- GEExCEE
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E/N thread: girlfriend wants me to return gaza strip and west bank to palestine
hi all i am leader of israel and having relationship problems. first couple of years as israel president were great. "shimon peres you are so good shimon peres you are so much better than whats-his-face coma boy" was all i would hear constantly. now i have been with girlfriend for three months and things are getting VERY serious VERY quickly. she is a great girl and we have a lot of common interests and the sex is amazing. problem is about two weeks ago she started dropping all these hints that have gotten increasingly more obvious. it all came to a head when i was like what should we do tonight and she was like well we could go to the movies, go to the beach, ggive west bank and gaza strip back to palestine, whatever you want to do. i was like whoa whoa whoa i just sent 48000 troops and 18000 reservists there and she had the nerve to say that was a big turn off of me to do. i was like hamas lobbed 1500 missiles at us wtf am i supposed to do?? she muttered "be a bigger man" under her breath and i just went off. not sure what to do from here. i cant remember what i said but it was really bad. not sure if i can repair the damage done. should i give west bank and gaza strip back to palestine to please girlfriend? would it even make a difference at this point
you gotta stick to your guns. first, kinap your beloved and escape to your forever bunker. Nuke the entire levant, killing everyone, but, then in a surprise twist, say yo're gonna give it all to palestine. it's the most romantic thing to do, and if this doesnt work, well, shes pretty much stuck with you anyways and you can just do whatever. make sure to have some wine and a nice dinner and some condoms in the bunke rin case things are going good but also maybe like some earplugs if things go sour. maybe some tape so you can divide the bunker in half, and make sure she stays on her side. You could also consider some games like connect four or uno.
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Jul 21, 2014 14:10
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Apr 25, 2024 21:14
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- Lord Frankenstyle
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Mmmm,
You smell like Lysol Wipes.
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Also something something about feeling entitled to a land they lost 8000 years ago
Oh. Well poo poo, if there's no time limit I call dibs on Africa since we all came from there. Surely they won't object to a white man who wants to get in touch with his roots.
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Jul 21, 2014 21:48
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Jul 21, 2014 14:10
