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Torrannor
Apr 27, 2013

---FAGNER---
TEAM-MATE
:siren: UPDATE IN THE PREVIOUS POST! :siren:

Is that a Golddale Duck II?

While teleportation is not meta-teleportation, it's still nice. Though I suppose you have to clear the fog of war first to teleport units over the sea? Luckily, we have a flying undead ship!

These numbers in the upper left corner make it impossible to tell how much money you have. I hope you are not too far away from accumulating the gold to pay that stupid witch. I know I suffer from Paradox induced pretty-borders-syndrome, but your LP is giving me pretty-landscape-syndrome as well.

That was a nice overview over the Svart economy. I take it Planestriders are better at generating mana than our Svarts?

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Bloodly
Nov 3, 2008

Not as strong as you'd expect.

quote:

I heard one shouting something about going to beat up leaving dog headed warriors with scythes for hands and crocodiles that shoot beams of light from their heads”

Ah, Age of Mythology...

Veloxyll
May 3, 2011

Fuck you say?!

Torrannor posted:

:siren: UPDATE IN THE PREVIOUS POST! :siren:

Is that a Golddale Duck II?

While teleportation is not meta-teleportation, it's still nice. Though I suppose you have to clear the fog of war first to teleport units over the sea? Luckily, we have a flying undead ship!

These numbers in the upper left corner make it impossible to tell how much money you have. I hope you are not too far away from accumulating the gold to pay that stupid witch. I know I suffer from Paradox induced pretty-borders-syndrome, but your LP is giving me pretty-landscape-syndrome as well.

That was a nice overview over the Svart economy. I take it Planestriders are better at generating mana than our Svarts?

The worst part is the stupid witch nags you every two turns or so. Even when you have nowhere near 1000 gold...

kvx687
Dec 29, 2009

Soiled Meat
8 cities on a five city limit? That's, what, six unrest and 50 gold per turn in upkeep? Might want to switch to the other branch and pick up a few government upgrades.

Torrannor posted:

These numbers in the upper left corner make it impossible to tell how much money you have. I hope you are not too far away from accumulating the gold to pay that stupid witch. I know I suffer from Paradox induced pretty-borders-syndrome, but your LP is giving me pretty-landscape-syndrome as well.

That was a nice overview over the Svart economy. I take it Planestriders are better at generating mana than our Svarts?

The numbers only block the currency symbol. The first number is the current gold reserves, the one in parentheses is gold per turn. At the current rate, he's about 12 turns or so away, assuming he doesn't spend anything or loot any monster lairs.

I don't know how good Planestriders are at mana, but the Svarts aren't great at it; each city can only build one mana trap, and the only repeatable mana building only gives +2 and is at the end of the magic tech tree.

JcDent
May 13, 2013

Give me a rifle, one round, and point me at Berlin!

Torrannor posted:


Is that a Golddale Duck II?


It's an undead ship, so it might be Golddale Duck I

The worst thing about terrain splotches is that Fertile Ground comes in 7 hex batches, but other useful terrain (well, Icy) comes in one hex. Kind of hard to do landscaping.

And I hate Krell for loving up my mountains.

AND ANOTHER THING: while the game doesn't tell you that, at least as far as I have noticed it, but river fording is great old movement point eating bitch. That's why I'm making the new road.


Bloodly posted:

Ah, Age of Mythology...

Anubites are the best unit ever, even if not entirely useful or powerful (unlike tree eating bronze giants or rebuilding automatons)

kvx687 posted:

8 cities on a five city limit? That's, what, six unrest and 50 gold per turn in upkeep? Might want to switch to the other branch and pick up a few government upgrades.

I wanted to show unrest mechanics, as I've never gotten them Huh, didn't know they tax your for it. Well, bummer.

Tehan
Jan 19, 2011

JcDent posted:

“I am also extremely afraid of shadowbolts launched by undead mages who have risen from the grave multiple times”

This is the sort of financial regulation that makes an empire great.

Neruz
Jul 23, 2012

A paragon of manliness
The idea of half-drunk Svarts 'farming' the plants in Lands of Life which are characterised by massive and highly mobile vines crawling across the landscape continues to amuse me.

EzEight
Jan 21, 2014
I'm really digging the whole introducing new building tour guide style, keeps everything fresh.

Psykmoe
Oct 28, 2008
It's very charming to see King Lich care about his subjects and the Svarts finding their drive and industry again. I enjoy your writing.

aerion111
Nov 29, 2011

Prodigy of Curiosity.
Master of Jacks.
Apprentice of Masks.
And, when fighting the forces of darkness, always remember: "Armor of Darkness, Weapon of Light"

Neruz posted:

The idea of half-drunk Svarts 'farming' the plants in Lands of Life which are characterised by massive and highly mobile vines crawling across the landscape continues to amuse me.

I actually hadn't realized until this LP that the Lands of Life give 5-hp-a-turn healing to the living.
I was still using it heavily, since choosing a far-too-low difficulty setting let me research every single thing and cast magic without much tactical thought, and I did notice the +50% food (I tried a harder setting, but mistook bad luck for incompetence, so I turned down the difficulty again (and then got lucky))

I do feel like the Svarts are the only ones where I feel comfortably using primarily their units.
With the undead, my army had a tendency to be almost exclusively summoned Wolves - mind you, it's still good to have a 'Summon Army' spell of some sort, even if it's Meta-Teleporting your primary damage-dealing Hero around.
With anything else, I usually only use them until I get the Undead, so that I can get enough mana to afford to Summon Wolves haphazardly.
Heck, they even survive, as long as you avoid anything too Elemental and/or flying (unlike freaking Wizards. Wizards break the game if you get them on your first or second Portal, but aren't so great later on.)

Another thing it took me ages to notice (but which was entirely my fault since the game gives a convenient building-tree) was that the money-boosting building-line for some reason has one of the buildings at the bottom of the list.

If I was to have one proper complaint about the Svarts, it'd be that it's annoying to have healer-units that can't heal themselves.

Veloxyll
May 3, 2011

Fuck you say?!

In #1 I used mainly Dwarves and Elves. Because upgraded both are absurd.

Also probably a few dragons for air support.

kvx687
Dec 29, 2009

Soiled Meat

JcDent posted:

The worst thing about terrain splotches is that Fertile Ground comes in 7 hex batches, but other useful terrain (well, Icy) comes in one hex. Kind of hard to do landscaping.

And I hate Krell for loving up my mountains.

AND ANOTHER THING: while the game doesn't tell you that, at least as far as I have noticed it, but river fording is great old movement point eating bitch. That's why I'm making the new road.
Dauros has a spell that creates a seven-tile ring of ice, though it takes two turns to cast and a lot of piety. There's also a seven-tile desert spell, and I think it's a regular spell and not Helian. For the mountains, can't you just Raise Land them back up? I only ever used the spell to remove seas, but it should work. And yes, rivers suck, it's like three movement points to cross one.

JcDent posted:

Huh, didn't know they tax your for it. Well, bummer.

Yup. AFAIK, it's five gold for the first, 20 for two, and 50 for three. If you hover the mouse over the unrest bar, it should tell you exactly what it's costing you.

Psykmoe
Oct 28, 2008

Veloxyll posted:

In #1 I used mainly Dwarves and Elves. Because upgraded both are absurd.

Also probably a few dragons for air support.

I remember using Werewolves a lot, but switching to Paladins of Life if I found holy ground. since the first game gave you no limits on how many unit upgrades you could get out of special resources, you could, with enough cash, turn paladins of life monstrously hard to kill, and every second turn they could self-heal. They made really good meatshields for caster heroes or squads of ranged attackers, although it was expensive :v:

Glazius
Jul 22, 2007

Hail all those who are able,
any mouse can,
any mouse will,
but the Guard prevail.

Clapping Larry
I look forward to King Lich tackling the arcane discipline of economics.

Deceitful Penguin
Feb 16, 2011
Can't ya just toss down a dickload of Libertopias and reap the cash from them?

Also jesus when are you getting that horrible sum, you get what, around 30 cash a turn? Jesus.

wiegieman
Apr 22, 2010

Royalty is a continuous cutting motion


Deceitful Penguin posted:

Can't ya just toss down a dickload of Libertopias and reap the cash from them?

Also jesus when are you getting that horrible sum, you get what, around 30 cash a turn? Jesus.

You need to grow the city to a certain size (5?) I believe.

Mzbundifund
Nov 5, 2011

I'm afraid so.
No, you can turn a city into a free city on the first turn you build it, or 10 turns after you capture it, but free cities grow slower than normal ones and each free city only provides 2+population gold per turn. Free gold, yes, but not strong. What would help more is trying to raise his city limit, or turning some of his low producers into free cities just to get them out of his bureaucratic overload. Free cities can never compete with cities like Silver Silks, which have the potential to be just a disgustingly strong economic powerhouse. Each of those spider hatches can produce 10 gold per turn, and the silver mine an additional 6. Once you start multiplying that with banks and harbors, it's bonkers. Until we can find some more quality gold city spots, the fastest short-term way to earn money in this game is the pillage economy, and now that he has teleportation it's easier than ever to foolishly overextend shoot heroes and elite troops forward to burn monster lairs and cash in.

JcDent
May 13, 2013

Give me a rifle, one round, and point me at Berlin!
Chapter 11: The Strange Times Of Peace



Finally, the good-ish people of Baytown could breathe a sigh of relief. No more would they sheep wander into the hills to return as half burnt horribly mutated monstrosities. No longer would a wandering cow die while birthing beast headed monstrosities.

Magic hills were, once again, hills.

However, the lush grasses and getle bushes led to many more teenage trysts, so the benefits were debatable.



“Green Turtles are a newly hatched (50 to 100 years ago) species of Giant Turtle. Due to their young age, Green Turtles are a little smaller in size and have softer teeth and shell. Moreover, their breath is still not as strong as the breath that can prevent you from studying the more mature species up close“

“Hold fast, men! A slightly smaller giant turtle approaches!”



Due to the multitudes of creatures infesting the waters and shores of Long Shores, it was decided that building a fleet was currently unfeasible. Fortunately, mages had all sorts of strange solutions to mundane problems.

Such as making a donkey riding knight fly.



“Not even the most horrible critter of the sky is safe from my lance now! Chaaarge!



TASTE STEEL AND FURY!



“I wonder where did they get that gold… It doesn’t matter, I guess. Come, noble steed, there are more sky-borne villains to kill!”



“Billiam? Not even William or Will? I don’t think I want someone like that in our employ. If you’re a hero worthy of a legendary name, you can probably a more graceful one. Now leave me to my research”

“I’ll just tell him that the realm can’t support another hero”

“That wouldn’t be a lie, either. Where does the money go… I swear, once I’m done, I’ll find the culprit and flay him”



“My lord accepts your offers, however, he can’t attend himself. Business of the realm, you understand”

“Matters of the realm… yes, of course… you have to take care… of the… realm… yes”



“Turtle soup is back on menu, boys”

“Yay...”





“I don’t like those soldiers milling about. They should stay away from our lands”

“Yet somehow there’s no way to deal with them.”

“Lich should have crushed him. *tpfu* For someone who’s mostly bone, he should have more spine!”

“You forget yourself. That’s almost treason talk. Step lightly, Veremoud. I don’t want you to end up like those fools from Serne Vary”



“This new road is really comfortable, it let me get back home and visit my family. I haven’t seen them in months”

“Unfortunately, I remember why I had gone to military”

“I saw Snorri’s mum”



There were issues larger than seeing Snorri’s mother (but nobody is saying that was a small issue). Like lake Deadlin disappearing, to be replaced by a dry desert wasteland. Row upon row of quality metal boat rusted, stuck in sand banks, unable to move. Where travelers milled about dodging undead seagulls, only decaying docks stood. Whores no longer plied their trade in the wharf, leaving behind well polished boardwalk and scents of suspicious origin.

It was a disaster both for the people of Serne Vary, and collectors of ancient knick-knacks everywhere.



“Fist sky monsters, then – sea monsters! Nothing can escape the grasp of the Flying Knight!”



“Die, you blood suckers, die!”

“Wait… the spell… It’s waning! M’lord, I beseech thee! Grant me flight once more, so I could deal with these pests swiftly!”



“DO YOU SEE THIS, my liege! I triumph again”

Even if my heart is troubled over Vampirium…



“Well, then, my noble stallion companion, we will proceed on foot. I think the attentions of our king are more needed elsewhere”

“Now then, we must prepare for the jungles, hills and mountains ahead”

“Magic Potion Of Smell Most Foul That Killeth Bugs, Beetles And All Sorts of Other Crawlers – check”

“Donkey climbing gear – check”

“Maps of dubious quality – check…”



“Now listen there, lass, I won’t have puss dripping out of my arse for three months because you mages got yerself killed. Here’s some wisdom that they don’t teach you at whatever mage school you go. The best way to avoid getting shot or stabbed…”

“...is good magical shield?”

“Nay! It’s avoiding getting stabbed or shot in the tha first place. Here, let me show you something…”



AAAAAAAAARGH!



AYEEEEEEE



“That’s it! GET EVERY LAST BIT OF GOLD! Search every last nook and cranny! Turn over beds, graves and tables! Melt down marriage gifts and dowries! Get money lenders to give what they got – or slay them on the spot for treason! We will find money for that witch!



“GET THE LEVIATHAN!”

And find an assassin to kill that deceiving, money grabbing witch. A cheap assassin, we can barely afford hired thugs



“I wish they had given me flight for more than just to report that I saw a giant turtle heading for the port. Giant turtles are the only thing heading for that port anyway”.



“Create artefact… a lot of good that does… It’s not create life, not by any measure, and that would be useful…”



“If this is a ghost ship, what do they weight their shots with?”

“Guilt?”





"Some say that these tree spirits have existed in Ardania long before the men. Others believe that demonwoods are the creation of Andrevus the Dark Mage. But the one point upon which all are agreed: demonwoods, no matter their history, harbor ferocious hatred towards all other creatures."
- From "The Overall Description of Everything" by Master Alfus Bumblegate


Sir Hugue Dry Branch was caught between a bear and a hard place. A moving hard place, since demonwood roamed about, like a malevolent tumbleweed, killing and causing destruction wherever it went.

Fortunately, Sir Hugue was a very experienced knight armed with enchanted gear and a Great Mage for a patron – and great wish to add some demonic dry branches to his shield.



“A barony will be granted to a righteous servant of the lord… concerning the type of barony, it might be made up of honours and, or manors… manors, thus comprising of following types of land:

“Demesne, the part directly controlled by the lord and used for the benefit of his household and dependents, whatever they might be…”

“Dependent holdings carrying the obligation that the peasant household supply the lord with specified labour services or a part of its output - or gold in lieu thereof - subject to the custom attached to the holding, as well agreeing to summons to levy in case of invaders from worlds unlike our own…”

That seems specific…

“Free peasant land, without such obligation but otherwise subject to manorial jurisdiction and custom, and owing gold rent fixed at the time of the lease…”

“Sound a little arcane, but it might be useful. Some of the Svarts aren’t as loyal as the others… Comes with having subjects that can think for themselves, I suppose…”

“Though they could improve cataloguing on this library… Interesting it might be, this is not what I was looking for”



A rare kind of person laments when luscious grass springs up in dry wasteland and when fertile chernozem replaces lands that oozed death.

Hopefully, that person is a Svart overseer of a mana extractor that used to convert all those death vapors to mana and not a morbid youth or a necromancer.

Morbid and moping youth were a great danger in lands where necromancers could be found, and necromancers were a threat anywhere.





“Well, this is a pleasant change of pace. I actually like seeing landscape that’s not just a patchwork of unrelated lands”

“Speak for yourself. I was hunting down a lizardman. Wrote a book about a lizard serving wench who was not in control of her passions, dallied with her master, she did. Attrocious piece of writing, that, have to kill him.



“So, you see, this is a very equal proposal. Could you please inform your master?”

Equal it may be, but it’s nonsensical in extreme

“I’m sure his majesty, King Lich VI, will be happy to agree”





"Rune magic of the Svarts is based on the deep knowledge of the essence of minerals and elements. As far as I understand it, certain combinations of elements, applied on metal or stone bases in a special way, create 'force currents' with incredibly powerful vibrations. It turns out, Svart women can feel these vibrations and manage them. That's why all Svart girls sit a special test. Those who show particular talent in managing the power of runes become apprentices of Rune Witches, and others become Rune Warriors."
(from "Chronicles of New Worlds" written by Master Vardies Teleran)


“Not much practice to be hand since the lands of death are kind of gone. It is agreed that we need to some on hand burning experience”

“With all the money spent on the schools and academies, you are more than welcome to join the ranks of the military”



“Thank you. We do expect to have the finest mageweave armor. After all, we have to shelter from the elements, and the rune halls didn’t prepare us for that like military training would”



“And I don’t think you can afford to lose such kind of university trained magical talent”

“What can we afford these days, with taxes wasted on burghers and mayors and other incompetents and corrupt managers, and plunder being the main influx of money…”



“Don’t think us vain, Rurik. These silk robes might look fine, but the glitter is more magical than material. Magic requires the finest of materials, much like any crafting. A Svart knows that better than anyone”

“And shamans don’t know anything, foul dirty beasts”



“And finally, protection potions. I heard Long Shores are far away from being a pleasure shard”





And so they marched off to conquest, leaving behind them the University of Gatehouse, with its institutes of Runes, Higher Casting, Lower Casting, Caligraphy and Fine Smithy, Svarticulture, it’s halls that stretched for kilometers and wide, well lit auditoriums, vivariums, dissection rooms, hissing and gnashing filled armored basements, observatories that mapped the alien skies, cavernous sprocket libraries, small parks, inns…



And, of course, a magic bazaar that sold alcohol as often as it sold magic. No drinking was allowed on premises since drunk Svarts and a floating bazaar was a dangerous combination indeed.





“Hey, a forest! Haven’t seen those in a while”

“How about the ones in Long Shores?”

“I refuse to step through any Gate that leads me to a world filled with angry floating gas bags, carnivorous turtles of unusual size and killer mosquitoes”



King Lich VI fell to the ground clutching his skull in his hands. Parchment and books scattered all around.

“Argh, my head!”



“The Grum-gog is happening…”



“I swear it was less painful last time. Must be all the studying. I need some rest, but not now. I am so, so close…”

He started collecting the books that now lied on the floor.

SageNytell
Sep 28, 2008

<REDACT> THIS!
A good chunk of the OP is currently a busted link leading to the newest update, and you've got a few broken BBcode tags in there. Might want to check that out!

Drakenel
Dec 2, 2008

The glow is a guide, my friend. Though it falls to you to avert catastrophe, you will never fight alone.

JcDent posted:

“Speak for yourself. I was hunting down a lizardman. Wrote a book about a lizard serving wench who was not in control of her passions, dallied with her master, she did. Attrocious piece of writing, that, have to kill him.

Nice elder scrolls reference.

I imagine being reminded what pain feels like is not a fun experience for King Lich.

Glazius
Jul 22, 2007

Hail all those who are able,
any mouse can,
any mouse will,
but the Guard prevail.

Clapping Larry
Man, I hope you get that new spell soon.

It's probably going to cost 2000 mana or some bullshit amount, isn't it?

PotatoManJack
Nov 9, 2009
What the heck was that big fiery explosion that happened about halfway through the update?

Veloxyll
May 3, 2011

Fuck you say?!

PotatoManJack posted:

What the heck was that big fiery explosion that happened about halfway through the update?

Volcanos.

Yes, plural.

Some of Mr Ephemeral's terraforming spells are a bit more dramatic than others.

Neruz
Jul 23, 2012

A paragon of manliness
Yeah while you can ignore Elpiritster for awhile if you ignore him for too long he starts making volcanos happen everywhere.

kvx687
Dec 29, 2009

Soiled Meat

Veloxyll posted:

Volcanos.

Yes, plural.

Some of Mr Ephemeral's terraforming spells are a bit more dramatic than others.

Yeah, Elpirister's the nastiest of the three. Tendral is pretty pathetic unless you somehow don't have fireball, and Empress' mirrors don't spawn enough enemies to be a serious threat. Hostile terraforming is a hell of a lot more problematic; most of it isn't so bad, but he'll randomly contaminate your land, summon volcanoes, or sink half your buildings into he sea. He also hits a massive area across multiple shards every time he strikes, too.

Tehan
Jan 19, 2011

kvx687 posted:

or sink half your buildings into he sea

I learned the hard way that if he feeds special resources to the ocean you can't get them back. Even if you pull the land back out of the sea it'll be bare.

Neruz
Jul 23, 2012

A paragon of manliness

Tehan posted:

I learned the hard way that if he feeds special resources to the ocean you can't get them back. Even if you pull the land back out of the sea it'll be bare.

Special resources are highly soluble and must be kept away from water at all times.

sullat
Jan 9, 2012

Tehan posted:

I learned the hard way that if he feeds special resources to the ocean you can't get them back. Even if you pull the land back out of the sea it'll be bare.

Can you dump enemy cities into the sea or kill them by turning them into mountains?

Mzbundifund
Nov 5, 2011

I'm afraid so.
Sadly you can't change the elevation on city tiles.

Veloxyll
May 3, 2011

Fuck you say?!

Neruz posted:

Special resources are highly soluble and must be kept away from water at all times.

Also must be kept away from mountains. As I recall, certain tile raising hyjinks also destroy special resources. permenantly.

JcDent
May 13, 2013

Give me a rifle, one round, and point me at Berlin!
Chapter 12: Dragons of Color



Nol Ulcarn was under siege. The city didn‘t put much opposition, so the Honour guard could just swoop in from their camp in the hills, hack at the gates a little, and then retire back for drinks.

There was a reason fo that: most of the defending elves have already been killed fighting the monsters in the surrounding area.

Correction: there had been a reason for that. A nearby Koatl temple was already destroyed under the relentless advance of Svarts.



And Sir Hugue, never a man to back away from a challange, was currently fighting two giant turles. With a bit of help from his far away mentor, the turtles were losing.



If Svarts hacking at one‘s gates were a problem, a flying ghost ship firing cannons at your walls was an even bigger problem.



“How do they set rocks on fire?”

“That be no ordinary rocks and no ordinary flame. These ghosts burn with lust for vengeance!”



And more Svarts were teleported in to subdue the wild the continent.

“I swear, there’s already moss growing between my armor plates. I hate this place!”



Back in Howling Sorrow, human warriors kept flooding through the gates. Dirty and unkempt, armed with whatever bits of steel they could find, they were great in one thing only: numbers.

“More enemies means more glory, lads.”



“Well, at least our lord says that Krel seems to be in an agreable mood. Maybe we won't have to turn Plains of Blood into actual plains of blood”



“Uh-oh”



“That turned out alright, so it seems”





Volundr was down on his knees and heaving water.

“MY FORGE!”



“The order stands: drive deep into Long Shores, tear the shard apart, but find that whirpool!”

“I promise to be back with you all soon... so soon”



Nor Ulcarn had fallen and Svarts were marching down the streets... and out through the other hate.

“You there! Elf!”

“Who, me?”

“You're the new military governor! Make sure the city stays productive or I'll skin ya!”



Svart really had their hands full...of enemies! The lands to the west of the elvish city were craggy and forested, and filled with various monsters.



"Today, my esteemed readers, we shall speak of Trolls. For a long time -- indeed, since the collapse of the Gigantic Midget Tower -- these magnificent monsters were considered extinct. Evidence of this ancient race could only be seen on tapestries or in an exhibit in the Royal Museum, called "The pee stain of the Troll slain by King Marius IV". But to our great suprise Trolls were not so easy to destroy after all. Remnants of species were discovered by Jacques Gnar de Crunch, the naturalist, during the Troubles. Later, Trolls gladly and extensively multiplied (thanks to the infinite wisdom of our Great Mage), and their population is no longer in danger of extinction. Today, like 300 years ago, you can encounter these green giants in any market in Ardania, merrily swinging their clubs about. Trolls stand out from other monsters owning to their size, strenght, the speed at which they heal -- not to mention their unhurried thought processes."
From "The Evergreen Ones", an article written by the noble werewolf Wolfus de Crunch.


Renegade trolls were mucking about in the hills, quite the sizeable nuisance for any warband in the region.



“Life elementals are not quite as harmless as they seem. Many hunters for their valuable healing substance have proven that it is worse to die from an excess of life in the body than from wounds”

And swirling green cloud, usually called life elementals, roamed the countryside, lost in this land of actually living.



“Flogging Peasants, Flaying Nobles And Other Acceptable Means of Conducting Realm Towards Accumulation Of Wealth”

“And you say the ghost ship just fished it out of sea? Well, I'll pass it to our king when I can”





“ANOTHER gauntlet of death? Well, isn't that just interesting...”



The ghastly ship had reached the edge of the shard. It lingered over the mountain a little before sailing off to harass a leviathan.



A caravan of Svarts was making its way through the jungle.

“I hate this place. And sprocket donkeys are all fouled up”

“Argh, shut your trap. Our lord wants us to wash the gate with mana, so we will do it”



“See? Back to the elf town, boys. There might not be wenches there, but I bet they still have booze”



“Flying knight strikes again! Yes, flee, flee, you covardly fish!”



“Now then, to look for a bloated corpse, possibly hugging a scroll box to his chest”



“No, this is just a hedge wizard and his collection of somewhat magical trinkets he used to sell to dupes”



“Ah, here it is!”



“Alright, the elves have these puoches. Whenever you're cut, just grind them, mix them with water and apply it to the wound. And whatever you do, don't smoke it”

“THE SKY IS MADE OF DIAMONDS”

“Krolm give me strength, that idiot smoked it, didn't he? Capture him before he hurts himself”



Sir Hugue slept in the shade of the leaves. He wasn't tossing nor turning, yet still he was talking in his dreams.

“...If by setting one's heart right every morning and evening, one is able to live as though his body were already dead, he gains freedom in the Way. His whole life will be without blame, and he will succeed in his calling...”

His donkey was a lot more silent.



“Your Highness! Now cast the new spell and you will win this duel!”

“Like I said: I am the greatest of all!”



“Your Highness! You have cast a spell never seen before! That is a true feat even for a Great Mage – now your name will be forever added to Alley of Magic stars!”

“Like I said: I am the greatest of all!!!”



“I am very impressed, my colleague! You have shown that there is no end to magic and its spells! Maybe you really do have a chance to defeat the United One. I am looking forward to meeting you in Ardania. And... Good luck!”

“LIKE I SAID: I AM THE GREATEST OF ALL!!!”

“All right, you lot, disperse, nothing to look at here”

Mumbling Svarts left the square where a small wooden stage stood. Only a ring of Honorable warriors and rune warrior auxilia surounded it and three actors: one dressed in dark rags and black planks that poorly imitated King Lich's armor, another colored purple and likely playing Espritster.

“By order of Rurik, you are arrested for spreading subversive ideas, staging a play without permission from Guild of Actors, driving a pageant cart while drunk, as well as numerous crimes against writing, theatre and act of acting itself. You may also be charged for insulting the audience's intelligence. What say you?”

The acting troupe looked on to the surrounding troops before the one playing King Lich stepped forward...

“ I say...”

He said while drawing a hidden axe...

“DEATH TO THE DEAD USURPER! For freedom!”

The whole troupe quite literally jumped the troops that came to arrest them.

“Aw Sorrows, to arms!”

A Rune Warrior spun her axe and cut down an 'actor' dressed like crude immitation of Veremoud down.
“Cut them down, but leave at least one alive! We need to know if someone organized them!

And as the Svarts brawled in a melee, a tall shadow flashed a content grin and disappeared into an alleyway.

Normally, I don't like to break the flow of LP to say something, especially since my explanations lack finesse and other things that would help not sound like a scrub, but whoever wrote this quest end series of dialogue is a twat that makes your Great Mage sound like a hysterical drooling idiot



Poor immitations or no, King Lich did cast a spell to summon a dragon.

“Summoning a dragon... None have done it before... It feels... good”





"The rainbow dragons are creatures of legends and myths. To be fair, in search of rare creatures I've been to all the worlds, but I have never seen a Rainbow Dragon. I believe that if they ever existed, they are long extinct. More likely they have always been a product of the rich imaginations of the ancients."
(from the travel notes of "Wild Monsters" by famous researcher Sir Atten Vidborough)


The Rainbow dragong flapped his wings around, nodded in a approval to see a land free of Dremer and flew off to fight for his first lord in eons.

Neruz
Jul 23, 2012

A paragon of manliness
Huh, I'd have expected you to run into at least one other kind of sealed gate than just the obelisk spell by now.

Rainbow Dragons are pretty nice, no breath attack which is sad but they are absolute tanks and relatively cheap by dragon standards. Get a few levels on them and they start unlocking unique dragon upgrades which are all excellent and a leveled Rainbow Dragon can be an absolute beast.

Neruz fucked around with this message at 09:15 on Aug 29, 2014

Bloodly
Nov 3, 2008

Not as strong as you'd expect.
Meh. Ino-co is Russian-based. There has been similar weirdness in the text of the later Majesty expansions and well as the various King's Bounty games. It does not excuse it. It does explain it-somewhat.

Deceitful Penguin
Feb 16, 2011
They don't really seem to take non-Russian feedback too, from what I read in the negative reviews of some they games. Pretty sad.

Still, it's all in good fun.

Torrannor
Apr 27, 2013

---FAGNER---
TEAM-MATE
I have to say, that rainbow dragon looks nice and is a change from the usual chromatic/metallic dragons of D&D lore.

We have Svarts, Planestriders, Humans and Elves now. What is missing, only Undead and Monster towns, right?

aerion111
Nov 29, 2011

Prodigy of Curiosity.
Master of Jacks.
Apprentice of Masks.
And, when fighting the forces of darkness, always remember: "Armor of Darkness, Weapon of Light"

Torrannor posted:

I have to say, that rainbow dragon looks nice and is a change from the usual chromatic/metallic dragons of D&D lore.

We have Svarts, Planestriders, Humans and Elves now. What is missing, only Undead and Monster towns, right?

'Rainbow' or 'Prismatic' dragons aren't that uncommon, generally speaking.
A few 'big'-ish rogue-likes have them.
A quick google-search showed me that even the DnD SRD has a Prismatic Dragon - it's tougher than a Green Dragon, but has less treasure (2x standard, rather than 3x), and I think strictly speaking it's not a True Dragon. Which means the CR 66 Great Wyrm Prismatic Dragon is as much a dragon as some CR 1/2 (or 1, I dunno) Dragonwrought Kobold Cleric.
And of course, Yu-Gi-Oh has several cards of prismatic dragons, rainbow dragons, humanoid rainbow dragons, robotic rainbow dragons, etcetera.
Heck, some descriptions of dragons in worlds that do not have separate 'species' mention the scales shifting like oil as they fly past (so, like the paint on some fancy cars, I guess?)

Their 'upkeep' not containing food is great since food is the only thing you can't stockpile (technically half the surplus food gets converted to gold. But you're better off just making 'just enough' food and making gold directly)
With enough cast-speed-enhancers you can summon quite a few creatures in a few turns, but if they take food you'll not be able to keep up the summoned armor (or you'll need to have far more spare food than you normally need)
Magical armies are quite flexible - summon the monster that's strong against the opponents you're facing that exact moment, and then buff them to be even stronger. It's a bit like playing Rock Paper Scissors and having the opponent 'choose' first.
But, I'm not a fan of their complete lack of armor, nor their melee-only attack.
The second is easy enough to fix, if you have gone down that route of research, but the first cannot truly be 'fixed' (especially since they're a Monster type and can't wear armor that'd normally help)

Neruz
Jul 23, 2012

A paragon of manliness
Prismatic Dragons were part of the Epic rules for 3.5 and so their 'realness' is debatable. There is no actual lore about them for example, they only exist as a statblock. They are also less rainbow coloured dragons and more light dragons, being surrounded by a shimmering halo of refracted light and breathing a bright cone of multicoloured light that dazes and stuns.


As for Rainbow Dragons, they're more than tough enough to be able to survive well even without access to the humanoid armor upgrades and the fact that they don't eat gigantic amounts of food like almost all other Dragons is great, you can have dozens of Rainbow Dragons flying around being huge assholes but it's next to impossible to get more than a handful of normal dragons up and about because of their gargantuan food costs. Rainbow Dragons aren't as good as normal Dragons but they are cheaper, available earlier and able to be massed in much greater numbers which makes them much more useful from a practical standpoint.

Mzbundifund
Nov 5, 2011

I'm afraid so.
The rainbow dragon is a weird sort of summon. Their pure melee damage makes them less useful the longer the game goes on, as you encounter more enemies resistant to/immune to the common damage types, but early in the game they cost so much mana you're unlikely to be able to field more than two or three. On the other hand you're forced to summon at least one to end the Elspirister terraforming attacks, which is a strong incentive to get one on the field as soon as possible, when they're still useful. My required one usually ends up pretty high level from pushing over mid-level monster lairs, but if it dies later in the game I don't usually bother summoning another one.

kvx687
Dec 29, 2009

Soiled Meat
I find their main niche is as a flying city-taker. I tend to go for small armies composed mostly of high-level promoted ranged units, and the rainbow dragon can get up to five movement very early on. They have enough health to survive a few hits, but low damage and armor, so they don't fight very well, but they're great for grabbing a 1-health city.

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Neruz
Jul 23, 2012

A paragon of manliness

Mzbundifund posted:

The rainbow dragon is a weird sort of summon. Their pure melee damage makes them less useful the longer the game goes on, as you encounter more enemies resistant to/immune to the common damage types, but early in the game they cost so much mana you're unlikely to be able to field more than two or three. On the other hand you're forced to summon at least one to end the Elspirister terraforming attacks, which is a strong incentive to get one on the field as soon as possible, when they're still useful. My required one usually ends up pretty high level from pushing over mid-level monster lairs, but if it dies later in the game I don't usually bother summoning another one.

Shortly after you get the spell, assuming you rush to get the spell asap there is a window in which you can summon a few Rainbow Dragons. If you can babysit them and keep them fighting things they can kill to level them up they'll stay fairly relevant throughout the entire game and lategame ~3 upgraded Rainbow Dragons can make the endgame grind much easier by being super-fast ninja city flatteners.

If you lose one though then yeah there's not a whole lot of reason to summon more. Any you summon after the window will be unable to level up enough to be worth their expense.

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