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Retro Futurist
Aug 8, 2007

Yesterday's Tomorrow,
Today!




Arrakis, commonly known as the planet Dune. A sprawling and vast desert planet that is the galaxy’s only known source of the highly addictive spice melange. The spice is the key to precognitive space travel, letting pilots steer their vessels safely throughout space, and the backbone to all travel.

The great House Atreides, from the home planet of Caladan and led by the great Duke mr capps Atreides, has been appointed custodian of Arrakis, and granted sole rights to harvest the spice from the sandy wasteland.

But another house, House Harkonnen and its Baron anime gently caress pillow, has decided that the weak Atreides are undeserving of the power and wealth of Arrakis, and with the secret backing of the Emperor has launched an offensive to kill the Duke, and steal the spice production for himself.

The two Houses have an enmity lasting centuries, but finally, this battle of combat and intrigue will lead to the destruction of one house, and the everlasting power of its mortal enemy.


Welcome to the game thread of this soldiers mafialike. I am your handsome mod Opopanax, and am much friendlier than the other thread mod Opopanax. I am your first port of call for game related questions. The original rules thread can be found here for you to reference

The enemy thread, which you are NOT allowed to post in, but you may read, may be found here

The second post contains the status of the relevant battlefields that can be fought over, as well as the playerlist for this thread.

Rules and Information

Retro Futurist fucked around with this message at Sep 3, 2014 around 03:06

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Retro Futurist
Aug 8, 2007

Yesterday's Tomorrow,
Today!





The Duke - Mod confirmed town-aligned

Duke Capps Atreides - Lord of this Great House and thread

The soldiers

  1. apostateCourier
  2. Asiina100YrsofAttitude
  3. Brazen Apothecary
  4. Ernie.
  5. Fat Samurai
  6. GulagDolls
  7. Hal Incandenza
  8. King Burgundy
  9. Little Mac
  10. Magnus Gallant
  11. merk
  12. mr.capps
  13. natx
  14. Propaganda Machine
  15. Tremendous Taste
  16. winvirus
  17. Your Personal Muse


BATTLEFIELDS:

Arrakeen -
The heartland of the Good empire
Atriedes benefit: The Atreides Duke can appoint an extra frontline defender to battles in this battleground.
Harkonnen benefit: If the Harkonnen raiding party wins, the Harkonnen Baron may target and instantly ##kill one player in the opposing thread (except the enemy King).

Sietch Tabr - desert
A vast network of caves and tunnels. Many native or ancient artefacts can be found in hidden caches here.
Desert Environment: A sandworm appears in 50% of battles here. Shielded combatants each have a 20% risk of being eaten by a sandworm.
Victor benefit: The victorious army raids the secret caches of the ancient Fremen. Great artifacts can be recovered, but some may not have lasted the travails of time. If combatants decide to ##loot instead of taking part in the battle. The number of artifacts looted is based on the number of total ##loot actions, but only the battle’s victorious army gets to loot, losers drop their ##loot for the victorious army in their haste to escape!


Windtrap Expanse
”Bless the Maker and all His Water. Bless the coming and going of Him. May His passing cleanse the world. May He keep the world for his people” - Fremen saying.

Windtraps collect vital water from the cooled nighttime air of Arrakeen. Control of the water supply is vital to such a parched land, and this vast rocky outcrop is a key location to deny to the enemy.

Victor: surviving members of the battle here gain Augment All 1 for the next day’s battle. (+1 to all damaging abilities)
Loser: The losing side’s surviving raiders gain the Parched debuff, which lasts until they win a windtrap battle (-1 to current and max Stamina).

Spice Field Delta - Deep Desert
“He who controls the spice, controls the universe” - Baron Vladimir Harkonnen. Of course there are risks too - the Shai-hulud, giant sandworms, feel and are attracted to the agitation and vibration in the sand.
Deep Desert Environment - due to the abundance of sandworms in this zone, shields may not be used, rendering ballistics more effective. (all Ranged attacks gain +2 to damage) a sandworm is always attracted to battles here, and Ranged rank characters each have a 20% chance of being eaten by a sandworm after the healing phase of battle.

Victor Benefit: The victorious army controls the spice fields, granting the ruler improved boons.

Carthag
The seat of the Harkonnen’s power. The ostentatious fortification will be heavily defended. It would take a brave force to attempt this raid.

Harkonnen Benefit: The Harkonnen Baron may select an additional frontline defender for battles.
Atreides Benefit: If your raiding party wins, the Atriedes Duke may instantly ##kill one player in the opposing thread (except the enemy ruler).

Retro Futurist fucked around with this message at Sep 6, 2014 around 20:39

GulagDolls
Jun 4, 2011



why am i listed as player and not replacement.

Magnus Gallant
Mar 9, 2010

by Lowtax


Grimey Drawer

Woooooo were the best

Retro Futurist
Aug 8, 2007

Yesterday's Tomorrow,
Today!


GulagDolls posted:

why am i listed as player and not replacement.

Someone joined but then they died tragically so you were put in

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


Hi, I will begin working on our national anthem immediately

apostateCourier
Oct 9, 2012



mr.capps posted:

Hi, I will begin working on our national anthem immediately

I look forward to this with hesitant glee.

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


also reminder, I am actually Yang Wen-li who fell into a time vortex and found himself in this mysterious world where I decided to cosplay as the Duke guy from Dune.

GulagDolls
Jun 4, 2011



well im going to post as little as possible and roll dice for all my moves or whatever.

Retro Futurist
Aug 8, 2007

Yesterday's Tomorrow,
Today!


GulagDolls posted:

well im going to post as little as possible and roll dice for all my moves or whatever.

That's pretty much how I'm modding so cool

merk
May 20, 2003



My Duke. *tips space fedora*

busb
Mar 19, 2009

Thorgie

Role PMs will go out either later tonight or tomorrow, at which point players will assign their stats (which will be their confirmation)

Little Mac
Jan 3, 2006

Super Mario Bros 3

hello my house is in the desert. i live alone in a house in the desert and I would really like it if we would not fight battles on the desert (that is where my house is)

Your Personal Muse
Oct 5, 2010


I don't remember electing that Duke

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


50 pounds of bread - his name refers to the amount of fiber he shits out daily, because he is a fatass

CapitalistPig - can't say anything too mean because his girlfriend has cancer

CCKeane - i was in a skype call with this guy and he literally has the voice of a loving ringleader of a spooky circus who kidnaps children that 2 kid detectives have to defeat.

chaoslord - you can't be a loving lord of chaos it makes no loving sense, like if you are a lord, that means you are lawful and crap jesus christ this loving rear end in a top hat

DGK9000 - suprsingly this is a common nick name amongst males for their dick

dorkanoid - the most appropriate username

Jakep - sometimes i read this as a jakepees and i giggle

Juanito - imagined i put a compliment here, the point of this is to cause direst amongst the other thread because i may or may not have received a pm that juanito is a spy working for us. is he? who said that?

Little Mac -

Lumpen -

MEDS CURES SCHIZOS - username backwards is: SOZICHS SERUC SDEM which is latin for "clown carcass lover"

meinburg - this guy is probably the only person here who read the entire dune series, and he enjoys it all, what a dork

Pinterest Mum - reads jame patternson novels, enjoys them

Puntification - inspiration for the 2nd little piggy whose house gets blown down by the big bad wolf

Rarity - was the understudy in her high school play for the role of "hag mother idiot fucker #1"

Somberbrero - when asked the question "if you could have any super power, what would it be" answered "batman"

in other words we already won this game

Retro Futurist
Aug 8, 2007

Yesterday's Tomorrow,
Today!


Mac is in our thread now. He's right behind you!

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


anime gently caress pillow posted:

Death will be swift, Duke Leto Anime.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4VTBam8YzQg

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


(you are the little bastard)

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


(just wanted to make sure that was clear)

King Burgundy
Sep 17, 2003

I am the Burgundy King,
I can do anything!

FYI, this is going to be an unexpectedly busy week for me, I'll do my best to not be a lurker rear end in a top hat, but no promises.

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


King Burgundy posted:

FYI, this is going to be an unexpectedly busy week for me, I'll do my best to not be a lurker rear end in a top hat, but no promises.

i will forgive you if you chose a rival from the other thread and immediately start trashing talking them

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


if you have trouble trash talking i suggest meinberg he is kinda easy to make fun of

GulagDolls
Jun 4, 2011



assign us all anime characters and also when eight dollars winvirus and i all met up for lunch the one thing we all agreed on immediately was how we hated meinberg

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


GulagDolls posted:

assign us all anime characters and also when eight dollars winvirus and i all met up for lunch the one thing we all agreed on immediately was how we hated meinberg

lina inverse

King Burgundy
Sep 17, 2003

I am the Burgundy King,
I can do anything!

mr.capps posted:

i will forgive you if you chose a rival from the other thread and immediately start trashing talking them

Man, 50 pounds of Bread, even his username is useless. That is a crushingly useless amount of bread that only worthless hoarders would possess.

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


here are your animes

apostatecourier - spike from cowboy bebop

Asiina - sailor moon

Brazen Apothecary - the dog from cowboy bebop

Ernie - goku

Fat Samurai - hip hop samurai guy from samurai champloo

Hal Incandenza - beat from the world ends with you

Little Mac - little mac

King Burgandy - king dedede

Magnus - joshua from the world ends with you

merk - phoniex wright

natx - mickey mouse

Propaganda Machine - cloud strife

Tremendous Taste - anime iron man

winvirus - boy from original gundam

Your Personal Muse - hitler boy from orginal gundam, you are rivals with win but you must now work together when you fell into the vortex that led you here

Ernie.
Aug 31, 2012



mr.capps posted:

Ernie - goku

the legend lives on~

GulagDolls
Jun 4, 2011



gihren is no boy

Brazen Apothecary
Apr 9, 2007

NIGHTCREWBESTCREW

I am THE beST ~~~~~~~~~~




also this is p accurate

apostateCourier
Oct 9, 2012



mr.capps posted:

here are your animes

apostatecourier - spike from cowboy bebop


I'd be annoyed at being misgendered but Spike's pretty great.

Retro Futurist
Aug 8, 2007

Yesterday's Tomorrow,
Today!


Capps make me anime iron man or I'll shut this whole thread down right now.

Or anime wolverine I guess

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


Opopanax posted:

Capps make me anime iron man or I'll shut this whole thread down right now.

Or anime wolverine I guess

anime... loki

GulagDolls
Jun 4, 2011



Retro Futurist
Aug 8, 2007

Yesterday's Tomorrow,
Today!


Thread, you have chosen your king wisely.

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


anime gently caress pillow posted:

I will not speak further ill of my opponents of Atriedes Anime - They are merely misguided, and it is our job to correct their worldview. I know that some of you may feel strongly against violence, but know this: They will kill us if we do not kill them. We are a force among which none other can stand. We are strong of arm and will, to be sure, but it is our hearts and the knowledge that we fight for the good of Arrakis that will lead us to our inevitable victory. I will be commissioning a song to which you may bravely fight for your nation shortly. Worry not of your lives, for you will always live in the hearts of your countrymen. Worry not for your families, for they will be well taken care of. Worry not for your freedom, for that is something which the Anime can never take from you. Long live Harkonnen!

here is my speech

in the game of soldiers mafia there are no winners, there are no losers. no, this war isn't a game, its a battle of ideologies. to win is to live, to lose is to die. the winners are the living, the losers are the dead man, the spoils of victory is the ideology left behind.

so the question men, is what do we fight for? is it kings? is it for your life? the values you and your comrades believe in?

i don't know why you fight men, i am not even sure if your heart is with our factions beliefs, the belief in love, comradeship, and just being a good person overall in general. i don't care, because you are my men, my people. you are what i fight for.

if we are to be winners, let us live together, if we are to be losers, let us die together.

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


also gently caress the police
gently caress the patriarchy
and socialism rules

#TeamAtreides

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


in other news the other thread is talking about the mechanics of the game and i have no clue what the gently caress they are talking about lol

King Burgundy
Sep 17, 2003

I am the Burgundy King,
I can do anything!

mr.capps posted:

in other news the other thread is talking about the mechanics of the game and i have no clue what the gently caress they are talking about lol

Oh noes! We are relying on you to understand the game. Lord knows most of us probably don't. I think I'll be assigning my stats at random!

Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
a post


oh no we'll lose then

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Snooze Cruise
Feb 16, 2013

check it out
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but i just gave an inspiring speech so we can't actually lose

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