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Chard
Aug 24, 2010




CommissarMega posted:

I actually thought Gears of War first :smithicide:

I've never even played a Gears game but my mind immediately went there too.

e: watching more of this video and the customization and scars and junk is going to be awesome to play dressup with :sparkles:

Chard fucked around with this message at 16:56 on Aug 8, 2015

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Luhood
Nov 13, 2012

Chard posted:

e: watching more of this video and the customization and scars and junk is going to be awesome to play dressup with :sparkles:

It's like The Sims, but with Guns and Aliens!

RickVoid
Oct 21, 2010

Luhood posted:

It's like The Sims, but with Guns and Aliens!

Oh, oh god.

I'm have a Spore flashback/anxiety attack.
:negative:

(Not really, but it's the first place I went to when I read that line.)

Speedball
Apr 15, 2008

Scientists and engineers are individuals you assign to rooms with names, too.

That ought to make the narrative fun, haha.

thetruegentleman
Feb 5, 2011

You call that potato a Trump avatar?

THIS is a Trump Avatar!

Speedball posted:

Scientists and engineers are individuals you assign to rooms with names, too.

That ought to make the narrative fun, haha.

'Cept for us "efficiency" oriented folk: our cities in Civ have such wonderful names as "Capital", "City 4", and "Island City 0". As such, the names of the scientists shall be: "Lab Rat 2", "Heal Bitch 1", and "Mister Misc".

At least the soldiers have names that sort of fit, like Native Americans named after their spirit animal: only instead of "Whispering Mouse" or "Wise Jackal", they'll be "Rungun Aggro" and "Medkit DenseSmoke". Feel free to use either of those as your Counterstrike handle, name thieves.

Stephen9001
Oct 28, 2013

Speedball posted:

Scientists and engineers are individuals you assign to rooms with names, too.

That ought to make the narrative fun, haha.

As will the fact Shen pretty much gave his life making the Avenger, into well, the Avenger, and we have his daughter to carry on his legacy. Also, since Vahlen is described as "lost" not dead, I'm willing to bet we'll find her again at some point. Oh, and I'm sure the fact you put an individual engineer in the proving grounds to make a somewhat random thing will be good fun too, in an LP in this style, you could have the commander go like "you there, I want to see what you can do.", the engineer is like "uh, okay" and they make say, venom rounds, and the commander and the soldiers can be like "Nice! This stuff is great! Excellent work dude!". Obviously that's a simplification, but you get the general idea.

I can have moments of... eccentricity and sometimes be quite curious about things. Please forgive me if I do something foolish or rude.

kaosdrachen
Aug 15, 2011

Stephen9001 posted:

Also, since Vahlen is described as "lost" not dead, I'm willing to bet we'll find her again at some point.

Almost certainly, although I do note they leave it up in the air as to whether this'll be "Great news, we found her" or "... Oh gently caress, we've found her and god's little fish in trousers what has she DONE?"

Stephen9001
Oct 28, 2013

kaosdrachen posted:

Almost certainly, although I do note they leave it up in the air as to whether this'll be "Great news, we found her" or "... Oh gently caress, we've found her and god's little fish in trousers what has she DONE?"

Oh yes, how good or bad a thing finding her will be is certainly far from certain. But it is almost guaranteed we will find her. Worst case scenario, she is working for ADVENT and for whatever reason does not wish to re-join XCOM. If that happens... well. "BAD" doesn't do it justice.

Best case scenario? I'm unsure, though "brings with her some kinda deus ex machina" would be up there.

I can have moments of... eccentricity and sometimes be quite curious about things. Please forgive me if I do something foolish or rude.

CommissarMega
Nov 18, 2008

THUNDERDOME LOSER
She'd dating a Snake, read my fanfic to find out more.

Chard
Aug 24, 2010




thetruegentleman posted:

At least the soldiers have names that sort of fit, like Native Americans named after their spirit animal: only instead of "Whispering Mouse" or "Wise Jackal", they'll be "Rungun Aggro" and "Medkit DenseSmoke". Feel free to use either of those as your Counterstrike handle, name thieves.

So, Dirty Duck, Gray Fox, and Liquid Ocelot walk into the XCOM cantina...

Stephen9001
Oct 28, 2013

Chard posted:

So, Dirty Duck, Gray Fox, and Liquid Ocelot walk into the XCOM cantina...

And the Commander questions how useful they will be against the aliens.

I can have moments of... eccentricity and sometimes be quite curious about things. Please forgive me if I do something foolish or rude.

Speedball
Apr 15, 2008

So I've gone from being depressed about myself to depressed about horrific current events, give me more time, guys. Jesus.

Klaus88
Jan 23, 2011

Violence has its own economy, therefore be thoughtful and precise in your investment

Speedball posted:

So I've gone from being depressed about myself to depressed about horrific current events, give me more time, guys. Jesus.

Stop reading Debate and Discussion Speedball. :argh:

Stephen9001
Oct 28, 2013

Speedball posted:

So I've gone from being depressed about myself to depressed about horrific current events, give me more time, guys. Jesus.

Uh, so this is probably kind of personal, but might I please ask what current events have gotten you depressed? You don't have to answer if you don't want to, I'm just curious and think that if we knew what is getting you down, it would be easier for us to re-assure you, or whatever. Again, you don't have to say if you don't want to, and I'm sorry if I'm overstepping my boundaries.

Regardless, we will be here for you if you need a place to vent or whatever.

I can have moments of... eccentricity and sometimes be quite curious about things. Please forgive me if I do something foolish or rude.

berryjon
May 30, 2011

I have an invasion to go to.

Stephen9001 posted:

Uh, so this is probably kind of personal,

If your statement begins with that line, or words to that effect:

DON'T loving ASK IT.

I'm pretty sure this exact point has been raised in this thread before. Let me check...

Stephen9001 posted:

Edit: removed due to being rude.


Oh wait. IT WAS YOU. Could you possibly learn your lesson sometime?

biosterous
Feb 23, 2013




Stephen9001 posted:

Uh, so this is probably kind of personal

This is where you should think about what you wrote and then not post.

Rumda
Nov 4, 2009

Moth Lesbian Comrade

Stephen9001 posted:

Uh, so this is probably kind of personal,.

Maybe don't post unless its something about the game perhaps?

The Iron Rose
May 12, 2012

:minnie: Cat Army :minnie:

Stephen9001 posted:

Uh, so this is probably kind of personal, but might I please ask what current events have gotten you depressed? You don't have to answer if you don't want to, I'm just curious and think that if we knew what is getting you down, it would be easier for us to re-assure you, or whatever. Again, you don't have to say if you don't want to, and I'm sorry if I'm overstepping my boundaries.

Regardless, we will be here for you if you need a place to vent or whatever.

Please stop posting.

Captain Foo
May 11, 2004

we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

Stephen9001 posted:

Uh, so this is probably kind of personal, but might I please ask what current events have gotten you depressed? You don't have to answer if you don't want to, I'm just curious and think that if we knew what is getting you down, it would be easier for us to re-assure you, or whatever. Again, you don't have to say if you don't want to, and I'm sorry if I'm overstepping my boundaries.

Regardless, we will be here for you if you need a place to vent or whatever.

:frogout: :frogout::frogout::frogout::frogout::frogout::frogout::frogout::frogout::frogout::frogout:

Siegkrow
Oct 11, 2013

Arguing about Lore for 5 years and counting



Stephen9001 posted:

Uh, so this is probably kind of personal

Steve, look, we get it, you got issues knowing when you shouldn't do something, but STOP ASKING QUESTIONS.

I'm not gonna be like these guys and tell you to stop posting period, but asking questions is ultimately rude and pre-apologizing and STILL DOING IT just makes it look like you just don't care.

Galick
Nov 26, 2011

Why does Khajiit have to go to prison this time?

Galick posted:

Okay, I wasn't going to post this, but you need to hear it.

Whenever you start to post, leave it up on the preview screen. And walk away for ten minutes. Come back, read it again, and pretend you weren't the one who wrote it and see how you feel about it. By this point, you should know that whenever you start a sentence with 'sorry for prying' or anything similar, you shouldn't even finish asking it.

Just loving do this. This goes beyond just having aspergers or whatever and being an idiot loving rear end in a top hat.

Jimmy4400nav
Apr 1, 2011

Ambassador to Moonlandia

Speedball posted:

So I've gone from being depressed about myself to depressed about horrific current events, give me more time, guys. Jesus.

Sorry to hear you've having a rough time right now Speedball, I'm wishing you the best.

Speedball
Apr 15, 2008

Actually feeling much better now, capturing tons of images for the update. Should be done by dinnertime at this rate. I hope. Thanks guys. I derive pleasure from entertaining others, heh.

W.T. Fits
Apr 21, 2010

Ready to Poyozo Dance all over your face.

Speedball posted:

Actually feeling much better now, capturing tons of images for the update. Should be done by dinnertime at this rate. I hope. Thanks guys. I derive pleasure from entertaining others, heh.

Glad to hear you're feeling better.

GhostStalker
Mar 26, 2010

Guys, find a woman who looks at you the way GhostStalker looks at every bald, obese, single 58 year old accountant from Tulsa who managed to win $4,000 by not wagering on a Final Jeopardy triple stumper.

Stephen9001 posted:

Uh, so this is probably kind of personal, but might I please ask what current events have gotten you depressed? You don't have to answer if you don't want to, I'm just curious and think that if we knew what is getting you down, it would be easier for us to re-assure you, or whatever. Again, you don't have to say if you don't want to, and I'm sorry if I'm overstepping my boundaries.

Dude, remember what I said to you the last time you tried to pester someone with questions that they were disinclined to answer like this on another board, right after you did it earlier in this thread? The thing with Peptuck's Vigil thread on the Spacebattles Creative Writing forums a couple months back that wasn't my thing to you about spoiler tags a couple days ago? Keep what I said there in mind and think for a moment before you ask stuff like this, man.

Speedball posted:

Actually feeling much better now, capturing tons of images for the update. Should be done by dinnertime at this rate. I hope. Thanks guys. I derive pleasure from entertaining others, heh.

Good to hear. I'll be glad to have this thread back on track...

Speedball
Apr 15, 2008

XCOM Part 49: The Whole Truth



So, this was America, 1962, but, y’know, pre-Woodstock, the part of the sixties that was really just the fifties in color. The Red Scare was in full effect and everyone in America was sure the Soviets were going to invade and destroy them all. Everyone except one guy, Director Faulk, who was positive that these strange new signals we were receiving from space were signals to alien sleeper agents. He’d been diverting resources to collect alien artifacts from old space probes.
How long have aliens been crashing on earth?
Not sure, but a long time. Not everyone out there has Faster-Than-Light travel, so it could take thousands of years to get around the galaxy. The “Elerium Mine” underneath Groom was just a bunch of ores from an ancient supply ship, for example. We think that disturbing it was what alerted aliens to our planet, the timing of it was a bit too coincidental. Anyway, Director Faulk was retrieving artifacts.



And this chain-smoking booze hound was his number-one guy in charge of the artifact in question, William Carter. Yeah, you know this story takes place in the sixties when the hero has serious substance abuse problems. Can’t blame him too much, because his whole family died in a fire while he was on duty. For some reason, it never seemed to affect his job performance as much as you’d think.



Some officer lady showed up to relieve him of the case, and that’s where things started to get weird.





She blasted Carter in the shoulder, opened up the case and that’s when we saw our first look at Sleepwalkers.



Whole swaths of the population had been infected with a mind-controlling nanomachine that made them cry black crap once it took over completely. She started kicking the poo poo out of Carter bare-handed, but then the thing in the case exploded.



Whatever was in there fried her to a crisp, but healed Carter’s wound. He had alien healing powers now.
Whoah. What was it?
Why would it heal someone but kill the other?
Good questions. Heh. Actually, Carter never really questioned it too much himself; he wasn’t a very inquisitive person for a secret agent, which is probably why he was on courier duty. And he didn’t get a chance to, either, because…



Aliens started coming out of nowhere, blowing up everything and shooting everybody.
Sectoids. They look different than the ones we fought. Those collars…
Slave collars. These guys were disposable grunts working for a higher power. The Director called them “Outsiders,” but they called themselves “Zudjari,” we later found out.



Long story short, Carter blew the poo poo out of a bunch of them with the help of some other guys I can’t be bothered to remember. We hooked up with Faulke, got what we could and got the hell out of there to the prototype XCOM facility.



This was 1962, conformity was king. Tons of anonymous caucasian G-men with identical clothes and interchangeable personalities. There are only a few people of note from back then. Director Faulke, and his top agent, Angela Weaver.



Spy agencies have been using women for centuries but never gave ‘em credit. Weaver was less of the “sneak around and pretend to be a waitress” type of spy and more of the “kill everyone in the room” type, all business. Of course, she had to be three times as tough as any of the dudes to get half the respect she was owed, so she compensated by being six times as tough. Blew away a Sleepwalker posing as a general right in front of me.



We lost communication with almost everyone. America was paralyzed, possibly the rest of the world as well, and it was down to a bunch of suits and geeks in front of space-age word processors to save it. Carter, Weaver and a bunch of disposable G.I. Joes went around the country defusing all sorts of problems.
Like what?



Let me put it to you like this: stopping the aliens from stealing all the nukes in America was considered a minor mission.
Yikes.



Zudjari technology let them build bases and facilities in minutes as they invaded. Fortunately, we were pretty good at asymmetrical warfare, especially because of the weird powers Carter was developing.



And we managed to rescue this guy, Dr. Alan Weir, for a specific reason. You see, the aliens were linked up to each other, cybernetically, in a hive-mind control system called MOSAIC. This guy was one of the best experts on computer code we could find, and the only guy who could speak the programming language the aliens were using.



We even captured an alien infiltrator and removed his Mosaic implant. He became much less aggressive the moment we did. No more orders from on high telling him to kill us all.



We could have slapped him around for information, but for some reason Carter decided to take a different tactic. Made the guy realize he was just a puppet of evil masterminds. He was confused and reluctant, but eventually saw things our way. Not that he knew much, being a pawn and all.
I could have made him talk.
Well, we didn’t have brain-scanning electrodes back then! Anyway, our plan, such as it was, was to kill the alien commander on Earth, find their home base and the Mosaic hub, take a makeshift UFO we were constructing to it, and blow it up.



It was getting worse across the world. The Sleepwalker infection was spread through the water, and only isolated military bases like ours were free of it. The infected’s brains started to burn out and they could only accept simple commands, but the command was usually to report to Zudjari slave barges. They marched to their own abduction. Whole towns were emptied without a shot fired.



Dr. Weir had a little combat experience himself and helped us bust that Mosaic network wide open, but he couldn’t override the commands to soldiers or keep the Sleepwalkers from marching to the abduction pods. Still, the information led us straight to the biggest alien mission sites.



We found the alien commander, Axis, and killed the poo poo out of him, but strangely, he knew Agent Carter, kept calling him “The Prisoner.”
Maybe he was a fan of Patrick McGoohan?
That show wasn’t out yet. We figured it was just a weird alien being weird.
Sounds like Patrick McGoohan to me…



Carter also had a weird reaction when they used their infiltrator test on him.



He was infected all along?
Nah, he wasn’t a sleepwalker, but whatever that alien junk had done to him to give him superpowers made him react badly to the test. He passed out. Director Faulke decided he was okay since he never started crying black crap from his eyes. Still, everyone was on edge around Carter after that.



You tried to assault the aliens in that? I’m amazed it even hovered, with 1960’s technology.
Dr. Weir was a fast study, and Zudjari technology was designed to be idiot-proof. We figured out from our captured infiltrator that they were invading the planet from a wormhole hidden in a dam, so the goal was to fly right through to their world, kill the mysterious alien overlord named Origin, drop a nuke on his Mosaic hub and, if we had time, get back to Earth.
A suicide mission. Hm. I think I see where this is going. You were Carter, weren’t you?
Hey! Who’s telling this story?



Origin himself turned out to be just another Zudjari, but hooked up to a giant machine he used to enslave everyone else. He was full of mystical bullshit none of us understood, talking about a demonic entity that was lying in wait upon our world, that he’d already bent one to his will.



Some sort of energy being that he’d captured, and was using to power his Mosaic network. It was a creature of the mind, you see, so he used it to enslave millions of minds.
Whoah.



Wait a minute. Four arms… is that?
The creature you fought… that was a shell, for this ethereal being. This is what they look like without a body. I think. Might be a different sub-species, there’s enough differences… anyhow, we killed the poo poo out of Origin and sucked up the Ethereal into an energy bracelet, set the nuke and got the hell out of there. That mystical bullshit he kept spouting didn’t make him nuke-proof, heh.



So… you won? What happened to the Ethereal?
We hadn’t won yet. The remaining Zudjari got less organized, but they didn’t stop fighting. It wasn’t a decapitation like we had hoped. Mosaic was a distributed network. It may have had a controller but it kept on going without the guy at the reins. As for the Ethereal…



It woke up where we were keeping it alive, in this big vat full of elerium. Then it started talking to me, which was really weird.



What did it say?
You don’t understand.



It wasn’t talking to Carter.



It was talking to me.
Wait a minute… what!?
Huh?!



The thing in the case…
Honestly, I was as surprised as anyone else. I’d never had anything but Carter’s memories, never seen anything but what Carter saw. But those alien superpowers had to come from somewhere, didn’t they?
What?!
Ah, you’ve arrived.



Back the gently caress up! The Commander is an ALIEN!?!
Don’t be a loving racist. I’m Ethereal-American.



To Be Continued!

Speedball fucked around with this message at 21:17 on Aug 22, 2015

Drakenel
Dec 2, 2008

The glow is a guide, my friend. Though it falls to you to avert catastrophe, you will never fight alone.
:allears:

Whoever called it being the ethereal controlling Carter? right on the money.

Section Z
Oct 1, 2008

Wait, this is the Moon.
How did I even get here?

Pillbug
Please keep feeling cool, and also making the cool things. TIA.

Stephen9001
Oct 28, 2013
Glorious. A+ Speedball! would read (sorta predictable) revelation again.

And glad to hear your feeling better now.

I can have moments of... eccentricity and sometimes be quite curious about things. Please forgive me if I do something foolish or rude.

Redeye Flight
Mar 26, 2010

God, I'm so tired. What the hell did I post last night?
I could never beat that loving dam level. The Bureau is actually a fairly brutal shooter at certain points, particularly if you're not treating your dudes as expendable. You can do some interesting stuff with it but you're simultaneously your team's primary healer AND primary damage, so you're REALLY stretched thin.

Spent about two weeks on one particular checkpoint in that New Mexican pillar thing...

CommissarMega
Nov 18, 2008

THUNDERDOME LOSER
I'll be honest, I was expecting the boss to be Dr. Weir. This is far more :allears: than I thought it'd be.

MaskedHuzzah
Mar 26, 2009

Come now! Look me in the eye and tell me - isn't this the face of a guy you can trust?
Lipstick Apathy

Speedball posted:

Don’t be a loving racist. I’m Ethereal-American.


While I have enjoyed this entire LP, I found this line almost irrationally funny. Good work!

Ghostwoods
May 9, 2013

Say "Cheese!"
:golfclap:

Glazius
Jul 22, 2007

Hail all those who are able,
any mouse can,
any mouse will,
but the Guard prevail.

Clapping Larry
What I wouldn't give to see the paperwork at the INS for this guy.

Tarezax
Sep 12, 2009

MORT cancels dance: interrupted by MORT
Well, considering the state of its memories, I think it's fair to say that it was "born" in the moment it attached itself to Carter. Therefore, having been born on US soil, the Commander is a full US citizen by right of birth. Jus soli, motherfuckers!

radintorov
Feb 18, 2011
Since the Commander is the Ethereal from The Bureau, I take it that Cobra Commander was Carter?

Deadmeat5150
Nov 21, 2005

OLD MAN YELLS AT CLAN

CommissarMega posted:

I'll be honest, I was expecting the boss to be Dr. Weir. This is far more :allears: than I thought it'd be.

I did too. This is soooooooo much better.

wafflemoose
Apr 10, 2009

Okay, I was not expecting that. :stare:

W.T. Fits
Apr 21, 2010

Ready to Poyozo Dance all over your face.

Speedball posted:

Back the gently caress up! The Commander is an ALIEN!?!
Don’t be a loving racist. I’m Ethereal-American.

I loving lost it at this. This was definitely worth the wait. :golfclap:

Also, you're making me want to play The Bureau. Knock it off. :argh:

(Don't actually knock it off.) :allears:

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thetruegentleman
Feb 5, 2011

You call that potato a Trump avatar?

THIS is a Trump Avatar!

Redeye Flight posted:

I could never beat that loving dam level. The Bureau is actually a fairly brutal shooter at certain points, particularly if you're not treating your dudes as expendable. You can do some interesting stuff with it but you're simultaneously your team's primary healer AND primary damage, so you're REALLY stretched thin.

Spent about two weeks on one particular checkpoint in that New Mexican pillar thing...

Seriously? I thought the dam was one of the easiest levels in the game. Try using a Commando and a Medic: you can max out pretty much everyone on your roster by that point if you don't make more than a few people, and those two classes are the best in the game. The Commando deals the best damage, can stun people with his shockwave, and can put a shield over anyone in danger. The Medic makes everyone tougher, and can also make a shield.

Everything else comes down to Carter using his abilities to break a stalemate: you don't even need to flank people if you keep using the right abilities at the right time...and never take the tactician pack off your AI slaves.

Anyway, the big reveal: this is actually implied to be canon. Don't want to risk any spoilers, obviously, but there are a fair amount of clues in Xcom: Declassified suggesting this to be the case.

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