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Rick
Feb 23, 2004
When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.
From the pool of most talked-about free agents, you will select who signs where, and the order of signings (if a player signs with the same team for the purpose of making it simple if the signings are announced the same day it can be considered at same time, we don't need to work out salary cap orders or anything; you also don't need to make the salary work or anything but you probably won't win if you don't!)

The main pool of free agents will be Lebron, Wade, Bosh, Melo and Pau. You can select an additional bonus free agent of your choice and assign them too.

Three points for correct stating the destination and order, two points for the destination, one point for the order.

Example:

1. Lebron announces that he is playing for the Lakers.
2. Pau announces he is going to play for the Hawks.
3. Bosh announces that he is going to Houston.
4. Melo announces he is going to Dallas.
5. Wade announces he is going to the Hornets.
6. Marshon Brooks announces he is going to the Heat.

You have until Woj announces a deal in principal for one of the four players in the pool to enter.

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Metapod
Mar 18, 2012
1. Lebron to Cleveland
2. Bosh to Houston
3. Pau to OKC
4. Melo to Knicks
5. Wade to Miami
6. Hayward stays in Utah

Metapod fucked around with this message at 05:18 on Jul 9, 2014

Lockback
Sep 3, 2006

All days are nights to see till I see thee; and nights bright days when dreams do show me thee.
No $10 gift card this time? I guess I'll go with fun answers and not realistic ones.

1. Lebron goes to Cleveland
2. Bosh goes to Houston
3. Melo goes to New York
4. Wade goes to Miami
5. Pau goes to Chicago
6. Chandler Parsons stays in Houston

Eltoasto
Aug 26, 2002

We come spinning out of nothingness, scattering stars like dust.



1. Melo announces he is staying with the Knicks
2. Wade announces he is staying with the Heat
3. Bosh announces he is staying with the Heat
4. Lebron announces he is staying with the Heat
5. Lance announces he will make them dance, in Charlotte :(
6. Pau announces he is taking his talents to OKC

homphgomph
Nov 23, 2007

So that's what that feels like
I'll go for some long shots here

1. Lebron to Cleveland
2. Bosh to Houston
3. Pau to OKC
4. Melo to Chicago
5. Wade to Miami
6. Paul Pierce to the Clippers

MOVIE MAJICK
Jan 4, 2012

by Pragmatica

Lockback posted:

No $10 gift card this time? I guess I'll go with fun answers and not realistic ones.

1. Lebron goes to Cleveland
2. Bosh goes to Houston
3. Melo goes to New York
4. Wade goes to Miami
5. Pau goes to Chicago
6. Chandler Parsons stays in Houston

Those are not the realistic answer?

Vanilla Mint Ice
Jul 17, 2007

A raccoon is not finished when he is defeated. He is finished when he quits.
1. Melo signs with the Knicks
2. LeBron waits until the Knicks get rid of Amare and signs with them
3. Bosh signs with Houston
4. Wade signs with Utah for the max, the only team and fanbase that realizes his true value
5. Pau signs with the Knicks using the exception
6. Eric Bledsoe signs with Miami
7. Nick Young signs with CBA for 5m 1year
8. Paul Pierce signs with Lakers for 10m 2years
9. Chip Engelland signs with Golden State

Vanilla Mint Ice fucked around with this message at 14:22 on Jul 9, 2014

Dejan Bimble
Mar 24, 2008

we're all black friends
Plaster Town Cop
I assume the big 3 are coming back to Miami, but that's boring, so let's imagine something more fun.

1. Lebron announces that he is playing for the Bulls.
2. Pau announces he is going to play for the Grizzlies.
3. Bosh announces that he is going to Houston.
4. Melo announces he is going to Heat.
5. Wade announces he is going to the Heat.
6. Eric Bledsoe signs with Detroit
7. Greg Monroe signs with Phoenix.
8. Luol Deng signs with the Heat
9. Lance Stephenson signs with Dallas
10. Chandler Parsons signs with Dallas
11. Paul Pierce signs with Charlotte
12. Gordon Hayward signs with Lakers
13. Evan Turner signs with OKC
14. Shawn Marion signs with Cleveland
15. Trevor Ariza signs with Washington
16. Vince Carter signs with Cleveland
17. Nick Young signs with Clippers
18. Rodney Stuckey signs with Lakers
19. Jameer Nelson signs with Detroit
20. Andray Blatche signs with Chicago
21. Greivis Vasquez sign with Dallas

Dejan Bimble fucked around with this message at 05:42 on Jul 9, 2014

Please Eat A Vegetable
Jun 26, 2002
Lord of Primate Booty
1. Lebron to Knicks
2. Wade to Hornets
3. Bosh to Bulls
4. Melo to LA
5. Love to LA
6. Pau to Minnesota
*bonus: Deng to Mavs


^^^drat. Now that's an offseason.

Please Eat A Vegetable fucked around with this message at 05:35 on Jul 9, 2014

Rick
Feb 23, 2004
When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.
1. Melo to Knicks
2. Lebron to Heat
3. Wade to Heat
4. Bosh to Heat
5. Bledsoe to Lakers
6. Gasol to Lakers

Intruder
Mar 5, 2003

WYA posted:

Those are not the realistic answer?

Probably not. The big 3 aren't leaving I'd bet

Lebron signs with Miami
Wade signs with Miami
Bosh signs with Miami
Carmelo signs with New York
Parsons signs with Houston
Gasol signs with OKC

Rick
Feb 23, 2004
When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.

WEREWAIF posted:

I assume the big 3 are coming back to Miami, but that's boring, so let's imagine something more fun.

1. Lebron announces that he is playing for the Bulls.
2. Pau announces he is going to play for the Grizzlies.
3. Bosh announces that he is going to Houston.
4. Melo announces he is going to Heat.
5. Wade announces he is going to the Heat.
6. Eric Bledsoe signs with Detroit
7. Greg Monroe signs with Phoenix.
8. Luol Deng signs with the Heat
9. Lance Stephenson signs with Dallas
10. Chandler Parsons signs with Washington
11. Paul Pierce signs with Charlotte
12. Gordon Hayward signs with Lakers
13. Evan Turner signs with OKC
14. Shawn Marion signs with Dallas
15. Trevor Ariza signs with Dallas
16. Vince Carter signs with Dallas
17. Nick Young signs with Clippers
18. Rodney Stuckey signs with Cleveland
19. Jameer Nelson signs with Detroit
20. Andray Blatche signs with Chicago

It's strange but somehow I think Dallas would not win more games even with all that movement.

Dejan Bimble
Mar 24, 2008

we're all black friends
Plaster Town Cop

Rick posted:

It's strange but somehow I think Dallas would not win more games even with all that movement.

I changed it just before you quoted me so that they don't double up on shooting guards.

I think they could easily end up with Greivis Vasquez at pg, trade Monta for a big man, and so trot out Vasquez/ Stephenson/ Parsons/Dirk/ random Shot blocker or brandan wright lineups and be a better offensive team and a bit better on defense as well. They probably don't have the cap room, but they can sort it out. People will facilitate if they're not going for the big fish.

Dejan Bimble fucked around with this message at 05:48 on Jul 9, 2014

Intruder
Mar 5, 2003

If Parsons leaves Houston without it being for something like a Kevin Love trade I may be signing with the local mortuary

Metapod
Mar 18, 2012

WEREWAIF posted:

I assume the big 3 are coming back to Miami, but that's boring, so let's imagine something more fun.

1. Lebron announces that he is playing for the Bulls.
2. Pau announces he is going to play for the Grizzlies.
3. Bosh announces that he is going to Houston.
4. Melo announces he is going to Heat.
5. Wade announces he is going to the Heat.
6. Eric Bledsoe signs with Detroit
7. Greg Monroe signs with Phoenix.
8. Luol Deng signs with the Heat
9. Lance Stephenson signs with Dallas
10. Chandler Parsons signs with Dallas
11. Paul Pierce signs with Charlotte
12. Gordon Hayward signs with Lakers
13. Evan Turner signs with OKC
14. Shawn Marion signs with Cleveland
15. Trevor Ariza signs with Washington
16. Vince Carter signs with Cleveland
17. Nick Young signs with Clippers
18. Rodney Stuckey signs with Lakers
19. Jameer Nelson signs with Detroit
20. Andray Blatche signs with Chicago
21. Greivis Vasquez sign with Dallas

Why would you do something as horrible as to put Evan Turner on the thunder in your imaginary nba world? What did Oklahoma City do to deserve a punishment that evil.

Dejan Bimble
Mar 24, 2008

we're all black friends
Plaster Town Cop

Metapod posted:

Why would you do something as horrible as to put Evan Turner on the thunder in your imaginary nba world? What did Oklahoma City do to deserve a punishment that evil.

They stole their team from Seattle and played Kendrick Perkins and Derek Fisher incredible minutes in the 2014 playoffs So I assume that any player they add will be just as ugly to watch.

Cash Monet
Apr 5, 2009

1. No one to the Wizards.

roundmidnight
Jul 9, 2010
1. Melo to the Knicks.
2. LeBron to the Cavs.
3. Bosh to the Rockets.
4. Wade re-signs in Miami.
5. Gasol to Chicago.
6. Ariza to Washington (I dunno, wanted to get one right)

Drunk Canuck
Jan 9, 2010

Robots ruin all the fun of a good adventure.

My obviously professionally done shot in the dark

1. Melo re-signs with NYK
2. Wade re-signs with Miami
3. Bosh signs with Houston
4. Marion signs with Utah
5. Pierce signs with Phoenix
6. Deng signs with Boston
7. Gasol signs with OKC
8. LeBron signs with Lakers
9. Fredette signs with Charlotte
10. Greg Oden signs with Cleveland
11. Ed Davis signs with Toronto

Homestar Runner
Oct 9, 2012

This is the best videogame
I have ever played!
1. Lebron to Phoenix
2. Melo to Phoenix
3. Bosh to Houston
4. Wade to Miami
5. Pau to Chicago
6. Jameer Nelson to Lakers

Punkin Spunkin
Jan 1, 2010
1.) LeBron to Cleveland.
2.) Wade to Charlotte.
3.) Bosh to Houston.
4.) Melo to New York.
5.) Pau to New York.
6.) Paul Pierce to Miami.

:)

Paulocaust
Jan 29, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
LeBron to Miami
Bosh to Miami
Wade to Miami
Melo to Houston
Pau to Lakers
Carter to Toronto

D_I
Aug 31, 2004
1. Lebron to Miami
2. Wade to Miami
3. Bosh to Miami
4. Melo to Knicks
5. Pau to Spurs
6. Parsons signs offer sheet with Mavs, Houston matches
7. Bledsoe to Suns
8. Deng to Suns
9. Lance Stephenson to Lakers

Truther Vandross
Jun 17, 2008

1. LeBron to Cleveland
2. Bosh to Houston
3. Wade stays in Miami
4. Melo to Lakers
5. Bledsoe to Lakers
6. Deng to Miami
7. Pau to OKC
8. Ray Allen to Cleveland
9. Parsons to Dallas
10. Danny Granger to a doctor's office

pylb
Sep 22, 2010

"The superfluous, a very necessary thing"
1. Lebron to Miami
2. Bosh to Miami
3. Wade to Miami
4. Melo to Chicago
5. Pau to Chicago
6. Deng to Dallas
?. Vesely to Europe

rare Magic card l00k
Jan 3, 2011


1. LeBron to Cleveland.
2. Wade to Cleveland.
3. Bosh to Cleveland.
4. Melo to Cleveland.
5. Pau to Cleveland.
6. Jermaine O'Neal to Cleveland.

Geriatric Pirate
Apr 25, 2008

by Nyc_Tattoo
1. Pierce to Nets
2. LeBron to Miami
3. Bosh to Houston
4. Wade to Miami
5. Pau to Spurs
6. Melo to Chicago

Bush Did Outer Heaven
Jan 18, 2005

The Sweetest Payne
1. Vince Carter to the Mavs
2. Carmelo to the Knicks
3. Pau to the Lakers
4. LeBron to the Heat
5. Wade to the Heat
6. Bosh to the Heat

Let the status quo commence. I hope pretty much anything other than this happens though.

The B_36
Jul 10, 2012
1. Gasol to Toronto.
2. Bosh is intrigued by Gasol's out of the blue decision, sits down with Ujiri and is wowed by his GM'ing skills, and decides to return to TO like the prodigal son .
3. Lebron follows his good friend Bosh out of a sense of camaraderie and fellowship, signs w Toronto for the veteran minimum to win rings and take his brand truly international.
4. Melo is confused by these shocking developments, and accidentally signs with the Shenzen Tigers of the Chinese Basketball League while on his annual pilgrimmage to the country to get his picture taken with a panda bear.

After all this, its pretty obvious how the dominoes fall for all the other minor free agents, so I won't bother going thru any more.

Edit: fine, one more: Wade retires, lives a very happy and fulfilling life in excellent physical health, passing away peacefully in his bed surrounded by friends and family at 109 years old, just to further piss off the people who called him a whiny flopping injury faker all these years.

The B_36 fucked around with this message at 14:58 on Jul 9, 2014

Jay Carney
Mar 23, 2007

If you do that you will die on the toilet.
1. Lebron to Miami
2. Bosh to Miami
3. Pau to OKC
4. Melo to Knicks
5. Wade to Miami
6. Luol Deng to Miami
7. Derrick Rose to ICU

hellzno
Jan 15, 2008

Primo
1. Lebron to Cleveland
2. Bosh to Houston
3. Wade to Miami
4. Melo to Knicks (really think 1-4 are simultaneous...)
5. Pau to OKC
6. Carter to Raptors
7. Pierce to Clippers
8. Deng to Miami

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

Take me to your Shida

1: LeBron goes to Cleveland
2: Bosh goes to Houston
3: Wade stays in Miami
4: 'Melo goes to Miami
5: Pau goes to OKC
6: Evan Turner goes to Minnesota

Spacebump
Dec 24, 2003

Dallas Mavericks: Generations
1. Vince Carter to the Mavs
2. Carmelo to the Knicks
3. Pau to the Lakers
4. LeBron to the Heat
5. Wade to the Heat
6. Bosh to the Heat

The exact same picks as Terry Glenn.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l0MBHKAjI2c

Spacebump fucked around with this message at 17:49 on Jul 9, 2014

Juaguocio
Jun 5, 2005

Oh, David...
1. Lebron stays in Miami
2. Bosh stays in Miami
3. Wade stays in Miami
4. Ray Allen stays in Miami
5. Pau stays in LA
6. Melo stays in New York

Thrills. Excitement.

SamuraiFoochs
Jan 16, 2007




Grimey Drawer
1. LeBron stays in Miami.
2. Bosh stays in Miami.
3. Wade stays in Miami.
4. Melo stays in New York.
5. Pau goes to OKC.
6. Parsons' offer gets matched by Houston and he stays there.

I think this free agency is going to be unbelievably anticlimactic.

General Dog
Apr 26, 2008

Everybody's working for the weekend
1) Rip Hamilton to Charlotte (via trade)
2) Jimmer Fredette to New Orleans
3) Epke Udoh to Detroit
4) Chancey Billups to Houston
5) Donald Sloan to Charlotte (via trade)

Rick
Feb 23, 2004
When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.
And entries are closed!

Everyone with Lebron James goes to the Cavs first has three points.

Juaguocio
Jun 5, 2005

Oh, David...
I've never been happier to be wrong.

SamuraiFoochs
Jan 16, 2007




Grimey Drawer

Juaguocio posted:

I've never been happier to be wrong.

This.

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Homestar Runner
Oct 9, 2012

This is the best videogame
I have ever played!

Homestar Runner posted:

1. Lebron to Phoenix
2. Melo to Phoenix
3. Bosh to Houston
4. Wade to Miami
5. Pau to Chicago
6. Jameer Nelson to Lakers

um so what do I win

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