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ReptileChillock
Jan 7, 2014

by Lowtax
The only time I feel like dating is when I'm liquored. I met this amazing French girl last year after drinking for a few days, but then I hung out with her sober a few times and it sucked because I'm a huge misanthrope.

Edit/fake edit: what I'm saying is don't bother leaving the house b/c it's way overrated

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SHISHKABOB
Nov 30, 2012

Fun Shoe
I think you should kill yourself too

Rad Tad
Jul 2, 2014

SHISHKABOB posted:

I'm not normal

I'm gonna go kill myself now

Asphyxiation via helium is painless right

drat your deathcries are gonna sound hilarious though

SHISHKABOB
Nov 30, 2012

Fun Shoe
Somebody getting interrupted while trying to kill themselves with helium asphyxiation would indeed make for a pretty funny bit

Rad Tad
Jul 2, 2014

you gotta say something like "oompa loompa doompa dee dee, mom close the door so I can set my soul free"

Cyber Dog
Feb 22, 2008

sex is a terrible and disgusting lie and i for one have never recovered even after smashing my weiner with a hammer

SHISHKABOB
Nov 30, 2012

Fun Shoe

In Drywall posted:

sex is a terrible and disgusting lie and i for one have never recovered even after smashing my weiner with a hammer

Actually sex is pretty great

Kimmalah
Nov 14, 2005

Basically just a baby in a trenchcoat.


In Drywall posted:

sex is a terrible and disgusting lie and i for one have never recovered even after smashing my weiner with a hammer

More sex for the rest of us then!

Cyber Dog
Feb 22, 2008

SHISHKABOB posted:

Actually sex is pretty great

wow u r very deluded

Cyber Dog
Feb 22, 2008

Kimmalah posted:

More sex for the rest of us then!

good luck you disgusting ape

SHISHKABOB
Nov 30, 2012

Fun Shoe
I am wearing this tshirt tonight

SHISHKABOB
Nov 30, 2012

Fun Shoe
Also my lucky red underwear

Cyber Dog
Feb 22, 2008

is it a pajama party????

Cyber Dog
Feb 22, 2008

best of luck on yr date remember the great words of the genie (in bee form) "just beeeeeeee yourself"

ReptileChillock
Jan 7, 2014

by Lowtax
Masturbate -right- before the date. She'll pick up the pheremones and will for sure make out w/you.

Kimmalah
Nov 14, 2005

Basically just a baby in a trenchcoat.


In Drywall posted:

good luck you disgusting ape

Why thank you :tipshat:

www
Aug 4, 2010

going to breakfast is something 'friends' do.

sorry bro

SHISHKABOB
Nov 30, 2012

Fun Shoe

www posted:

going to breakfast is something 'friends' do.

sorry bro

Read the thread dumbass it's dinner

King of Internet
Nov 16, 2013

High King Internet of Internet

SHISHKABOB posted:

Read the thread dumbass it's dinner

Cool I did that too

Didn't get anything out of it lol suckaaaaa

cis white male
Jul 5, 2014

i'm a fag i'm a lesbian
I have a date tomorrow i'm going to social security to replace my card, also what is a date exactly

les fleurs du mall
Jun 30, 2014

by LadyAmbien

cis white male posted:

I have a date tomorrow i'm going to social security to replace my card, also what is a date exactly

don't forget to neg hard

Vhak lord of hate
Jun 6, 2008

I AM DRINK THE BLOOD OF JESUS
my gf of almost 3 years and i broke up two days ago good luck with your date it will all end in misery

SHISHKABOB
Nov 30, 2012

Fun Shoe

Vhak lord of hate posted:

my gf of almost 3 years and i broke up two days ago good luck with your date it will all end in misery

We all end up dead why not make out a lil b4 then

Giraffe
Dec 12, 2005

Soiled Meat

Vhak lord of hate posted:

my gf of almost 3 years and i broke up two days ago good luck with your date it will all end in misery

Don't worry, she's probably already getting plowed by another dude.

SHISHKABOB
Nov 30, 2012

Fun Shoe
Btw I love your avatar so I am sad for you

Chuck Tanner
Nov 10, 2012

by Lowtax

SHISHKABOB posted:

We all end up dead why not make out a lil b4 then

i like your atitude op


ur alright

les fleurs du mall
Jun 30, 2014

by LadyAmbien

SHISHKABOB posted:

We all end up dead why not make out a lil b4 then

Pretty sure that's what MJ said to the Home Alone kid

SHISHKABOB
Nov 30, 2012

Fun Shoe

Quickscope420dad posted:

Pretty sure that's what MJ said to the Home Alone kid

with the corollary of "w/people u wanna make out with"

SHISHKABOB
Nov 30, 2012

Fun Shoe
I'm on date number two guys hell yes

les fleurs du mall
Jun 30, 2014

by LadyAmbien

SHISHKABOB posted:

I'm on date number two guys hell yes

Make sure that during your second date you constantly think about how many dudes she's not evening dating that she's slept with since the last time you saw her

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vyst
Aug 25, 2009



SHISHKABOB posted:

I'm on date number two guys hell yes

Yes, maybe you'll get a sweet rear end out hug this time.

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