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Drifter
Oct 22, 2000

Belated Bear Witness


Soiled Meat

Glaucus atlanticus posted:

I'm watching season 2 out of pure spite.

If you truly hate yourself, there are ways to end your pain forever, not prolong it.

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maxidious
Sep 25, 2007

Meh


Is this show worse than Helix?

Well at least Helix didn't have the annoying Granny.

Generic American
Mar 15, 2012

I love my Peng




Helix is, I think, technically worse, but as far as entertainment goes, I definitely enjoyed it more than The Strain. I mean, at least I could laugh at Helix and have a good time with how bad it was. The Strain, on the other hand, is just a painful slog with the occasional bright-spot that just gets buried beneath the poo poo before it can even breathe.

etalian
Mar 20, 2006



Generic American posted:

Helix is, I think, technically worse, but as far as entertainment goes, I definitely enjoyed it more than The Strain. I mean, at least I could laugh at Helix and have a good time with how bad it was. The Strain, on the other hand, is just a painful slog with the occasional bright-spot that just gets buried beneath the poo poo before it can even breathe.

It's different sort of bad unlike Terra Nova or Revolution. Sort of the bad were it never gets to be so horrible and over the top that somehow becomes entertaining.

Justin Credible
Aug 27, 2003

happy cat




They're trying too hard in some areas, trying to make it too emotional for the wrong things, trying to have a silly level of levity in other places and trying to be a serious action thing and end-of-the-world scenario without ever letting you feel that the world is actually ending, because everything is so locally focused and they don't bring the characters to places where the wider scope of everything could be taken in. It just shifts tones so much and when it combines with the crummy actors that get an inordinate amount of screen time and inconsequential things like how the wife got turned and her 'journey' when all she ends up being to the plot is another kind of antagonist.. well it just turns into this big hot mess. It's like a KFC famous bowl but not nearly as delicious when you're stoned.

etalian
Mar 20, 2006



Justin Credible posted:

They're trying too hard in some areas, trying to make it too emotional for the wrong things, trying to have a silly level of levity in other places and trying to be a serious action thing and end-of-the-world scenario without ever letting you feel that the world is actually ending, because everything is so locally focused and they don't bring the characters to places where the wider scope of everything could be taken in. It just shifts tones so much and when it combines with the crummy actors that get an inordinate amount of screen time and inconsequential things like how the wife got turned and her 'journey' when all she ends up being to the plot is another kind of antagonist.. well it just turns into this big hot mess. It's like a KFC famous bowl but not nearly as delicious when you're stoned.

things like Terra Nova were like the KFC sandwich made with 2 chicken filets instead of bread.

Things like not having consistent tone, plot direction and also not having the production money to really sell the end of the world feel really hurt the show.

Drifter
Oct 22, 2000

Belated Bear Witness


Soiled Meat

etalian posted:

things like Terra Nova were like the KFC sandwich made with 2 chicken filets instead of bread.

Things like not having consistent tone, plot direction and also not having the production money to really sell the end of the world feel really hurt the show.

Money's not the issue. You can do a lot with a little and sell it well. They're just not trying.

etalian
Mar 20, 2006



Drifter posted:

Money's not the issue. You can do a lot with a little and sell it well. They're just not trying.

Not having any good characters is another deal breaker

bull3964
Nov 18, 2000

DO YOU HEAR THAT? THAT'S THE SOUND OF ME PATTING MYSELF ON THE BACK.




I lost it when one of the vamps let out the wilhelm scream when it was cut down in the bar standoff.

CODChimera
Jan 29, 2009





Generic American posted:

Helix is, I think, technically worse, but as far as entertainment goes, I definitely enjoyed it more than The Strain. I mean, at least I could laugh at Helix and have a good time with how bad it was. The Strain, on the other hand, is just a painful slog with the occasional bright-spot that just gets buried beneath the poo poo before it can even breathe.

Yeah agreed. Helix was way more entertaining than this.

DarklyDreaming
Apr 4, 2009

Welcome to Disney XD Everyone!

CODChimera posted:

Yeah agreed. Helix was way more entertaining than this.

I think of The Strain as the kind of show that could be saved by just one more re-write or slightly stricter editorial control, which makes watching it frustrating, because its flaws have relatively easy fixes but the writers don't do anything to make those changes.

Helix however, is a clusterfuck of epic proportions in every conceivable way, which makes for great hatewatching because no part of me is wondering how to fix this, it is blatantly unfixable.

Sodomy Hussein
Oct 9, 2005

Everything is subject to the needs of intelligence, for geniuses like me. If we actually solve problems, people won't need me and people like me, and this is a travesty without end. You have to squeeze the poor so they know their place, and you fucking commies forget that.


It's really hard to nail down any one bad thing about The Strain because virtually everything is bad.

Bad characters. Eph is a whining idiot moron with a bad wig and it's by extension impossible to care about anything he does. Every time the show breaks from the actual draw, Guillermo Del Toro zombie-vampires, it's to visit tertiary family characters that we're supposed to care about but that we actually can't wait to see die. And the show doesn't get this at all, it thinks this is all heavy poo poo.

Scattershot tone. The apocalypse is happening, but wait we have to stop for this CBS custody drama. Let's break to see how hard it is to deal with a parent who has dementia. Now for a break from chaos in the streets to have a bunch of people who showed up two episodes ago talk about their personal problems. A bunch of pulpy, by-god maybe actually entertaining characters show up to break up this very special episode of Chicago Hope, and then start splitting screen-time on pointless filler. Occasionally plot threads start between main characters and tertiary characters, only to be cut short in the third scene when the character in question turns into a vampire.

Miserable pacing. Series finally looks to be getting going on episodes seven and eight... Followed by a whole lot of anticlimactic nonsense that would have been settled many episodes before, were it not for the show's insistence on having this inane, awful custody subplot. Let's do "in-depth life cycle of the newly-born vampire" in like five different episodes in case you weren't paying attention or something. There's charitably eight episodes worth of actual things happening in this thirteen-episode season.

Plot holes an aircraft carrier could go through. Nothing about the overall story or the finer plot points make any sense whatsoever if you stop to think about them for even a moment. Every character acts like a total moron just to drag out episodes with more filler.

The Master. The Master looks ridiculous and he sounds like he has a dick in his mouth. Which he kinda does, but still.

The world's most boring apocalypse. By the mid-point of the season, humans cannot walk out on the streets of New York City at night, but everyone's in the basement talking about their feelings and motivations. There's an eclipse where vampires completely rule the streets, and then.... Ehhhhhh, let's argue about whether or not the plague is mystical or biological with Eph the Moron, self-appointed sleuth sent to puzzle out the world's simplest mystery.

Dull design. The cinematography is uninspired, the set dressings are usually dull, and it's completely obvious they don't have the money to film in New York City. The monsters aren't treated with any respect by the script, sometimes they're deadly scorpions and sometimes they're clumsy zombies. Setrakian realizing he has to take his heart meds and then just walking back up the stairs out of the vampire den was probably the worst of this. Generally, as physical choreography goes, this show is doing nothing.

I recently started picking up Walking Dead again now that most of it is on Netflix, and while Walking Dead is a sadpocalypse filled with endlessly moping characters that make it fairly difficult to watch and nearly impossible to marathon, it's just so much better written and shot, and they have so much stronger an idea of what they're doing and where they want to go with it. I'm not sure I've watched a show as atonal as The Strain before.

Sodomy Hussein fucked around with this message at 09:23 on Oct 7, 2014

Barack HUSSEIN
Mar 20, 2003

Screams from the haters, got a nice ring to it

I guess every superhero need his theme music


This show is a goddamn mess.

Mr.48
May 1, 2007


What a loving letdown, I kept hoping against hope that the final episode would improve things and get me excited for season 2 but no dice. Guess I'm done with this show.

Dudebro
Jan 1, 2010
I TO UNDERAGE GYMNASTS


I was most confused by the part where the characters wondered what it takes to kill the master when Eph and Satrakian could have immediately cut him up with their silver blades when he was writhing in the sunlight.

Otherwise, I'm not as critical as you guys. For some reason I enjoy the show for all its flaws.

Dudebro fucked around with this message at 20:43 on Oct 7, 2014

GreenNight
Feb 19, 2006
Turning the light on the darkest places, you and I know we got to face this now. We got to face this now.

Seriously, I'm sure a chainsaw to the head will kill him just fine.

Drifter
Oct 22, 2000

Belated Bear Witness


Soiled Meat

Dudebro posted:

I was most confused by the part where the characters wondered what it takes to kill the master when Eph and Satrakian could have cut have immediately cut him up with their silver blades when he was writhing in the sunlight.

Otherwise, I'm not as critical as you guys. For some reason I enjoy the show for all its flaws.

You should watch Sleepy Hollow if you're not already, if you want a batshit crazy but awesome show.

Red Mundus
Oct 22, 2010


I am a huge baby fan-boy for all things supernatural, Del Toro stuff, and vampires and even I can't bother to care anymore. I'm even a huge fan of the books for the aforementioned reasons but the show is such a failure on several levels that I just can't cut it anymore.

Even the vampire designs are just too monster-house level goofy and pull me out.

withak
Jan 15, 2003


Fun Shoe

The CDC doctors, the hacker, and the exterminator are all expert shots with handguns, and experts at killing with swords. But only until an important vampire comes in. Then they suddenly become below average. This doesn't make much sense.

Also, why did the guy doctor and the old guy stand there with their lethal silver swords and gawk at the master for 15 seconds while he writhed in the sun, thus allowing him time to recover and escape?

Annointed
Mar 2, 2013



Because the plot says so. The trite, poorly paced plot.

SHOAH NUFF
Nov 14, 2005

Blood Clots
Sweat Dries
Bones Heal
Suck it Up and Keep Wrestling


withak posted:

The CDC doctors, the hacker, and the exterminator are all expert shots with handguns, and experts at killing with swords. But only until an important vampire comes in. Then they suddenly become below average. This doesn't make much sense.

Also, why did the guy doctor and the old guy stand there with their lethal silver swords and gawk at the master for 15 seconds while he writhed in the sun, thus allowing him time to recover and escape?

The Strain is really, really bad but these kinda complaints can be made of any action movie or show

Finndo
Dec 27, 2005

Title Text goes here.


Before reading this thread I thought I was enjoying this show as a guilty pleasure, but now I realize I was wrong.

I am curious to see how the second season turns out. Since it did okay ratings-wise, maybe it will get better funding and just... better. We shall see!

Gonz
Dec 22, 2009

"Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"


withak posted:

Also, why did the guy doctor and the old guy stand there with their lethal silver swords and gawk at the master for 15 seconds while he writhed in the sun, thus allowing him time to recover and escape?

The exact same reason that James Bond doesn't immediately shoot Dr. No or Goldfinger or Blofeld in their heads the instant he sees them: Exposition > Logic.

Also, there'd be an awful lot of 30 minute James Bond movies out there if he did.

...of SCIENCE!
Apr 26, 2008



This show is brutal. It ropes you in with a good pilot, goes downhill enough to make me consider quit watching it, does that rad gas station episode which is just good enough to rope me back in, and then resumes going downhill until the wet fart of a finale.

The worst kind of show is the one that shows that it could be so much better yet never is

banned from Starbucks
Jul 18, 2004






Time to reveal the other vampire masters what should the set look like? Just prop them up on some hand trucks in a big empty room I guess.

Psyker
Jun 21, 2004

[Binge and] Purge the xenos!


withak posted:

The CDC doctors, the hacker, and the exterminator are all expert shots with handguns, and experts at killing with swords. But only until an important vampire comes in. Then they suddenly become below average. This doesn't make much sense.

Also, why did the guy doctor and the old guy stand there with their lethal silver swords and gawk at the master for 15 seconds while he writhed in the sun, thus allowing him time to recover and escape?

Because they thought they had already won. It was a smug, "we won vampire in sunlight" moment that was shattered when the Master goes "well this was cute, time to run down the side of the building."

Because you just don't kill the Master. Not like that.

Alien Sex Manual
Dec 14, 2010

is not a sandwich



zVxTeflon posted:

Time to reveal the other vampire masters what should the set look like? Just prop them up on some hand trucks in a big empty room I guess.

That part cracked me up. Hand trucks are for moving furniture and boxes, not ancient vampires, drat it. At least the makeup on the Ancients looked better than it does on the Master?

The vampires walking backwards in a trance scene was legitimately creepy. That's about all I can say that was positive about this episode.

Phenotype
Jul 24, 2007

You must defeat Sheng Long to stand a chance.



So should I even bother watching the rest of this season? The last one I saw was the one where boring ex wife gets infected by killing her boyfriend. I have had the rest of the episodes staring at me from my DVR for weeks now, and every time I think of watching one, I end up deciding I'd have more fun watching some other show 's reruns or YouTube videos. From the looks of this thread, it doesn't look like the finale stirred up any of the hype I wanted to hear.

...of SCIENCE!
Apr 26, 2008



zVxTeflon posted:

Time to reveal the other vampire masters what should the set look like? Just prop them up on some hand trucks in a big empty room I guess.

It's especially disappointing because the way they describe the vampire masters in the book was pretty cool and unique: they're perfectly smooth and hairless because they've spent aeons sitting unmoving while their vampire regeneration is raging and they're so in control of their bodies they never make a single movement that isn't calculated and perfectly controlled.

Then in the TV show they just make them low-budget knockoffs of that one monster from Pan's Labyrinth and slap them on hand truck and call it a day.

PriorMarcus
Oct 16, 2008

ASK ME ABOUT BEING ALLERGIC TO POSITIVITY


Does anyone have a screencaps of the Ancients? I can't be bothered watching the episode to see them.

Mr.48
May 1, 2007


etalian posted:

The vampire premise is somewhat eclectic too since they seem familiar to Stroker vampire such as having the special coffin/soil from the home land but the actual biology is due to scientific reasons not supernatural ones.

Its still very much supernatural though. What with the psychic powers, funky mirror reflections and all the rest of the silly stuff.

Alien Sex Manual
Dec 14, 2010

is not a sandwich



PriorMarcus posted:

Does anyone have a screencaps of the Ancients? I can't be bothered watching the episode to see them.

GIS fails me, but here's the picture Doug Jones posted on Facebook of himself in makeup. (They take the nose off with CGI, hence the green makeup.)

Only registered members can see post attachments!

Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009





Glaucus atlanticus posted:

GIS fails me, but here's the picture Doug Jones posted on Facebook of himself in makeup. (They take the nose off with CGI, hence the green makeup.)


Of loving course it's Doug Jones.

Psyker
Jun 21, 2004

[Binge and] Purge the xenos!


Why do they have ears? IIRC, didn't the book establish that the vampire transformation consisted of1), losing you hair, 2), losing your ears, and 3), losing your genitalia?

PriorMarcus
Oct 16, 2008

ASK ME ABOUT BEING ALLERGIC TO POSITIVITY


Glaucus atlanticus posted:

GIS fails me, but here's the picture Doug Jones posted on Facebook of himself in makeup. (They take the nose off with CGI, hence the green makeup.)



Oh. That's real bad looking.

Drifter
Oct 22, 2000

Belated Bear Witness


Soiled Meat



twit666
Nov 16, 2006



Soiled Meat


Wow! That's a heavy flow day!

tatopom
Apr 9, 2009


Really? This is how they end the season? Where's the payoff?

Rich dude gets zombified but turns out he doesn't

Butler dude quits without consequences other than ' you'll regret this '

A showdown with the boss where no-one gets killed or even hurt. There wasn't even any badass banter! Setrakian -'Now its time for me to see him'. Master - 'yes now you see me'.

Was their plan after losing the UV bomb to just kill him with sunlight (or did I miss their plan b). Team Setrakian gets headshots but the Hacker lady shoots Ze German in the shoulder twice and forgets she has more bullets.

Vampire mom finally meets the family and nothing much happens except some shouting and crying (I hoped the son getting a sweet silver sword was meant to be a setup for this but nope). Isn't a main character supposed to be turned at this point?

And the final reveal of a mysterious third faction to Gus goes "yup no kidding its a terf war, so". And why they picked him 'yo why you telling me this' with an equally useless response. And the reveal of 'powerful ancients' all 3 of whom look alike and the same as the master, and aren't doing anything more interesting than taking a nap. (if they had fancy costume design I couldn't see poo poo of it with the lighting in that scene).

Did anyone see any plot resolutions or setups for the series?

achillesforever6
Apr 23, 2012

psst you wanna do a communism?


Psyker posted:

Because they thought they had already won. It was a smug, "we won vampire in sunlight" moment that was shattered when the Master goes "well this was cute, time to run down the side of the building."

Because you just don't kill the Master. Not like that.
Yeah the way you kill the Master is talking him down and convincing him to kill himself.

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Josh Lyman
May 24, 2009





This show is aggressively stupid and can go gently caress itself. I'm out.

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