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Wormskull
Aug 23, 2009

I for one prefer Kylra to Taint Reaper.

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Mobzy
Mar 22, 2010

Poster: Me
Date: Tomorrow
Cause: I deranked in CS:GO
Method: I will lie down on the floor and pull the lever which will drop a Microsoft Original Xbox on my head. Quick and painless.

01011001
Dec 26, 2012

Is it fascism yet posted:

rule update: Betting on yourself is NOT allowed and wont net you any games After your selfmade death.

fronz
Apr 7, 2009



Lipstick Apathy

Mobzy posted:

Poster: Me
Date: Tomorrow
Cause: I deranked in CS:GO
Method: I will lie down on the floor and pull the lever which will drop a Microsoft Original Xbox on my head. Quick and painless.

THis checks out - the xbox is really big

Tekopo
Oct 24, 2008

When you see it, you'll shit yourself.


Effectronica posted:

Poster: Tekopo
Date: November 2015
Cause: Volko Ruhnke announces Talisman and Munchkin will be the main inspirations for the COIN series going forward.
Method: Fatal counter-clipping.
:catstare:

discount cathouse
Mar 25, 2009
Nobody reads the loving rules

red plastic cup
Apr 25, 2012

Reach WITH IN To your LOCAL cup and you may find A Friend And Boy...
It's going to be me

Soral
May 30, 2009

Poster: jesus love robwell
Death: today
Cause: actually it isnt a suicide its a murder by my own hand for his bad posts
Method: nasty karate chops

qnqnx
Nov 14, 2010

Soral posted:

Poster: jesus love robwell
Death: today
Cause: actually it isnt a suicide its a murder by my own hand for his bad posts
Method: nasty karate chops

That's not how you do a suicide betting pool, but I support your motion

Schnedwob
Feb 28, 2014

my legs are okay
you guys can bet that as soon as ebola hits and i clear out my steam backlog i am dunzo

Doctor Goat
Jan 22, 2005

Where does it hurt?

Schnedwob posted:

you guys can bet that as soon as ebola hits and i clear out my steam backlog i am dunzo

it's impossible to clear out your backlog. if you played every game you'd get a bunch of rare cards you could sell to get free games and it'd just keep going

Stink fag
Aug 21, 2014

WORST FORUMS GUY posted:

Poster: Wormskull
Death: Q4, 2015

Cause: The announcement of quake 5 as a free to play, pay to win shooter
Method: throwing his PC in his bathtub with him

His computer wouldn't be able to fit in there with him. gently caress off.

Black Baby Goku
Apr 2, 2011

by Nyc_Tattoo

Stink fag posted:

His computer wouldn't be able to fit in there with him. gently caress off.

listen you big loving fail, he had tubfitter come in and convert the old tub with a new retrofit, WITHOUT having to rip the goddamn walls up. geeesh. some peoiple

Knuc U Kinte
Aug 17, 2004

Borsche69 posted:

conceited guy because he'll finally have enough of reading his own lovely posts

Lmao.

Wormskull
Aug 23, 2009

Mach2
Feb 28, 2014
Poster: Eonwe
Death: March 2015
Reason: Realizing his mistake in joining the Imp Zone while enjoying MMOs.
Method: Infection from his poop sock

conceitedguy
Nov 8, 2013

Borsche was right.

Fellis
Feb 14, 2012

Kid, don't threaten me. There are worse things than death, and uh, I can do all of them.
Poster: Zoq-Fot-Pik
Death: May 2015
Reason: Purchased what he thought was an original Quake CD at a flea market but was actually a DVD containing only EA, Ubisoft, and Activison titles
Method: bugcatching Gamer AIDS

Abandon
Nov 23, 2006
i lack the constitution

it is death to mock a gamer, to love a gamer, to be a gamer

SnotGrumble
Jun 4, 2003

All men live in fear of him and his Moxie.
Poster: SniperWoreConverse
Death: January 1st 2015
Cause: The pressure to keep the KODP thread updated becomes too much to bare.
Method: Thinking he will become a beast of chaos, he removes the hell worm from his aquarium and inserts it in his rectum. It quickly eats him away from the inside leaving him a dried husk.

Fargield
Sep 27, 2008

WORST FORUMS GUY posted:

[me as the parametric]: see if the PC works still

lol

Plutonis
Mar 25, 2011

Poster: Zoq-Fot-Pik
and zen sex robot.
Death: November 2014
Reason: Ralp de-IKs them and appoints JesusLovesRonwell and Putty in their places.
Method: simultaneous homicide with both stabbing each other with swords

discount cathouse
Mar 25, 2009
Oh god i just remebered that putty is a person that exists. odds on my suicide: more likely

Wormskull
Aug 23, 2009

TheLovablePlutonis posted:

Poster: Zoq-Fot-Pik
and zen sex robot.
Death: November 2014
Reason: Ralp de-IKs them and appoints JesusLovesRonwell and Putty in their places.
Method: simultaneous homicide with both stabbing each other with swords

Sword murdering is extremely epic. *blows loudly on a bagpipe for the fallen Zoq-Fot-Pik.

discount cathouse
Mar 25, 2009

Wormskull posted:

Sword murdering is extremely epic. *blows loudly on a bagpipe for the fallen Zoq-Fot-Pik.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K_sq6x6l8Nc&t=30s

elf help book
Aug 5, 2004

Though the battle might be endless, I will never give up

The Protagonist
Jun 29, 2009

The average is 5.5? I thought it was 4. This is very unsettling.

TheLovablePlutonis posted:

Poster: Zoq-Fot-Pik
and zen sex robot.
Death: November 2014
Reason: Ralp de-IKs them and appoints JesusLovesRonwell and Putty in their places.
Method: simultaneous homicide with both stabbing each other with swords

i'm imagining this but mirrored on itself

Mung Dynasty
Jul 19, 2003

Why do the peasants slave while the emperor gets to eat all the mung?!

The Protagonist posted:

i'm imagining this but mirrored on itself


dude on the left is surprisingly chill for a good portion of this

Zoq-Fot-Pik
Jun 27, 2008

Frungy!

Wormskull posted:

Sword murdering is extremely epic. *blows loudly on a bagpipe for the fallen Zoq-Fot-Pik.

Thank you.

Zoq-Fot-Pik
Jun 27, 2008

Frungy!

VideoGames
Aug 18, 2003
Poster: knuc u kinte
Death: christmas 2014
Reason: fed up with dealing with shitheads on the forum which turns into seeing shitheads in real life which turns into feeling of solipsism
Method: drives a car off a cliff while playing hit bee gees track stayin alive in a last ditch attempt to show the world what it could have been and why it fails so loving hard

Wormskull
Aug 23, 2009

VideoGames posted:

Poster: knuc u kinte
Death: christmas 2014
Reason: fed up with dealing with shitheads on the forum which turns into seeing shitheads in real life which turns into feeling of solipsism
Method: drives a car off a cliff while playing hit bee gees track stayin alive in a last ditch attempt to show the world what it could have been and why it fails so loving hard

Poster: Knuc U Kinte
Sex: Yes please! lol
Location: In you wife's bed lulz

Zoq-Fot-Pik
Jun 27, 2008

Frungy!

Wormskull posted:

Poster: Knuc U Kinte
Sex: Yes please! lol
Location: In you wife's bed lulz

extremebuff
Jun 20, 2010

do i still drop loot if i kill myself? v important question for my clan

SeXReX
Jan 9, 2009

I drink, mostly.
And get mad at people on the internet


:emptyquote:
Poster: Sexrex
Death: October 3rd 2015
Cause: bad speedrun anxiety
Method: Helium tank

Seshoho Cian
Jul 26, 2010

Just want to say that posting your own suicide is not only against the rules as laid out by the OP but is also unfunny and uninteresting

Kurtofan
Feb 16, 2011

hon hon hon
is bad cholesterol a form of suicide

SunAndSpring
Dec 4, 2013

The Protagonist posted:

i'm imagining this but mirrored on itself


I like how the cameraman just blasts the dude who just got stabbed with his lens flash, blinding him. Way to rub salt in the wound, dude.

Also it's funny how the stabber rams his face into the dude's shoulder in the process, knocking his glasses off and blinding himself as well. What a klutz.

The Taint Reaper
Sep 4, 2012

by Shine

Kylra posted:

Poster: The Taint Reaper
Death: Q4 2015
Cause: Persistent attempts to acquire a sense of humor.
Method: Finally reaps own taint while making another failed unfunny thread in the Imp Zone.

Get help ttr. You CAN get a sense of humor. It's not too late.

It's one thing when a regular poster does it, it's another when some loving new guy anime avatar I don't recognize decides to do it.

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Kurtofan
Feb 16, 2011

hon hon hon

The Protagonist posted:

i'm imagining this but mirrored on itself


the most anime of assassinations

"senpai you've lost your glasses!!"

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