fantasy game, to be honest. This piece of trivia brought to you by the fact that I have no idea what else to talk about. Next Update: Some assholes nobody cares about. girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 00:56 on Jun 12, 2014 |
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Jun 8, 2014 08:33
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Was going to work on the update more, then realized I've been putting off actual work. Way too much. Whoops. Looks like Hankosa's gonna be a Geomancer, though.
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Jun 8, 2014 09:33
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TKMobile posted:I've been kinda wondering this for awhile, but given how broke the original FFT was and that someone can crack and change it to be more balanced, is it still hard to use the FFT engine, "fixed" or not, to just make an entirely new game? Admittedly, it would be scads harder to do with a PS1 game than make some sort of Zelda or Mario hack, but I've been curious if any fans have thought to actually do this especially since the Advance Tactics games have gone off in their own direction.
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Jun 11, 2014 17:04
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Update 01: This Update Ends With Me Trying To Sing A Jock Jams Song Via Text As will often be the case, the save point is immediately followed by the mission intro. If you don't know what you're doing, or accidentally proceed with the plot while all your guys are naked, or whatever, you can kind of end up painting yourself into a corner. Two bosses in particular are notorious for ending runs of single-file savers who don't know they're coming.  OFS did plenty of talking about game mechanics, and I'm operating mostly under the assumption that all my readers already know the game well (or at least his LP), so instead I'll be breaking up the screenshots with tactical decisions, challenge run trivia, personal comments, and other nonsense that generally has no business taking up main update space.    There isn't really much to TL;DR on this scene. Some nameless bandits/deserters/inexplicable Cockney accents are fleeing and attack pretty much immediately.  As the first "real" mission, this fight is pretty toothless. With tall terrain on both sides, and shallow water in the middle, the most irritating foe on this map is actually the camera, and it can sometimes take several adjustments to get a proper view of what you're trying to accomplish. The water can lead to a reckless first-time player getting boxed in and whacked about if they rush forward without thinking, but even then you've still got an AI companion in Delita to bail you out.  Left to his own devices, Delita will beeline for the nearest enemy and whack him or her, often stealing a kill (and valuable experience) from one of your own units. If you know at all what you're doing, he's kind of more trouble than he's worth right now. The only real exception is solo Ramza runs, where you have neither force to bring to bear, nor access to any kind of healing. Even then, it's more 'don't be stupid and pick them off individually' than 'actual challenge'.  I whack him because A) guests can't actually die, B) he's a killstealing son of a taint, and C) I have reasons for wanting to leave certain enemies alive.  With Delita out of the way and no real reason (or way) to be cautious, the fight proceeds pretty quickly.    Poor Rolfe here is technically the first casualty of the LP, but since none of these guys will still be around by the end of the update, I'm not too torn up about it.  Uninterrupted by Delita, I can take down the Squires one by one and give myself/Ramza the killing blow once or twice for the extra bit of XP.   I end up using a couple potions just to make sure I have enough guys to accomplish the thing I want to.   One Chemist in particular proceed to be rather persistent in undoing my damage, but I have to keep him alive for the time being, so I tolerate it.  Eventually, dudes start dying off and crystalizing. The ability crystals I don't care so much about as there's only some very basic Squire and Chemist skills at stake here, and Ramza's going to be getting bleedover XP out the rear end in those classes.  What is important, on the other hand, are the cheap equipment items they drop from chests if they don't become a crystal. Everything they drop, I've got at least as good of, but for what I want to do after this battle, I wanna grab all the money I can.   Once that point is reached, a bit of very basic AI manipulation gets me the last Chemist trapped in a corner, where he can weaponlessly flail at a couple of my dudes while I wait for the last of the items to drop.  Total profit: 1 Clothes, 1 Dagger, 1 Potion skill for Ramza, 1 completely useless HP/MP refill for the same. Totally worth the extra ten minutes it took to make all that happen.    Chemist doesn't live long after that.  Ramza, a pampered son of one of the most respected noble families in recent history, doesn't understand why anyone would turn to a life of crime. Why not just stop being poor?    Spoils: 2500 Gil, a fancy knife, and a couple items I failed to get in that last screen cap but was too lazy to go back to get again.  That out of the way, we're booted to the world map, where proceeding even one spot forward will trigger another plot battle. Before that happens, I have some... downsizing to do.   Like my predecessor before me, I sell some high-cost low-utility items for an extra bit of scratch, as well as the equipment I strip off my generic units before booting them out the door. Unlike OFS, I also sell all my Phoenix Downs. Total, I walk away with right around 8500 gil. This is enough to do what I'm trying to do with room to spare.  And that means it's time to get some new allies.   The first is a young man who's as brave as can be, and who thus will be very good at Fisting things some day soon. His name is Fister Roboto.   Ice Mallet picks up the role of our first female Chemist, who will probably make for a very good White Mage except for that I've been basically ignoring zodiac signs, and later realize she has poor compatibility with Ramza and some of the others. Whoops. Too late now!   A Cancer upon the forums, EvilUrchin is a brave and godless man who dreams of one day being the first human to enter the mesosphere without aid of a catapult.   Orcs+Ostriches will be spending a lot of time in dresses on his path to becoming a bard.  KalonZombie rounds out the pack as another Monk-to-be, and has the distinction of being the first submitter to request a cross-job ability. The request is summarily rejected.  Proper jobs are granted, equipment is bought and given, Delita is stripped as well, and I reluctantly realize what having to pass up JP Boost for my generics will mean for the speed my units will reach high-tier classes. (Spoiler: Significantly slower.) Instead, all three Squires and Ramza are granted Stone for that little bit of extra JP opportunity. The Chemists get Potion and nothing else. I realize I forgot to buy any.  Ramza's Squire class being special, I have less qualms about giving him JP Boost for a while. Though he also has the capability to become a Knight or Archer, there's no equipment for it. I spend another few minutes dicking around in the class screen, but the base of the work has been done, and we're basically ready to move on to the game proper. Ladies and gentlegoons, please put your hands together for the opening lineup!  Banuh-nuh nuh-nuh NUH NUH  Na nuh-nuh nuh-nuh NUH NUH  Y'all ready for this?  Nuh nuh nuh na-nah nah na-nah na-nah  Nah nah na-nan-ah NAHNAH  Buh tuh tuh-tuh-tuh-tuh-tuh TUH TUH  YEAH Next Update: Mandalia Plains. Someone is fairly likely to die. girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 11:35 on Jun 12, 2014 |
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Jun 12, 2014 00:54
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Micro-Update 01 I unforgot. Chances of death: Slightly less likely.
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Jun 12, 2014 01:35
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Aishlinn posted:I pretty much know the answer to the question already, but i'll ask anyway. If you get to the point where poaching becomes viable, what's your rules on the Chantagne? Gologle posted:You let Rolf die you bastard. Corvinus posted:A Capricorn Ramza with two worst compat males and a bad compat female, the only saving grace being those Cancers have good compat with the Scorpio.
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Jun 12, 2014 01:49
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I guess it does just save some grinding. Alright, sure. JP Up is the exception.
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Jun 12, 2014 02:50
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girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 22:13 on Jun 14, 2014 |
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Jun 12, 2014 03:04
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Spoiler while I work on the update: Somebody died! Edit Someone get this thread to Page 3 so I don't drop 3 updates on the same page. girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 18:57 on Jun 13, 2014 |
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Jun 13, 2014 18:23
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Trollhawke posted:Placing a bet that 20 people will be dead before chapter 2. Ice_Mallet posted:Well, I bet there will be no more than than 5 deaths by chapter 2. I'm an optimist(?). Trollhawke posted:Also, I'd like to ask a question: Aishlinn posted:I'm assuming some amount of grinding will still need to be done, to keep the team roughly in line with Ramza, to avoid an unwinnable battle against a chocobo squad
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Jun 13, 2014 23:59
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Schwartzcough posted:So, a slightly interesting tidbit that may or may not have been covered in the OFS thread: Generics you hire in the "Warrior's Guild" (I have to get used to these WotL names) have their Brave and Faith values randomly rolled between, I believe, 40 and 70. However, random units you encounter in battles, and the generics you start with, seem to have a +4 added to their Brave/Faith values. So you'll somewhat frequently see your starting generics have 71-74 ratings, while you'll never get anything that good from the recruitment center. That can actually be a pretty substantial difference in challenge runs, so some people may do a lot of resetting at the first battle until they get a good set of starters.  to edit it into the last one.Update 02: I Strongly Dislike Argath  We begin the update with a very dramatic and important cutscene that is most certainly not being completely undermined by me forgetting my cursor on the screen. Nope, not distracting at all.  This cutscene has a lot of important characters, but it goes basically exactly how you expect a "father dying, gathers his children who can't quite seem to get along" scene to go, so I can use it as an excuse to get in some necessary infodump instead.  Barbaneth Beoulve is one of, if not the most famous hero of the Fifty Years War. Dude basically turned the whole war around for Ivalice. In a more optimistic story, he would be the protagonist. Instead, he's now on his deathbed from illness at the twilight of a war that's been raging his entire adult life.  Zalbaag is following in his father's footsteps as a great leader of men. The war is finally winding down, and he's proven to be almost as kick-rear end of a general as his dad, but also much more pious, even among people for whom belief in god is a goddamn game mechanic. Dude's really loving religious.  Dycedarg is a powerful spellcaster and swordsman, and is the eldest Beoulve son. While Zalbaag got his father's piety and leadership, Dycedarg got his ferocity and capability to Get Things Done. He's also old enough to be working an administration now under Duke Larg rather than fight himself. The name '50 Years War' is not an exaggeration, though the twelve-year gap between Zalbaag's birth and his probably doesn't help. You get the impression that Bar didn't really have a lot of free time with his wife while leading the armies. And on that note...  Alma is the youngest Beoulve, but is only Dycedarg's and Zalbaag's half-sister. She and Ramza were born from Barbaneth's second marriage. 'Second marriage' in this case being a polite euphamism for "Barbaneth stuck it in a peasant woman while on a campaign, and then legitimized it later". Ramza is basically Jon Snow, if Catelyn Stark hadn't been around to glare at Ned. This is not the last time you'll hear me make a Game of Thrones reference.  With everyone introduced, I can cut into TL;DR mode for the rest of the cutscene. Foreign invaders. poo poo sucks. But the war's ending, as all the people who started it are getting old, and the giant piles of money they had to throw away at it is running out. On his deathbed, Barbaneth gathers his children. No mention is ever made of the fate of either of his wives, so it's probably safe to assume 'death by  Barbaneth's last words are to his youngest son, Ramza. He says he knows he's going to be a great knight, and begs him to honor the family name, and to keep his trust in Delita. Very worth noting, Barbaneth adopted Delita and his sister. Ramza may be illegitimate, but he's still of noble blood. Delita and Tietra are commoners. Basically everybody who isn't a Beoulve is pissed about this.  So, of course, Barbaneth's last act was to leverage his position and being a dying hero to get Delita into the Akademy. He dies telling Ramza to watch out for his sister, and to show his older brothers what it means to be a knight. Right in front of them. Regardless of whatever morally questionable acts they may perform in the future, that's kind of a dick move, Barbaneth.  Oh, thank God, cutscene over, back to the game.  Our route to the castle where we're supposed to be sitting on our asses and protecting the army's flank passes through Mandalia Plain, a place remarkably full of monsters and bandits for being a day's walk from the castle. Things got ugly at home while the war was going on.  Arrival throws us immediately into a battle. Pretend you're surprised.  A second guest means we're limited to 4 this time, so I bring Ramza, Fister Roboto, Orcs+Ostriches, and Ice Mallet.    Some blonde guy's been ganged up on by bandits, and we arrive just in time to save his life. Unfortunately.   1. +10 Brave to everyone present, mission becomes kill everyone. 2. +10 Faith to everyone present, mission becomes to protect the NPC. Considering that A) he's kind of surrounded, B) Brave is way more important for Ramza and Fister, and C) gently caress Argath, I go with option 1.   Also, D) Ramza turns the snark up to maximum power.  The mission itself is pretty simple if you don't have to keep Argath alive. There's about four Squires, a Thief with randomized skills, and a Red Panther, a monster that's irritatingly fast and has Counter, but it otherwise not especially dangerous.  The real goal in this mission is to get everyone up to Job Level 2 so I can go into the next battle with some actual classes.   This is accomplished primarily through friendly fire.  Argath sabotages my attempts to draw out the battle.  And also my attempts to let him get himself killed.     Ramza throws stones, and Orcs and Ice throw potions to get some extra JP.  Oh, right, Counter is irritatingly-likely to trigger on monsters. You should remember this, because I didn't.  The mission otherwise goes uneventfully, except Argath steals like four loving kills, including the last two of the mission.  The prize is something like 700 Gil and a couple potions. Whoo.  "Bluh bluh bluh, I'm Argath, you've got to help the Marquis, he's been kidnapped by the Corpse Brigade, abloo bloo bloo."  His name is Argus in the original translation, which I think is a kind of better-sounding name, but for consistency, I'm calling him Argath.We agree to take him to the castle and tell our brothers about it. Short aside/reminder, the Corpse Brigade are the knights who got so sick of not being paid that they're trying to stage a people's revolt to depose the nobility. It's not really working yet, but it's quickly becoming a thorn in the side of everyone powerful, and rapidly gaining more support among the people.  Before any more plot advancement, though, we have a couple upgrades to do.  Ice Mallet becomes a White Mage as requested, and will be the Queen Of Keeping These Assholes Alive for a good time coming (I hope). She learns Cure and... doesn't have the JP for much else yet, though I'd rather like to get her Esuna as soon as she has the MP to cast it with some regularity. Holy is also a goal, but that's more 'long-term', since it takes 56 MP to cast. Her current maximum is about a third of that.  Part of my plan to get Orcs to Bard quickly is spillover JP from the other caster(s), so while Ice Mallet is slowly feeding him White Mage JP, he becomes a Black Mage, and learns Blizzard and Thunder.  Fister picks up JP Up as well. A bit strange considering he won't be a Squire for very long, isn't it?  And last but not least, Argath gets stripped of all his equipment and turned into an Archer. Killstealing gently caress.  Immediately following is another cutscene. Dycedarg is not the ruler of the castle, that would be Duke Larg, but he is, essentially, his right-hand man. News of the Corpse Brigade taking the Marquis has apparently already reached his ears, and he says he's already ordered Zalbaag to lead a squad to get him back. If they've still got him alive, he says, they should expect a ransom note soon. He also takes a moment to completely shut down Argath's begging to be allowed to come along.   This leads directly into another dramatic cutscene and another poorly-placed mouse cursor. Argath's family used to be as respected as the Beoulve's, but after his grandfather turned traitor during the war and (which was was exposed by a common squire), the whole family's been on the edge of disgrace since. Dude's clearly both resentful towards the common folk for what he feels is their part in his family's disgrace, and very desperate to get back in the good graces of the nobility. This is basically his entire character motivation put into a thesis statement. Argath is one of the few characters in Tactics who can be called unequivocably selfish and evil, and some of his later actions this chapter can seem really pointlessly antagonistic if you don't understand why he's doing them. In short, remember this scene.  Then Alma, Tietra (Delita's sister, if you remember), and Zalbaag show up. Tietra and Alma are going to the same school, and everyone has a nice moment of catching up with family while Argath stands around awkwardly like the weird emo kid that nobody really likes.  Then the plot catches back up, as Zalbaag lets slip news that the Corpse Brigade has indeed sent a ransom note. While Dycedarg was completely unsurprised by the Corpse Brigade taking the marquis hostage for money, Zalbaag feels like something's off about the situation, as it's contrary to all their previous actions and motivations. Argath disagrees.  Zalbaag ignores him completely ( ), and mentions that he had a spy in the Corpse Brigade that he hasn't heard back from, and that it sure would be great if someone would head off to Dorter in the east to see what happened to him. His last words over his shoulder before he departs are "Guarding a castle is dreadfully dull... wouldn't you agree?" He leaves, and everyone says their goodbyes, but Alma pulls Ramza aside for a moment to confide in him that Tietra's putting on a brave face for her brother, but it's actually very rough for her at school. She's getting all the same crap for being a commoner that Delita is, but without Ramza there to stand up for him. Ramza puts his faith in Alma to watch out for her, and Alma urges Ramza to remember that he's a person, too, not just a Beoulve. They depart, and an ominous wind  The path to Dorter is open, but the road is long, and I am a moron. But this update's already running a little long, and there's a lot to cover before we reach Dorter. Next Update: Someone dies! girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 22:26 on Jun 14, 2014 |
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Jun 14, 2014 22:09
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Update 03: I Break My Own Rules And Someone Dies We return where we left off, at Eagrose Castle. But before we do any shopping or head any farther ahead, I want to get some of our front-liners up a bit in skill.  First chance, we get a random encounter in Mandalia Plain. It's the first of many locations where we can have random encounters, and thus the first of many spots I will be returning to over and over again for grinding.  We get five for these, and Fister Roboto has all the Squire XP he's going to need. Everyone else, however, has something to gain from being in their current class, so EvilUrchin, kalonZombie, Orcs+Ostriches and Ice Mallet join me for my first random battle. It could be two weak monsters, it could be four Chocobo. No way to know.   And the foe is...  A Goblin and a Red Panther. Well, then, that's easy. No possible way this could go wrong.  Due to some dumb positioning on my part, Ice is stuck behind a rock away from everyone else, so the advance is slowed for a turn or two while she goes around.     Operation "Gain JP through low-risk friendly fire" is go. One of these days, one of these hits is going to critical, and I'm going to have it eternally preserved that I killed one of my own dudes because I wanted another 10 JP.  Kalon goes mano-y-mano with the Red Panther, who opens by getting a critical hit.  Evil Urchin comes in for the rescue, with me thinking a Side attack will prevent a Counter.  It does not. "Okay," I think, "So Counter triggers from the front, which I knew, and the side, which I know now. Surely, it won't also come from the back!  "  Spoiler: It does. "Well, okay, he's still alive, we've still got some guys who get turns before the Goblin, just gotta get over there and-"   Our first casualty comes from a random loving encounter.    It's almost insulting how uneventfully the rest of the battle goes. Some dudes wail on each other, Ice heals them up, they wail on each other some more, Ice runs out of MP.  Kalon crystalizes, and I move in so that his sacrifice might live on through me (in other words: FREE SQUIRE XP). And his crystal provides... an HP/MP refill. Ramza's HP and MP were full.   Finally, I get tired of my own humiliation and have enough JP to go ahead and have Orcs completely flatten the goblin. KalonZombie's life was worth a grand total of 600 Gil, by the by.  I scurry back to Eagrose to lick my wounds.    On the bright side, Orcs got enough JP to become eligible for Time Mage, so it's time for some job changes. Orcs becomes a Time Mage, Urchin becomes an Archer (unfortunately), and Fister hits Knight, becoming the first competent melee fighter in this poor party.  He also keeps JP Boost. I've quickly realized that catching new folks up to the group is going to be awful as it is, even more so if they're stuck as a Squire or Chemist forever. So, I will be breaking my own rules, and JP Boost will be allowed on anyone (and in fact, put it on Mallet and Orcs between this update and the next). Deal with it.   I'm short on cash, so I can't do much shopping, unfortunately. Fister still gets some better armor and a shield, and Urchin gets his Bowgun, so he can at least pretend to contribute in this really awkward stage of development. After a bit of thought, Fister also gets the boots stolen from Argath. He seems the least likely to suddenly keel over and lose them forever when he dies.  The trip back to Gariland is uneventful, but now I am prepared. This will be the last time I lose anyone to poor preparation and tactics! ...oh, who am I kidding, we're all going to die. Next Update: Screenshots without a distracting and unprofessional cursor!
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Jun 15, 2014 00:52
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Also, I went back to check on the "surrender or die in obscurity line". It's been replaced, but I like the replacement almost as much.
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Jun 15, 2014 10:09
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Spoiler for next update: Some Grinding, Then Some Fisting
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Jun 16, 2014 13:34
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Update 04: Some Grinding, Then Some Fisting When we last left off, we had a Knight with no Break Skills, a Time Mage with only Haste, a White Mage with no Holy, and an Archer. Ahead of us is a mission with several Bombs, monsters that will gleefully explode and kill everyone if you can't manage to kill them in one turn.  I think it's time we do some grinding. (Side note for those who don't know: Most of the battles in the game scale by the level of your strongest dude. What we're going after here is JP, and an equalizing of levels, not necessarily XP.)  After Kalon's death, I only have five dudes currently, so everyone is present for this battle.   Mandalia Plain is the only place available for random battles right now, and it's inhabited by Red Panthers, which we know, Goblins, generic monsters who are annoying purely because they have  Battle's pretty dull. Some people punch and hit each other with sharp sticks for extra JP. It's not worth the images it'd take to portray. The objective of the grinding is two-fold. First, get Urchin out of Archer and into Thief, a class which has at least a small bit of practical application. The second is to get Orcs to Summoner Level 2 where he can trivialize the next story battle with a single spell (hopefully). As he needs to be a level 4 summoner to be a Bard, and he did say "whatever support", I take that as free license to twist his progression path however I need to in order to keep him alive long enough to become the second-worst class in the game.   On his second attack of the battle, though, Fister Roboto starts what's going to be a trend this update by completely loving obliterating the first Goblin with a critical hit and knocking off 75% of his HP in one attack. That gives him enough JP to gain a Job Level (and thus eligibility for Monk) from it. This is literally the only other interesting thing to happen this battle, so I'll skip ahead.   Second and third battles, even less interesting than the first one. With one exception.   Nobody can seem to lay a finger on Fister.  In fact, even being near him seems to carry the effect over.  Also, Monk damage is completely absurd this early in the game. That's Fister doing as much damage with a regular attack as he did before with a critical.  And then dodging the resulting counterattack. I don't know how much is Zodiac, how much is luck, and how much is just the insanity that is early-game Monks, but Fister is out to make a name for himself. Maybe it's because he's punching for two now.   I then trap the last Goblin in a corner and mug him a few times for extra JP until I get bored and Fister punches him in the head with 100% accuracy despite being loving blinded. Final results of three battles:  Fister is a Monk and gets Lifefont for extra survivability.  Ramza grows fat on the giant pile of Squire XP he's collected.  I buy Ice Mallet Raise out of force of habit, then realize I just wasted 200 JP.   EvilUrchin isn't an Archer any more.   And Orcs has the only Summon he'll ever need.  And everyone gets fancy new digs with all the gil from the battles. As no one is currently a knight, that means Plumed Hats and Leather Clothes for all (except Fister who neither needs nor wants any of your dumb headwear).  I save purely in case of tech issues, and not at all because I suspect my witty plan will backfire horribly and get everyone killed by angry Bombs.   And on that optimistic note, the next plot battle awaits!  As confident as I am in my evil plot, there's very little a Thief can contribute to this fight, so only Fister Roboto, Ice Mallet (hallowed be her name) and Orcs+Ostriches join me for this one.   Welcome to the Siedge Weald, a battle with a heaping helping of monsters and a completely unpronounceable name.  Argath is upset about monsters, and Delita is just happy to be on screen again.  Some background might be required for this. The goblins and the Panther are nothing new. Sure, a couple of them are the slightly stronger Purple variety, but it's an incremental increase. The real issue are the Bombs. Bombs, and their stronger cousins Grenades and Exploders are Fire-element monsters that use their ability Self-Destruct to blow up on everyone in two spaces if they feel like it and they have low health. This deals about 30 Fire damage, an amount you can probably survive if you keep an eye on your health and have decent levels or gear. However, it also gives you Oil, a condition that makes further Fire attacks deal even more damage. It's not uncommon if you're reckless and don't coordinate your damage to have one bomb go off, knock some guys down, and then have the second one explode and take even more guys out.  As this would be rather devastating, I have a two-step plan for dealing with these bastards. Step 1, allow several monsters to group together around the kamikaze NPCs.  Step 2: Shiva. Those of you who know the game well may have already seen my mistake. For those who haven't: Bombs are levitating Fire-element monsters, immune to Fire and Earth, but weak to Water.  Shiva deals Ice damage. Bombs resist Ice. All I've done is piss the bastard off. I rush forward to try and kill him off, but it's too late.   He, predictably, explodes in my loving face.  Ironically, my haste to fire off Shiva actually ends up saving me. With only one Bomb damaged enough to want to explode, the surviving monsters are too busy munching on It's at this point that I throw fancy, self-important tactics out the window and decide to just wail on everyone left before they can do me any more harm.     Fister Roboto happily obliges.  The spoils this time, 1800 Gil and a valuable lesson about making sure you've got your elemental interactions correct before you try to exploit them. Next Update: Dorter Trade City! 
girl dick energy fucked around with this message at 18:14 on Jun 16, 2014 |
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Jun 16, 2014 18:12
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Mak0rz posted:I guess this is as good a thread to ask as any...
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Jun 17, 2014 01:33
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CT5Holy with an item that absorbs Holy damage is one of the most mindless ways to break the game in half, actually.
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Jun 17, 2014 08:53
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I've been sick and lazy, so haven't been working on another update yet. Instead, I've been playing through another file for shits and giggles. And I ended up coming up with some kind of goofy builds, including a Samurai with Leap and Doublehand flying through the air and cutting dudes in half (Doublehand and Leap's bonus for spears doesn't stack, sadly), and a very sad realization that you can't dual-wield guns. I also gave Tactics 1.3 an attempt and I can say with no shame that I will never, ever be able to beat it, and anyone who does should immediately be institutionalized. The first random battle of the game put me up against a level 9 thief, a level 5 thief, two level 6 bombs and a level 7 Chocobo. It's not quite as bad as, say, Kaizo Mario 64 where a bunch of new obstacles are thrown at you without any thought, and in fact a lot of work went into giving you new tools to deal with all the issues. Unfortunately, though, it looks like even the "easy mode"/"content" version of the mod just turns off boss level scaling. Ah, well. So much for that. v  v
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Jun 19, 2014 12:46
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Prism posted:Actually it exists though I can't speak for how up to date it is; I also recommend not hanging around the forums for too long. But it does exist.
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Jun 19, 2014 19:30
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It's not dead, my life is just a mess right now.
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Jun 28, 2014 00:22
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Bifauxnen posted:A bit late, but I only just found the LP and this had me laughing hysterically. Especially since it was completely unintentional. Also, adding the 1.3 LP to the OP.
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Jun 28, 2014 15:57
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Dr. Buttass posted:Really? Nerts. And I went to all the trouble to look up what they even had too. Uuh...move to change my guy to dragoon then?
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Jun 30, 2014 02:53
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| # ¿ Apr 16, 2024 10:46 |
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I'm putting this LP on the backburner until I move in two weeks. Not to say there won't be an update any time soon, just that it's rather low on my priority list until I have a new place to live.
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Jul 19, 2014 10:25
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